01x33 - Melter Skelter

[bunniefuu]

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Izzy: (reads) "Then fluffy says, to Mr. Fox,

'get out of my hood!'"

Beth: Guys?

Where are you guys?

Guys! (Rumbling)

(Blocks clatter)

(Breathing hard)

- Uh, are you okay?

'Cause it looks like you're gonna spew!

- Last night... I saw...

a commercial for the everything horse!

All: Wow!

- My cousin is getting an everything horse

for her birthday and I need to get one before she does

because I hate my cousin. - Cool.

What's it do?

- (Gasps) Only everything!

- I'm bored. - Bored?

That's because you don't have the everything horse!

(Poof, horse whinnies)

A hyper realistic toy horse so you can ride!

But with one push of a button...

now your horse is a unicorn!

Woooooow!

- But that's not all! The horn is also a cool,

non-copyright-infringing laser sword!

That's full of candy!

- Wow. I love candy and swords!

If only it was sea-worthy.

- Look!

- Wish granted!

Now it is!

Your very own -

Viking ship!

- Yar. - "Yar" is what pirates say.

That horse is clearly a Viking ship.

C'mon! Learn your history!

- That's sounds good and all,

but I'd rather play with my baby doll.

- Then listen to this!

- When your conquest of foreign lands is over, guess what?

The everything horse is ready to settle down

and have... a baby!

All: Awwww!

- I need some baby horse!

- Yeah, but can it do this?

Yeeeaaa!!! OOH!

- Would you let me finish?!

- Did you think just because the everything horse

had a baby she wouldn't be fun anymore? Wrong!

This hard working horse mother is also a full-time ninja!

- Okay, now I'm finished.

All: Yay!!!

- I wanna change horse diapers!

- What kind of candy is in the horse's unicorn sword?

- Where did the ninja horse train?

- I have no idea!

But we gotta tell Chef we need an everything horse.

All: Cheeeeeeeeeeeef!

(Rumbling)

- What's the matter? Who's hurt?

- We have an emergency...

for a new toy!

- Called the bazooka lightning shark!

- It's called "the everything horse".

- Yeah, that! My bad!

- I did a head count and we need at least two dozen!

Chef: Why would you need a new toy?

You've got plenty of toys.

Look at this great horse!

(Flies buzz)

- Does it turn into a boat?

- Uh, I don't think you really know how horses work.

Or boats.

And look at this cool sword!

- Is it full of candy? - What?! No.

That's not where candy comes from!

Swords are made of brawn and steel!

How are you today, sandy doll?

(Evil laugh)

Ahhh! Possessed evil doll! Get away from me!

- Nice. I'll take that.

- Beth, the angel wings harp!

You begged me for weeks for this.

- Chef! We need the everything horse!

Aaaahhhhhhh!!!!

- Now, there is no need for new toys

as long as these ones are all still here.

End of discussion.

All: (Disappointed) Awwww.

Leshawna: Like speckles, the class guinea pig,

that dream is dead.

- Guys, we can't give up now!

Do you listen to your mom

when she tells you a thousand times to "quit it!"?

Both: No.

- Yes! I mean - no!

- That's right! 'Cause we aren't quitters!

- But Chef said he wouldn't buy one.

- Chef said he wouldn't buy one

as long as we have all these toys...

So we get rid of them and Chef'll buy us -

the everything horse!

- Well, what are we waiting for?

Let's get rid of these toys!

- I don't know if I'm okay with this, dude.

- I'm getting the everything horse!

I'm getting the everything horse!

I'm getting the everything horse!

♪♪♪

(Tires screech)

(Toys squeak)

(Splash)

(Water runs)

(Gurgles, water splashes)

- Aaahhhhh!!! OOH!

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Ahhhhhhh!

(Tires screech)

(Glass shatters)

- There's a note on it! - What's it say?

- (Reads) "Don't send us your stinky toys,

we wanted an everything horse."

Yeah. I want an everything horse too.

Well, looks like we won't be getting

the everything horse after all.

- I know how to get rid of those toys.

Below us an inferno rages

with a fury of fire and brimstone.

In the spooky basement is a furnace,

which is alive.

With flames so hot,

they'll melt anyone who comes before it.

- Mwahahaha!

- Ahhhh!

(Woozy moan, sheep bleat))

- Wow, Gwen.

You made Cody faint! - Fine.

There's a furnace in the basement.

Toss the toys in there and they'll be gone for good.

- Let's take those toys to the basement and--

- Guys, the everything horse looks awesome,

but we love our old toys too.

We don't wanna just toss 'em into--

- Burn 'em! Who's in?

All: Me! - Who-hoo! Fire party!

- What's wrong, Jude?

We have to stop Beth from burning our toys.

Are you in? - Yeah, okay.

- What happened to you, dude?

- What do you mean? I'm just eating pudding.

(Squirts)

- You gotta learn to use a spoon.

- How much further is the bottom?

- I'm scared! I don't think I wanna see the furnace!

- Uh, maybe we should turn back?

If Cody gets scared again,

he could possibly wet himself! - (Sigh)

Do I need to remind you, guys, why we're doing this?

Male announcer: You need the everything horse!

- I'm convinced. - Good point.

C'mon, let's keep moving!

Oh, and by the way,

be careful on the next set of stairs.

They might be a little slipperyyyyyyyyyyy--

Ahhhhhhh!

(Hard thuds, pained screams)

Ahhhhhhhhhh!

(Hard thuds, pained screams)

- It's not a race, Harold!

(Bag thuds)

Where did he go?

- Look! Harold!!!

- Maybe something's got him? (Whimpers)

- Haha! He just went ahead without us.

Oh, something totally got him!

(Door shuts) - What was that?!

- Relax, Cody. If something is hunting us in the dark

I doubt we'd even hear it coming.

- Oh, that's true. Phew.

Wait, what?!

- (Exhales) Hasn't Chef heard of an elevator?

(Bat screeches)

Juuuuuuuddddeeee! Waaaiiitttuuuuppp!

- Are we there yeeeet?

- Yes! - Really?

The answer is never yes!

(Low snarling)

- Alright. Let's do this!

(Flames crackle)

- Wait! You can't burn our toys.

Sure, they're old, but they're ours!

We've played with them for half our lives.

Which might be short, but it's long to us.

Leshawna, won't you be sad

if there's no baby-burps-it up...

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(Huge belch)

- Yeah, my ears are still ringing,

but I would really miss her.

- And what about you, Cody,

and that weird toy you like to play with?

♪♪♪

- I'm scared of that thing.

But maybe burning it is not the right answer.

Beth: That's the last of 'em.

(Flames crackle)

Way to make me do all the work

while you all yip-yap about who-knows-what.

(Harp music)

All: (Gasp)

- Beth, your harp!

It's like a sign...

- Now, let's go get us an everything horse!

- So, what do we tell Chef?

- Simple. The toys accidentally fell down the stairs

and bounced into the furnace!

Oh. My. Gosh.

Eeeeee! My plan worked!

- Well, not exactly...

it kind of all started minutes ago.

Well, I blew our toy budget for the next two years,

but since you all wanted it so badly

and since you always take such good care

of all of your other toys,

you deserve it!

Tada! The everything horse!

(All cheer and laugh)

- Yeah, you basically burned all the other toys for nothing!

- Oh, who cares?

We got an everything horse!

How is it?! How is it?! How is it?!

Is it as awesome as they said it'd be?

- Without question the greatest thing

that's ever happened to us!

We used it as a boat, a car, a hat, an accounting firm,

a table at a low key but super classy restaurant,

and a space ship that broke on re-entry

into earth's atmosphere!

- Why am I not already riding the everything horse?!

- Um, I told you. Because it broke on reentry

into earth's atmosphere.

Beth: Noooooooooooo!!!

Myyy eeeeeeverything hooorse!

(Sniffling)

- I know you're sad, Beth, but look on the bright side.

You got to flush your toys down the toilet,

sh**t 'em in a catapult

and catch 'em on fire.

That was fun!

And you may not have any toys,

but at least you still have all your friends.

- Aw, thanks, Jude.

- Hey, where's Harold?

- Hellooooooo? (Echoes) Ahh!

- (Evil laugh) - Ahhhh!