[Beavis and Butt-Head snickering]
[upbeat rock music]
♪ ♪
- [chuckles]
Todd's cool.
- Yeah, yeah. [snickers] Todd's cool.
[snickers] Yeah.
- Hey. What are you two girls lookin' at?
- Hey, Butt-Head, he noticed us.
[snickers] - Yeah. [chuckles]
Just at least try to act cool, Beavis.
- I hope they have a hospital in your kindergarten, man,
'cause if you don't stop lookin' at me,
that's where you're gonna end up.
- Whoa, see? He did it again, Butt-Head.
[snickers] He's talking to us.
- [chuckles] This is cool.
- All right, that's it. I warned you.
- Ahh!
[punches smacking] Ahh!
[Todd grunts] Ahh! Ow!
- Hey, how's it going? - Ahh! Oh!
[Butt-Head grunts] [punches smacking]
- [snickers] - [chuckles]
- Well, I'd love to stay and kick your asses some more,
but my shiftin' hand is starting to hurt.
[car door closes]
[engine starts]
[tires squeal]
- He sure is cool.
- Yeah. Yeah. [snickers]
- Hey, Beavis, let's follow him
and find out how come he's cool.
- Yeah. [snickers] Yeah, yeah.
And then we can become cool too.
[both snicker] Yeah.
[tires screech]
[muffled rock music playing]
♪ ♪
[both snickering]
- Whoa, hey. Hey, that's it.
That's his car! [snickers]
- Oh, yeah. Cool.
[muffled rock music playing]
- I guess I'll just park right here now.
[both snickering]
- This is cool.
- Yeah, yeah.
[both snicker]
[muffled rock music playing]
Yeah, yeah. [snickers]
This is gonna be cool.
[both snicker]
- Whoa. [chuckles]
Todd.
- [groaning]
[both snicker] - Whoa.
- Hey.
- Hey, how's it going? [snickers]
- Who the hell are you, man?
- We're, like, your friends.
- We're, like, in your g*ng and stuff, you know?
It's like, you know, we hang out
and stuff like that, you know?
It's pretty cool. [snickers]
- Whatever. [groans]
[retches]
- [snickers]
This rules. - Beavis.
This is the coolest thing that has ever happened.
[chuckles]
- So, uh, Todd. [chuckles]
Since we're, like, friends--
this is cool. [chuckles]
Can you tell us how to, like, you know,
get chicks to do it?
- Yeah, that's a good question. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Come on, tell us. [snickers]
- [slurring] Listen, man, you gotta...
get this--[mumbles]
Take her back and do it
and have it and grab it and...
grab it and then whoo-hoo! All right.
And then you got her, man.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. [snickers] See?
See, that's what I've been telling you, Butt-Head.
It's, like, you gotta take her bike
and then drive her real slow, you know what I'm saying?
[snickers] - Beavis, you dumbass.
That's not what he said.
- [snickers] So, um--so Todd,
where are you supposed to take her bike?
- What? - Damn it, Beavis, shut up.
[chuckles] So, uh, Todd,
like, what's your secret for buying beer?
- Yeah, yeah.
Beer is cool too. Yeah. [snickers]
You can tell us. You're among friends now.
[snickers] Yeah.
- [slurring] Oh, man. It's easy, man.
You go to this place... - Oh, yeah?
- And you gotta...
give him, like, [indistinct].
And then whoo!
Oh, you're out of luck, man.
And then oh. Oh.
And then all that.
- Really? [snickers]
So all you gotta do is, like, go give 'em some tiger nachos?
I would have been buying beer every day if I knew that.
- Damn it, Beavis. Shut the hell up!
What the hell kind of stupid wuss
dumbass wuss crap are you talking about?
- [slurring] Who the hell is saying...
- Butt-Head. - Everything.
- I think you should listen more closely to what Todd said.
It's, like, um-- [snickers]
'Cause that's, um-- that's what he said.
Yeah, so, um--so Todd,
how can we get cool like you? [snickers]
- [slurring] Guys, it's like, [indistinct].
- Oh, yeah? [snickers]
- [indistinct] - Burgers and zingers.
- Beavis. - I'm like, "Yeah?"
- Damn it, Beavis, don't make me kick your ass.
[Todd laughs] All right, that's it.
- Hey, cut it out! Ahh!
Damn it! Ahh! [Todd groans]
- [groans]
What did--
[coughs]
- Ahh! - Ahh.
- What the hell are you little turds doing here?
- [chuckles] Uh...
We're, like, your best friends.
- Yeah, yeah. That's what you said.
[snickers] - What the--
I'd kick your asses if I didn't have such a headache, man.
- Ow. - [chuckles]
- [sighs, grumbles]
Look, if I ever catch you two near me again, you're dead.
And if I find out you told anyone I talked to you,
you're twice as dead.
[engine rumbles]
[tires squeal]
- [chuckles] Damn.
How does somebody get to be so cool?
- Yeah. [snickers] Todd's cool.
[upbeat rock music]
- Okay, kids. Arnold's is proud to present--
- Um, this is like, um, some show, right?
- Weezer!
- Uh, of course it is, buttmunch.
It's on TV. [chuckles] - Um, oh, yeah.
- ♪ What's with these homies ♪
- No, but, um, I don't think this is a video.
- Uh. [chuckles]
They don't play many videos anymore.
It's all, like, shows
and, like, people snowboarding and stuff.
- I think this is-- I think this is "Happy Days."
- Yeah. [chuckles]
"Crappy Days." [both snicker]
- Pretty funny, Butt-Head.
Instead of "Happy Days," you called it "Crappy Days."
[both snicker]
One, two, three, four.
A schmeagle, a schlong,
a [indistinct] incorporated!
- Yeah. [both snicker]
♪ We're gonna do it ♪
- ♪ Give us any chance, we'll take it ♪
♪ Give us any [mumbles] and we'll break it ♪
Uh, were gonna make it. We're not gonna fake it.
♪ All we need is just a little patience ♪
[both snicker] - Yeah.
I liked this show better
when that other dude owned the restaurant--
that dude from "Karate Kid."
- [snickers] Oh, yeah.
Daniel-san, if answer come from inside you,
always right.
[snickers] - Yeah. [chuckles]
That dude could kick Fonzie's ass.
- Yeah, yeah. Fonzie doesn't even know Karate.
[snickers]
- ♪ Whoo-hoo ♪
- ♪ And you know I'm yours ♪
- These dudes were always, like,
calling each other nerds and stuff.
- Yeah. I wonder why. [snickers]
- Uh, I think it was, like, back in the old days
before they invented words like nad
and buttmunch and dumbass.
- Yeah, yeah. [snickers]
Things are a lot better now.
- Yeah. [chuckles]
Buttmunch.
[both snicker]
You know what else they're always saying?
They're always saying, like, "sit on it."
- Sit on what?
[both snicker]
What? What? What?
Oh, yeah. [both snicker]
Oh, yeah.
This is a pretty cool show.
[both snicker]
[upbeat rock music]
♪ ♪
07x31 - Drinking Butt-ies
Watch/Buy Amazon Merchandise
Adult animated series follows Beavis and Butt-Head, both voiced by Judge, a pair of teenage slackers characterized by their apathy, lack of intelligence, lowbrow humor, and love for hard rock and heavy metal music.
Adult animated series follows Beavis and Butt-Head, both voiced by Judge, a pair of teenage slackers characterized by their apathy, lack of intelligence, lowbrow humor, and love for hard rock and heavy metal music.