[soft country chords]
[distant TV]
[door opens]
Hi, Dad
Oh, my God
Alyssa?
[Leslie chuckles]
[Alyssa] He smells exactly the same
[James] I thought I should give Alyssa
and her dad some space
He a poof?
He's my boyfriend
[silence]
Is that mine?
Yeah
It suits you
Well, you turned out all right,
didn't you?
- You're gorgeous!
- Shut up
No, no, I'm serious
You were a f*cking weird-looking kid
I'm relieved
Smoke?
[Leslie] How's your ma?
Yeah, fine
Married to a total d*ck, but...
fine
Can we stay with you for a bit?
[Alyssa] Please say yes
Course you can
You're my blood, girl
Cool. Thanks
So, you run away, then?
From your ma's?
You're my blood all right
[Leslie chuckles]
We're in trouble
[dissonant chords]
[Leslie] Pregnant?
[Alyssa] Worse
[Leslie] How much?
A lot
[Alyssa] I will tell him what we've done
At some point
We didn't know where else to go
Well, you're safe as houses here
OK?
- You can stay as long as you want
- Thanks
[Leslie] You OK, James?
[Leslie] That becomes a bed
[Alyssa] Oh, what, like a fold-out? Cool
No. Just becomes a bed if you sleep on it
I'm through at the back there,
and the bathroom's in there
Ah, it's so good to see you, girl
[insects chirp]
Sleep tight
[Alyssa] He's all right
He's actually, genuinely all right
[door closes]
[clang]
[rock music]
[seagulls cry]
[whistling]
[howls]
[howling continues]
[music stops]
[James] Leslie was pretty different
James?
Yeah?
Do you want to throw knives?
What?
You never thrown a Kn*fe before?
Uh, no
Take your shirt off
[soft percussions]
[seagulls cry]
[Leslie] Uh, not bad
[percussions intensify]
[clang]
[drumroll]
[soft percussions]
Beginner's luck
Yeah, right
You want a beer?
Do you look after her, James?
Yeah
Good
That's very good
[music stops]
Did she ever mention me?
- Yeah
- And?
Does she...
love me, do you think?
Yeah
[soft country chords]
[James] I'd never met
someone like Leslie
Not an adult
He seemed like one, most of the time,
but it was like he was...
missing parts
[music fades]
What's she done to her hair?
[silence]
[Gwen] Oh, God
[beep]
[Teri] As you can see,
your children seem to have committed
another serious crime
She's not doing anything, is she?
It's him!
He's the one with the f*cking g*n
Gwen!
Do you know where James got a g*n from?
He never had a g*n
He only ever had his Kn*fe
What the hell is the matter with you?
[door opens and slams shut]
[Tony sighs]
[door opens]
[Phil sighs]
It's his birthday tomorrow. He'll be 18
[Phil sighs]
18
[Phil] Here, look
Look at him
She k*lled herself, his mum
[clock ticks]
She did it in front of him
[Phil sniffles]
[Leslie] Hope you like well done
Well done as in, like, f*cking cremated
[rock music on radio]
Dig in
Thanks, Dad
[Alyssa] I love saying that
Slainte!
- You should come out on me boat
- You got a boat?
Nothing flashy, a little cuddy cabin,
but she's cute
I'll take us out this afternoon,
if you want?
Cool!
[Alyssa] I can't believe
my dad has a boat
Basically means that I've got a boat
[Leslie] Right, let's do it!
[Jonno] Leslie!
[Jonno] Les!
What?
[Jonno] Did you not see the rota?
I stuck it on your fridge
[Leslie] Ah, for f*ck's sake!
[Leslie] Today?
Like now?
[Leslie] Can't you do it?
[Jonno] No. I got to take Dad to be bled
[Leslie] All right, change of plan
We'll do the boat later, OK?
Why?
Um, I've just got to do a bit
of work from home
You just chill out here, OK?
OK
[Teri] It would seem safe to assume
they're headed to Alyssa's father:
Leslie Foley
He's got previous, nothing major:
cautions and suspended
The local PCs, they checked him out
when we identified Alyssa,
but he no longer lives
at his given address
She thinks he still does
So we move out there,
and we wait for them to show up
[Leslie] Good man
He's gonna take us
I know
- I think your dad's a drug dealer
- Cool
- But...
- What?
[James] It seemed like Alyssa
was deliberately missing the point
Is this the best place for us to stay?
[whispers] We k*lled a guy
[Alyssa] No way am I leaving yet
Stop worrying
He's going to look after us
We're totally safe here
[dissonant chords]
[Leslie] Hey, Alyssa, meet Jonno
[Alyssa] Hey
[Leslie] Check this out
[Jonno] Whoa!
[Alyssa laughs]
[James] We definitely weren't safe
[Eunice] We must find them
before they do anything else
Or we could...
let them carry on for a couple of days
- What?
- Well, he's 18 tomorrow
That's proper prison, that is
I'm joking
He's just a kid
No, he's not
[ominous chords]
[Leslie] Go easy on these
They're rocket fuel
- What?
- Nothing
Well, they've got to get it from someone
[Leslie chuckles]
[Leslie] It's completely ethical
That's the beauty of it
Everything's locally sourced, organic
[Indian music]
No g*ng warfare bullshit,
no women swallowing condoms,
no kids getting hurt
[Leslie groans]
[Leslie] This world, man
"Hey, kids, don't do dr*gs,
but do nag your mum to buy you a phone
hewn from the sweat and tears
of a modern sl*ve."
- You understand me, don't you, girl?
- Yeah
Gotta fight the system
You got to, kiddo
Because we live
in properly f*cked-up times
Don't you forget that
The wisest thing
anyone's ever said to me, right?
Wanna hear this?
- James, you listening?
- Yeah
"To be mad in a deranged world
is not madness. It's sanity."
Who said that?
Me
[Alyssa] He's basically Gandhi
You are golden, you know that?
[Leslie] Golden!
[James] Leslie talked a lot
[music stops]
Want one?
[Eunice sighs]
Eunice?
No, thanks
You know, Clive Koch
could well have been self-defense
Well, we don't have proof,
so you can't assume that
And you can't assume the opposite
I feel sorry for them, all right? I do
I think they're miserable,
f*cked-up, stupid kids
who've done something bad,
but we don't know why...
I don't care why!
I care that they don't k*ll someone else
Teri, I'm not...
- We're not social services!
- That's not...
What good does feeling sorry for them do?
What does it actually do?
[ominous chords]
We need to find them
We. Find. Them
With an armed response unit
that scares the sh*t out of them?
So, what do you suggest?
We coax them out with a giant Toblerone
and hope for the best?
[soft percussions]
I'm still not convinced he was armed
Well, we're going
to have to behave like he was
Is this about something else?
What?
No!
OK
Sorry
I just think someone should talk to them,
not wave a g*n at them
Well, someone is very welcome
to talk to them
as soon as they're locked up
Talk to them,
understand them, I don't know,
teach them f*cking whittling
I don't care
[foreboding music]
[music fades]
So, what do you think of him?
[James] Sometimes,
it was important to lie
Yeah, he's all right
"All right?"
All right, like good
You don't get it
[Leslie] Ah, right
Who's for a pint?
Are we not going out on the boat?
Ah, girl, I'm knackered
Do you mind?
I'll take you out tomorrow, I promise
OK
Cross my heart
OK
[seagulls cry]
[Leslie] Come on, James!
[thumping music]
[music stops]
[distant chatter and laughter]
[dog barks]
♪ Oh, Daddy ♪
♪ You know you make me cry ♪
♪ How can you love me? ♪
[Alyssa] It's so weird
When you've wanted something
for so long...
and you've been so frightened
it'll be sh*t...
and then...
it's not sh*t at all
It's amazing
♪ It's got to be me ♪
♪ Yes, it's got to be me ♪
[music fades]
What are you drinking?
You haven't seen either of them?
I told you. No
[Teri] And Leslie?
No idea
He moved out months ago
Just in case
[sniffs]
[ominous music]
[upbeat country music]
- Alyssa?
- Yeah?
Maybe we shouldn't stay here too long
What?
I just think that we should
maybe keep moving
Do what you want
[melancholy country]
♪ If you tell me that she's not here ♪
♪ I'll follow the trail of her tears... ♪
[Leslie] I missed you, darling
♪ That's how I got to Memphis ♪
Look at you! [chuckles]
Look at you!
- Hey! Hey!
- What?
Hey, let's do the thing!
What thing?
- Yeah?
- Oh, yeah!
[James] Alyssa felt far away from me
It was like we'd gone back
♪ That's how I got to Memphis ♪
♪ That's how I got to... ♪
[Leslie] I haven't seen you in ten years!
[Leslie sobs]
[Alyssa] Dad?
What is it? Are you all right?
I... I'm... I'm useless
I'm f*cking useless
f*ck...
No, you're not!
What?
You're not useless
[Alyssa] A card every year without fail
I think that's pretty good, Dad
♪ ...tell her that I love her so ♪
[Alyssa] It's all right
[Leslie sighs]
It's all right
[lively chatter]
[James] I'd started to think
that maybe I should just go
Leave Alyssa with her dad
She seemed happy
[Leslie] I'm not even joking. Right?
Shorts. That's it
The whole year round
He doesn't even own
a pair of trousers, do you, Jonno?
No
What did you wear
to your ma's funeral?
Black shorts
[Leslie] Black shorts!
[Leslie] Black f*cking shorts!
[James] But then everything changed
Les. Les!
- You found him, then?
- Oh, come on, Debbie, not now
- Yeah. Come over here
- No, Debbie. Honestly, you should go home
[Leslie] Seriously
We'll only end up rowing
You don't want that
[Debbie] Come here!
She's a bit unstable, you know?
In the head
[Debbie] The Police are looking for her,
what's she done?
[Alyssa] Are you f*cking kidding me?
[Leslie] Big deal
Like you never did that
[Debbie] I need you to take an interest
I can't do this on my own
[Debbie] It's just not fair
[Leslie] OK, I'm listening
[Leslie] What do you need?
[Debbie] A new school uniform
[Leslie] Why?
[span style="style_1"/][Alyssa] No, no...
[Debbie] ...he's grown
and he looks like a prick!
[Leslie] What do you want me to do?
[Leslie] He's not gonna stop growing!
[Debbie] Give me money
Is he your dad?
[Leslie] No. Look, Lyss, it's not like...
- He's just...
- Were you going to tell me?
[Leslie] Ah, man, this is too much
This is like some kind of f*cking ambush
I'm going home
[door opens]
[Debbie shouts] Oi! No, you're not!
Get f*cking back here!
[dog whines]
[engine starts]
[thump] [yelp]
[dog whines]
[truck drives off]
Yeah, we'll get some sleep now
OK. Night
So, the local team have set up
surveillance at his ex-girlfriend's
There's no sign of the kids yet
We'll go back over first thing
Um...
Do you want to share a room?
What?
Save the taxpayer
No, I don't
Hiya. Two single rooms, please
[dog whines]
His neck's broken
We have to k*ll it
Yeah
[foreboding music]
[dog whines]
[meow] [slash]
I can't do it
- Are you crying?
- No
[dog whines]
[crunch] [dog yelps]
[sniffling]
[music builds]
[phone chimes]
[TV] Members of the public are advised
not to approach them
They are likely still armed
Holy f*ck
[TV continues]
There is a reward for any information
Please call now
[foreboding music]
01x07 - Episode 7
Watch/Buy Amazon Books
Series is based on Charles Forsman's mini-comics The End of the f*cking World, which were collected into a book in 2013.
Series is based on Charles Forsman's mini-comics The End of the f*cking World, which were collected into a book in 2013.