Well, I may not be addressed
to dear that Santa Claus Lane
I had a list so big that
I couldn't shy away
I had so much fun waiting
for that Christmas day
I wrote down everything I wanted
and you know I had to check it twice
And how to make sure to tell him everything,
how I worked hard to be so nice
Because when I closed my eyes on Christmas Eve,
I wanted everything to be just right.
Dear Santa, oh,
Dear Santa.
Zeus: Ah, the beautiful, rocky mountains.
Skiing, sledding, ice skating.
Not to mention that crisp mountain air.
Mmm, it's the perfect place for a Christmas vacation.
So, the missus and me decided to grab the kids
and hop into the Bannister family sleigh
for a good, old-fashioned, snow capped Christmas.
That's me right there, Zeus Bannister
and this is going to be the most
perfect Christmas vacation ever.
Ow!
Belinda: George, none of this looks familiar.
We're lost.
George: Belinda, I didn't spend an extra $ a day
for a state-of-the-art GPS system so we could be lost.
Well, honey, I don't know why we didn't
just use Mom's directions.
She comes here every year.
Your mother gets lost going to the bathroom.
Kara: Dad is so lost.
Ben: I know.
George, why don't we just
pull over and ask for directions?
Because George Bannister does not pull over
and ask for directions.
George Bannister knows exactly
how to get to Keystone Resort.
So, George Bannister is going to take us there.
We're heading the right way.
(beeping)
GPS: You are going the wrong way. You are going the wrong way.
This thing might be broken.
Stewey: Ted. You see that?
- What?
- You see that?
Ted: See what?
Oh, nothing. I just thought I saw...
- Stewey.
- What?
Remember what Dr. Daley said?
I know, I know, I know.
That's all in my head.
Yeah.
Hey, listen. We gotta get somethin'
to eat because I'm hungry.
So once I'll be finished here,...
You ate a half hour.
You had a bologna sandwich.
Again, a half hour but that was then.
This is now.
I've been locked up for a year, Ted.
You understand me?
Eating mashed potatoes, fish 'n sticks.
I'm done with that stuff.
I'm ready for the holiday.
Chinese food, some steaks, some candles, Cuban sandwiches.
Stewey, relax.
We finish this job, you can have all the steaks you want.
Forever.
Really?
You. You always know how to make me feel better.
(engine starts)
Silent Night
Holy Night
All is calm
All is bright
Round yon virgin
Mother and child
Holy infant so tender and mild
Sleep in heavenly peace
Sleep in heavenly peace
Silent Night
Holy Night
All is calm
All is bright
Radiant beams from Thy holy face
With the dawn of redeeming grace
Sleep in heavenly peace
Sleep in heavenly peace
Sleep in heavenly peace
Here we are. Keystone Resort.
See? I told you we'd make it.
You are gonna have so much fun here.
There is so much to do. They have Kidtopia.
They've got skiing and tubing.
- Cool.
- Whoa.
They've got things for Zeusy.
You are gonna have an absolute ball this Christmas.
Ahh. Kids, take it all in.
(breathing deeply)
This is the freshest air a Bannister's ever gonna smell.
(crowd cheering)
It's London James!
London James? Where?! Where?!
Who is she?
Don't you ever watch T.V.?
She's a celebutante.
The kids love her.
No. She doesn't play sports.
I'm not gonna know who she is.
It's alright. Me and Zeus are gonna have
a great time together. Right, Zeus?
Ooh. Can I get an autograph?
Can I get an autograph?
This way. Coming through.
Wait for me. Come on. Let me see,
let me see. Come on. Get out of the way.
Missy: What are you looking at, mutt?
What did you call me?
Mutt. Mangy mutt.
I'll show you mangy.
- Whose dog is this? Can somebody please get this dog out of the way?
- I'd like to see you try.
London: Missy!
(radio chatter)
And you call yourself a Retriever?
Hey, don't blame me.
I'm out of practice.
Better lay off those biscuits, Tubby.
Ha, very funny. I'm still getting
used to the altitude here.
That doesn't explain why
you run like a girl.
Oh, yeah? Well, you run like a Chihuahua.
- Missy? Missy? Oh, come to Mommy. Come here, come here.
- Oh, help! There's a rabid dog chasing me!
- Cowabunga!
- Man: No, no, no!
(gasps)
Hans! Hans!
Hans!
- I'm so sorry. I- I-
- Hans!
Don't help me! Find my dog!
Find her dog!
Clean that! And that!
You're kidding. While we're here at the Keystone Resort,
we can enjoy the tubing, the various mountain games,
and the brand-new snow fort.
- Snow fort?
- Awesome. I can't wait to finally take
you down in a snowball fight.
Yeah. Fat chance, man.
Uh, well, George? You do remember what happened
the last time we had a snowball fight.
Yes, I do, Belinda and it wasn't my fault.
I didn't know it was ice.
- Well, honey, the consistency is completely different.
- Yeah, well, I didn't go to the university of snowball-fighting.
Welcome to Keystone Resort.
I'm Mr. Sotherby.
Oh, hello, Mr. Smotherby.
Sotherby. So-
Oh, hi.
Hi.
I'm George Bannister and this is my family.
Sotherby: Right. The ones who knocked over
the display in our village.
Great. We've been here minutes and
I'm already in the Christmas vacation dog house.
Ugh, I'm getting a headache.
Yes. Very sorry about that. Our, our little dog here, Zeus,
usually well-behaved, actually a trained K- .
Well, luckily for you, Miss James
declined to press charges.
If your mother wasn't one of our best guests,
I'd have you and your...
(sneezes)
four-legged terror escorted
from the premises immediately.
What's this guy's problem?
Actually, it's her mother.
Just...
(sneezing)
get that thing away from me.
I'm allergic.
Oy vey.
Now, here is a map. This is where your mother's
condominium is located right next to the side of the mountain.
Ok. Thank you, Mr. Stuck-upby.
Sotherby. Thank you, sir. Thanks.
Dashing through the snow
In a one-horse open sleigh
O'er the hills we go
Laughing all the way
Whoa! Check it out, kids.
Looks like we're gonna be spending
the holidays in style.
Awesome!
Oh, I bet the toilet bowls in this place
are filled with fresh, cold mountain spring water.
Take it all in, kids. This week's
gonna be just what we need.
Pure, unadulterated
peace and tranquility.
Ok, kids. Here we are.
So much for peace and tranquility.
My God! Someone's in the house!
Oh, honey, do you think it's a burglar?
Yeah, honey. Burglars hang
their underwear in a chandelier.
Whoever it is, they're very hungry.
Alright, Belinda. This is not a
good time to joke around, alright?
I'm going to check this out.
I don't like this at all.
Here, look. Go over there.
Okay. Give it to me.
Come on, Zeus. Come on. Let's go.
And you thought I was messy.
It's okay. It's alright. Stay here.
Clean as a whistle.
Alright. No one there.
Go upstairs.
Yeah, probably upstairs.
Go upstairs!
Go upstairs? No, because they'll come down!
George, go!
By myself?! Come on, Belinda!
Don't... It's okay.
What if I get hurt?
(screaming)
- Randy: Hey! What are you guys doing here?
- Randy!
Mom said that you were spending
Christmas at home in California.
And I could've sworn Mom told me
you guys were spending it back East.
You know she probably mixed it up.
That's Mom for ya.
- Hi! Come down.
- Okay, okay.
- Hey! I'm good.
- How you doin', Randy?
Hey, kids! Give your Uncle Randy
some love! Come on!
- Hey! Oh! Hey!
- Hi!
Hey, Zack! Come on down! Your cousins
are here! Come say, hello!
- You're okay, honey, right?
- Oh, yeah.
This must be that infamous K-
I've heard so much about.
Apollo, right?
It's Zeus!
Look at his face. He's adorable.
Just look at...
itty-witty-teeny-weeny-beeny-weeny-little
puppy dog face that you wanna eat you up! Look at you!
Belinda, are you sure
you're not adopted?
Listen, Randy. Thanks for stopping by, buddy.
Great to see you. I think, uh, we got it from here.
Still a kidder, Leslie, huh?
Ahh. You remember the middle name. Good for you.
So that's why you never told
me your middle name, huh, George?
Zack: Hey, Dad. Who's here?
Hey, there's my boy.
Aunt Belinda and Uncle George?
Hey, Zacky.
Palm strike!
(Karate yells)
He's, he's good.
Yeah. Karate three times a week.
Oh, that's great.
Hey, he just got his green belt.
Oh, good. You're okay, honey.
He's alright. He's alright.
- Where's Dottie and the girls?
- I wasn't ready.
She's working out-of-state.
Came up last minute.
Oh, and she brought
the girls with her?
No one wants to be
alone for Christmas.
Right.
So it's just us guys, right?
You got that right, Pops.
What was that?
Oh. Yeah, I forgot to tell you.
Folks, I have a very important
announcement to make.
What? You're gonna get another facelift?
Honey, that's enough.
We've made an addition to the family.
Belinda, Leslie, kids, I want
to introduce you to...
Bella! Come here, Bell.
You've been treating me
so sweet and kind
You're the reason why
I feel so good
You're always on my mind
What a babe.
Bella, this is everybody.
Everybody, this is Bella.
Bella: Careful, children. I
just got my hair done.
Hey, Zeus. Girls love it
when you take an initiative.
Go ahead and introduce yourself.
Go ahead.
Introduce myself? Of course.
Introduce myself.
(French accent)
Good afternoon, ma chérie.
Ugh, please. You are so
not my type.
And, uh, let these two
get acquainted, huh?
- Come on, kids.
- Okay.
My name is Zeus. You know,
like the Greek god.
Uh-huh.
Hey, you wanna hear a joke?
Not really.
How do you know when it's
raining cats and dogs?
I don't know.
When you step in a poodle.
A poodle. Get it? That's a good one.
(laughing)
Did you drink out of a wet
bowl when you were a puppy?
Ted. This is a hotel
for little people.
You told me we were gonna
stay at a four-star hotel
with room service, massages,
foot rubs, cable T.V.s.
I don't see none of that so far!
Relax. It's for one night, okay?
We steal this rich girl's necklace,
we are on a : flight to Cabo tomorrow.
They got pineapple juice down there?
Yeah. I don't know.
Alright.
Uh, help you guys?
You have jacuzzis in the rooms?
Jacuzzis? No, no, we got rooms, man.
You got room service in the rooms?
Yeah. Yeah, we got room service.
But it's closed.
That's alright. We're good.
We'll take it.
Alright. Let me get you
guys signed up here.
Pay the man.
Uh, yeah, sure.
You guys don't mind
sharing a bed, do ya?
Mom, I'm not sharing a room with him.
It's a big house and there's
plenty of room for everybody.
Then, he could share with someone else.
What was all that commotion in there, buddy?
Oh, you know, George. Kids.
What was that about?
Don't worry about it. Nothing.
- Hey. How's it goin' with the luggage?
- Hi.
Oh, good. We, uh, actually
have two more left. So,...
Oh, let me help.
Thank you.
Zack! Get out here and get these bags!
Oh.
Or you could get them.
Hey, Les. Great idea. You. Me.
Two-bit. Tomorrow morning. First thing.
Ooh! Ooh! I wanna go! I wanna go!
Uh, no can do. We, uh, actually
have spa appointments tomorrow.
I'm getting a massage.
George is getting a facial.
My first time.
A facial?
Come on! We gotta hit the slopes!
Well, I'd like to but, uh, I'm
doing a little family time.
Boring! Hasta mañana, Leslie.
Take it easy, Hercules.
It's Zeus!
See you inside, sis.
You know, he calls me that to get
under my skin! He knows I hate it!
Well, George. It is your middle name.
Yeah. But it's a little
feminine, don't you think?
(sighs)
Look, today is December th. We
have five more days until Christmas.
But we are going to enjoy ourselves.
So please, promise me that you will at
least try to make an effort to be nice to him.
Okay.
- Nobody is perfect, George.
- No. Except for you.
Oh, you're sweet.
Ugh, get a room, guys.
- Stewey, come. Stewey!
- Ted!
- Stewey, stop! I can't, I can't just...! Stop it!
- I can't get through! I can't get through! I'm trying!
- You, you broke it.
- I gotta go to the bathroom.
That's a closet.
Where's the bathroom?
It's down the hall.
Down the hall? You know when I get an anxiety, I gotta get up
in the middle of the night and I gotta go number .
There's no bathroom in here?
What am I gonna do?
Quit whining, you big baby.
It's the biggest job of our careers.
Once we sell that girl's necklace to Tony Rowe,
we can finally retire and open up that little ice
cream shop on the beach like we always talked about.
Really? I gotta go to the bathroom.
Get out of the way.
Just... Just... Just...
Hey, Ted. I thought you said we were gonna open up
a butcher shop on the beach. That's my dream.
I want a sliced diet bologna, garlic bologna,
meat bolonga. That's my dream. You understand me, Ted?
Now you're trying to tell me
it's some ice cream shop?
Stewey, you can do anything you want to
with your bologna, okay?
Really?
I gotta go to the bathroom.
(French accent)
There she is, my little mademoiselle.
You're not sleeping down here, are you?
It would appear all the rooms
have been claimed.
There's a shed in the backyard.
I don't know. That couch looks big
enough for two.
I'm sleeping on the couch,
you're sleeping on the floor.
Okay, that works too. All alone
on the cold floor with no one to pet me.
Ugh, here.
Good night, Bella.
Good night, Zeus.
Deck the halls with boughs of holly,
- Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la, la!
- We're you really a K- ?
Yep. Got a plaque and everything.
Savin' people is what I do.
Mmm, courage is such a turn-on.
Hey, watch out for that guy.
He doesn't like dogs.
Trooper: You got a problem, kid?
Kid? Who are you callin' kid?
My name's Trooper.
I'm an avalanche dog.
And this my mountain.
Oh, yeah? Says who?
Says me.
Calm down, Zeus.
Who's the babe?
Oh, that's none of your business.
What's the matter, Zeus?
Afraid of a little competition?
She's mine. I saw her first.
We'll see about that.
Now that's what I call a fox.
Ruff!
Keep your paws off my girl!
Catch you later.
Trooper out.
He is so hot.
What?!
Okay, so we've got our spa appointments.
So we'll see you in a few hours.
Spa? Can I come?
Too bad you guys are gonna
miss some k*ller-snowmobiling.
Ain't that right, Bella?
Please? Don't leave me here with the boys.
Well, we'd like to, Randy but...
You guys are going snowmobiling?
- more stars! Sheer mountain for missy! Isn't that right?
- That's right!
Can I go with Uncle Randy and Zack, please?
Ben, the whole reason we came here is to
spend a nice Bannister holiday together.
Yeah but the spa? Come on, Dad.
Please just this once.
Oh, I don't know, honey.
It sounds kinda dangerous.
We'll get him a helmet.
- Okay, fine. Go ahead.
- Thanks, Mom. You're the best.
- What?
- Have a good time.
- Bye.
Let them go. They'll be fine.
Just don't get lost, Ben.
That makes me nervous, Belinda. I-
Belinda? Okay.
Hey, could I get an autograph?
- Showtime.
- Showtime.
Ted, what's the plan?
Alright. London James wears that necklace
everywhere she goes, right?
Right.
Except where's the one
place she can't wear it?
A carwash.
No, you idiot. The spa.
You're a genius, you know that?
Alright, so we just wait until she slides inside,
maybe gets a massage, takes off the
necklace, we slide in... Boom! Steal it.
Beautiful.
Alright, let's just hope that
bodyguard stays outside.
Ted, let me tell you somethin'.
I don't want no complications.
When I get complications, I get an anxiety.
When I get an anxiety, I get gas.
I don't need this aggravation today.
Stewey, trust me. I got this.
I got this covered.
Come on. Follow me.
Santa Claus is on his way
In a sleigh
Hip hip hooray!
I can't wait for Christmas Day
Waiting for...
Zeus: Oh, yeah. Right there, right there.
Oh, you feel that spot? All that tension?
Oh, right there. Oh, yeah. Oh.
Miss James, welcome.
I'm so glad to see you here.
We have all kinds of massages.
What kind would you like?
What do you offer?
We have a wonderful Swedish massage.
I'll have that.
Okay. Lie, down, relax,
and I'll be right back.
She's gone. Come on, come on.
Come on!
Hey! You're not the masseuse!
I'm back.
You're so tense.
What are you doing with her purse?
Hurry up!
(farts)
Uh, do you like that smell?
It is the Swedish oil.
Ah, I hope you are enjoying this.
(farting)
Gross!
My stomach.
Hurry up!
Do not lift your head because
the Swedish will throw your spine.
Ah! London! The help is
stealing your necklace!
Hey! Hans! Hans, they
stole my necklace!
Wait for me!
They went that way.
Ted, if we go back to
the slammer, I can't.
Hans! We got 'em!
- If we don't have it on us, they can't get us.
- Ted, I'm tellin' you right now. They're gonna get us.
Freeze.
Hey.
You boys mind if we check your pockets?
- No, go right ahead.
- No. I don't have no diamond necklace.
Yeah, we heard somebody said
something about a diamond necklace.
- Guard : This one looks clean over here.
- Guard : Yeah, this one's clean too.
- Go ahead, boys.
- Sorry about that.
Yeah, well, thanks. Hope you find it.
Are you gonna buy me
something nice, honey?
No, no, honey. This is all about Zeus.
Oh.
Okay, honey. So, let's find
your Christmas present for Zeusy, okay?
- Okay.
- Alright.
I think I'm gonna have to step on my game if I'm
gonna compete with Don Juan over there in the village.
Oh, yeah. Here it is.
Dog stuff is over here.
Alright. Let's look for
something nice for Bella, huh?
I'm tellin' ya, buddy. Girls love it when you get
a nice Christmas gift... for them. They love that.
What about this, huh?
No, I'm looking for something that
really says how I feel about her.
Okay, you know her better than I do.
Daddy, what's Zeusy doing?
Uh, we're looking for a Christmas
gift, honey. For Bella.
Oh, that's so sweet.
Let me help.
Okay, but Daddy knows Christmas gifts
for puppies better than everybody.
Hey, Zeus. Look at this.
Game, set, match.
Now we're talkin'.
Oh, honey. That looks very expensive.
No. bucks. They're all the same.
I'm sure she'll love it, Zeusy.
Yeah. Hey, Zeus. One problem.
You got any cash on you?
Uh, can you spot me, George?
Ahh. I got this one.
We are home free.
What are we gonna do now?
Simple. We wait 'em out.
Five more minutes, go walk in that store,
we buy a $ , necklace for bucks.
You always know how to make me feel better.
(chuckles)
Oh, look how cute. L...
Ted. Ted!
What?
Look! It's that family
and their mangy mutt!
This can not be happening!
What are the Bannisters doing here?
And what are they doing with our necklace?!
What are we gonna do now?
What do you think?
We're gonna get it back. Come on.
(chuckles)
I know, buddy. I know you're excited.
Here you go. Let's go get it. Come on.
Hello, anyone home?
Bella? Bella?
There you are. Did you have a
nice day at the spa?
I bought you a present.
You did?
Well, technically, George bought
it but I picked it out.
(gasps)
Oh my...
Now I know it's not Christmas yet
but I just want you to know
I've never felt this way about a girl before.
So, do you like it?
Like it? I love it!
Whew!
It's beautiful, Zeus. Thank you.
I'm gonna go show Randy.
Dude, was I right?
I'm tellin' ya. Every time I
give Belinda some jewellery,
she's all over me. Oh, yeah.
Hey. You know that old thing:
"Diamonds are a girl's best friend?"
Well, that works for hairy girls too.
Yeah, I think she likes you, buddy.
My little Zeus is growing up.
Yeah, you're growing up.
Yeah, yeah.
Good boy.
I hope so, George.
I really hope so.
Get down! Not so fast!
Usually you stake out!
Ted: Well, well, well.
Looks like our furry little buddy
got himself a girlfriend.
Stewey: Do you think he followed us here?
To Colorado? Are you an idiot?
Then what are they doing here?
It's destiny, Stewey. Fate.
Them being here on vacation, the dog, the necklace,
you and I out here having this conversation in the snow,
freezin' our berries off.
It's all meant to be.
Ted, you're starting to scare me, right?
Relax. It's from a book I read.
You read a book?
Yeah, I read a book in the joint.
Well, what does it mean?
There's gonna be a collision, Stewey.
An unstoppable force is about
to meet an immovable object.
Yeah.
Hey, am I the unmovable object?
No! We are the unstoppable force!
Think about it.
Not only are we gonna get our necklace back,
but we're finally gonna be able to get revenge on that
mangy mutt that made us spend last Christmas behind bars.
You always know how to make
me feel better, you know that?
That snow is yellow.
Now, let's go. Come on.
Let's go. Come on. Okay.
George, honey. You know it has
been since high school, hasn't it?
Since you've been on skiis?
Yeah, yeah but, uh, it's like
riding a bike, Belinda.
I mean, once you get on,
you just keep peddling, you know?
Well,...
Okay. Last one down is namby-pansy.
Love the competition, buddy.
(grunting)
Whoo!
Come on, Leslie! Keep up!
Whoa! Whoa!
Best Christmas
-Watch out, Ben!
Where's George?
Oh, I'm sure he'll be down any minute.
To the gondola!
- Yeah, let's go again! Come on!
- Yeah! Woo-hoo!
Ben! Where are you going?
Oh, boy, I hate this! I hate this!
I hate this!
Wait for me!
Whoa! Sorry, sweetie.
Whoa!
(panicking)
Oh, no! I don't believe this!
Oh my God! Oh, boy!
Oh, no!
- Try to pull yourself, Leslie!
- Oh, yeah. In your snow pants!
Best Christmas
Knew this Christmas time
Oh, there he is. There he is.
Daddy!
Uncle Leslie!
Oh, gosh. I hope he's okay.
Yeah, Christmas time
Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la
Yeah, Christmas time
Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la
Yeah, Christmas time
Fa, la, la, la, la, la, la
Zack: I did terrible on the snowboard today.
Ben: My dad's such a terrible skiier.
You know? You take up after him.
Belinda: Be nice, be nice.
Bella: I can't believe you
went skiing without us.
Zeus: George, you okay, buddy?
Randy: And here's our gold
medal winner for the day.
Oh, honey. How are you doing?
- Are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm gonna be fine.
You're okay. He's alright.
So, grapefruit? Egg-whites?
Neither. I'm gonna whip up some
world-famous George Bannister pancakes and bacon.
Did somebody say bacon?
Bacon? Eww, you got a lot to
learn if you're gonna be my man.
Ahh.
(laughing)
Bacon. No one eats bacon anymore.
It's the st century.
Come on.
I do! I do!
Yeah. Come on, Uncle George.
We're just looking out for your health.
Yeah, well, you know what?
My health is fine.
Sure.
Can I speak to you
for a second? Outside?
- Oh, sure. Okay.
- Now.
We'll be right back.
Honey, eat your melon.
Uh-oh, someone's gonna get "the talk."
(grunting)
Belinda, why would you let
him make us breakfast?
You said you wanted to spend the week relaxing.
- So,...
- Yeah, well, that was before the Ken doll showed up.
Oh, George.
Don't "Oh, George" me.
Is this really about bacon
or is this about Randy?
You can pick your swine.
Look, I- I know.
He can be a little pushy but it's only because he
really cares and he wants to do the right thing.
Yeah, well, he's getting on my last nerve.
- Don't let him ruin our vacation, okay?
- Okay.
- Okay. Oh, sorry, sorry.
- Neck! The neck.
Okay.
(grunts)
Jeez, I don't know what your problem is.
(chuckles)
What are you doing?
Buildin' a snowman!
I've never made a snowman before.
We don't have snow in L.A.
Oh, it's fun! All you gotta is start
packin' the snow together into a little ball.
This is fun!
(chuckling)
It doesn't really look like a man.
That's because we're not finished.
What are you guys doing?
What does it look like we're doing?
We're building a snowman.
Come play with us.
Oh, can I help?
- Kara: Okay.
- Sure.
(Karate yells)
Our snowman!
Oops.
You jerk!
What was that for?
Fix it!
- Make me.
- I will.
Get out of here!
Leave us alone!
Later.
It's okay, Kara. We can fix it.
Come on.
(Kara laughing)
Come on, Bella. Come on,
Zeus. Here, boy. Come here.
Ted: Get behind a tree.
- Stewey!
- What?
Get behind a bigger tree!
Stewey: It's alright. They can't see me.
Come over here, behind me!
There's the necklace. Right there.
How are we gonna get it?
Simple. We wait till the family's distracted
then, we lure the dogs over here,
then, we snatch the necklace.
How are we gonna lure them in?
Easy, what does every dog love?
Mailmen.
Besides mailmen?
Meat.
Meat. Steak.
Yeah, I like steak too.
This is for the dogs, Stewey.
I saw a butcher shop in town.
We'll go grab a steak, lure it over,
snatch the goods, we're gone.
Can I throw a snowball before we leave?
No!
(car approaching)
Okay, kids. Who wants to
go cut down a tree?
- Me!
- Me! Come on, guys!
Come on, come on!
It's Christmas time of year
Everybody swing and...
Dad, how much further?
Yeah, George. It's getting late.
It's right here, Belinda.
I can feel it.
'Cause everybody here
loves Christmas
Let it go, let it snow!
Ho, ho, ho!
Hand me the axe, Ben.
Dad, why can't we just
get a tree from the lot?
Because we're gonna do it the old-fashioned
Bannister way. Like I did when I was a kid.
Oh, boy.
We're gonna drive to the middle of nowhere
and look for that perfect Christmas tree.
Even if it kills us, Daddy?
Even if it kills us, honey.
Alright, Zeus, Bella!
I don't know why I let
you talk me into coming.
Because when's the last time you
got to cut down a Christmas tree?
Let's go!
(George panting)
Dad, do we have to do this?
It's all part of the Christmas experience, guys.
It's very cold, George.
I'm too old for this.
Whoo! This is it!
This is the one!
Georgie, are you sure about this?
I don't know. Honey,
it looks a little big.
Are you sure you can handle that, Dad?
You know what, Ben? Stand back
and watch and learn.
Whatever that saying goes.
Let's give your father
some room, okay?
(screaming)
Oh. Geor...
Are you okay, Dad?
Yeah.
- Why don't we just take this one?
- I'm okay.
Belinda, you alright?
Okay.
Give me... Okay, honey.
It's alri... Ooh.
Hey, what's that over there?
Is that rib-eye?
(sniffing)
Here, doggie, doggie, doggie, doggie.
Are they looking at it?
They're looking. Go, go.
Here, doggie, doggie, doggie.
Zeus, where are you going?
Get back here!
Ted! I should've put some pepper
on this steak.
I like pepper on my steak.
Dogs like pepper.
Dogs don't like pepper!
Shh!
Here, doggie, doggie, doggie.
(growling)
Let's get out of here!
Is it there, Ted?
(wolves growling, snarling)
S-S-Stewey!
What?
Whatever you do, don't look behind you.
What do you mean don't turn around, Ted?
Don't look behind you!
Ted, I looked! Ted, I looked!
Ted, I'm gonna wet my pants! Ted!
- Okay, um... I read about this. Just freeze.
- Ted, what am I gonna do?
Be like a statue. Don't do anything.
(screaming)
Run, Stewey! Run!
Wolf : What's you got there, sirloin?
Wolf : Get your own!
Now that's a Christmas tree.
Way to go, Randy.
Yeah, we went out into the woods
and cut this bad boy down!
Wow! You guys really cut
that down yourself?
Hey, Ben! Come on over here and give
us a hand with this big old monster!
Ben! What are you doing?
(screaming)
Ben! Ben!
(grunting)
- Is George gonna be okay?
- Are you kiddin'? Stuff like this
happens all the time in this family.
You know, Ben. When I ask for some help,
I- I mean it, okay?
- Get out with the Christmas spirit.
- Honey, honey.
- Here, honey. Can you hold this a second?
- Um, okay.
Hey, that's so cute. You got a
Christmas tree for Kara.
Yeah, Uncle Leslie.
Nice Christmas twig.
I like it, Daddy. It's
little like me.
It's got personality, honey.
Yeah! Yeah.
They're just being kind.
Yeah, I don't know, Dad.
It's kinda small.
Well, this is the Bannister tree, okay?
So we can drop the comments right now.
Plus, in Taiwan, they have two
trees this size for Christmas.
They call it a Siamese Christmas.
So, how does that sound?
Okay, who wants some of Uncle
Randy's famous hot cocoa?
- Me.
- Both: I do.
Oh, it's okay. I got it, Daddy.
Okay.
Hey, George.
(muttering)
You know what? I'm, I'm gonna go
for a walk. I'm gonna walk this off.
It's okay, George.
I still like your tree.
Oh, boy
Well, it's Christmas time again
- How old are these?
These are from when Aunt Belinda
and I were little.
They are. Do you remember these?
We made these in the th grade.
It's pretty, Mommy.
Boy, you guys are taking a long
time to decorate this tree.
Mine was done in minutes.
It's a -minute tree.
Hey, who's this?
Oh, that's George when
he was a little baby.
Good-looking kid, huh?
Yeah, I know. He, he looks
a little feminine
but he was very pretty.
You know, real handsome kid.
Yeah.
You know, I actually
chopped my tree down.
I used an axe.
Real men use axes.
Okay, let's light
these puppies up!
You ready, Leslie?
I am in the holiday spirit.
Kara, honey. You wanna
do the honors?
Oof. Gah. Tough break, Randy.
Kara, are you sure you, uh...?
Yeah.
I- I don't understand.
I double-checked everything. Twice.
Did I forget something?
Hey, Dad.
Check this out.
Odd.
You wouldn't happen to know what
happened to the missing bulb, would you?
Me?
(chuckles nervously)
Well, I got a spare somewhere.
You know, they got spare
ones in, uh, Africa.
I can get you a little
plane ride there.
Always the kidder, Leslie.
Always the kidder.
Bingo.
- Hey! Hey, Merry Christmas!
- Hey!
Wow! It's so bright!
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
Well, look at that.
(chuckles nervously)
I was saying Africa that
all along was right there.
You are so busted.
Dad, I can't believe you.
I...
You sabotaged my tree.
No, I- I- I was.. I was
trying to set it up earlier.
You know. I'm not an electrician.
I don't know how these things go.
Honey, you believe me, right?
Ben?
No, George. No.
Alright, let me explain.
You don't have to explain, Leslie.
I know exactly what's going on.
And it's been going on since the
moment you walked into that door.
I intimidate you. You feel some need
to try and outdo me at every turn.
Wait, wait, wait.
I try to outdo you?
You, you kinda do, George.
Alright, let's settle
this once and for all.
Okay, okay. Come on, boys.
Play nice. Kids...
We're not gonna fight.
We're not?
Snowball battle. Tomorrow.
Snowfort. High noon. You man enough?
I don't... No,
I don't think so. No.
Yeah, yeah. I think I am.
You better get your rest, Leslie boy.
You're gonna need it.
Zack! Bella! w*r room meeting!
In the basement! minutes!
Yes, sir.
- Good going, Dad.
- Yeah, good going.
Oh, George.
(snidely) "High noon."
Hey, kid. Can you throw snowballs?
Sure, I can!
You're on my team, alright?
Okay.
George? You know, we really
don't have to do this.
Yes, we do, Belinda.
Yeah, Dad. Can't we
just like go tubing?
Yeah, Dad.
Kids, once and for all, we're gonna
show your uncle
who's boss.
Oh, boy.
Don't throw a snowball until
the whites of their eyes.
Let 'em have it, boys!
Get 'em! Get 'em! Now!
(laughing)
Bombs away!
Get 'em, Bella!
Aim low! k*ll 'em all!
Take that!
Ahh. (sniffing)
Stewey.
Look at that fort.
I wanna go play.
Stewey, no, no! Stewey! Come on!
We're here to get the necklace, okay?
No playing!
Sotherby: And this gondola will
take you to the other peak.
(cellphone ringing)
- You can see over here... Uh, uh...
- London: Yeah, I'm here. This is for the...
- I wish I would've gotten a nice skii suit too.
- Steal your own. I'm a chameleon. I blend in.
Figure it out.
I would've been more aerodynamic
with a skii suit.
You will never be an aerodynamic, Stewey.
(children laughing)
See that right there?
- Yeah.
- Alright.
Hey, look!
Another dog.
So what?!
So what? That's the black one. And there's
the other one with the big, French poodle.
How many dogs do I have
to deal with today?
I thought you got over your doggie.
I did! But there's
too many dogs!
Alright, look. Forget the dogs.
We go down there, we get the necklace, we're back
on the gondola before anybody even sees it!
Beautiful.
Hans: Hey, you guys!
Stewey, go, go! Stewey!
Hit 'em between the eyes, Kara!
George, don't tell her that!
Hey, what, what are we gonna
have for dinner tonight?
I think maybe some rigatoni.
Oh, I've had that a lot.
- You like that? Okay.
- Yeah. Alright, let's get back out there.
Bannister. On three. , , .
Bannister!
Okay.
Woo-hoo! Oh! Ow!
Whoa!
(groaning)
- Stewey! Grab one!
- What?!
Ah!
Ah!
Ah! You're a lot.
Okay. Come on, Stewey.
(panting)
(shouts in victory, then agony)
Stop! Stop!
Stewey!
(screaming)
I'll get you!
Ah! You're a lot.
Okay, come on.
(panting)
Got ya, suckers!
Hey, Randy! Woo!
Oh my God! What a shot!
I'm so sorry, honey.
I was aiming for Randy.
This is ice.
You need to be more careful.
I- I didn't know it was ice.
It's just a game, you know.
- Yeah, Dad. It's just a game.
- Yeah, Dad. What's wrong with you?
Yeah, Uncle Leslie!
Come on. Let's get you back to the condo.
Wow! Trooper was just telling me how
he saved people from an avalanche.
Isn't he brave?
Yeah, yeah. He's a regular super dog.
What is going on here?
What's it look like?
Bella, I thought you were my girl.
Zeus, I never said I was anyone's girl.
What did I tell ya, kid?
But... but I don't understand.
I mean, all the time we spent together.
Zeus, you're a good friend but
I never said we were more than that.
I'm sorry if you got the wrong idea.
Looks like she doesn't feel the same
way about you as you feel about her, pal.
I see. Well, I guess this
is the way it's gonna be.
Zeus, wait!
Guess I'll see you later.
Forget about him.
He's a washed-up K- .
Girl on TV: Come on,
Chappie, come on. You can do it.
Boy on TV: You're the greatest
dog of all.
Man on TV: Well, now let's
lead Chappie to the well
and he'll just use his horrible sense of
smell to pinpoint Sarah's exact location.
Ted: This means w*r.
Man on TV: You know what? You kids shouldn't
be playing around wells.
Anyway, we can do is drop Chappie down
the well with this rope I have here.
(Stewey sneezes)
Man on TV: All Chappie has to do
is get down to the well,
wrap the rope around Sarah's body,
then he'll just hoist her right up.
Hey, how are you feeling?
Oh, honey, honey. C-can
you turn that off, please?
Oh, honey. I- I wanted to watch the game.
Honey.
Okay. Alright. Yeah.
Hey, and can, can you adjust
a little on my feet here, please?
Uh, you know what, honey?
I'm just, uh, a little tired right now.
Honey!
Okay, okay.
Hey, Zeusy!
What's up, buddy?
What's the matter? You seem like
you're a little down.
No offense, George but... I don't
really feel like talking about it.
Trust me. I know exactly
how you feel, pal.
(phone ringing)
Honey, honey. C-can
you answer that, please?
Sure, honey. Sure.
Hello.
Annie: George, hi!
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas. How's everything
going with the dog-sitting?
Oh, it's going so great.
You know, the dogs are so well-behaved.
Yeah, even some of the neighbors
have come over to help out.
Oh, here's Millie!
Oh, it's George.
Mildred: Hi, George. You're
missing a great party.
Roscoe: Those cookies look delicious.
Oh, no, no, no. Honey.
No, no, no. Oh, you're gonna
spoil your dinner.
- No, help out.
- Roscoe, come on.
- Let's go and get you. There's kibble.
- Alright.
Oh, honey. How's it going?
Do you like the cabin?
Oh, yeah. Everything's
great here at the condo.
We, uh, absolutely love it. A little
shocking when we saw Randy and Zack show up.
We didn't expect that.
Randy and Zack are in Colorado?
They're in Colorado? I thought
they were in California.
Yeah, um, well, I- I guess he
had no other place to go.
Nowhere else to go? What are you,
what are you talking about?
He told me that Dottie was working
and that she was taking the girls with her.
Dottie had to work? That's
what he told you?
Chegwee: Shh. You're blowing it.
Yeah, why?
Oh, nothing. Nothing. You kn... You...
You.. You didn't hear anything from me.
Stop talking! You'll give it away!
Mom, what's going on with Randy?
Listen, um, we, we have a real problem here.
Yeah, uh, a Corgi took a Shih Tzu
all over the Persian rug.
You wish you had a Persian rug.
One of the, the dogs did a little, uh,
thing on the, the rug and it's a mess.
So, I'm gonna go and help Millie
clean up and everything, okay?
- I love you.
- Mom, Mom. What, what's going on with Randy?
- Merry Christmas. Bye-bye!
- Bye, George!
Mom, Mom! Wha... Merry Christmas.
I think I said too much.
Probably.
Well, that was your mother.
She said that Randy had nowhere
else to go. That's why he's here.
What?
Did he say anything to you?
Did he? Did Dottie take off?
I don't know. No, he
didn't say anything.
Well, something's up.
Hey.
- Oh, hey. Hey.
- Hey, how are you feeling?
That was a.. was a cheap
shot you took to the head.
Oh, oh, I- I'm okay. George just
doesn't know his own strength sometimes.
Yeah, I'm sorry, honey. I was
picturing a double-play and
kinda got away from me.
Well, uh, so, hey, um, listen, is
everything okay between you and Dottie?
Yeah, yeah. I mean, we're.. we're great. We're
great. Everything's great. Why? Why do you ask?
Oh, well, I just got a phone call
and we thought it was gonna be
Dottie and the girls wishing us
a Merry Christmas and it wasn't.
Maybe they'll call.
Yeah, maybe she will call.
You know what? She's probably
too busy working.
She's dedicated, you know.
Yeah. I'll tell you what.
Why don't we do this?
Why don't we make a phone call,
get her on speakerphone,
and then, we can all talk to her.
Okay, okay, okay.
You know what? It, it's late there. And
with the time change and everything, I...
Right, time change.
Yeah, sure. Where's that?
Plus, Dottie hasn't been
feeling well lately.
- Oh, oh.
- Yeah, and, uh, I don't wanna disturb her.
No.
Yeah, so she's not feeling well
or it's the time change? Which one, pretty boy?
- You know, you know I'm getting tired.
It's late and, uh, can I get you anything?
- Oh, no, no, no. I'm fine.
Alright, I- I'll see you in the morning.
- Okay. Alright.
- Alright.
George!
- What?
- What are you doing?
I'm not doing anything. He's
telling a good old Christmas fib!
That's what's going on here!
We're gonna jump
Jump this joint
We're gonna jump
Jump this joint
We're gonna jump
Jump this joint
We're gonna jump
Jump this joint
We're gonna jump
You're gonna jump
We're gonna jump
You're gonna jump
We're gonna jump this joint tonight
Oh, just jump this joint, baby
Give me those.
Stewey: Here you go, Captain.
Don't call me "Captain."
You said not to call you "General."
Don't call me anything.
Alright. Here's the plan.
We go inside, we swipe the
keys to their condo,
steal back our necklace.
How are we gonna do that?
I got a plan.
You said you got a plan last time,
I ended up in the slammer for a year...
Stewey! I got a plan.
Here is your map. You're
staying in Room .
- Here are your keys and this condo's keys.
- We do?
Good. Um, well, you can give them
to the bellhop and I'll be right back.
Go!
That was the bus route.
We can go around the river.
Do you need any help with your luggage?
Uh, no. I just have a small bag right...
Honey, did you see my bag?
It was right here.
Let's see what we got.
We got some loot in there!
Alright. This will go for me right here.
No.
Yes.
- Ted, I'm not puttin' that on!
- Stewey, yes!
Ted, no!
Come on, let's get changed.
Ted, no! Last time I did that,
it didn't work out, Ted.
(clears throat)
I'm not doing this.
Stop it! Stop it, Stewey!
(farting)
Shh. Get up, get up! Get up,
get up, get up!
She's so klutzy.
Stop! Relax!
- You also have...
- Tell me the truth. Do I look fat in this dress?
S... Yes, you look fat in that dress.
Now shut up and follow my lead!
And how long will you be staying with us, sir?
Ah, just tonight.
Excellent. Here are your keys.
This is a map.
You'll be staying in Cabin at
the sanctuary part of the lodge.
If you just head out this way, go to
the left, you'll find a tram waiting for you.
Does the cabin have a hot tub?
Yes, it does. Two, in fact.
One in the master bath
and one outside.
Excellent.
Yes, how can I help you?
Hi, we would like to rent the honeymoon suite.
Congratulations! And if I do
say so myself, you are a... a lovely couple.
(falsetto) Thank you.
(clears throat)
Thank you very much.
(Taps on keyboard)
Oh, I'm sorry. I'm afraid
everything's booked to the New Year.
(gasps)
Oh, sorry, honey.
Um, perhaps you would have another
recommendation? Another lodge nearby?
Yes, there's the storybook lodge,
just up the street.
Great. Would you happen to have a
card or the address or phone number?
The concierge does. I'll be right back.
Thank you so much.
Go ahead.
(dings bell)
Shh.
- They got a bell.
- Shh. (muttering)
Here you are.
Really appreciate it. Thank you so very much.
Absolutely. Merry Christmas and...
congratulations.
For what?
(falsetto) For what?
(chuckles nervously)
Sorry, she's European.
Toodle-oo.
- Au revoir.
- Au revoir.
Must be from California.
"And the stockings were hung
by the chimney with care."
That's really boring, Dad.
Honey, I read this to you every Christmas.
Yeah, and that's why it's boring.
Ted.
You packed my bikini?
No! Come on!
Right there.
Hey, who are you guys?
(shushing)
What do you think you're doing?
Coming in here?
- Oh, treats! Yum! Mmm.
- Yeah, yeah. Shh.
Alright, now, you guys know we're
not gonna open up the gifts today.
We'll open them at Christmas.
It's not the Bannister way.
Hey, who wants hot cocoa?
- I do.
- Me.
- Yeah, yeah.
- You know it.
- Get your hands off me, buster!
- Easy.
I am not that type of girl!
Ugh.
It's stuck!
This. Look. This one? This.
Stewey!
- How did you do yours, sweetheart?
- Good.
Zeus: You?! What the...?!
(muffled screaming)
George! George!
Look up there! Look up there!
- Come on! Up! Up! Come on!
- Bella: Zeus! Help me!
(Zeus barking)
Where are you taking me?
Bella, what's going on?
(muffled screaming)
Alright.
(chuckling)
Bella, I'm coming!
Alright, Stewey. Run, Stewey.
(Zeus barking)
Kara: Daddy, what's Zeusy doing?
George: You know what, honey?
I'm a huge Chappie fan
and he's trying to tell us something.
Randy: What's all the commotion?
I think Zeusy needs our help.
Come on.
(Zeus barking)
Zack: Bella?
Ben: She must've run out the door.
Come on, George. You gotta
help me find Bella.
(panting)
Come on, Stewey. Almost there.
I'm warning you.
- Zeus is a trained K- .
- Come on.
- I can't feel my legs.
He's gonna come looking for me
and when he does,
you're gonna be so sorry!
- Come on now. Here we go. Mush, mush.
- Ted, wait.
- Bella! Bella!
- Bella! Bella!
All: Bella!
Zeus: Bella!
Bella, are you out there?
Bella, bark if you can hear me!
Uh, George, loosen up on
the grip there, buddy.
Bella!
Let's go that way.
Bella!
Dad, we checked the whole house.
She's gone.
Are you sure?
She's nowhere to be found.
Call the National Guard!
Send out a search team!
We're wasting valuable time!
Okay. Official Bannister emergency.
Bella's missing.
Belinda: Should I call the resort?
I can't believe that my baby's out there
all alone in the freezing cold.
Don't worry, Uncle Randy.
We're gonna find her. We have to.
Somehow, I get the feeling
that it's all Jupiter's fault.
His name is Zeus! How many times
do I gotta to tell you?
All I'm saying is I shouldn't have let my
little princess play with that junkyard mutt.
That "junkyard mutt", might I add, is a
highly-trained, successful, K- specialist.
Okay, honey. I think by now, everybody
knows that he's a trained K- .
Come on, guys. This isn't getting us anywhere.
We need to be out there,
finding Bella. Not fighting.
I never resent that statement.
Okay, Leslie.
If he's such a trained K- , how
come he couldn't find Bella?
Because he's not trained to find fluffy Poodles,
and what did I tell you about calling me Leslie?
Oh, you wanna make something of it?
You know what? I'm sick of your
kind of setting attitude!
Ever since you've been here, you
think you're better than everybody else!
And I'm not the only one who thinks it either.
George, George!
He's got very high blood pressure. I...
What's that supposed to mean?
Why don't you tell everybody
why you're really here, Randy?
What are you talking about?
I'm talking about the fact that
your wife left you with your kids
and you have nowhere else to go
and that's why you're here!
- You weren't even supposed to be here!
- I guess I'm the only one that's gonna do something about this.
I'm gonna rescue Bella and
I'm gonna save Christmas vacation.
- Come on, Randy. You know exactly what you've done!
- Mom, Zeusy just ran away!
- Honey, honey. Be quiet, honey.
Okay, both of you, start acting
like adults right now!
Mom, Zeusy just ran away!
Come on.
What is this? Where am I?
Move over. Let Uncle Stewey
teach you how it's done.
Hey, what do you think you're doing?
Come on, what's takin' so long?
I can't get it. It's stuck.
I thought you said you used to work with jewelry.
I did work with jewelry but I used to rob it.
- Not pick watches or whatever this is.
- Someone special gave that to me. Stop!
We're stickin' out here like a sore thumb.
Let's do it inside. I'll
grab the mutt. Come on.
- Alright, princess. Get the door.
- What are you doing?
Put me down.
- I said put me down.
- Come on.
- Help!
- Get the door.
Somebody, please!
- I've been dognapped! Call !
- Get the door! Come on.
- After you, Captain.
Let me get this straight.
This dog disappeared and then
this dog went to find him?
Her. Went to find her.
Yeah.
Look, it's Christmas Eve.
One of the busiest days of the year.
I have over , people coming
to skii on the mountain today.
Not to mention the fact that we're
still looking for a $ , necklace
that was stolen from one of our most valued guests.
Well, listen here, Sotherby.
We are not in the hotel business.
So, we don't know how crowded it gets, okay?
We just want you to get these
pictures out to your staff.
I just... I don't know what you expect me to do.
(dings bell)
(yelling)
Look! My wife left me,
she took our daughters with her!
Alright, I have no place to live,
Bella is one of the last things
I have left in this life,
and I don't want anything to happen to her!
Would you mind letting go of my collar?
I'll see what I can do.
He got the point.
(sniffing)
Oh, which way now?
I've gotta use my K- skills
and case the area for clues.
Oh, I know it's here somewhere.
Come on, clues.
(sniffing)
Bingo!
Have no fear, my love!
Zeus is comin' to the rescue!
Zeus and Bella have to around here somewhere.
Stop, there's some tracks.
- Where?
- There.
That could be anything. Deer,
goat, one of those, uh, mountain cats?
Well, maybe we should check anyhow.
(sighing)
Hey, man.
I really didn't mean to out you.
It's okay, George.
I guess I had it coming.
Y-you know, we are family.
We're, we're here to help. I don't
know why you didn't say anything.
I didn't wanna ruin Christmas.
So what happened?
Dottie thinks that, uh,...
that I'm selfish, self-absorbed,
pompous, rude,...
She didn't say "egotistical"?
I mean, that too.
Yeah. Thought so.
- We should actually...
- She says I'm...
She says I'm trying to be...
(crying)
She says I'm trying to be something that I'm not.
(crying)
She says... Oh my God!
I'm broke, I'm up to my neck and then...
We got into shoes fight,
and I said some things.
(crying)
Hey, buddy?
I'm... really uncomfortable with you
hugging me in the wilderness.
Yeah. Yeah.
You know what I'm sayin'?
Yeah.
Did you at least apologize?
Not yet.
I wrote some things down.
(crying)
What's the use? She said we're done.
All I wanted was...
Let's, let's look for the dogs.
So I think we should start our search this way
then maybe continue around...
Oh my God! A bear!
What?! What?! Where?!
No, no, no, no. No, it's not..
I think it was just, uh, it might have
been some... leaves rustling.
Ted: Unbelievable!
- Stewey: I'm hungry, alright?
- Biggest job of our career and
you gotta go out and eat.
Ted, we haven't eaten since morning time.
Just get the necklace off the dog.
You know what? I..
- I don't even have the strength either.
- If you don't get it done like that, I will do it myself.
(gasps)
Zeus: Oh, no! Not Bella!
We'll go over to Goldberg's,
they got some shrimp and lobster sauce,
a little broccoli beef, get some twice
curved pork, a little white rice...
Bella! Bella!
You in there somewhere, Bella?
Hold on, I'm coming!
Bella! Bella, where are you?
Bella!
Oh, she's got to be in one of these rooms.
Bella, are you there?
Bella: Zeus, in here!
Hold on! Hold on! I gotta
get this door open!
- Oh
- Oh, thank goodness you're here.
Don't worry, my love.
I'm here to save you.
These guys are dangerous.
You better call the police.
I am the police, baby. I'll
have you out in no time.
- Zeus, hurry!
- I gotta get this cage open.
Ugh, I'll be right back.
Oh, don't leave me.
Oh, come back!
Where should I look? Where should I look?
Ooh, ooh, the kitchen!
Think, think, think, think. There has to
be something I can use to pick that lock.
(sniffing)
Ooh, is that a fillet?
Ooh, maybe he can help.
- Stewey: Ted, why did you get the light soy sauce?
- Ted: Shut up about the soy sauce!
Excuse me, do you have something to open a lock?
Get outta here, you mangy mutt!
No dogs in the kitchen! Get outta here!
Ugh, rough crowd.
Okay, there's gotta be something
around here somewhere.
Come on, come on.
Ooh, there it is!
Now we're talkin'.
Get out of here. Let's go.
Uh-oh! Here they come!
Ahh.
(whistling)
Ugh, ugh.
(crashing)
Stewey! Get off me!
(farting)
Zeus: Eww! Gross!
Where's my eggroll?
What's wrong with you?
Damn!
Let's go!
Oh, boy. Here we go again.
Right around there.
Oatmeal, huh?
(grunting and speaking with mouth full)
This is heavy.
And right around here.
Perfect.
This'll make 'em chill out.
That oughta do it.
Time to say "Christmas Vacation."
Randy: It's freezing cold out there.
How long can they last?
George: They're canines. I mean,
they're built for this.
Still gotta find them.
They couldn't have gone this far.
Hey, what's the matter, huh?
You want some food? You hungry?
Forget about it.
You get nothing! Nothing!
Bella: Ugh! You're disgusting!
Stewey.
What?
What did I tell you about
eating with your mouth full?
It's spittin'. It disgusted me.
Let me get some mushu, will you?
No.
Come on. Just a little bit.
This'll get 'em out of the room
so I can free Bella.
(police siren wailing on TV)
Cop on TV: Captain, I called some squads.
What's the situation?
Captain on TV: We got a...
I'm not goin' back to jail!
How did they know we were here?
I'm not goin' back! I can't go back!
Nobody's going back to jail.
This time, I came prepared.
(taser buzzing)
Taser . Let's do this.
I'll hide in here.
Ted, I'm gonna get 'em!
(screaming)
(crashing)
Ted!
It's that dog.
Stewey!
Get me out of this!
This is yoga time stand
getting me out of this!
Come on.
- Ahh!
- Let's go.
Come on, come on.
(grunting)
Let's see if we can catch him outside.
Come on!
I'm gonna check over here.
Up here.
Bull's-eye! Ha, ha, ha, ha!
It's that dog!
These two aren't gonna give up. Ugh.
There! There he is, Stewey!
Get him! Get him!
Take a chill hill, guys.
(screaming)
Bella, I'm coming.
Get that dog!
- Stand back, Bella.
- Hurry, Zeus.
(grunting)
I'm gonna taser that mutt!
Oh, after you, my dear.
(chuckling)
Thanks, Zeus.
Ooh, that feels good. Thank you.
(panting)
Come on, let's get out of here!
Quick, quick!
Oh, the other way!
Gotcha!
(laughing)
(Zeus and Bella barking)
Whoa, whoa! No, no.
-You and your girlfriend can't get through anywhere, buddy.
- Oh, no! We're trapped!
Come on.
(Zeus and Bella barking)
Where are you going? Where are you going?
Where are you going?
Oh, no, no. I don't think so.
I don't think so. This is for you.
You've caused enough havoc!
I'm comin' to get ya!
Sit, sit, stay, stay, stay, sit down!
Let's see how you like this muzzle, Zeus!
(taser buzzing)
(laughing evilly)
Kara: Mommy, they're gonna find Zeusy, right?
Belinda: Oh, of course, they are, sweetheart.
Zack: I don't know, Aunt Belinda.
That forest is huge.
I know.
Hey, guys.
We looked everywhere.
I'm sorry.
It's gonna be okay.
(grunting)
You have messed with us for the last time, mutt.
You and your girlfriend are toast.
- Ted, do you think once we get down,...
- I'm scared, Zeus.
Don't worry. I'll think of something.
I hope so.
- That's right.
- You serious?
Yeah.
Well, you can have a Chihuahua
when you get to Mexico, alright?
What are you talkin' about?
(Trooper barking)
Trooper: Hey!
Ted.
Leave my friends alone!
Trooper?
- Oh.
- Whoa.
- The taser!
- Stewey!
Ted! My heart, Ted! My heart! Ted!
(taser buzzing)
Ted, my heart!
Both: Thanks, Trooper.
- My heart! My heart!
- Stewey, I'll help you.
Come on! Stewey!
I've been thinking things
over and you know what?
If she's so important to ya,
I'm not gonna let anything get in your way.
Sotherby: What do you mean Trooper's missing?
Find him!
I have another call.
Keystone Resort & Spa.
Yes, sir. This is, uh, George Bannister
and we're calling in regards to
the status of our missing dogs.
Nothing yet, Mr. Bannister.
I promised to let you know
as soon as I find something.
Oh, okay. Very good. Thank you.
Bye-bye.
Uh, he said nothing yet but he's,
he's very helpful.
Mom, there has to be something we can do.
Ben: I don't wanna sit here anymore.
It's Christmas Eve and they're all alone.
That's it.
How can this be a family vacation with
two of our members out there all alone?
A family sticks together.
I'm going out there
and I'm gonna search every inch
of this resort inside and out
until I find Zeus and Bella.
Who's with me?
I am.
I'm with you.
I'm with you, Dad.
Me too.
Both: Let's go. Come on.
Stewey: Step on it, Ted!
They couldn't have gotten too far!
(panting)
Bella: Zeus, we'll never outrun them!
Zeus: Hey, what's that over there?
A sleigh! Maybe we can hitch a ride!
Ted: Where are you, you mangy mutt?
- Stewey: There they are, Ted! Right there! Right there!
- Ted: Ah, there he is! There he is!
Come on! Go get 'em,
Stewey! Get 'em!
(laughing)
Let's get 'em!
(yelling and grunting)
Stewey! Whoo!
Get up! Come on, Stewey!
Faster! Faster!
Ooh, this way, Bella.
I'm going as fast as I can.
Come on, Stewey! Let's go!
We gotta.. Come on!
(grunting)
London: No, I can't find the necklace.
No one here can seem to find it.
Excuse me. I was wondering if
we might be able to get a lift?
Missy: Where did you get London's necklace?
Those guys chasin' us stole it
and we're tryin' to stop 'em
from gettin' it back.
Ahh! Quick, stop this wagon!
- Driver : Whoa.
- Driver : Whoa? Why are they stopping?
Driver, why are we stopped?
Driver : I don't know.
Thank you.
... we're stopped here.
London! London, look!
They have your necklace!
Mommy's on the phone, sweetheart.
Explain yourself!
It's a long story but we need
to get back to the village.
Oh, no! They're gaining on us.
We need to go now!
Driver!
Elroy, Jake, let's go!
Elroy: Hold on to your heads.
(horse neighing)
Ha! Let's go! Giddy-up!
Oh, we're losing them!
Those horses are faster than
the ones they got at the track.
You know what? Forget it.
We're never gonna catch 'em.
They're headed to the village.
I know a shortcut. Come on.
Where?
This way!
It's no use. We looked everywhere.
They have to be out here somewhere.
Where's the one place we haven't checked?
All: The village!
Jake: End of the line. The village
is right there through those trees.
Thanks, buddy.
Don't mention it.
Ladies first.
Aww. What a cute couple.
(panting)
I know the way home!
Follow me!
Uh-oh! Ugh! Come on, Bella!
We gotta go!
(laughing)
Bella: Help us!
Zeus: Someone call security!
Ted: Come on! You can't outrun me, mutt!
(laughing)
His name is Zeus!
Stewey: All we want is the necklace!
(panting and grunting)
Zeus, why are you stopping?
Okay, time to end this once and for all.
- Cowabunga!
- No! No!
(screaming)
- Oh, no.
- Ah. Ah.
- Randy: Bella! Bella!
- Zack: Bella!
- Okay, okay, okay, ow, ugh, aah!
- Ah, ah.
Hey, these are the crooks from the spa.
Way to go, Stewey.
Kara: Zeusy!
London: My necklace! Oh, you
found my necklace! Thank you.
Don't thank me. Thank Zeus.
He's the hero.
All in a day's work.
Belinda: But, but that's Bella's collar.
George: Officer, there's some kind
of a misunderstanding here.
That's a $ dog collar.
Officer: It's a quarter of a
million dollar necklace, my friend.
(giggling)
Wait, no reward? How about an autograph?
My hero.
Does this mean, you know,
that you and me...?
A lady wants to be asked.
Bella, would you, um,
be my girlfriend?
Zeus, I would love to!
You know, Ted?
He really is an unstoppable force, Zeus.
No, he's an immovable object.
We're the unstoppable force.
Not anymore.
Man, those guys look familiar.
Didn't they try to rob our house last year?
Let's go. Let's go.
Yeah. Let's go home and have a
nice Bannister Christmas Eve dinner.
Yay. You've read my mind.
I'm starving.
Santa Claus is on his way
In a sleigh
Hip hip hooray!
I can't wait for Christmas Day
Zeus: Come on, wake up! Wake up!
It's Christmas morning!
George: Good morning.
Belinda: Kids, wake up! It's Christmas!
- Bella: Race you to the tree! Present time!
- Zeus: Yeah!
Zack: Presents!
Come on. Merry Christmas.
In a sleigh
- Merry Christmas.
Hip hip hooray!
Merry Christmas.
Santa came!
Waiting up for Santa
Ooh, Santa brought me a bone!
Randy: Share.
Ah, this is the best Christmas ever!
(doorbell rings)
Who could that be on Christmas?
Uh, honey, honey. Let, let Randy get it.
Hey, uh, Randy.
(doorbell ringing)
I think there's some carolers outside.
You mind grabbing that?
Ooh, I'll get it.
Thanks, buddy.
- What? Why are you...?
- Just...
- Girls: Dad! Daddy! We missed you!
- What? Hey, what are you doing here?
I missed you too! Oh!
George!
Come on in, come on in.
- Presents! Presents!
- Merry Christmas!
Bella: Wow! You made it!
Dottie: I've been doing a lot of thinking.
I don't wanna give up on everything
that we built together.
Can we just forget about everything we said before?
It's Christmas, we're a family,
and we should be together.
Randy: Get in here!
Merry Christmas.
- Hi.
- Hi. Merry Christmas.
Zack!
Mom!
Merry Christmas.
You didn't have anything
to do with this, George?
I might have read a couple of lines
from this little note that you wrote.
(chuckles)
Thanks.
No problem, buddy. No problem.
Just, uh, do me a favor. Just, uh,
take good care of them.
Oh, and by the way, you spelled "egotistical" wrong.
- You're welcome.
- Hey.
What?
- Guy thing.
- Okay.
Annie: George, that is wonderful news.
Oh, I am so happy.
Well, honey. You have a good
Christmas too, okay?
Oh, before you leave, would you
just make sure that you clean up the...?
Okay.
Millie: So, how are things in Colorado?
Well, apparently, George has convinced
my daughter-in-law to go back with my son.
- George did?
- Yeah.
And she flew up to see him this morning.
That's great. I mean, they're such a lovely couple.
They should be together.
I know.
You know, I think this going to
be a very, Merry Christmas.
It is, Annie.
(chuckling)
Except for the dogs.
(dogs barking)
Uh-oh.
Millie: Roscoe.
Annie: Oh, Roscoe, no! My tree!
Roscoe: Finally! It's mine!
Hey!
Sorry about the collar.
(chuckling)
It's okay. You're the best Christmas
present a girl could ever ask for.
Wanna hear a joke?
Sure.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?
Merry Christmas to you!
(chuckling)
Merry Christmas, Zeus.
George!
(screaming)
It's Christmas time of year
Everybody swing
And it's Christmas
time of year again
And the trimming's on the tree
Oh! Oh my God!
Let it go, let it snow,
Ho-ho-ho!
Well, it's Christmas time of year
With the presents on the tree
And it's Christmas
time of year again
(laughing)
- 'Cause everybody here loves Christmas
- Oh my goodness.
- Yeah!
Let it go, let it snow,
Ho-ho-ho!
Don't you know
T'is the season
Hang the mistletoe
Tonight feels like Christmas Eve
and I just cannot wait till tomorrow!
Well, it's Christmas time of year
Everybody swing
And it's Christmas
time of year again
And the trimming's on the tree
'Cause everybody here loves Christmas
Yeah!
Let it go, let it snow,
Ho-ho-ho!
Let it go, let it go,
Ho-ho-ho!
Let it go, let it go,
Ho-ho-ho!
Dog Who Saved Christmas Vacation, The (2010)
Moderator: Maskath3