[ Music ]
Isn't it great
When things turn out different
Than you plan?
Don't you hate it
When things don't go the way
You plan?
Like last tuesday.
Me and josh really wanted
To see this movie,
But first we had to go
To the dentist.
Drake and I were going
To catch a movie
After we got our teeth cleaned.
But the dentist tells me
His -year-old niece
Is in town.
But the dentist told me
My gums were inflamed.
And his niece
Is like crazy hot.
Inflamed and p*ssy.
So the dentist says to me,
"We'll clean your teeth
"Another day.
"Here's bucks,
Go show my niece a good time."
So the dentist takes
A sharp metal thing with a hook
And just starts digging
Into my gums.
So I take her
To this mexican place.
And then he sneezes
And accidentally pokes a hole
Right through my tongue.
Look at this.
Look at it.
And the waiter messed up
My lunch order,
So he gave me six burritos--
No charge.
All I wanted was to see
A nice movie.
I just thought I was going
To catch a movie,
But instead--
But instead--
I end up with a hot girl,
Bucks,
And half a dozen free burritos.
I spent three hours having
A sneezy dentist sew up
My tongue hole.
Yeah, things don't always
Turn out how you plan.
Things don't always turn out
How you plan.
[ Music ]
Pretty tight.
Yep.
No, we were not tight,
All right?
That was loose,
A little weak.
Oh, come on, man.
What's the problem?
The problem?
Man, you were two beats behind
The whole song.
You were playing in a minor,
Not in a seven,
And you, dude,
You're wearing a woman's shirt.
It's called a blouse.
It's my sister's, okay?
All my clothes were dirty.
Well, why would you wear
Your sister's clothes?
Dude, will you relax?
What are you so nervous about?
It's not like this
Is our first concert.
But it's our first time
Opening up for a band
Like the sparks, okay?
And the president
Of spin city records
Is going to be there,
So can we please get this right?
Hey, you got any sunblock?
What?
We're playing outside.
At night.
You just don't want to share
Your sunblock.
Drake.
Drake, guess what?
Dad's on--
Okay, what is all over his face?
Forget about it--
What's up?
Oh, you got to see dad on tv.
Why?
Walter's on tv every day.
He got a new hairstyle.
To compete with bruce winchell.
--And now moving on
To our five-day forecast,
You can count on nothing
But sunny days and clear nights
For today, tomorrow,
And monday, tuesday, wednesday.
Hey, if it's
A five-day forecast,
Shouldn't it really be called
A five-cast?
Get it?
Oh, dad.
Hey drake,
Why is there a bus
In your driveway?
Uh, that's not a bus.
Come on.
Step away from the window.
Yeah, there is a bus
In the driveway.
Oh, I wanted it
To be a surprise.
What?
I rented a bus
And invited a bunch
Of our friends over here
So you can all ride
To the concert together.
You did?
Seriously?
Yeah.
How'd you get a bus?
Getabus.org.
Oh.
Right.
Of course.
Look guys,
We got two hours
Till the concert,
Can we please rehearse our song?
All right, all right,
All right.
I'm going to head over
To the park
And make sure everything's
Set up right.
I'll see you guys there,
And don't be late, okay?
Yeah, yeah.
Go, dude, all right.
Gary!
Elaine?
Who's she?
His sister.
How'd you find me here?
Just give me my shirt.
Oh, come on, can't I just--
Now.
Dude, why do you have
A tattoo of a foot
On your chest?
I don't know.
* I never thought
* That it'd be so simple
* But I found a way
* I found a way
* If you open up your mind
* See what's inside
* It's gonna take some time
* To realign
* But if you look inside
* I'm sure you'll find
* Over your shoulder
* You know that
* I told you
* I'll always
* Be pickin' you up
* When you're down
* So just turn around
* Ooh
[ Music ]
Hey, hey,
There he is.
Rock star drake parker
And his band
Whose names I do not know.
Thanks, thanks,
Appreciate it.
Is that my shirt?
That's my shirt.
Hey, come on,
He needed a shirt.
Actually, it fits me
Pretty good.
So why didn't you give him
One of yours?
He wanted one with a panda
On it.
Just burn it
When you're done.
We'll start loading the stuff
On the bus.
Okay, people,
The bus leaves in forty minutes,
So you have that long to consume
Your snacks and drink
Some of josh's
World famous lime-ade.
His lime-ade tastes
Like mucous.
You watch--
This fern's going to be dead
By nightfall.
Hey, drake.
What's up, gavin?
Your mom's hot.
Dude.
How tall is she?
Like five-two?
Five-ten?
I'll measure her later
And let you know.
Don't forget.
Hey, helen.
Gavin.
Did you invite crazy steve?
I had to.
See, a couple of years back,
Crazy steve found out
That my niece was having
Her bat mitzvah.
And then he got upset
'Cause he wasn't invited.
So while we were all
In the temple,
Crazy steve showed up
And slashed everybody's tires.
The whole thing
Was a big bat mess.
That temple needs
Better security.
Oh, it's closed now.
Now it's a b.f. Wangs.
I love their moo shoo.
Well, who doesn't?
Hey, craig.
Eric.
Do me a favor.
Make sure
That this guitar
Gets into the--
Ow.
That's lucy,
My ex-girlfriend.
Josh invited my ex-girlfriend?
Well, yeah,
When we were
Going over the guest list,
Josh said you and lucy
Were still friends.
Well, we are,
But I invited carly.
I can't have
My current girlfriend
And my ex-girlfriend
At the same party.
Do you want the universe
To explode?
I mean, what am I going to--
Ow.
Christine?
Ow.
How many of my ex-girlfriends
Are here?
Just those two--
I hope.
Or else I'm going to need
Chest replacement surgery.
Megan.
What?
Okay, listen to me.
My girlfriend carly is going
To be here any second.
So?
So my ex-girlfriend lucy's
Right over there,
And my other ex-girlfriend
Christine just went
In the kitchen.
Wow, three stupid girls
In one house.
Listen, please just
Do me a favor
And keep them apart, okay?
Make sure they don't talk
To each other, all right,
'Cause I've got to concentrate
On this concert--
Hey, drake.
It's drizzling out.
Drizzling?
What do you mean drizzling?
It means a light rain.
I know what drizzle means.
But the concert's outdoors,
It can't be drizzling.
I thought
That doof weatherman
With the stupid hair
Said no rain.
Hey, that "doof"
With the stupid hair happens
To be my husband.
Oh, and that's my fault?
Dude, what if the concert
Gets rained out?
Oh, man.
Okay, listen.
Do not say that, all right,
'Cause this concert
Cannot get rained--
You're a nerd.
How do you stop the rain?
You can't.
Don't say can't.
The rain's got to stop.
Well, hang on,
Let me get the rain fairy
On the phone.
Hey, what up, people?
It's raining outside.
There is water falling
From the sky.
I know.
But you said clear skies.
I promise,
This rain's going
To blow over quick.
Are you sure?
Hey, I'm a professional
Weatherman.
[Thunder]
Oh.
What up with your hair?
What up with yours?
Touché.
It's touchh.
Hey, carly.
Oh, hey you.
Uh--
Yeah. Lucy,
Christine.
How goes it, drake?
It's been, you know--
Did you cut
Your hair different?
Uh, no.
Hey, you know, he did,
Didn't he?
Yeah, he did.
No, I got to talk to megan
About the onion dip.
Problem?
I told you
To keep them apart.
I know.
Then what happened?
I got them all together.
You are an evil,
Evil little girl.
Hey, look who's catching on.
Oh.
Craig, eric?
Would either of you guys
Like the last stuffed mushroom?
Sure, I love stuffed mush--
Back off!
I'll have that mushroom,
Mrs. Parker.
Do you see
What's going on here?
No.
My girlfriend is over there
Talking to two
Of my ex-girlfriends
And they're giggling.
I mean, why are they giggling?
Did you measure your mom yet?
Okay, you can't date my mom.
I think that's up to her.
[Phone ringing]
Hello?
Uh, yes, he is.
Walter, it's your boss.
Hello, mr. Galloway.
Uh, yes, sir.
Uh, no, I did not predict rain.
Well, i--but--all right.
He wants me to go downtown
And do a live weather broadcast.
Outdoors?
Uh-huh.
But it's pouring out.
Oh, he can't make you--
He's my boss.
I got to go.
Oh, dude, look at the rain.
This concert's
Not going to happen.
Hey, come on, man,
Don't say that, all right?
Do you know how important
This concert is to us?
Besides it's not even raining
That hard out.
Look, look,
I think it's letting up.
I kind of got wet.
I'll get a towel.
I'm telling you,
This concert's not going
To happen.
Oh.
What are you talking--
Hey, hey, hey.
Hey, hey.
Come on.
Come on.
We still have a lot of time
Before the concert starts
And walter promised
That this storm will blow over,
All right.
So let's just all calm down
Because i--
Oh, walter.
[ Music ]
Okay, everybody.
The dwp said
That the electricity
Could be out till tomorrow.
Oh.
I've never seen
A television set
You can power up by turning
A crank.
It's like voodoo.
Hey, I'll just adjust
The antenna and see if I can get
A signal.
Everybody, shh, shh.
Let's listen.
Let's now go
To walter nichols
In downtown san diego
On storm watch.
Mind if I stand here
Next to you?
I guess not.
Sweet.
There've been winds reported
At over miles an hour,
And as you can see, the rain
Is really coming down hard now.
It's actually hurting my face.
Hey, josh.
Josh, tell me
What's going on.
I'm being told
There's major flooding
All throughout san diego,
So everyone's being advised
To stay indoors
And off the street.
What else?
Um, uh.
I'm very wet,
And even my underwear
Is soaked through.
What happened to the picture?
You have to keep cranking it
And my arm's getting tired.
I'll crank it.
Hurry.
All right.
Yells at me--
Eats my mushroom--
Well, I guess
We're all stuck here
Till the streets unflood.
Doesn't matter anymore.
That was josh.
They canceled the concert?
The whole stage
Is under water.
My uncle's got a boat.
Yeah, well,
That's great, gary.
Why don't you climb
Into your uncle's boat
And sail off to moron island?
Hey.
[Laughter]
So, drake?
Completely.
No question.
So what were we talking
About here?
Oh, nothing.
Yeah, don't worry about it.
Yeah, just girl stuff.
Oh, 'cause, see,
I heard my name,
And then some giggling.
So what were we talking
About here?
Oh, drake,
Don't be insecure.
Yeah, you haven't changed
A bit, have you?
Same old drake.
Yeah, same old me.
You know,
So what were we talking
About here?
Can I please take a break?
You'll take a break
When dora finds her way
To the banana tree.
Come on, dora.
It's right over there.
[Speaking foreign language]
Come on.
Um, do you mind if we change
The channel for just a second?
I'd like to see what's going on
With my husband and the storm.
Of course, mrs. Parker.
Channel seven?
Yes, ma'am.
And I've been asked to report
That flash flood warnings
Have been issued
All throughout san diego
And surrounding areas,
Which include--
Ah, pardon me fellows.
I'm doing a live report here.
Seriously, would you mind
Stepping out of the sh*t?
Give us your shirt.
What?
We want your shirt.
And your coat.
Give us your shirt and coat.
No.
Why doesn't someone help him?
Yes, what's wrong
With people?
Here's lisa lillian
With part three of her expose
On artichokes.
Lisa?
Excuse me.
Do you mind if I go back
To my program?
Uh, sure, sure.
Can I rest for ten seconds?
Dora!
Well, whatever.
How are we going to--
Did you ever tell him?
No, you can't tell
A guy that.
Yeah, they freak out.
I know, you just got
To let them think they are,
You know,
Just keep them smiling.
Yeah, I've been there.
I've been way there.
Why are we squatting?
Shh, I'm trying to hear
What my girlfriend's talking
About with my ex-girlfriends.
I called my uncle.
He sold the boat.
Hi, I'm gary.
Gavin.
Okay.
Oh, would you guys
Get out of here?
Hey.
So gary's uncle sold the boat.
Really?
Yeah, so--
Just tell me
What you were giggling about.
Mom, the roof's leaking.
Oh, fantastic.
It's going to ruin the ceiling.
Why don't you just make drake
Go up on the roof
And fix the leak?
Good call.
Drake.
Come on, dora.
[Speaking foreign language]
You call yourself an explora?
Hey, there's a leak
In the roof
And it's going to ruin
The ceiling if we don't stop it.
Yeah, I don't do things
Like that.
Come on, look,
There's a tarp in the garage,
Just go take it up on the roof,
Put it over the hole,
Then weigh it down.
All right.
Okay, and be careful.
Okay.
Thanks.
Hey, craig.
Eric.
We got a serious leak
In the ceiling over there.
Oh, my.
Yeah, so my mom wants you
To go to the garage,
Grab the tarp,
Take it to the roof,
Put it over the hole,
And weigh it down.
But it's pouring rain.
What if I slip
And fall off the roof?
Ah, all right.
There's rope in the garage,
Tie yourself to the chimney.
You'll be fine.
But i--
Hurry.
Okay.
Come on, dora.
You're the one with the map.
Don't ask me.
May i?
Of course.
Channel seven.
I know the drill.
It's still raining.
They took my shirt.
My cameraman has gone home.
The camera is on the tripod,
And I'm alone.
I'm cold.
There is no restroom nearby,
And it's just awful out here.
Absolutely awful.
Walter nichols.
Channel seven news.
Just awful.
Oh, my poor baby.
Hey.
Hi, gavin.
Candlelight.
Kind of romantic.
I was thinking
When this storm's over--
Maybe we go to b.f. Wangs,
Split some moo shoo?
Aah!
What was that?
Help me!
Help me! Help me!
I'm in a predicament.
Drake told me to tie myself
To the chimney,
But it didn't work.
Hey, craig fell off the roof.
I'm eric.
I got to go help him.
Don't move.
[Laughter]
All right,
I can't take it anymore.
I want to know
What you guys were talking about
And why it made you giggle.
Drake, calm down--
Then told me what you guys
Are giggling about.
Well, you're
The current girlfriend.
Tell him.
Okay, we were giggling
Because we were talking
About guys who were good kissers
And we all agreed
That you're the best.
Yeah, but you know what,
I don't think that
That's--really?
Uh-huh.
You got serious lip talent.
It's true.
So I'm, like,
A really awesome kisser?
Oh, yeah.
Pretty much.
Yeah.
Wow.
So now that we told you--
Yeah?
Which one of us
Is the best kisser?
Huh?
Come on.
It's only fair.
Yeah, tell us.
Well, come on, would you--
Would you really want to ask me
When you could ask someone
So much more like ryan seacrest?
[Laughter]
Come on, dora,
It's right behind you.
[Laughter]
It broke.
The crank broke.
Great, now we don't even have
A little tv,
And we're all stranded here
With nothing to do.
Nothing to do?
What do you think people did
Before they had electricity
And crankable televisions?
Come on.
Now, I want all the females
In this room to do this.
Yeah, keep doing that.
Now boys, when they pause,
I want you to clap like this.
Yeah, that's nice.
Yeah, that's nice.
That's really nice.
Now, keep it doing that
And listen to this.
* Buddy you're a boy
* Make a big noise
* Playin' in the street
* Gonna be a big man someday
* You got mud on your face
* You big disgrace
* Kickin' your can
* All over the place
Sing it.
* We will
* We will rock you
Hey, sing it!
* We will
* We will rock you
* Rock you
Go drake.
* Buddy you're a young man
* Hard man shoutin'
* In the street
* Gonna take
* On the world someday
* You got blood on your face
* Big disgrace
* Wavin' your banner
* All over the place
* We will
* We will rock you
Hey, sing it!
* We will
* We will rock you
Take it, nerds.
[Laughter]
* Buddy you're an old man
* Poor man
* Pleadin' with your eyes
* Gonna make you some peace
* Someday
* You got mud on your face
* You big disgrace
* Somebody better
* Put you back into your place
* We will
* We will rock you
Hey, sing it!
* We will
* We will rock you
Uh-huh.
* We will
* We will rock you
* We will
* We will rock you
Do you know what it's like
For a guy
To have his girlfriend,
Talking to his two
Of his ex-girlfriends
And sharing fruit,
And giggling about a guy--
Well, it was me.
Whoo!
If this rain keeps up,
We'll have to build ourselves
An ark.
Ark?
I realize the reference
Is biblical.
Holy cheese.
I've never seen a rain this hard
In san diego.
Word.
[Bell dings]
04x08 - The Storm
Watch/Buy Amazon Merchandise
Series follows two teenage stepbrothers Drake Parker and Josh Nichols as they live together despite opposite personalities.
Series follows two teenage stepbrothers Drake Parker and Josh Nichols as they live together despite opposite personalities.