09x10 - Hollywood Or Bust

[bunniefuu]

♪ Heartbeat

♪ Why do you miss

♪ When my baby kisses me?

♪ Heartbeat

♪ Why does a love kiss

♪ Stay in my memory? ♪

ROOSTER CROWS

CHICKENS CLUCKING

CHICKENS CLUCK AGITATEDLY

Oh, baby.HE CHUCKLES

Look at 'em over there.

Come on, come on.CLICKS TONGUE

Now, what's your game?

I've just cometo look at your Marans.

The ones you advertisedfor sale, like.

Weren't thinking of nickinga couple, were you?

No.

You're that crony of Greengrass',aren't you?

Well, I know him, yeah.

BIRD CROWS

One thing I hate worse

than the sight of themis the sound of them.

POP MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO Oh, no.

Look at the time!I'm due at court in ten minutes.

That'll make you popularwith the bench.

Oh, thanks, Mike.

Mmm, you taste of egg and bacon.

Not to mention Cumberland sausage.

KNOCK AT DOOR

Come in.

MICHAEL SIGHS

Yes, sir. Can I help you?

I sincerely hope so, Constable.

Denzil Arcourtof Arcourt Film Productions.

We're in the area, hunting location.

Location?

For a feature film we hopeto be sh**ting around here.

Oh, I see.

Er, excuse me.Please, come in.

SWITCHES OFF RADIO

I take it, the police would haveno objections to that?

No, I shouldn't think so,Mr Arcourt.

So long as you give usplenty of warning

as to any public placesyou might be thinking of using.

But of course.

It may also be a good idea

to get in contact my sergeant,over at Ashfordly.

- And the name of the sergeant?- Craddock, sir.

Right.

BELL TOLLINGIGNITION TURNS OFF

DOG BARKINGSHEEP BLEATING

ASHFORDLY: Come on. Come on.

DOG CONTINUES BARKING

ASHFORDLY: Down, boy.

Come on. Come here.

Give it. Give it! Down, boy.

- I say!- Hello?

That dog of your happensto be upsetting my sheep.

Then find another fieldto put them in.

This is my land, Clegghorn.

If I choose to exercise my dogon it,

that's really none of your business.

Just so long as you realize,My Lord,

if it so much as sticks its noseover my boundary,

it won't be exerciseit'll be needing.

It'll be buryin'.

DOG BARKSHE CHUCKLES

HE GRUNTSOBJECT CLATTERS LOUDLY

Mr Greengrass!HE PANTS

What do you want?

I wanted to have a word with youabout those chickens I bought.

Oh, yeah. What are they?Pullets or what?

- No, they're Marans.- Marans?

Yeah, they lay the big brown eggs.

Oh, yeah. Them, yeah.

Anyway, I was gonna go into businessand get a couple more

and sell the eggs.

But my mam,she's allergic to the feathers.

Is she? There's only one thingfor it, then,

ain't there?- What?

You'll have to wring their necks

and resign yourself to havingMaran sandwiches for a fortnight.

I couldn't do that,not to Dusty and Shirley.

I know I'm gonna regret this,but why Dusty and Shirley?

Ah, right, well,

I've named one of them Dustyafter Dusty Springfield,

and the other one I've named Shirleyafter Shirley...

BOTH: Bassey.

Yeah. I knew I'd regret it.

Well, you'll just have

to wring your mother's neck, then,won't you?

I thought you might help me out.

What, me?I hardly know the woman.

No, I thought you might letmy chickens live with your chickens.

Aye, that's all right.So long as you realize.

What?

I need % of the profitfor board and lodging.

%?

Well, I'm negotiable.

CLAUDE SNORTS AND LAUGHS

What's he up to, do you think?

Well... Well, he's...

He's probably checkingfor subsidence.

Subsidence?

Well, don't tell me you didn't havethis place checked

by a structural engineerbefore you bought it, Oscar.

I mean, Aidensfield's riddledwith old pit shafts.

A pub not far from here wentdown like the Titanic one afternoon.

CLAUDE LAUGHS

Under the sheer weightof your slate, I should imagine.

Well, whatever it is,he's certainly dishy.

Oh, you think so, do you?

Andy! You're back!ANDY CHUCKLES

And just in time,by the looks of it.

Oh, it's good to see you.

So, can a fellow get a drink in hereor what?

- Pint of bitter, wasn't it?- Now you're talking.

And you'll be wanting the same room,will you?

ANDY: What else?

Right.

- So, have you missed me?- Now and again, I suppose.

In that case, perhaps I'd...

Perhaps I'd bettertake this back, then.

What is it?

Try opening it.You might find out.

BOX CLICKS OPEN

GINA GASPS

Oh, Andy!

It's gorgeous! Thank you.

GINA CHUCKLES

Okay, guv?

So far, so good.

Excuse me.

Well, thanks a bunch, Jackie!

Look, I'm just doing my job.

Yeah, that's probablywhat Pierrepoint used to say.

- Who?- The hangman.

"Just doing my job."

So, as I understand it, Mr Arcourt,

you'd like to film insideas well as outside the pub.

Ideally, yes, it's perfect.

Oh, and it goes without saying,of course,

that you'd be fully compensatedfor any dislocation involved.

Plus the usual facility fee.

We'd also be lookingfor accommodation locally.

You've come to the right placefor that, then, haven't ya?

That Jackie.Talk about going for the throat!

She's like a flaming wolverinein court.

Well, maybe she wasbending over backwards

to showthere was no favouritism involved,

her being married to a policeman.

Alf, she enjoysmaking you look stupid.

You can tell she does.

SNAPS FINGER Right, then, lads.

I'm expecting a visitfrom a Mr Denzil Arcourt

and his colleague Mr Carey,from Arcourt Films, shortly.

Arcourt Films, Sarge?

That's right.

Ooh! And when they get here,

I don't want any nonsenseabout autographs and such.

We don't want them thinking

we're a bunch of local yokels,do we?

All right?

Bloody hell.

CAR ENGINE STARTS

- Mike Bradley, Aidensfield Police.- I know who you are, Constable.

We've had a complaintfrom Lord Ashfordly

that you threatened himwith a shotgun earlier today.

You're being misled, Constable.

The only one I threatenedwas that dog of his.

If it came anywhere near my sheep.

He also tells methat when you issued this threat,

he was, in fact,on his land, not yours.

Land that, for the record,

is separated from mineby just one boundary wall.

A wall that your average Springerwould clear in about one second,

given half a chance.

Well, look, erm...

If you have any further problemswith Lord Ashfordly's dog,

take my advice,

come and see us first, eh?

I know my rights when it comesto defending my livestock.

TRUCK ENGINE REVVING

TRUCK DOOR OPENS

There they are, Mr Greengrass.

This is Dusty and Shirley.

You've bought thesefor the eggs they're going to lay.

That's right.

David, the only egg you're gonna getout of either of them

is the egg you're gonna finish upwith all over your deaf face.

How do you mean?

How do I mean?Look at the state of them!

Look at the colour of their wattles!

Look at the state of their necks!

What's wrong with their necks?

They're supposed to havefeathers round 'em.

What does that prove?

It proves, David,that if they were human beings,

they'd be joining medown the post office every week

to fetch their pensions.

You've been sold a pup, son.

Or in your case,a couple of right boilers.

SHEEP BLEATS

CLAUDE SIGHS

ALFRED: This way, gentlemen.

Sergeant Craddock is expecting you.

Thank you.

- Oh, this is PC Bellamy.- Hello. Oh...

Hello, hello.HE CHUCKLES

Oh.ALL LAUGH

Yes, sir. I'm Alf Ventress.

I'm the longest serving officerin this station.

Yes, thank you, Ventress.

- Mr Arcourt, I presume.- Sergeant Craddock.

And this is Mr Carey, is it?

- My assistant.- How you doing?

Come in, gentlemen. Come in.

Thank you.

Three teas, Ventress.

RAYMOND:Public disruption, gentlemen.

Or rather the avoidance of it.

That's the chief concernof the police on these occasions.

Well, you havemy firm assurance, Sergeant,

that any of that will be kept downto the absolute minimum.

- Right, Harry?- Right, guv.

There are bound to be occasions,of course,

when certain areaswill need to be sealed off

temporarily from the public,you realize.

But of course.

And that would certainly applyto any filming up at Ashfordly Hall.

TELEPHONE RINGING You're filming up there, are you?

The very centrepieceof our picture, Sergeant.

In fact, Harry here's alreadybeen in touch

with Lord Ashfordly about it.

Well, it all sounds like the mostfascinating exercise, Mr Arcourt.

Of course I'm not entirelywithout experience

of the film business myself,you know?

No?

Having once been involvedin a police training film.

Good Lord.

So, we'll be in touch,Sergeant Craddock.

Yes, indeed.

Just one thing.

I wonder if you'd mind.

It's not for me, you understand.

Of course not.

I don't thinkwe should be doing this.

We're all right.

- Now then, Nathaniel.- What do you want, Greengrass?

I think there's beena bit of a misunderstanding

about these two Maransyou sold old David here.

Not on my part, there hasn't.

Ah, well.He wanted them for the eggs.

Did he? He never said.

Well, what else wouldanybody in their right mind

buy a couple of Marans for?- Well, I don't know, do I?

Perhaps he's not in his right mind.

I mean, look atthe company he keeps.

NATHANIEL CHUCKLES

Well, come on,what are you going to do about it?

Oh, well.Perhaps we should just leave this.

We'll leave it.

Come on, Clegghorn.

We both know there's no wayyou're gonna use that shotgun.

Mind you, one of us could be wrong.

Some place, eh, Harry?

It's even better inside.

CLAUDE: Go on, David.Tell him. They're yours.

DAVID: We've cometo report a robbery.

Oh, yes?

Yeah, a daylight. Look at the colourof the wattles on these birds.

Well, what's the matter with them?

"What's the matter with them?"They're the wrong colour!

- What colour should they be?- Red.

- What's that got to do with us?- The point is,

David's been sold these hensunder false pretences.

And the bloke who sold 'emjust wagged a loaded shotgun at us.

Who's that?

Nathaniel flaming Clegghorn.And I want him seen to.

INDIGNANT CLUCKING

Superb! Quite superb.

Absolutely exquisite!

So, My Lord, the facility feesuggested is satisfactory, is it?

More than satisfactory, yes.Most generous.

Cheap at the price,as far as we're concerned.

Although, I should warn you,My Lord,

that there will be a certain amountof inconvenience,

having my peoplescuffling about the place.

I'm sure we'll cope.

So, when do you expect to start?

As early as the weekend,if that's all right with you.

Oh, a bit short notice, but...

Oh, I can't see why not.

In which case,

how is it you peoplein the show business put it?

Break a leg, what?HE CACKLES

- Break a leg.- Right. Right.

ASHFORDLY: "Break a leg."

SHEEP BLEAT

ASHFORDLY: Laddie.Laddie, here, boy.

DOG BARKING

ASHFORDLY: Laddie?

Come on, boy.

BARKING CONTINUES

ASHFORDLY WHISTLES Laddie?

Come, boy.

Laddie.

ASHFORDLY WHISTLES

Come on, Laddie.

g*nsh*t ECHOES

Laddie?

So, that was Jackie's car, was it?

Yeah, yeah, the new one.

I see.ROTARY PHONE DIALING

Bradley, got a little job for you.My office, please.

Yes, Sarge.SETS RECEIVER DOWN

Well, look, tell her for me,will you,

I'm sorry, and all that?

But... Just doing my job.

Right.

FOOTSTEPS DEPARTING

Did you know it was her car?

No. Not for a minute, no.

DOOR SLAMS SHUTHE INHALES DEEPLY

It just goes to prove, though,doesn't it, Alf?

There, obviously, is somebodyup there after all, eh?

HE LAUGHS

So the dog wasn't actually hit,Lord Ashfordly?

That maniac definitelytook a shot at him, Bradley.

You saw him do that, did you, sir?

I didn't actually see himshoot as such, no.

His story was thathe shot at a rabbit,

and without any other witnesses,

it's your word against his,I'm afraid.

Well, I guess I'll justhave to make sure

that when next I exercisemy dog in that part of the estate,

I have my own -bore with me,won't I, Constable?

I don't think that's a good idea,My Lord.

I'm sure you don't.

But then, you don't have someonetaking pot sh*ts at your dog,

do you, Constable?

And with your blessing, apparently.

Here, boy!

PHIL INHALES DEEPLY AND GROANS

Right, then, Alf.HE SIGHS

A few bevvies over at theAidensfield Arms tonight, then?

Why?

Because Denzil Arcourt, the famousfilm director's staying there?

HE SIGHS Nothing to do with it. No.

No, of course not.

As a matter of fact,

there's a very good programmeon the telly this evening.

Something I've never been ableto fathom about you, Alf.

What's that?

This morbid preoccupation of yourswith Come Dancing.

HE CHUCKLES DRYLY Very funny.

CHICKEN CLUCKING

CLAUDE: Well, go on, David.

I'm not so sure about this,Mr Greengrass.

What's up with you?

We're only swappinga couple of old ones that can't

for a couple of young onesthat might.

Yeah, but what happensif he catches us?

He won't, will he?

We'll be in and outlike a dose of salts.

He won't even know we've been there.

Now, stop whingingand get in the truck.

Mr Greengrass?

I can't get in.

INDISTINCT CHATTER

Can you believe this lot?

How do you mean?

Well, people you wouldn'tnormally see in here

from one year and to the next,

now just because they thinkthey're going to get a glimpse

of Elizabeth Tayloror Richard Burton or somebody...

Hello, Maggie.

- Hello.- Got your autograph book with you?

That'll be the day, Andy,when I run after anybody

for their autograph.

So you're not a film fan, then?

I just find it a bit pathetic,

the way people go weak at the knees

just 'cause somebody'sgot a famous face.

Hello, you didn't tell mePeter O'Toole was in this picture.

- What?- Where?

HE CHUCKLES

Be quiet. Watch the noise. Come on.

My job's simply the best...

Alf? What are you doing here?

Oh, you wouldn't believe it.

The moment I sat down,the telly went on the blink.

'Course I believe you, Alf.

- Let me get you a drink, eh?- Okay.

All right. You remember what to do.

And try not to make any more noise.

Well, put 'em down!

Just make sureyou get a couple of young ones.

Go on.

AGITATED CLUCKING

David, keep the noise down!

OBJECT CLATTERS LOUDLY

David!

AGITATED CLUCKING CONTINUES

David. David, quick!

- What?- Well, somebody's coming! Come on!

CLAUDE WHEEZING AND MUTTERING

Hey, what are you doing?Hey! Wait!

Wait for me!

- Hello.- Hello.

You'll be Maggie Bolton, right?

Yes, that's right.

The district nurse round here?

How could you possibly know that?

Well, because I made it my businessto find out, really.

Oh, I see.

Why would you want to do that?

Well, because in the courseof any film sh**t,

accidents will happen, won't they?

And who better to advise me

on the localmedical facilities available

than the district nurse?

Oh, right.

So, before we go any further,and I start picking your brains.

Why don't you let mepay for that, eh?

Yes. Thank you.

Is he a film star, do you think?

Don't know.Could be, I suppose.

- What are you two up to, then?- Nothin'.

Mmm.

Well, make sureyou behave yourselves, all right?

Yes, sir.

MAN: Well, I suppose I did playa small part...

Oh. Just passing through, are we?

That's right.

Yes, you and the restof Aidensfield.

- Gentlemen.- You look very smart, Sarge.

INDISTINCT CHATTER

What's he wearing?HE SNIFFS

So, we can call on you any time,then, Maggie? Day or night?

Feel free to.

One for the road?

Well, I better not. Got to get upat the crack of dawn tomorrow.

But thanks for the offer.

Believe me,the pleasure was all mine.

And we'll be in touch.

- Okay. Bye, bye.- See you.

CHATTER AND LAUGHTER CONTINUES

I feel like a kid let loosein a toffee shop round here, guv.

Just don't tell the wife, eh?

- Can I have your autograph?- Certainly, young man.

Oi! Out of here, the pair of you.Now!

Ruddy kids.

RAYMOND: More to the point,

in licensed premisesat this time of night.

I'm surprised at you, Mr Blaketon.

Right, then.Big smile, everyone.

- Just what the devil are you doing?- Sorry?

ARCOURT: I should think you are!

What Mr Arcourt's tryingto tell you, Gina, love,

is that it's manners to ask first.Right, guv?

Right.

I didn't realize, honest.

He gets pestered all the timewith press photographers, you see.

- I'm really sorry, Mr Arcourt.- My dear Gina, please.

Look. Forget about it. Okay?

Right.

Sorry about that, gentlemen.Really quite unforgivable.

Such a childish outburst.

DOOR CLOSES

Do you think he knew it were us?

Don't talk daft!

r*fle COCKS

What were that?

What were what?

I think I heard something.

David, I wish you'd stop worrying.

There's no wayhe's going to know it were us.

HE SIGHSGUNSHOT

OBJECTS CLATTER

THEY WHIMPER

No, get off, get off.

KNOCK AT DOOR

Compliments of Mr Arcourt.

And fulsome apologiesfor last night.

Oh, Harry, they're lovely.Thank you.

Don't thank me, thank my guvnor.He paid for 'em.

Isn't that sweet of him?

Well, I better goput them in water, then.

ASHFORDLY: The ill feelingbetween my family

and the Clegghornsgoes back a long way.

To our grandfathers' time.

In fact, it all aroseout of a dispute

about that boundary, actually.

And was the dispute ever resolved?

Not finally, no.

My grandfather eventuallybecame bored with the whole thing.

However, if Clegghorn insistson throwing his weight about,

perhaps it's timethe case was properly resolved.

There's no doubt in my mind

which side the courtsare most likely to come down on.

So, there are the files,

giving you chapter and verseabout the entire business.

Right.

Claude.

Michael. To what do we owethe honour?

What on earth happenedto your windows last night?

CLAUDE HESITATES It were the storm last night.

It blew it right out,didn't it, David?

Really? I don't rememberthere being any storm.

Well, you must havebeen somewhere else

'cause it wereone of them freak things.

It were very localized, weren't it?

Right.

Well, well,

seems like all sorts of thingswere going on here last night.

Really?

Did you hear, somebody raidedNathaniel Clegghorn's henhouse?

No.

I don't suppose you two knowanything about that, do you?

- Us? No, no. Do we, David?- No, no.

It's just Alf Ventress reckonsyou two had a dispute with him

about a couple of hens.

That's been resolved very amicably,hasn't it, David?

Right.

Right.

No, it's just thatthe weird thing being,

that when Clegghorntook a beak count this morning,

he found he'd got two more hensthan he'd started out with.

Really?HE CHUCKLES

Funny, that, don't you think?

Hilarious.

Gentlemen.

Could I have a quick word, My Lord?

'Course you can.

Something's come up,

which means we're in a positionto start work right away.

Fine.

The problem being, My Lord,it'll get pretty noisy.

So we were thinkingwe should consider moving you

into a hotel for a couple of nights.

At our expense, of course.

How does a week at Claridge's sound?

Well, I'd sayit sounds most attractive.

Claridge's it is, then.

There are a couple of membersof staff

who live in permanently,you realize.

We'll take care of them, My Lord.

Come on in.

DOOR OPENS IN CORRIDOR

BELL DINGS

INDISTINCT CHATTER

CLOCK TICKINGKNOCK AT DOOR

ANDY: Gina?

Gina?

BELL DINGS

CAMERA THUDS

YELLING IN DISTANCE

- Andy!- I know, I know. I'm sorry.

I just got a call from the rig.

They want me back right away.INDISTINCT CHATTER

- But you've only just got here.- I've got no choice.

There's some big problems,apparently.

It's a case of all hands on deck,I'm afraid.

When will you be back?

Just as soon as I can.I promise.

Oh!

I'll make it up to you. Honest.

LAUGHTER AND CHATTER CONTINUES

Bye, love.

Ta-ra.

So, where was the camerawhen you last saw it?

On me dressing table upstairs.

Has anyone elsebeen into the room since then?

Only Harry.

Harry? Who's Harry?

Harry Carey.One of the film people.

He brought me some flowers.

But he followed mestraight back downstairs.

Okay, Gina.

Look, just leave it with me.I'll see what I can do.

All right.

There was one other funny thinghappened involving that camera.

That was the night before last.

Oh, yeah?

Yeah, when Gina triedto take Denzil Arcourt's photograph,

he seemed none too pleased.

Now, in my experience,show business people

don't usually objectto having their picture taken.

SHEEP BLEATINGCHICKENS CLUCKING

CAMERA CLICKS

Where did you get it?

- We found it.- And pigs might!

This bloke threw it away.

You must think I cameup the river on a barge.

It's the truth, Mr Greengrass.Look, it's got muck on it.

All right.How much do you want?

Ten quid.

Ten quid?

I might look like Father Christmas,but I'm not him.

- I'll give you five.- Seven, at least.

I'll give you five!Otherwise you can take it

to the police stationand try and get a reward.

Go on, then.

Here.

Nice shotgun, Mr Clegghorn.

Tell me something.

Did you knowthe firing pin of a shotgun

leaves a mark on the capof every cartridge shot from it?

Hmm.It's as unique as a fingerprint.

I didn't. No.

Well, take these, for instance.

Now, these were foundoutside Claude Greengrass's house

the morning after somebodyhad shot out his windows.

Aye?

Which means that we could identifythe w*apon used.

I see.

Now, between you and me,

we don't have any plansto take it that far at present,

especially as Mr Greengrasshas declined to make a complaint.

So?

Well, if thereare any further incidents

involving shotguns in the area,I suppose my sergeant could, er...

Well, he could justlook at it differently.

After all,certificates can be revoked.

So I'll, er...

Well, I'll just hang on to thesefor a while, just in case, eh?

You've read the documents, then?

- I have, yes.- And?

Well...

Put it this way.

I don't think your grandfatherdecided against

proceeding any furtherout of boredom, Lord Ashfordly.

No?

No. It seems more likely to me

he realizedthat if it did go to court,

not only wouldthe Clegghorn family win,

but your own family would lose

a large part of their adjacent landas well.

And therefore, he acted accordingly.Or, rather, didn't.

I see. So that's that?

Well, it certainly looks like it.

Meanwhile, Clegghorn continuesto prowl my perimeter

with that shotgun of hislike some latter-day Jesse James.

And there's not a thingwe can do about it.

LINE RINGING

THROUGH PHONE:'Arcourt Films.'

Hello, is Denzil Arcourt there,please?

I'm afraid Mr Arcourt is filmingin Yorkshire at the moment.

Can I take a message?

No, no, it's...It doesn't matter.

I'll call back later.

'Thank you.'

DIAL TONESETS DOWN RECEIVER

My advice to you would beto cause as little fuss as possible.

In case Clegghorn gets itinto his head

to go to litigation himself.

Well, thank you for your frankness,Mrs Bradley.

I'll certainly thinkabout what you've said.

Well, I'm sorryit wasn't better news.

I'll see myself out.

HE INHALES DEEPLY AND SIGHS

TELEPHONE RINGING

Ashfordly.

COINS CLATTER

INDISTINCT CHATTER

Here. Get one down.Let's hope it cheers you up.

All right, come on, come on.What's the matter?

I'm really missingDusty and Shirley.

CLAUDE: I thoughtthat'd be something like that.

There are timeswhen I worry about you.

That's a nice looking camerayou've got there, Greengrass.

It's not bad, is it?It's for sale.

£ and it's yours,and I'm giving it away at that.

Well, obviously,I'll have to think about that one.

Well, don't think too long.

Gina. Come here!

Now, don't say anything.

Can you see what I can see?Over there.

- GINA: My camera!- OSCAR: Are you sure?

I'm positive.What's Claude doing with it?

- That's a good question.- Well, let's go and ask him.

No, no.

Let's get someone else to ask him,shall we?

Can we help you, Constable?

Sergeant Craddock asked meto drop by

and make surethere was nothing you needed.

You can tell the good sergeantfor me

that everything is going swimmingly,thank you.

Right. Right.

Denzil, there was a telephone callfor you.

Excuse me.

So, er...

What's this film all about, then?

It's a sort of thriller, really,

with a real surprise ending.

Great. Great.

Would there have been anything elseof his I might have seen?

Highly unlikely, I'd say.

Unless you'reinto arty-crafty stuff.

Well, I...

MALE OFFICER THROUGH RADIO:'Delta, delta, alpha -.'

Excuse me.

'Control to delta, alpha -.'

Did he leave a name?

Okay, Beryl. Thanks for that.

Beryl. She had a phone callabout an hour ago asking for me.

- Who from?- They wouldn't say.

But there's only one personoutside the two of us

who has that number.

And that's the gentlemanwho just drove away.

He's just been askingabout what other films you've made.

So?

Time to make our move, I'd say.

If I had nicked it,

would I be stupid enoughto bring it back in here?

I seem to remember you've done

some pretty stupid thingsin your time, Greengrass.

Shouldn't you be polishingyour optics?

Where did you get it, Claude?

I found it.

Oh, come on, Greengrass.

You'll have to do better than that!

All right, Oscar. Leave it with me.Thank you.

Come on, Claude,stop messing me about

and tell me where you got it from.

Or do you rather we discussthis over at Ashfordly?

All right. I bought it.

Who from?

Two little kids.And they said they'd found it.

I don't even know who they are.You must have seen them.

They've been hanging aboutoutside here.

Well, since they're under the ageof criminal responsibility,

Greengrass, you,as a responsible adult,

could be found guiltyof larceny by finding.

In other words,

receiving is a much moreserious charge than petty theft!

I think you'd better take me downto the station, Michael,

before he turns itinto a capital offence.

Terribly sorry about this, Raymond.

My dear fellow.

Think nothing of it.

Cooperation is whatyou were promised

and cooperationis what you will get.

After all, that's show business,eh, Denzil?

Quite.

So, If you'd like to show mewhich roads around the estate

you'd like closing off.

ARCOURT: Good trip, then, My Lord.

And don't forget, the Krug'son my guvnor, all right?

- So fill your boots.- I'll do that.

THEY LAUGH

So when do we start?

Now's as good a time as any,I'd say.

Oi! I want to have a wordwith you two.

- What about?- This.

- Never saw it before.- Oh, yes.

You sold this camerato Claude Greengrass.

I want to know where you got it.

This man just threw it away.Didn't he, Trev?

Yeah.

Which man?

One of them film stars.The younger one.

Only before he did,he ripped the film out.

THEY MUTTER INDISTINCTLY Steady. Yeah.

- Careful, boys.- All right, guv.

All right.

I'll get it inside. You get the leg.

Well, he's gone.

- Yeah. So has this one.- Yes. Without paying their bills.

VEHICLE APPROACHING

Guv.

Would you believe,I've forgotten my reading glasses.

What the devil?

THEY CHATTER INDISTINCTLY

MUFFLED CHATTER

Bradley! Well done...

HE SHUSHES

No, we're done down there, Harry.

Come on.Let's get out of here.

TRUCK DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES

Come on!

Looking for this?

You're under arrest.

INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER

Everything under control, Ventress?

Oh, yes, Sarge. All quiet.

CAR HORN HONKING

TYRES SCREECH

What the devil do you thinkyou are you doing, Bellamy?

According to Mike,foiling a robbery, Sarge.

All right, you two. Out.

Good morning, My Lord.How are we feeling now?

Oh, I'll live, I think.

Everything was recovered,I'm glad to say.

- Excellent.- In fact, that's why I popped in,

to say thank youfor your prompt action last night.

Particularly Constable Bradleythere.

Well, that's what we're here for.

Between you and me,I had my suspicions

about those twofrom the very beginning.

- Do you know, so did I?- Really?

ALFRED: COUGHS MARKEDLY

Of course, as policemen,we couldn't do very much

until a crime had been committed.- Of course not.

Still, I think it'll take morethan those two phonies

to pull the wool over our eyes,eh, My Lord?

Well, I should say so.

ALL LAUGH

Would you care to step throughto my office?

Gladly.

Tea, Ventress.

HE SIGHS

DOOR CLOSES