- Is this your family?
- 'That's my family.'
It must be great
for you to all to be together.
Maybe someday you can
come for dinner.
Maybe you can come next week.
How about tonight?
You took her to your house?
I'm convinced I can help Darlene
and I'm not
about to give up on her.
I wouldn't want
that girl around my kids.
She scares me.
Don't let her break us up.
I won't let anybody break us up.
I promise.
- Darlene told me everything!
- You've seen her?
I'm gonna see her
every chance I get.
[theme song]
♪ There's a magic in the early
morning we've found ♪
♪ When the sunrise smiles
on everything around ♪
♪ It's a portrait
of the happiness ♪
♪ That we feel and always will ♪
♪ For eight is enough
to fill our lives with love ♪
♪ Oh we spend our days like
bright and shiny new dimes ♪
♪ If we're ever puzzled
by the changing times ♪
♪ There's a plate
of homemade wishes ♪
♪ On the kitchen windowsill ♪
♪ And eight is enough ♪
♪ To fill our lives with love ♪♪
[instrumental music]
Nicholas, aren't you afraid
you'll take off?
Elizabeth, can I borrow
your hair dryer?
Are you kiddin'?
It's still full of hamster hair
from the last time
you borrowed it.
I didn't know they shedded.
Uh, Nicholas, why the sudden
interest in your appearance?
Oh, I don't know.
It's my new slogan.
In order to do your best,
you have to look your best.
Oh! New girlfriend, huh?
[instrumental music]
Phew!
It must weigh a ton.
Well, we're a very heavy group.
[scoffs]
With jokes like that
you're lucky
you're playin' the Boondocks.
Hey, don't knock the Boondocks.
With a couple
of more gigs like this
we can hire somebody
to do the work.
They're payin' that much
for one night at Citrus Heights?
No, not yet, but maybe soon.
The band's really
comin' together.
Besides, we finally got a look.
We finally got personality.
What do you think?
Well, the fringe is nice.
Aren't you afraid
these rhinestones
may spook the buffalo?
Your problem is is
you just don't know class
when you see it. I'll be beatin'
the girls off with a stick.
Wowie!
You look just like Wayne Newton.
- Good morning.
- Oh, hi.
Did you see what was just
goin' on in the driveway?
Oh, you mean Tommy
overloading his van?
No, I mean, did you see
who was helping him?
Jeremy was helping him.
Jeremy? Helping?
It's amazing.
No, Tom, it's wonderful.
I think he's finally
beginning to feel
like a part of this family.
Yeah, well,
he has you to thank for that.
I never had much hope for him.
You worked a miracle.
No, we had a lot to work with.
Uh, go right ahead.
I'll keep my eyes closed.
Well, why don't
you stick around?
You might learn somethin'.
I'm sorry,
but I'm late for an audition.
Audition?
Don't you have work today?
'Well, this is work, dad.'
See, the brokerage house
is doin' a TV commercial
and they're using
real employees.
Little do they know
that a star is in their midst.
Well, I gotta get goin'
or I'm gonna be late.
Um, you can keep on doing
what I wasn't watchin'.
Thank you.
[instrumental music]
[school bell ringing]
(Abby)
Darlene Scott.
Listen, you have made
terrific, terrific progress.
I'm really proud of you.
I mean, you didn't miss
a single day of school last week
you got a B
on your history test.
It's great.
It's great improvement.
Mrs. Youngblood's
gonna be really pleased
when she gets back.
I don't have to go back to her,
do I?
But she's your
regular counselor.
But look how much better
I'm doing with you.
You make me wanna work hard,
Dr. Bradford.
Well, um, ahem,
we'll think about it, okay?
- Is this your family?
- 'It's my family.'
It must be great
for you to all be together.
- Which one's your favorite?
- Well, I don't have a favorite.
I mean, people don't compare.
Come on. You can tell me.
No, Darlene. They're unique.
There're as unique as you are.
If you met them,
you'd see what I mean.
You mean,
maybe I could get to meet them?
Well, sure. Maybe someday.
Yeah, sure.
What's the matter?
Well, nothing.
That's just one of those things
people say to be nice.
No, Darlene, I meant it.
Maybe someday you can
come for dinner.
Maybe you can come next week.
Oh, I can't.
My grandmother's
operation is next week.
So then, the week after?
How about tonight?
- Tonight?
- Yeah, I'm all alone tonight!
Okay. Tonight it is.
[instrumental music]
That's, uh, super, Bernice.
Just super.
We'll let you know, sweetheart.
Well, thank you.
Next girl, please.
- Hi. I'm Nancy Bradford.
- Hello.
- Hello. Hi.
- Hi, Nancy.
I, uh, don't suppose you've had
any modeling experience, Nancy?
Um, well, if you count
the Miss Sacramento pageant.
Who's countin'?
Uh, walk a little for us, Nancy.
Walk?
Yeah. Big smile, please.
That's easy. Okay.
Thanks.
- Uh, super, Nancy. Just super.
- Thanks.
Uh, we'll let you know,
sweetheart.
Oh.
Mm-hmm. Bye.
Wait a minute.
Hey..
Super.
Nancy, sweetheart..
...I don't wanna
break your heart
but you are wrong for this spot.
However,
and it's a big however
I have a client.
Very heavy TV.
Who's looking for someone
to do his commercials.
A-and we think
you'd be just super.
Me? Super?
At the very least.
[chuckles]
[whispering]
Go on. Ask her.
[whispering]
I will.
You're a chicken.
- I am not.
- Then ask her.
I'm waiting
for the right moment.
Yeah, like next Tuesday.
[whispering]
Let's get out of here.
- I don't understand.
- Here.
[instrumental music]
[baby cooing]
- Susan?
- Hmm.
Don't forget to set
an extra place for Darlene.
Oh, but Tom is up
in Citrus Heights, so it's even.
Oh, right. Thanks, yeah.
[doorbell dings]
I'll get it.
I-I'm looking for the Bradfords.
Well, you couldn't
have come to a better place.
You have an epidemic
at Bradford's
of various shapes and sizes.
Come on in. I'm Jeremy.
I'm Darlene.
Are you a Bradford?
Nah. Just a trainee.
Hi.
Hi.
So I walked in,
Easy Art took one look at me
and said I was perfect
for the part.
Easy Art. Who is that?
Oh, you know, dad, Easy Art
of Easy Art Heating And Cooling.
(Jeremy)
'Sounds like
a real class operation.'
Oh, Jeremy,
I know it's not Tiffany's
but the pay is good
for a few hours of work.
[laughing]
Easy Art. Easy Art.
Why does that name
sound so familiar to me?
Dad, you probably
saw the commercials
in the little stores.
You know, the ones that say
"Seven convenient locations
throughout that greater
Sacramento area."
Aren't those the ones with
the little igloos on the top?
- 'That's them.'
- Ah! Isn't that something.
I used to live right by one
when we first moved here
from Oklahoma.
Oh, so, um, Darlene,
what'd you do in Oklahoma?
Oh, just about what
I do here I guess.
My dad was in the oil fields.
You mean,
with gushers and everything?
Sure. I even saw one once.
It was where my dad
was k*lled in.
Darlene, I'm sorry.
Oh, don't go feeling bad
on my account.
That was a long time ago
and I really don't
remember him too much.
Except how he used
to pick me up
and throw me way up
over his head and catch me.
I bet you used to do that,
didn't you?
Oh, yes, I have done a lot
of throwing around here.
'I still have the bad back
to prove it.'
But it was all worth it.
(Darlene)
Yeah.
I bet my dad
was an awful lot like you.
Oh, thanks, Darlene.
I'm flattered.
(Darlene)
Oh, I'm the one
who is flattered.
For bein' invited here.
This is the best evening
I've had in years.
Ask 'em if they need
another trainee.
[indistinct chatter]
Hey, uh, Bartley.
I'm ready.
Art is ready. Everybody ready?
Uh, well, we're, uh,
we're having a minor problem
with the girl, Art.
Art's not gonna like that.
Well, what problem? What?
Oh, well, uh, ahem, she's, uh..
Nancy, come on. Please.
We have a deadline.
I know. I know.
It's just that I feel
a little stupid.
It just takes some
getting used to, that's all.
Okay.
Great. Just great.
- Doesn't she look great?
- Great.
She looks super.
I'm afraid
she'll melt the igloo.
- Helen.
- Hi.
Hi, how are you doin'?
Glad you're back.
How're you feeling?
Well, stupid
that I ever tried roller skates.
Abby, I've given up
on recreation.
It's too dangerous.
- I'll stick to work.
- Well, that's good.
In that case, I'll give you back
most of your case files.
- Most?
- Yeah.
Darlene Scott has asked
to stay on with me.
Do you want her?
Oh, yeah, very much.
She's made terrific progress
in the past three weeks.
Let me tell ya, Abby.
With Darlene
nothing is ever what it seems.
'You think she's improved
because that's what'
'she wants you to think.'
No, no. I have proof, Helen.
Her grades, her attendance.
Oh, she has the ability
to do the work
but she doesn't do it
without a reason.
'She can connive
and manipulate a person'
'like no one I've ever seen.'
I find that very hard
to believe.
Well, I believe it enough
to recommend that her case
be turned over
to a psychiatrist.
A psychiatrist?
Helen, that seems a bit extreme.
Abby, please don't be fooled.
You're very good,
but this is only your first
job in the field.
Now, look, Helen,
I'm convinced I can help Darlene
and I'm not
about to give up on her.
She responded beautifully
when she came
to the house for dinner.
You took her to your house?
Yeah.
You have a lot more courage
than I have.
I wouldn't want
that girl around my kids.
She scares me.
[telephone ringing]
Bradford residence,
this is Jeremy.
Oh, hi.
Yeah. Tonight?
Are you kidding?
I'd love to!
Great. Just tell me where.
Uh-huh. Alright,
I'll see you there. Bye.
Do you believe it?
I got a date.
With who?
Darlene. Darlene!
'Whoo!'
[instrumental music]
Alright.
Well..
Wait, do you realize
we're about to eat
the down payment for my car?
[gasping]
It only cost three dollars?
Yeah, well,
I just started saving.
Here's to your car.
I'll eat to that.
I hope I get to ride in it
a lot.
Yeah, me too. A lot.
Oh!
Do you think
that we could have sent
the payment checks
to the bank already?
Is that possible?
Abby?
Abby?
Well, I can see why this
is a futile effort
until Jeremy gets home.
Tom, I'm sorry,
I was just wondering..
I was wondering if Helen
could be right about Darlene.
I checked her records, and, uh,
she has a very rough history.
'Jeremy doesn't need
that kind of influence.'
Oh, how much influence
can she have on one date?
Come on, you guys.
Nancy's commercial is on.
Oh.
Nicholas, don't you have
some homework to do?
Dad, this is homework.
If it's good,
I'm gonna do a report on it.
Shh. It's time. It's time.
Hi, there, Art Simpson
'president of Easy Art
Heating And Cooling'
with some great news.
Friends, we've just opened
up our eighth friendly store
in the east Roseville
shopping centre
and we're gonna
have a special winter sale
on air conditioners.
So, why don't
you do yourself a favor
and stop in any Easy Art store
and enter our giant opening
'sweepstakes,
where the grand prize'
is a trip to Honolulu, Hawaii.
'We'll also be giving away..'
Cute.
(Art on TV)
'...air conditioners.'
'Plus, uh, hundreds
and hundreds of prizes'
'and soft drinks and balloons..'
[laughing]
So, friends, come on by
and see us here.
If you need some heat,
or you need some cold
Easy Art
won't be undersold. Yeah.
Well, so much for my report.
Nicholas.
Uh, Nancy, I thought
it was really very interesting.
Yeah. Interestin'.
You looked pretty.
Very pretty.
Oh..
It's awful!
(Nicholas)
'She shouldn't be so upset.'
I could do my report
on something else, you know.
I really had a good time.
Thanks.
Yeah, same here.
Your paint's peelin'.
I know.
Yeah, I figured you did.
I mean,
it's kind of obvious the way..
Goodnight.
Hi, Jennifer.
You don't know me, but..
Hello, Jennifer
you don't know me,
but we have study hall together.
Allow me to introduce myself.
Hey, I kind of like that.
Allow me to introduce myself.
Oh, wait a minute.
Don't tell me.
The last time this was washed
was when Mary was going out
with that doctor,
the married one.
It's called working off anxiety.
Tom, I'm really concerned
about Jeremy.
'I'm afraid he's gonna lose
the progress he made'
since he came here,
and I don't think
he and Darlene
should see each other again.
Do you plan on telling him that?
Yeah. Yeah.
If he ever comes home.
Well, you know,
he's really not all that late.
Why don't you wait
until his first date is over?
Maybe he'll make
that decision by himself.
How can you be so philosophical?
It's easy. You're using up
all the worry around here.
[Jeremy whistling]
Oh.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- I guess I'm late.
- Yes.
I'm glad you noticed that.
Have you been with Darlene
this whole time?
Huh. Yeah.
Listen, Jeremy, we should
talk ab-about Darlene.
I already know about her.
She's the greatest girl
I ever met. The greatest.
Thanks for introducing us, Abby.
You made my world.
Jeremy..
[sighing]
Do you wanna trade
some of that cheap philosophy
for some of that worry?
[telephone ringing]
Is Mr. Bailey ever
on the warpath this morning?
And guess who he's looking for?
I don't know, Bernice. Who?
You.
[instrumental music]
[instrumental music]
[sighs]
Allow me to introduce myself.
Well..
Well what?
I'm allowing.
Yeah.
Well, I'm Nicholas Bradford.
And I think we should go out
for hamburgers Saturday night.
Why should I?
Well, I don't know.
Because I asked you, I guess.
Mmm, I'm really
used to older boys.
They're much more sensitive,
you know.
And I'm into sensitive men.
Well, I'm sensitive.
I get a rash every time
I wear polyester.
I mean, a man who's not afraid
to show his feelings.
A man who's..
...not afraid to cry at movies.
A man who's at home
in the kitchen
as well as the garage.
- The kitchen?
- Of course the kitchen.
A man who can cook
is my kind of man.
Well, maybe Saturday night
I can cook dinner for you
instead of hamburgers.
- Can you?
- Sure.
I'm very good in the kitchen.
Very good.
Then I'll see you
Saturday night. Ciao.
Right. The chow. I'll call you.
Well, what happened?
I'm not sure.
You mean she said maybe?
I mean, I got three days
to become her kind of man.
Come on, Merle. What is it?
- A pink dress.
- Oh, how feminine.
At least it's not
a baseball bat.
Hey, everybody, I'm home.
What do you say we all run out
and unload my van?
We pull together,
we can get her done in no time.
No way, Tommy. You still
owe me from the last time.
- Yeah, me too.
- Me too.
And Sander Sue's
not a candidate.
I don't believe this.
Whatever happened to my loving,
cooperative, helpful sisters?
- They left.
- Never heard of them.
Nancy, I was just about to--
Tommy, look,
just don't bug me, would you?
I just quit my job
at the brokerage.
You quit the only job
you've ever kept?
You'd quit too, dad.
Do you know what
Mr. Bailey said?
He said that the commercial
was degrading and derogatory
to the good reputation
of Bates, Callahan and Chester.
And if I didn't quit
the modeling immediately
'he'd fire me.'
Well, I told him what he could
do with his good reputation
and I walked out.
He can't do that.
I think you ought to talk
to a lawyer, Nance.
Yeah, w-why don't I call Janet?
Wait a minute.
There's more, there's more.
I got a message at the office
to call Easy Art.
Starting tomorrow, I'm gonna be
in all his commercials.
I'm gonna be a full-time Eskimo!
I hope you didn't break
your woofer.
I beg your pardon?
Your woofer.
Like in tweeter and woofer.
They're components
in your speaker.
'I hope you didn't break them.'
Yeah, well, actually
these aren't the kind
of speakers
that have woofers and tweeters.
Oh.
Well, even if they don't
you shouldn't drop them
on the ground.
Well, then,
maybe you'd like to help me.
No, I'm not very good
at hard labor.
Is that right?
What are you good at?
Mmm, huh,
wouldn't you like to know?
Yeah, that's why I asked.
Who are you anyway?
Now, wait a minute. Shouldn't I
be asking you the same question?
[chuckles]
Maybe, but I asked you first.
Alright, then.
I'm Tommy Bradford.
Ah, a Bradford.
I'm Darlene Scott.
Well, have you been hanging
around our driveway long?
[chuckles]
No. I just came by to see Abby.
Oh, I don't think she's here.
Then, I guess you'll just
have to drive me home.
Ow! Oh!
[instrumental music]
[van engine revving]
[music continues]
Hey, you've seen Tommy yet?
He isn't home yet.
- He isn't home yet?
- That's what I said.
Listen, where you come from
did you ever hear of a dessert
called chocolate mouse?
It can't be what it really
sounds like, you think?
I don't know, but Melvin said
his uncle had chocolate ants--
Hey, just knock it off!
What's wrong? You on a diet?
[doorbell rings]
- Yes, what is it?
- Hello, Mr. Bradford.
Johnny Johnson,
Easy Arts Heating And Cooling.
Oh, oh, we are not interested.
Oh, Mr. Johnson, I'm sorry.
I didn't realize.
No sweat. Happens all the time.
Yes, come in.
You must want to see Nancy.
Nope, I just need someone
to sign for this
air conditioner.
- Air conditioner?
- Mm-hmm.
- What air conditioner?
- That one.
Nancy!
Dad, how can you turn down
a free air conditioner?
Like this.
Thank you very much
for your trouble
but we don't need
an air conditioner.
Why not?
Well, in the first place,
it's the middle of the winter.
Yeah, but,
summer will be here soon.
Yes, and when summer gets here
we already have
air conditioners.
They're called windows
and you'll find them
conveniently located
throughout the Bradford house.
Uh, Mr. Bradford, it is very
important to Easy Art
that Nancy use the product
so that she can be
a legitimate spokesperson.
Right, and if I refuse,
I'll probably lose my job
and I'll have to
mooch off people
and borrow lots of money.
Where do I sign?
(Tom)
'You know,
cooking dinner for a girl'
is a pretty big undertaking
on your first date.
Face it, dad. I'm growing up.
Yeah, I guess you are.
Does that mean I get
a bigger allowance?
No, no, it means that
now you're mature enough
to appreciate your
present allowance.
Hi. Sorry, I'm late.
I got a little side-tracked.
It's okay, I left some
dinner in the refrigerator
for you and Jeremy.
Wasn't Jeremy with you?
No, but I was
with a friend of yours.
- Who?
- Darlene Scott.
- Darlene Scott?
- Yeah.
Tommy, what happened?
Tell me exactly what happened?
What could happen?
I gave the girl a ride home.
No, Tommy, this is important.
Yeah, come on, Tommy.
Tell us all about it.
Jeremy, wait a minute.
I'll talk to Tommy, okay?
Wait a minute?
My girl comes to visit.
This creep's trying
to hustle her away!
Hey, what's going on?
Hey, don't play innocent to me!
I ever catch you near her again,
I'm gonna flatten you--
Now, Jeremy,
you go to your room.
- Take it easy. Come on.
- Oh, that's just great!
He is the back stabber,
and I get punished!
Would somebody mind telling me
what's been happening
around here?
I think it's obvious that Jeremy
has fallen for this girl.
Well, how was I
supposed to know that
with the way she was
coming on to me?
- She did?
- 'Sure.'
That's great.
Tommy, you see,
Darlene has a lot of problems.
She was sent to Abby
for counseling.
Well, you should counsel her
not to chase
two guys in the same house.
I better apologize to Jeremy.
It's my responsibility. I'm the
one that brought her home.
Oh, you had no way of knowing
what the girl would do.
No, I could have
checked her records earlier
but I was so taken in by her.
I mean, if I'd been aware enough
I could have anticipated
this whole thing.
For heaven's sake,
you're a counselor
not a mind reader.
I'll tell you one thing.
It's not gonna happen again.
Nicholas, what are you
doing out here?
Oh, Jeremy needed more room
to throw stuff.
What?
Listen, are you gonna be here
Saturday night?
No, why?
Phew! I didn't want you
hustling Jennifer.
- Look, Jeremy--
- Just save it, huh, Bradford!
[instrumental music]
Hi, Dr. Bradford.
Hi, Darlene.
You always do the nicest
things for me.
History is my favorite class
to get called out of.
Why don't you sit down?
We have a lot to talk about.
- Sounds serious.
- Yeah, it is.
I think that the two of us
need to come to a..
Well, to a new understanding.
About what?
'Let's just start with Jeremy.'
I don't know
what he's told you
but see he's come out of
a very bad time in his life.
Then he's really lucky
he has you.
[chuckles]
I don't know about that.
See, uh, I may have let
situation occur
that's hurt him very much.
I want you to try
and understand this, okay?
See, I feel the need
to protect Jeremy
and, uh, I don't wanna hurt you.
What do you mean?
I want you to take a look
at how your behavior with Tommy
has created
a very big impact on Jeremy.
Why? What did I do?
You know what you did, Darlene.
I'm talking about
the game with Tommy.
Now, Tommy can handle it,
but Jeremy just can't.
Wait a minute.
Are you his counselor or mine?
Well, I've thought
a lot about that
and I think what
would be best for both of us
is if you go back
to Mrs. Youngblood
as your counselor.
No!
Look, Darlene, the feelings
of my family are involved now
see, and I just can't be
objective for you.
In other words,
you're dumping me.
No, I'm not dumping you,
and you know that.
You know I care about you.
I only want what's best for you.
I've heard that before.
And every time
it was the same old lie!
I mean it.
Oh, sure.
I thought you were
something special.
But you're just like
all the rest.
Nicholas, it's only Thursday.
Aren't you starting
a little bit early?
- Well, I'm just practicing.
- 'Oh.'
- Do you need any help?
- No, that's okay.
I'm just having a little trouble
with the tbls and the tsps.
You're what?
See right there,
"tbls" and "tsps".
No, Nicholas, uh,
those are abbreviations.
See, now a tbl, uh, a tbl
is a tablespoon, right.
And a tsp is a basic teaspoon.
Oh, no wonder
I couldn't find them.
Now, where do we keep
the cog-nac?
Cognac?
Yeah, whatever, I need
eight tbls of it.
What are you making?
Boudoir spice souffle?
What kinda cookbook is this?
"The Sensuous
Bachelor's Cookbook?"
Yeah. I got it at the library.
See, Jennifer's into
sensitive men.
So I figured
it was a good choice.
Oh, uh, well, um, sensuous
and sensitive aren't exactly
the same thing.
Oh, yeah? What's the difference?
The difference? Well--
Is it something I need to know
for Saturday night?
- No, no.
- Good.
I don't think so.
[humming]
[knock on door]
Yeah, come on in.
Oh, boy, that look
on your face says
you didn't drop in
for chit-chat.
- It's that obvious, huh?
- Yeah, what's on your mind?
- Can I talk to you?
- Sure. Come on in.
Pull up a chair.
Uh, Nance, how serious are you
about this job with Easy Art?
Well, considering it's my
only job at the moment
I'd say rather serious.
Why?
Well, I-I missed your
commercials, you know
and I wanted to see it
so I asked the station
if they had a tape
and...they said
they refused to show
Easy Art commercials.
Refused? Why?
Um, well, here.
I got these out of
the morgue at the station.
What?
He's a crook, Nance.
'Oh, Joannie,
these are very old articles.'
Well, maybe he's reformed.
Look, Joannie, the man gave us
a very expensive
air conditioner
so his advertising would be
perfectly honest.
[chuckles]
Now that doesn't sound
like a crook to me.
Look, I know
you're trying to help me
but I know what I'm doing,
so just..
[sniffing]
- Do you smell something?
- Yeah.
Look, it's smoke!
sh**t!
[coughing]
It's jamming.
No, it's the air conditioner.
[coughing]
What's wrong? What's wrong?
Hi, dad, uh,
it's the air conditioner.
We're having a little problem.
Well, I wanna talk
to that Easy Art.
He has a big problem.
- Jeremy, hi, can we talk?
- Yeah, well I'm real busy.
Why don't you just go
talk to Tommy?
Wait a minute.
I know how it looks,
but it's not my fault.
Not your fault? I didn't see
anybody force you into his van.
You know it all, huh?
Then maybe you know the whole
thing was Abby's idea.
- Abby? Not Abby.
- 'That's right.'
She told Tommy to take me home.
- But why?
- It's pretty obvious, isn't it?
She wants to split us up.
- No.
- Sure.
She called me into
her office today
and said I couldn't see you.
'Just watch. She's gonna
lay it on you next.'
Promise me
you won't listen, Jeremy.
Don't let her break us up.
I won't let anybody break us up.
I promise.
[instrumental music]
[coughing]
Not to worry, Mr. Bradford.
It's just a loose fan belt.
Caused it to overheat.
You're sure that's all it is?
Well, no,
but I'm probably pretty close.
You want real close, huh?
Well, see,
I don't normally do this
but Easy Art was so insistent..
What I can do
is I can cut the air off
and have a serviceman
out here in a couple of days.
Couple of days?
First thing tomorrow?
Right away.
Sorry, dad.
[door opens]
Jeremy, I've been
waiting for you.
- Yeah, I knew you would be.
- Well, I gotta talk to you.
- I figured you'd say that.
- You know what I figure?
I figure you're still
real upset about Darlene.
Come on, Abby. Tell the truth.
You're upset about her.
That's right,
I am upset that she hurt you
and I want you to understand
where she's coming from.
Look, why, why don't you
just save the lecture
because Darlene
told me everything.
You have seen her? When?
Just now, and I'm gonna see her
every chance I get.
Jeremy, I don't think
that's wise.
I wasn't exactly
asking your opinion.
Well, maybe you better hear it.
Now listen, Darlene has more
problems than I can handle
or you can handle.
'She can only be
trouble for you.'
Now, I want you to think about
what I'm trying to tell you.
There's nothing to think about.
It didn't work when you tried
to break us up through Tommy
and it isn't working now.
[instrumental music]
[door slams]
- Dad, I'm freezing.
- Oh, I know, I know.
Yeah, dad,
what happened to the heat?
I'll bet Easy Art's head klutz
turned off the heat
instead of the air conditioner.
Oh, I'll get
some more blankets.
Well, save some for me.
Oh, you're still up.
Yeah, I can't sleep.
Why? Because of the cold?
No, because of the trouble
I've created for Jeremy.
You know you haven't
read that book
since you finished your thesis.
I know. I'm looking for answers.
There aren't any.
I feel so awful.
Jeremy's back where he was
when he started.
He doesn't trust us anymore
and I'm afraid of what Darlene
might try to do next.
Why? Like what?
Well, she was
real angry with me.
See, I think in her mind,
she thinks I was rejecting her
so I'm afraid she might try
to get back at me
through Jeremy.
But do you really think
she is capable
of doing something like that?
Yeah, I do.
Helen tried to warn me,
but I didn't listen.
See, 'cause I thought
we had such a deep rapport.
You know, sometimes,
I just see what I wanna see.
You know what I mean?
Do you have any suggestions?
Well, yes, just two.
The first one is this.
We've got to hope
that Jeremy trusts us
and if he doesn't trust us
well, then we've got
to trust him.
You've brought him a long way.
'He should be able
to figure out Darlene.'
That's wishful thinking.
Suggestion number two?
Uh, well, we'll discuss that
after a good night's sleep.
[instrumental music]
[dishes rattling]
- Tom.
- 'Hmm?'
- Tom!
- 'Hmm?'
Did you hear that, Tom?
- What?
- Did you hear that?
- Hear what?
- That noise.
What noise?
That noise.
Go back to sleep.
It's just the milkman.
Tom, we don't have a milkman.
[instrumental music]
Oh, hi, dad.
That's it, Nicholas.
Get to sleep.
Oh, dad, can I stay up please?
I've got the whole menu
counted off to the split second.
If I go to bed, I'll ruin my
whole schedule for the day.
It's o'clock in the morning.
You'll freeze to death.
Dad, I'm young. I can take it.
Besides, if I had a paper out
I'd be out on
the mean streets freezing.
At least now I can freeze
in the safety of my own home.
Oh, alright, Nicholas.
Just keep the noise down.
(Nancy)
Repairmen are
all finished, dad.
I don't think you'll be having
any more trouble, Mr. Bradford.
Well, what is this?
- It's the bill.
- Bill? What bill?
Eight hundred dollars!
This is the most
ridiculous thing
I've ever heard of
in my whole life!
Wait a minute.
This is new equipment.
It should be under
warranty or something.
Warranty? Are you kidding?
You don't make any money
on a warranty.
'Well, don't you understand?'
Yes. I'm beginning
to think I do.
Oh, that's where
you've been hiding.
Hey, just stay out of my way
if you know what's good for you.
I know what's good for me.
The question is do you?
Yeah, I know.
'Cause I know
what really happened
between Darlene and you.
If you knew what really
happened, you'd be apologizing.
I should apologize because Abby
made you take Darlene home?
Abby? Is that what
Darlene told you? She's lying.
Hey, one more cr*ck like that
and you'll be
playing guitar in crutches.
Don't push your luck, Jeremy.
Darlene isn't worth it.
- You take that back.
- I'll take it back.
But you just think
about everything
that Abby's done for you.
Then you tell me
who's really lying.
[instrumental music]
(Artie)
'Yeah, I see the problem.'
[Artie grunts]
Well..
...somebody..
...uh, gave you our special
instead of our top of the line
which you're supposed to get.
Just a, uh, clerical, uh, error
and I'll replace the unit
as, as soon as possible.
Oh, and, Mr. Bradford,
as for this..
Here, now, uh, everybody happy?
Everybody happy?
And, uh, how about my little
gold mine. Are you happy?
Well, there's something I just
don't understand, Artie.
What's the difference
between your special
and your top of the line?
Oh, well, in, uh, simple terms
the, uh, top of the line
has, uh, more metal
uh, thicker bearings, and the,
uh, special has more plastic.
You ready to go, Johnny?
Not just yet, Johnny.
Then the special must
wear out more quickly, huh?
Ooh! Let's just say
they don't last forever.
You wanna grab the stuff,
Johnny?
Just a minute, Johnny.
And then when they do break down
and people call you out
to fix them
you fix them 'cause they think
they're under warranty, right?
But you charge them a bundle
because there is no warranty.
[Artie laughs]
You got quite a head
for business, little lady.
No, for this kind of business,
I think I need a nose.
'Cause it stinks.
And I don't wanna
have any part of it.
You can take your
air conditioner, and your job
'and get out of here.'
Now, Johnny.
[instrumental music]
Hi.
Am I glad to see you.
Me too.
I was afraid you wouldn't
get my message.
My grandmother's
kind of forgetful.
Oh, I got it,
but I didn't understand it.
I know.
I was kind of mysterious.
I didn't want her to know
how stupid I was.
- Stupid?
- Yeah. Would you believe it?
I locked the keys
in my grandmother's car.
She has a car?
Yeah. Right over here.
She sent me to do her shopping.
When I got out,
I left the keys under the seat
and locked all the doors.
Pretty dumb, huh?
Well,
doesn't she have another key?
Uh, that's the problem.
I lost it last month.
You gotta help me, Jeremy
or she'll never let me
drive her car again.
Yeah, what can I do?
Well, isn't there some way
people can get in without a key?
Yeah.
See, I knew you could help.
That took a lot of courage.
I'm very proud of you.
Yeah, but I'm still
out of a job.
And the way I see it
it's better to be out of a job
than to be out of principles.
Thanks, dad.
You know, despite everything
I think modeling was
the best job I ever lost.
But who says you have to stop
just because Easy Art
was such a hard beginning?
If it's the career you want,
go for it.
You really think
I could make it?
Of course, I do.
You're beautiful.
Well, that's something
I inherited.
From my dad.
You made your phone call?
Yeah.
Grandma worries if I'm late.
How's it coming?
Oh, you won't be too late.
[indistinct
police radio chatter]
What's going on?
She, uh, locked the keys inside.
Really? It's your car?
No, it's hers.
Her grandmother's.
May I see your driver's license?
I don't have one.
And that's not my car.
He just said we'd get some
wheels and go for a ride.
'I told him we could
get into trouble.'
Wh-what's wrong with you?
He says he does this
all the time.
Wait, she's lying.
I'm lying? Who's breaking in?
Don't let him hurt me, officer.
Just hold it, son.
Put your hands on the car
and spread your feet. Come on.
- Wait, you don't understand.
- Just move it!
His poor Aunt Abby will be
so embarrassed.
Abby?
Don't be surprised
when she lets you down too.
You did all this just..
...to hurt Abby.
Why not? She hurt me.
I'm sorry for you, Darlene.
'Real sorry.'
[instrumental music]
I really hate him making you
come down here to get me.
I've seen police stations
before. Don't worry.
I will worry for a long time.
She really pulled
one over on me.
Hey, she pulled one over
on all of us.
I wanna tell you something,
okay?
I want you to imprint this
on your brain.
I love you, Jeremy
and I would never ever
lie to you.
I know, but...at the time..
...I really could have liked
Darlene, you know?
I know. I saw how you felt.
I guarantee you
that hurt will go away.
I just keep wondering
what's gonna happen to her.
It's probably for the best
I mean, Helen and I
recommended the judge
that, uh, she get
the psychiatric care
that she really needs.
I'm glad I got you, Abby.
I'm glad you're back, Jeremy.
I'm real glad.
So, things are cool?
Things are cool.
[instrumental music]
Oh, why, Nicholas!
Simply scrumptious!
And the entry.
Gateau de crepes
a la Florentine.
And for dessert..
...mousseline chocolat.
Oh, oh, muchas gracias,
Nicholas. Muchas gracias.
Oh.
I didn't think he could do it
but that was a very good dinner.
He's so sweet.
I bet he's really tired.
Ah, the things we
Bradfords do for love.
[Abby giggles]
Mmm, Nicholas..
...it's all so heavenly.
I propose a toast.
To our chef.
Nicholas?
'Nicholas?'
[theme music]
[music continues]
05x10 - The Darlene Dilemma
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The show was modeled on the life of syndicated newspaper columnist Tom Braden, a real-life parent with eight children, who wrote a book by the same title.
The show was modeled on the life of syndicated newspaper columnist Tom Braden, a real-life parent with eight children, who wrote a book by the same title.