04x21 - Trust Me

[bunniefuu]

Oh, Cliff.

Clair, I've Been
On My Feet For Hours.

I Delivered So Many Babies,
After Awhile

The Babies I Delivered
Started Having Babies.

I Want You To Feel Sorry For Me.

I Can't,
I'm Too Tired.

You Have To, You Have To.

You've Worked
Three Weeks Straight.

Days.

Oh... Poor Thing.

Ick!

Hey, Put The Baby Here!

Oh, Cliff.

I'm Sorry.

That's It.

You Should Take
Some Time Off Right Away.

I Will, But I Still
Have Some Things To Do.

You Don't Have Patients
Coming In The Office.

No, But I Have
Paperwork To Do.

Paperwork, Dear.

The Paperwork Can
Take Care Of Itself.

Not Really.

Are You On Call At The Hospital?

Yeah. I've Got Two Days
I Have To Serve.

Go On...

Get Undressed.

What About
Dr. Dailey?

Uh-Huh.

Doesn't
He Owe You

Some Time From Those Days
You Covered For Him?

Mm-Hmm.

Call Him And Tell Him
To Cover For You

For The Next
Couple Of Days.

Take A Mini-Vacation.

What Am I Going To Do?

You Won't Do Anything.

You're Going To Relax.

What Are The Children
Going To Do?

I'll Talk To The Children.

Can I Eat What I Want?

Yes, All Diets Are Off.

And I Don't Have To Shave?

Nope.

I Don't Have To Shower?

You Do Have To Shower.

You Could Use
My Bubbles.

You Could Take
A Bubble Shower.

Really?

Yes.

Yippee!

I'm On Vacation.

Yes, And If You Like

I Can Give You
A Bon Voyage Party.

Really?

I'll Be The Ocean Liner
And You'll Be The Tug Boat?

Okay, And Then
We'll Dock Together.

( Ocean Liner Horn )

Good Morning, Theo.

Vanessa,
Listen To This.

Five Bedroom, Two Bathroom
Condo On The Beach In Honolulu.

And It Only Goes For $ , .

This Is What I'm Looking For.

Right, Theo.

You Have $ ,
To Buy A Condo.

No...

Not By Myself.

I Formed A Partnership
With Other Guys At School.

We're Going
To Put Together

The Money We Earn During Summer

And Share A Condo.

You're Going To Share Five Rooms
With Other Guys?!

Hey, These Aren't
Just Other Guys.

These Are My Best Friends.

Vanessa, Can I
Ask You Something?

Sure, Rudy.

Kenny Told Me
A Riddle Yesterday

And I Can't Figure It Out.

Why Couldn't You Come To Me
With The Riddle?

Because Vanessa's Smarter.

Thank You, Rudy.

So What's The Riddle?

I Have Two American Coins
That Add Up To Cents.

One Of Them Is Not A Nickel.

Explain This.

Two American Coins
That Add Up To Cents

And One Of Them Isn't A Nickel.

Are You Sure You Got
The Riddle Right?

That's What Kenny Said.

Two Coins Add Up To Cents...

Two American Coins
That Add Up To Cents

One Is Not A Nickel?

It Can't Be.

Kenny's Trying To Trick You.

Of Course!

I Figured It Out.

Oh, Stop It, Theo.

You Did Not.

You Want To Bet
I Know The Answer?

What Should We Bet?

If I Know The Answer

You Make My Bed Tomorrow.

I'll Make Your Bed For A Week!

Me, Too.

You're On.

The Question Is

How Can Two Coins
Add Up To Cents

When One Of Them
Is Not A Nickel.

I Have A Quarter,
I Have A Nickel.

Cents.

Wait A Minute.

This Is A Nickel.

One Coin Is Not A Nickel.

This Is A Quarter.

This Is Not A Nickel.

Good Morning, Good Morning.

Dad, Theo
Cheated Us On A Bet.

He Cheated Us Bad.

They Lost And Now
They're Whining.

We Are Not Whining!

I Have An Announcement To Make.

I'm On Vacation At Home
For The Next Two Days.

Mom Told Us.

Go To School Today.

Ask Your Friend

"May I Stay With You
For Two Days?"

Okay?

If They Say No,
Offer Them Money.

( Knocking )

Come In.

Mrs. Huxtable?

You'll Never Guess Who's
Waiting In The Reception Area.

Diane Hemmings.

The Reporter Who
Interviews Celebrities On Tv.

Oh, Great.

Send Her In.

Is She Interviewing You?

No, She's Just A Good Friend.

I Watch Her All The Time.

Shall I Get You
Her Autograph?

I Already Did.

Mrs. Hemmings?

Hi, Diane.

Hey, Clair.

I Know You're Busy.

I'll Only Stay A Minute.

But I'm So
Glad You Came.

I Saw Your
Paul Newman Interview.

Oh, Yeah.

It Was An Interesting Day.

Have You
Lost Your Senses?

You Went For A Ride
In His Race Car.

"It Was An Interesting Day"?

I'm Sorry, Clair.

I'm Not Feeling
Too Enthusiastic Right Now.

Sorry, Have A Seat.

What's The Matter?

Richard And I
Are Having Troubles.

He's Accusing Me
Of Being Unfaithful.

Oh, Silly Man.

Does He Have Reason
To Believe This?

Clair...

I Love Richard,
And I'm Sure He Loves Me.

Where Is He Getting These Ideas?

When I Go Off On These Trips
To Interview Celebrities

It Gets Him Crazy.

What Do You Mean?

While I'm Packing,
He Goes Through My Suitcase

Pulls Something Out And Says

"Don't Take This Sexy Dress."

He Isn't Serious, Is He?

Very.

That's Not All.

When I'm On The Road

He Calls Very Late

To See
If I'm There.

Then He Wants To Know
If Anyone Else Is With Me.

Oh, Get Out.

I Can't Convince Richard
That I Love Him

When He Doesn't Trust Me.

Are You Here For Legal Reasons?

Sort Of.

I'm Thinking Of Getting Out.

( Western )

Hi, Cliff.

Hey!

Cliff!

I'm On Vacation.

I'm On Vacation.

Diane Hemmings Came
To See Me Today.

Really?

She Heard I Was On Vacation

And Wanted To Interview

A Suave, Handsome Doctor.

No.

She And Richard
Might Be Splitting Up.

What's Wrong?

The Problem Is That Richard
Is So Insecure.

He Doesn't Trust Diane
Interviewing Famous Celebrities.

She Does Hang Out With Some
Good-Looking Guys.

Cliff, I Can't Believe
You Said That.

Can't Believe What?

So Because A Woman
In Her Business

Has Contact With Attractive Men

Her Husband Has A Right
To Be Suspicious?

No, I Didn't Say The Husband
Had A Right To Be Suspicious.

What Did You Say?

I'm Saying That If A Man
Had A Very Attractive Wife--

Such As I Do--

And This Wife Was Known To Have
To Associate With Handsome Men

These Handsome Men Might
Have A Certain Thing In Mind.

I'm Saying He May Think
That They Have That In Mind

And That She Might Not Mind
What They Have In Mind.

Cliff, If I Had A Handsome
Movie Star As A Client--

Would You Trust Me?

Of Course, Dear.

If I Wore A Sexy Dress

Would You Trust Me?

Of Course I Would
Trust You, Dear.

I Trust You Because I Love You.

I Always Have,
And I Always Will.

What If I Took A Business Trip
With This Man

And Stayed At The Handsome
Actor's House Overnight?

That's Where You're Wrong
Because There's No Reason

For A Lawyer To Stay
At The Client's Home.

Let's Say That The Files
I Have To Study For The Case

Are In This Man's House.

So I Have To Stay Overnight
In The Sexy Dress.

Would You Trust Me?

I'm On Vacation.

Cliff, Answer The Question.

You'd Trust Me, Wouldn't You?

Of Course I Would Trust You.

Of Course I Would.

Thank You.

You're Welcome.

Let's Just Say

While You're Out There
With The Sexy Man

And You're Going
Through His Files

And I'm Sitting Here On Vacation

And The Tv Set Breaks Down.

The People Send Over
A Young, Gorgeous Lady

To Fix The Set.

How Young?

Oh, , Firm
And Fully Packed.

A Child.

Yes.

And Let's Say I'm Sitting Here

Waiting For Her To Fix The Set

And She Says,
"Dr. Huxtable, I'm Sorry.

I Cannot Fix This Set Unless
I Take All My Clothes Off."

Would You Trust Me?

Honey, That Couldn't Happen.

That's A New Tv Set.

It Won't Break.

Same Way That The Man's Files
Were All In His House

And You Didn't Have
A Hotel To Go To

In That Town You're In.

That's The Same Way
This Woman Took Her Clothes Off.

Same Way The Tv Set Broke Down.

And My Question Is,
Would You Trust Me?

There Are
Children In This House.

Children Went To
The All-Night Library.

The Children Would Not
Go To An All-Night Library.

If I Send Them, They Will.

In The First Place

I Did Not Spend The Night
At Anybody's House.

Mm-Hmm.

You Can Just Forget About

Miss Tv Repair Person

Coming Up Here
With No Clothes On.

Not In My House

In Front Of My Tv
And My Children.

And Let The Record Show...

Oh, Lord, The Record's Showing.

The Only Person I'd Ever
Wear A Sexy Dress For Is You.

Thank You.

Thank You Very Much, Dear.

And There Will Be
No -Year-Old

Coming Here Fixing
The Tv Set.

And No -Year-Old.

Or -Year-Old.

And No -Year-Old.

And No -Year-Old.

Oh, Janet, That's A Good One.

Thanks.

I'll Call You Back, And
Let You Know How It Goes.

Rudy, Janet Just
Gave Me A Riddle

That Theo Will
Never Guess.

We'll Win Our Bet Back.

What's The Riddle?

Okay, Pay Attention.

If A Plane Crashed

Right On The Border Between
The United States And Canada

Where Would You Bury
The Survivors?

I Don't Know.

Where?

Nowhere.
You Don't Bury Survivors.

Hah! Perfect.

I Don't Get It.

Rudy, Survivors Are Alive.

Oh, That's Perfect.

I Still Don't Get It.

Hey, Don't Anybody Go Out
Into The Living Room.

Dad's Playing Badminton.

Theo, How Would You Like
To Go Double Or Nothing

On Our Bet?

You Two Seem Pretty Confident,
So Take Your Best Shot.

Okay, This Is A Riddle.

If A Plane Crashed

Right On The Border Between
The United States And Canada

So That Half The Plane
Landed In The United States

And Half The Plane
Landed In Canada

Where Would You
Bury The Survivors?

Let's See, The Plane Crashes

Halfway Between Canada
And The United States.

Right.

What Nationality

Is The Pilot?

American.

Where Did The Luggage Land?

Half In Canada,
Half In The United States.

I Think I've Got The Answer.

What's The Answer?

Well, I'd Have To Say That
You Would Bury The Survivors

Nowhere

Because You Can't
Bury Survivors.

In Your Face, Jack.

How Did You Get That?

That Must Be
The Oldest Riddle In The Book.

That's No Fair.

You Heard It Before.

Hey, All That Counts
Is That I Got It Right

And That I Now Have
Two Weeks Of Bed-Making

By My Own Personal Valets.

And, Ladies, I Like
My Pillows Extra Fluffed.

Whoo!

Hello, Richard.

How Are You?

Well, I'm All Right.

Have A Seat.

May I Offer You Tea?

No, Thank You.

It's Certainly Good To See You.

We've Always
Gotten Along, Clair.

This Was Your Idea,
So I Gave It A Shot.

Well, Thank You.

Now What Is Wrong?

It's Pretty Simple.

Diane Goes On These Trips
For Three Or Four Days.

She's At These
Exotic Places

With Glitzy People,
And I'm Home Alone.

Don't You Think
When Diane's Away

She's Missing You, Too?

I Turn On The Television

And She's With Some Movie Star,
Laughing And Smiling.

She Doesn't Look Unhappy To Me.

Richard Doesn't Understand
What I Do For A Living.

I Understand Plenty.

You Hang Around
A Fast Crowd--

People Who Share
Each Other's Hot Tubs

And Change Wedding Rings
Like Most People Change Shoes.

What Makes You Think That?

Everybody Knows
About These People.

Like Who?

Everybody I Work With.

Who?

Like Roy.

He Reads The Enquirer
And The Globe.

He Shows Me These Articles.

So Roy Is Your Reliable Source?

Yes.

He Showed Me
An Article

On That Guy You
Interviewed Last Month.

That Guy On
A Soap Opera.

He Once Spent A Weekend

With The Wives
Of Three Of His Costars?

Why Would I Date
A Man Like That?

He Looks Ten Years
Younger Than Me.

That's Because He's Spent
Over $ ,

On Plastic
Surgery.

Really?

Roy Never Told Me That.

Richard, I've Never
Seen You Like This.

You Seem So Insecure.

I Do?

Yes, You Do.

Our Marriage
Is Wonderful.

Why Do You Think

I Would Jeopardize It All
To Be With Another Man?

I Don't Know.

I'd Be Miserable
Without You.

I'd Be Miserable
Without You, Too.

Will You Go With Me
To Talk To Somebody?

Okay.

I Think The First Person

You Should Talk To
Is Roy.

♪ Hai Loki, Hai Hai ♪

♪ Hai Loki, Hai Hai ♪

♪ Hai Loki, Hai Hai ♪

Dad, You Have Got To Hear This.

Oh, No, I'm Still On Vacation.

But It's : .

Yeah, You Said Your Vacation
Would Be Over : .

No, It Is : And Some Change.

I Still Have A Minute
And -Some Seconds Left.

Now Just Buzz.

♪ Hai Loki, Hai Hai ♪

♪ Hai Loki, Hai Hai ♪

Hey, How You Doing?

I'm Fine.

I Have A Minute And Seconds
Left On My Vacation.

Want To Play Shuffleboard?

No.

Aw, Come On.

You Can Do
Something.

How Was Your Meeting With Diane?

Great-- I Think
She And Richard
Will Work It Out.

Well, Good.

Just For Being A Good Person,
You Deserve A Treat.

Why Don't You Go Ahead,
Play With That?

Well, Thank You.

♪ Hai Loki, Hai Hai ♪

♪ Hai Loki, Hai Hai ♪

Hi, Mom.

Hi.

Dad, We Called
For The Correct Time.

It Is Now
Exactly : .

So Your Vacation Is Over.

Now We Have To
Tell You Something.

What Is It?

We Heard This Riddle
On Tv This Morning.

We Told It To Theo,
He Couldn't Get It

And We Won Our Bet Back.

We Got Him.

Congratulations.

Nobody Gets This One.

Yeah.

Really?

Just A Minute Now.

Just A Minute Now

Because You All Happen To Be
Talking About The Riddle Wizard.

Riddles Go In, But
They Don't Come Out.

If You're
The Riddle Wizard

Maybe You'd Like To Make
A Bet With Vanessa And Rudy.

Yeah, Dad.

If You Can't Get The Answer

You Have To Make Our Beds
For Two Weeks.

That's No Problem.

What Do I Get If I Win?

A Kiss.

Oh, Wonderful.

No, Please Don't
Take My Bubble Thing.

Here Goes.

Mr. Smith And His Son Arthur
Were Driving In A Car.

Mr. Smith And His Son Arthur
Driving.

The Car Crashes.

Mr. Smith Is k*lled Instantly.

His Son Arthur Is Rushed
To A Local Hospital.

Mm-Hmm.

The Old Surgeon Says:

"I Can't Operate On Him.
He's My Son Arthur."

Explain That.

Let's See...

Say It Again.

Mr. Smith And His Son Arthur
Were Driving In A Car.

The Car Crashes.
Mr. Smith Dies.

Arthur Is Rushed
To A Hospital

The Old Surgeon Says:

"I Can't Operate On Him.

He's My Son
Arthur."

That's Simple.

The Boy's Adopted.

No, It Was Mr. Smith's
Real Son.

Aha! Yeah.

The Old Surgeon Was
Afraid Of A Law Suit

So He Lied And Said
That's His Son.

Wrong.
Wrong.

Do You Give Up,
Riddle Wizard?

I Give Up.

Yeah!

Two Weeks Of Having
Our Beds Made By Dad.

Okay, But Wait!

What's...

I Like My Pillows Extra Fluffed.

Understood, But What Is
The Answer To The Riddle?

What Is The Answer?

I'm So Disappointed
In You, Cliff.

Here I Am Thinking
That You Believe

Men And Women Are Equal

And It Never Once
Crossed Your Mind

That The Old Surgeon
Was Arthur'smother.

Yeah, But You Know Why?

You Know Why?

I'm Serious Now.

The Reason Why...

Because If You Take
A Female Doctor

And Call Her "An Old Surgeon"

She'll Tear You Apart
For Calling...