03x13 - Monster Man Huxtable

[bunniefuu]

Okay.

Will You Please Tell Her
That Her Daughter Rudy Called?

Bye-Bye.

Who's On The Phone?

I Called Mommy, But She
Wasn't At Her Hotel.

Why Did You Call Her?

Because I Miss Her.

I Miss Her, Too

But She'll Be Home Next Week.

That's A Long Time.

If You Miss Mom, Why Not
Write Her A Letter?

I've Never Written A Letter.

Just The Thing!

Hot Dog!

We'll Write Mom A Letter, And
It Makes You Feel Better Inside.

When You Write
A Person A Letter

You Can Get Everything
That's In You Out, Okay?

So You Take That.

You Take That Pen...

You Take The Pencil
And You Start To Write.

So Put This Down.

You Say, "Dear Mom

"Dad Is A Wonderful Person
And He Cooks Wonderful Meals

And I Love His Singing
When He Sings The Lullaby."

What Are
You Erasing?

Your Singing Part.

You Don't Like My Singing?

Dad, It's Pretty Bad.

All Right. Then Sondra
Can Sing For You Tonight.

She'll Be Home Soon.

Is Elvin Coming, Too?

Yes.

Will They Be Fighting?

Fighting?

That's A Pretty
Strong Statement.

No. What They Do Is They Debate
About Everything All The Time.

You Mean "Fight."

Hey, Dad.

Look Who's Here.

Sondra!

Hi, Rudy.

How You Doing?

Fabulous.

How Are You, Sir?

Fine.

Everything
All Right?

And Your Drive Over?

Oh, Perfect.

No Arguments?

Of Course Not.

Why Would We Argue?

When You Argue, You
Lose Precious Moments.

Elvin, You're
So Sweet.

When Are You Going To Fight?

Oh, Rudy, Elvin And I
Don't Fight Anymore.

Good.

Come On, Let's Go
Upstairs And Unpack.

Bye, Muffin.

Bye. I'll Be
Down Soon.

Hurry.

"Muffin"?

It's A Nickname I Gave Her.
She Loves It.

Muffin Huxtable.

It Will Take A While
To Get Used To That.

I Know You're Not Used
To Seeing Us Like This

But Your Daughter Has Lifted Me

To The Heights Of
Emotional Awareness.

Really?

I Wish I Could Put Into Words

This Feeling I Have Inside.

Well, You Don't Have To.

Right Now I'm Like A Man

Standing On The Peak
Of A Snowcapped Mountain.

The Sun Beams Brighter,
The Sky Seems Bluer...

The Birds Sing Louder.

I Hope You And Mrs. Huxtable
Have Reached This Height.

I'm Still Climbing, Elvin.

I'm Still Climbing.

We Don't Even
Have To Talk.

I Just Hold
Her In My Arms.

We Each Know What
The Other Is Saying.

Sometimes...

Early In The Morning
She'll Look Out The Window...

Wait, Wait, Wait,
Wait, Wait, Wait.

This Is Early In The Morning?

Right.

How Early In The Morning?

Nine, Ten O'clock.

You See, Sondra Fixes Breakfast
And I Come From My Apartment.

Oh, You Come Over
From Your Apartment?

Oh, Yes.

Because Breakfast

Is The Day's
Most Important Meal?

Yes, Sir.

Hey, Dad.
Hey, Elvin.

Hi, Theo.

Look At This.

I Made The
School Newspaper.

Check It Out.

"Monster Man Huxtable
Wins Again.

"Theo Huxtable, The Newest
Member Of The Wrestling Team

Won His Fourth Match
And Remains Undefeated."

I Didn't Know
You Wrestled.

Yeah, I
Just Started.

In High School, I Was
A Pretty Good Wrestler.

You Were?

I Also Wrestled In College.

I Quit After Being Injured.

You Must Have Been Good.

Eighteen Wins, Two Losses.

Hey, That's Great.

Did You Know Dad Wrestled?

Really?

Well, I... ( Mumbling )

What Was Your Record?

They Didn't Keep Records
In Those Days.

Hi, Rudy.
What Are You Doing?

I'm Finishing
Mommy's Letter.

And It's Good.

It Should Be.

You've Been Writing
Since Yesterday.

Want To Read It?

Yeah.

Let Me See.

"Dear Mommy, I Miss You.

"Well, I Have
To Be Going Now.

Bye."

This Won't Do.

Why Not?

It's Not The Correct Form.

My Teacher Taught Us All
About It In School.

Will You Teach Me?

Gladly.

It's Important To Write
A Letter Properly.

A Good Letter Gives
A Good Impression.

I Want To Make
A Good Impression.

Then Listen Closely.

When You Write A Letter

You Must Pay Attention
To Structure.

Any Letter,
Business Or Personal

Must Contain
Five Essential Ingredients.

The Heading, The Salutation, The
Body, Closing And Signature.

Are You
Following Me?

Do I Look Like
I'm Following You?

Listen, The Heading Goes
At The Top Of The Paper.

It Contains Your
Address And The Date.

Mommy Already Knows My Address.

It Doesn't Matter.
Now Listen.

Next Is Salutation.

The What?

The Salutation.

It's A Greeting.

Okay.

Most Salutations Begin,
"Dear So-And-So..."

Who's So-And-So?

Mom.

Why Can't I Write,
"Dear Mom..."?

I Said To Write That.

Vanessa, You're A Lousy Teacher.

♪ And We Have Walked This Far ♪

♪ So Many Miles, So Many Hours ♪

♪ And Now We Know ♪

♪ And Only Now ♪

♪ Do We See Each Other ♪

♪ And We Have... ♪

Sondra.

Oh.

Hi, Daddy.

You're In A Good Mood.

Yeah, I Am.

Being Around Elvin Fills Me
With Such A Special Feeling.

Like Being On
A Snowcapped Mountain.

No.

More Like Running Barefoot

Through A Meadow Of Fresh Clover

Covered In The Morning Dew.

How Early In The Morning?

I'm Not Really
Running Through The Meadow.

It's A Symbol Of The Joy
I Feel When I'm With Elvin.

We Have
So Much

In Common.

How Many Men Do You Know

Interested In
Minimal Experimental Theater?

How Many Men Could Say It?

None.

Yes, You Do-- Elvin.

Oh! Oh, Elvin. Okay.

He Bought Us Tickets To The
Festival Of Experimental Artists

In Soho This Weekend.

That Devil!

Oh, Dad.

Yes?

I Feel Like

The Second Luckiest
Woman In The World.

Second Luckiest?

Sure. Mom's
The Luckiest.

Mmm!

Well, That's Wonderful.

You Ought To Come
Around Here More Often.

I'm Going To Make
Rudy A Bubble Bath.

Okay.

Yeah. Come Around Here
More Often.

Hey, Dad.

How Was Practice?

Good.

Good? Your Son
Is Too Modest.

He Was Outstanding.

Oh, Yeah?

Elvin:
He Pinned
His Man

In Seven Seconds.

Theo Anticipates His Man's Moves
Before He Moves.

You Don't Learn That--
You're Born With It.

Ah, So You're Saying
That He Inherited It.

Absolutely.

These Things Are Known
To Skip A Generation.

Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha.

Good One, Elvin.

I'll Restore The Family Name
By Winning All My Matches.

Hey, Theo, The Guy You're
Up Against Tomorrow

Is Undefeated And A Senior.

Do I Look Worried?

I Could Show You Some Things.

Elvin, He Already Has A Coach...

And He's A Good Coach

But I Know A Couple Of Simple
Techniques That Might Help.

Could We Work Out
In The Basement?

Okay.

Theo, Why Don't You
Get Changed?

Okay.

I'll Go Get
My Sneakers.

Elvin.

Yes, Sir?

I Want You To Know

That I Appreciate
What You're Doing.

You Do?

Yes, Sir.

What Am I Doing?

Well, My Daughter

Is Running Through The Meadow...

And My Son Is Learning
To Be A Better Wrestler

And I Just Want You To Know That

I Appreciate What You're
Doing For My Family.

I Love This Family.

Well...

Well, The Family
Loves You.

Yay-Hay!

Elvin:
Eight,
Nine, Ten.

Stop.

But I Could Do More.

That's Enough
Upper Body Work.

Let's Work On
Mental Tactics.

Mental Tactics?

You Want To
Keep Your Opponent

Psychologically On Edge
At All Times.

You Want To
Stare Him Down.

Like The Evil Eye?

No, Not The Evil Eye.

The Eye Of The Wolf.

It Lets Your Opponent Know

He Isn't Competing Against
Just Another Wrestler--

He's Doing Battle
With An Animal.

All Right.

Now Watch Me.

The Eye Of The Wolf.

You Try It.

Okay.

Right, Good. Now Growl.

( Growling )

No, Like This:

( Growling )

Good.
Louder.

Louder!

( Growling )

Louder!

Hey, Hey, Hey!

You Want To
Come And Have Dinner

Or Should I Throw
The Raw Meat Down There?

We're Doing
Some Drills.

We're Doing
Reflexes Next.

Don't Let Me Disturb You.

Good Reflexes
Are Essential.

I Want You To Put Your
Hands Out, Palms Up.

Try To Slap My Hand
Before I Move It.

I Can't Do It.

Few People Can.

You Were Supposed

To Restore The Family Name.

Why Don't You
Try It, Dad?

I Don't Think Your
Father Should.

Why Not?

Well, With All
Due Respect

It's A Scientific
Fact That With Age

A Man's Reflexes
Slow Down Considerably.

Just A Minute.

Hold... Hold On.

Step Over Here.

Now.

Okay, Come On.
Get Them Out.

All Right.
Now, You Hit Me.

You Want Me To
Hit Your Hand?

Oh, Yes.

Yes, Yes.

Just Get Them
Out There.

Okay, Here We Go.

That's One, Dad.

You Weren't
Ready For That.

No, I Wasn't
Ready For It.

Come On.
Here We Go.

Ee Jee Ee Jee.

That's Two.

What Are You Doing?

We're Doing A Reflex Test,
Of Which I Have None.

Elvin, You Better
Get Ready To Go.

Where?

Peter Mcnair Goes On At : .

Remember,
The Experimental Theater?

I Can't.

I Promised Theo My Help.

But We Drove All The Way
From Princeton To See This.

I Know How Much
This Event Means To You

But I'm Willing To Miss It.

That Should Show It's
Important I Work With Theo.

Elvin...

Elvin:
Yes,
Sondra?

If You Think It's More Important
For You To Stay Here With Theo--

Then I'll Understand.

Elvin:
It Is, Muffin,
It Really Is.

Okay, Then You
Really Should Stay.

Thank You.

Sondra:
Dad...

Would You Like To
See Peter Mcnair?

See Who?

Peter Mcnair.

He's A Performance Artist.

He Combines Acting
With Painting And Music.

Will There Be Jazz?

I'm Sure There
Will Be Some.

Okay, Sure.

It Will Be Fun.

Thank You.

Thank You.

Bye, Elvin.

Bye, Muffin.

Okay, Theo, Let's
Get Back To Work.

With Four Sisters,
I Never Realized

How Much I Missed
Not Having A Big Brother.

Well, If Your Sister And I Keep
Getting Along Like We Have Been

I Think You Might Be Getting
A Big Brother-In-Law.

Are You Serious?

( Growling )

All Right!

Aah!

Vanessa, I'm Finished
With My Letter.

Oh, Good.

Let Me Read It.

Don't Wrinkle It.

Well...

What's Wrong Now?

For One Thing,
You Signed "Love, Rudy."

So?

In The Body

You've Already Stated
"I Love You."

There Are Many Ways
To Close A Letter--

"As Always," "Warmest Regards,"
"Respectfully Yours."

Use One Of Those.

This Is Like Homework.

I'll Just Put Him
In A Half Nelson.

Not Before Your
Opponent Is On The Mat.

If He Has A Good
Step-Over Maneuver

He Can Escape.

Not My Half Nelson.

Anybody's
Half Nelson.

Every Move Has
A Counter-Move.

I'd Counter By
Pinning You.

No Way.

I'd Pin You In A Second.

Theo.

Here We Are.

Wrestle Here?

Here And Now.

Shouldn't We Go
Down To The Basement?

There's Too Much Junk
Down There.

Or Are You A...

( Clucking Like A Chicken )

Let's Move
The Furniture.

Come On,
Elvin!

Theo, Use
The Atomic Forearm!

Cliff:
Hey, Hey, Hey!

Sondra:
Elvin!

Couldn't You Find
Anything On Television?

We Were
Just Practicing.

Theo, You Would Have Won

If You Used
The Atomic Forearm.

I Don't Need
The Atomic Anything.

I'm An Invincible Monster Man.

You Mean A Monster Jellyhead.

( Growling )
( Scream )

Theo's Doing Really Terrific.

I'm Looking Forward

To Seeing Him Wrestle
Tomorrow Night.

Elvin?

Yes, Sondra.

You'll Be Where Tomorrow Night?

At The Wrestling Tournament.

Tomorrow Night We're Seeing

Peter Mcnair
And His New Age Orchestra.

I Know.
Maybe Your Dad Would Like To Go.

No, He Wouldn't.

It's Going To Be
Really Good.

That's Right.

His Whole Orchestra
Is Showing Up.

You Got To See It.

He'll Be There

And They Have All Their
Starter Pistols Ready To Go.

Let's Go To The Wrestling Match.

Peter Mcnair's
On A National Tour.

We'll Catch Him
When He Comes Back

To New York.

I Don't Know.

Muffin, It's Your Brother.

Okay, I'll Go.

Thank You, Muffin.

But It's A Shame To
Waste Those Tickets.

Who Can We
Give Them To?

Dad, Do You Know Any Friends
You Could Give The Tickets To?

Yes, And If I
Give Them To Them

They Won't Be My Friends
Anymore.

Who Are You Calling Now?

Mommy.

I Thought

You Were Writing
Her A Letter.

No, Come On Now.

I Thought You Were Going
To Write Her A Letter.

It's Too Hard.

What Do You Mean,
"It's Too Hard"?

I Don't Know Anything
About Greetings And Salivations.

What?

You Know, Salivations.

"Dear So-And-So,"
And "Respectably Yours."

Now Who Told You About This?

Vanessa.

She Wants Me To Write
An Adult's Letter

But I'm Only In Second Grade.

Here's What I'm Going To Do.

I'll Just Do This
One Time For You.

Tell Me What You Want To Say
And I'll Write It For You.

I Don't
Think So.

Mommy Says Your Handwriting
Is Like Chicken Scratches.

The Winner And Still Undefeated!

Thank You, One.
Thank You, All.

I'm Glad You Won,
But I Thought It Was Boring.

Nobody Wore Masks Or Capes
Or Hit Anyone With A Chair.

I Loved It.

You Did?

Yes, It Was So Expressive.

Two Wills Locked In Conflict.

It Symbolized The Struggle
Of All Men.

Exactly. That's Why
I Love The Sport.

It's Not Just
The Struggle Between Two Men.

It's The Ultimate Struggle--

Man's Attempt
To Control His Fate.

I'm So Glad You
Talked Me Into Going.

I Feel Enlightened
By The Whole Experience.

Only A Mind As
Beautiful As Yours

Could Allow Itself
To Be Enlightened.

Oh, Elvin.

Would You Like To Join Me
In A Soda, My Little Muffin?

Yes, My Little
Croissant.

Listen, I Don't Know
What They Saw

But I Know I Saw My Son
Jump On That Mat And Growl.

The Next Thing I Knew,
He Had Pinned The Guy.

I'm Proud Of You.

Thanks, Dad.

I Like Winning.
It Feels Great.

Yes, Indeed.

How Did You Feel
When You Lost Your Matches?

First Of All, Let Me Explain.

I Didn't Know What I Was Doing.

The Coach Didn't Give Me
Any Techniques.

I Went Out On The Mat,
I Looked At The Guy.

The Next Thing I Knew,
My Face Was On The Mat.

I Was Getting Burns All Over.

Then The Guy Stood Up
And It Was Over.

It Must Have Been Terrible.

Well, Yes And No.

Because After It Was All Over--

After I Showered And I Came Out
With Burn Marks All Over

Strawberries On The Cheekbones--

Your Mother Was Standing There.

And She...

She Kissed This Mark Here
And She Kissed That One.

Then She'd Slide Her Arms
Around My Waist

And Say,
"You're Still A Winner To Me."

So, Listen.

I Was One Of The Happiest Losers
Anybody Ever Wanted To Meet.

Did You Two Have
Little Nicknames For Each Other?

Yeah.

Did You Call Her Anything?

I Called Her Lum-Lum.

Lum-Lum?

Lum-Lum.

What Did She Call You?

Cakes.

Cupcake?
Beefcake?

Babycakes.

See You Later...

Babycakes.