02x03 - Martha Takes the Cake / Codename: Martha

[bunniefuu]

Ha was an average dog *

* She went... And... And...
(Barking, growls)

* When she ate
some alphabet soup *

* Then what happened
was bizarre... *

On the way to martha's stomach,
the letters lost their way.

They traveled to her brain
and now...

* She's got a lot to say

* Now she speaks...

How now, brown cow?

* Martha speaks, yeah,
she speaks and speaks *

* And speaks and speaks
and speaks... *

What's a caboose?

When are we eating again?

* Martha speaks...

Hey, joe, what do you know?

My name's not joe.

* She's not always right,
but still that martha speaks. *

Hi, there!

* She's got a voice,
she's ready to shout *

* Martha will tell you
what it's all about *

* Sometimes wrong
but seldom in doubt *

* Martha will tell you
what it's all about *

* That dog's unique...

Testing, one, two!

* Hear her speak

* Martha speaks and speaks

* And speaks and speaks
and... *

* Communicates, enumerates

* Elucidates, exaggerates

* Indicates and explicates,
bloviates and overtakes and... *

(Panting)

* ...hyperventilates!

* Martha, to reiterate...

Martha speaks!
* Martha speaks.

Ah, greetings, my friend!

Are you ready for
a show full of...?

Shh!

Full of words
about law and order?

Words such as: "innocence,"
"guilt," "plot," "evidence,"

(Shouts):
and "bias"!

Shh!

See how many words you can spot,

And I'll see you
at the end of the show.

Give that back,
you hoodlum! Ooh!

"Hoodlum" is another
word for criminal.

Uh, s-sorry...

T.d.:
I'm innocent.

I didn't do it.

You did, too.

You're guilty
as anything.

I'm not the one who took it.

I'm innocent.

Anyway, where's your evidence?

When I left, there was one
french fry on my plate.

When I came back,
there were none.

That doesn't prove anything.

Plus, there's a french fry
stuck between your teeth.

Rats. Where?

Actually, I made that up.

Aah, you win.

I did it.

Guilty as charged.

I warned you.

Alice:
hey, you guys!

Guess what?
You're all invited.

To what?

My birthday party!

(Screams)
oh, no!

(Static crackles)

"What has upset our young
friends?" You may be wondering.

Well, in scientific terminology,

Alice boxwood is what is known
as a ginormous klutz.

The signs were evident

By her second birthday.

(Inhales deeply)

Ahhh!

(Groans)
(groans)

Professor:
two years ago, alice had a
build-your-own-sundae party.

Ah! Cold!

(Screams)

(Shrieks)

Kids:
uh-oh.

Aah!
Cold!

(Static crackles)

Then last year
was the year of...

Miniature golf.

(Screaming)

Eh, could've been worse.

(Rumbling clatter)

Run for your lives!

(Screaming)

Alice boxwood's birthdays are
not for the faint of heart.

(Screaming)

Don't worry, it's
a simple costume party.

Everyone has to come dressed
as their favorite invention.

Martha, you're
invited, too.

Me? Really?
My first party!

I know just what invention
I'm coming as, too.

The doggie door!

Pets come and go as they please.

And look, ma-- no hands.

It's the greatest
invention since meat.

Here we are.

Wait, wait.

The party's
at alice's house?

What's wrong?

Nelson!
He-he lives here.

And that cat is trouble.

I'm sure you can handle one
little kitty cat, martha.

Well...

Helen:
come on.
You'll have fun.

Anyway, how much
trouble could he be?

Alice:
I hope you guys
are ready for this.

My parents really got into
the whole invention thing.

It's my own invention--

Lemonade to
the tenth power.

Yow! Sour! Ugh!

Alice:
they even hired
a robot birthday clown.

What kind of animal
do you like?

A wiener dog?

One wiener dog.

They finally invented something
scarier than a real clown.

(Balloon pops)

Hey, everyone!

Game time! Who wants to play
"pin the tail on the donkey"?

(Gasping)

I've got an even better game.

It's called
"give the dog a biscuit."

Martha:
make sure it's
good and tight.

I can't see a thing!

(Chomping)

A winner!

I didn't even start yet.

(Barking playfully)

(Meow)

Oh.
Hi, nelson.

What do you want?

(Meows)

Yeah. Dogs can pick up a lot
with their mouths.

So what?

(Meows)

Sure, I could pick up that rock.

(Meows)

"Prove it"?
No problem.

(Chomps)

(Muffled):
see?

No problem.

(Meows)

You? Aw...

Of course I could pick
you up. Easy.

What?!
What did I do?

(Meows)

You shouldn't bite nelson,
martha.

I didn't bite him!

I'm innocent.

Aw, poor nelson.

Look, there's slobber
in his fur.

Well, you try putting a whole
cat in your mouth and see if you

Don't get... Some... Uh...

This doesn't sound good,
does it?

(Moans)

I'm innocent!

They're all biased.

They assume I'm guilty
and the cat is innocent

Without even hearing
my side of the story.

Martha, I'm sure you weren't
trying to hurt nelson,

But ronald would feel better
if you stayed in here.

I've been framed,
I tell ya.

I've been falsely accused.

The cat set me up.

Look, you've had
a lot of biscuits.

Why don't you take a nap?
I'll come get you later.

All right.
I'll nap. But I won't like it.

This is totally...

(Snoring)

An electronic
piñata?

My dad says it's
the latest thing.

The only drag is...

Piñata:
felicidades! You win!

...the candy's
electronic, too.

Mrs. Boxwood:
oh, no!

What's the matter, mom?

Someone ate part
of your birthday cake.

Oh, honey, I'm sorry.

It's ruined.

Well, at least I didn't do it
this time.

Who could have done this?

Hmm, some animal, it appears.

Animal?
Hmm...

Aha!

Look.
Right in front of her.

Cake crumbs!

(Yawning)

Oh, hey.

(Slurping)
yum!

Admit it-- you're guilty.

You ate that cake.

(Slurping)

Cake? Where?!

Don't try to act innocent.

You ate my sister's
birthday cake.

She's innocent!
She wasn't there!

Anywhere near!
She was sleeping!

I'm hungry!
Quiet.

There's only one way
to find out the truth.

Put that dog on trial.

On trial?

It's the only way to find out
what really happened,

'Cause in a trial, you have
to tell the truth.

Aha!

I'll be the judge.

Oh, no, you won't!

We need someone who's not biased
to be the judge.

Who's biased? Me?

Obviously you're biased.

You've already made up your
mind that martha did it.

Truman, you be the judge.

The rest of us will be the jury,

And we'll decide if martha
is guilty or innocent.

Order in the court!

All right. Present your evidence

To the jury.

First off, we all know that cats
are better than dogs.

Dogs have fleas.

They stink...
Hey!

Order. Order!
That's not evidence.

Well, it's what's wrong
with dogs.

Evidence isn't
just your opinion.

Evidence is something
that would help prove

That martha's guilty
of the crime.

Evidence.

Like the cake crumbs,
you mean?

Precisely.

There were cake crumbs
around martha.

That proves she ate the cake.

It's an open and shut case.

Open and shut is right!

The garage door
was shut.

How could martha open it?

(Imitates dramatic music):
dum-dum-dum!

Ooh!

He's right.

I'm hungry.

(Bangs gavel):
order!

Then there's the matter
of those crumbs.

Martha, you like crumbs,
don't you?

That's true!

I call them floor food.

Why would martha
leave all those crumbs?

Answer: she wouldn't!

Obviously, someone wanted martha
to look guilty.

Someone who had it in for martha
from the very beginning.

Someone like...

...nelson!

Dum-dum-dum!

Ronald:
nelson?

How could he do it?

Just look at him.

He's so cute.

(Meows sweetly)

Aw! Qué lindo!

Well, it's true.

He is cute.

Hang on. You said a dog
couldn't open a door, right?

That's right.

Well, then,
how could a cat?!

He's right.
It's impossible.

I'm hungry!

(Mocking):
dum-dum-dum.

Yeah, well,
how do we know

That the door
was even opened?

What are you saying?

Uh... Oh! Wait! I know.

Here's how it went...

The cat ate the cake.

(Snoring)

Huh?

(Meows)

(Snoring)

(Sighs in relief)

So you see,
members of the jury,

The garage door never
had to be opened at all.

That's the most ridiculous
thing I've ever heard.

That dog is guilty.

She ate the cake!

(Pitiful meowing)

Hey, what's wrong with nelson?

(Nelson coughing)

Nelson!

Ew!
Gross!

Okay, I'm not
hungry anymore.

Look at this, you guys.

Ugh! What is it?

It's... A
birthday candle?

You ate my cake, nelson?

Maybe you should
take him to the vet.

He might have
swallowed more.

Good thinking, martha.

We got another cake!

Mom, we have to take

Nelson to the vet!

I'll explain on the way.

Now can we eat?

Has the jury
reached a verdict?

All:
not guilty!

You're acquitted,
martha,

And exonerated
of all charges.

Huh?

In other words, you're innocent.

In that case,
I declare this trial...

(Gasping)

Closed!

(Yells)

All:
ew!

Yum. What a party!

Thanks for coming
to my party, you guys.

Sorry about putting you
on trial and all, martha.

Oh, that's okay.
It was fun.

I'd still like to know how those
cake crumbs got in the garage.

You don't think nelson
actually...

All:
nah.

It's not possible.

I guess it'll just have
to remain a mystery.

Poor little fella.

Maybe I need to take an x ray
to make sure

You didn't eat any more
of those nasty candles. Oh!

He only ate one.

You witnessed him eat it?

Witnessed?

You saw it happen?

Oh!

I didn't witness
nelson eating the candle.

But I witnessed nelson
going into the house.

Uh-huh.

And I witnessed the candle
coming out of nelson.

He might have eaten
more candles.

Since you didn't actually
witness him eating.

Yeah, but my sister's only ten.

Huh?

And there were nine candles
left in the cake.

Ah.

So only one was missing.

Nine plus one makes ten.

Ten candles
on the birthday cake.

(Nelson throwing up)

And one to grow on?

Sorry you had
to witness that.

But helen,

I should be there.

You need me.

You know dogs aren't allowed
in the squiggy piggy mart.

It's the rules.

I'll be right back.

We should move to france.

French dogs get to go
everywhere.

They live like kings.

Kings!

Cookie...

Bow wow.

Yes! Doggies say "bow wow."

Can you say "doggy"?

Here. Let me clean
you up a bit.

(Giggling)

Ahem!

That's one smart baby
you've got there.

Tasty, too.

(Sighs)

Out of the way, you mutt.

I'm telling you, this job's
going to be a piece of cake.

Yeah, like taking
candy from a baby.

(Dreamily):
ah, candy... Mmm.

Take! Baby!

That poor baby.

Don't worry, baby!

No one's taking your candy
while I'm around.

Oh! Helen! Good!
Quick! Untie me!

We've got to stop a crime!

Crime? Whoa!

I overheard two men
discussing some plot.

There was candy and babies.
Cake!

We've got to act fast.

But...!

Too late!

They got all the cake

And probably that
poor baby's candy, too.

Duck!

Martha!
Nobody robbed this store.

It closed last month, remember?

Oh... Right.

(Yells)

You looking for
something, kid?

No. My silly dog thought
the store was being robbed.

Are you gentlemen
opening a new store?

What's it going to be?

Plumbing.
Flowers.

Flowers.

Plumbing flowers?

It's a flower shop
that sells plumbing stuff.

It's easier to keep your
flowers watered that way.

(Quietly):
hmm. Good one.

Now beat it, kid.
Will you?

I'm positive those guys
are criminals.

They were really
suspicious-looking.

Suspicious?

Yeah. It seemed
like they were lying.

I don't trust them.

And if that's not
suspicious enough for you,

They said they were going
to take candy from a baby.

Martha,

That's just
a figure of speech.

You know, an expression?

A funny way
of saying something.

Huh? Not following you.

Okay, "taking candy
from a baby" just means

You think something
is going to be easy to do.

But I'm positive those guys
are up to no good.

How can you be positive?

Plumbing-flower shop?

That doesn't seem
suspicious to you?

It's possible.

It's also possible that
they're plotting a crime.

We got to trip them up.

Whoa!

(Sheepishly):
oops. Sorry.

I think martha's right.

Something smells fishy.

Martha:
yeah?

(Sniffs):
yeah, that might be me.

I rolled in something earlier.

I thought it was frog,

But maybe
it was fish.

It's an expression.

If you say "it smells fishy,"

It means you think
it's suspicious.

(Barking)

Hey! Watch where you're going!

(Barks)

(Gasps)

I could so have caught it!

I'm busy thinking.

I'm trying to uncover a plot.

(Barking)

No. Not a plot of land.

A "plot" like a plan.

I think these guys
we saw are criminals.

And they're planning to commit
a crime, I'm sure of it.

Like they might be plotting
to rob a bank or something.

Ow!
Ow!

Believe me, the only thing
those guys are plotting

Is how to open
a plumbing-flower shop.

D.j. (On radio):
this just in! Police say

To be on the lookout for expert
safecracker louie kablooie

And his accomplice,
jimmy gimmie.

The criminals are believed to be
in the area plotting a robbery.

That jewelry store is
wide open for a hit.

Those two are louie kablooie
and jimmie gimmie.

I'm positive.

But if they're robbing
the jewelry store,

What are they doing
in this empty store?

You're right, that's...

Wait a minute, I know.

I saw it in an old movie.

The jewelry store is here.

And the empty store is here.

So what they're going to do is:

Go into the basement
of the store,

Dig a tunnel under the street

And right into the
jewelry store basement.

Then they torch a hole
in the safe...

And make off

With the stash.

I told you it would be
easy pickin's.

Pickings?

There are fruit trees
in the basement?

It's an expression.
It's an expression.

So what do we do?

Simple.

I'll sneak in there...
Mess with their map.

So instead of digging

Into the jewelry store,

They dig right into
the public swimming pool.

The second they hit the water,

It sloshes them back
through the tunnel...

And up through a manhole,
where we'll be waiting

With the cops.

(Siren wailing)

Tell me that's not
a perfect plan.

Helen:
one problem.

The pool is two blocks away.

They'd have to dig
for weeks to get there.

I'm willing to wait.

Maybe we should tell the police.

If we're going to
convince the police

That these guys are crooks,
we need some proof.

Proof?

You know, evidence--

Something that proves
they did the crime.

I've got an idea.

So what are you guys going to do
with that karaoke machine?

Sing until they surrender?

No.

This has a built-in camera

So you can make your own
music videos and stuff.

If those guys do
anything suspicious,

We can record it
and give it to the police

As proof they're criminals.

You guys sure that you want
to be my accomplices?

How are we going
to be accomplices?

Isn't an accomplice
a person

Who helps somebody else
do something wrong?

Well, snooping is wrong.

Yeah, but we're snooping
to stop a crime.

So it seems more like we're
partners than accomplices.

Okay.

Partners?

All:
partners.

(Yelling)

(Crash)

Hi, mom.

Aw...

Oh. Hey, be sure and get
my good side.

Martha!

Louie kablooie, eh?

This isn't like
when you thought robots

Had taken over the toy store,
is it?

No, sir.

We've got evidence.

But in my defense,
those robot costumes?

They were really good.

Just take a look.

We've got proof.

It's kablooie and his
accomplice, all right.

* Oh, where, oh, where
has my little dog gone? *

* Oh, where, oh, where
can she be? *

* With my ears cut short
and my... *

Okay, I've seen enough.

No. Wait.
You'll miss my big finish.

* Oh, where,
oh, where can she be *

(Imitating beat box):
* be-uh-e buh-buh-buh-
be-uh-ee... *

I don't know what happened.

I must have hit
the wrong track.

They're on here somewhere.

Sure, sure.

Look, don't worry about it.

We'll go by and check it out.

(Gasps)
(gasps)

How's it going?

All's quiet, chief.

Keep watching.

All evidence suggests

Kablooie is planning to rob
that jewelry store today.

He better hurry up.

An armored car is coming
at : to pick up the jewels.

If we're right
about this plot,

Kablooie should strike
in the next hour.

Oh, and try not
to be so obvious.

A couple kids
spotted you.

(Laughs)

They think
you're kablooie.

Huh? What's going on?

Why isn't he arresting them?

How much proof do they need?

Well, it's in the hands
of the police now.

Let's go home.

I can't just let those guys
rob the jewelry store.

I got to do something.

Kablooie's going to walk
right into our trap,

As long as things
stay nice and quiet.

Martha:
louie kablooie, come out
with your hands up.

I repeat.

Come out with your hands...
(Feedback)

* Be-uh-e buh-buh-buh-
be-uh-ee... *

Uh-oh.

You mean, you're a policeman?

Officer o'reilly is working
undercover with officer minetti.

They're trying to catch
kablooie and his accomplice

Robbing that jewelry store.

Gee.

I'm sorry I was suspicious
of you, officer.

I feel just awful.

Minetti:
there's the armored car.

Guess we were wrong
about kablooie.

A jewelry storeing
somewhere else.

Guess our work is done.

Oh...

Not only did I blow the case,

But I'm getting helen's toy
kind of slobbery, too.

(Gasps)

Holy sausages.

It's louie kablooie!

That... That's
louie kablooie!

Oh, no.
The police have gone!

There's only
one thing to do.

(Barking and howling)

(Barking)

(Chuckles)

See?

Piece of cake.

But boss...

I didn't get no cake.
I only got jewels.

Hey, it's just an
expression, you nitwit.

(Dogs barking)
what's all the racket?

Something's fishy.

(Sniffing)

(Barking grows louder)

(Both gasping)

(Barking and growling)

Way to go, leon.

Keep mr. Kablooie
and his accomplice in line.

Rinty, cisco,
grab those bags of jewels.

We'll need them as proof.

(Siren wailing)

(Barking continues)

Man:
our top story of the evening.

Today, the infamous robber
louie kablooie

Was apprehended by the police,

Along with his accomplice,
jimmie gimmie.

The police were overheard to say
that they were aided

In their surveillance efforts by
a secret crime-fighting partner.

They wouldn't reveal
the identity,

Saying she's only known

By her codename: martha.

Good evening and welcome
to the news.

Stunning developments today

In the trial of louis kablooie
and james "gimmie" moore.

Local dog martha testified.

She witnessed the pair
committing the crime.

Kablooie insisted he was not
guilty of robbing the bank.

Then he said:

"Actually,
I am not louie kablooie.

I am zor from the planet pluto."

"Oh yeah?" Said the judge.

"Well, I'm really justice man.

Pluto isn't even
a planet anymore."

"Oh yeah? Take that. And that.

And that."

(Helen clears throat)

Um... None of that happened.

The jury found kablooie guilty
and he went to jail.

That's all. Good-bye.

Ah, you're back.

Did you catch all of today's
words about law and order?

Evidence isn't just
your opinion.

Evidence is something
that would help prove

That martha is guilty
of the crime.

If we're going to
convince the police

That these guys are
crooks, we need some proof.

You know, evidence--

Something that proves
they did the crime.

I'm innocent.

They're all biased.

They assume I'm guilty
and the cat is innocent

Without even hearing
my side of the story.

Good-bye.

To dig up some more fun words
and games, visit p

* Whoo hoo

* So many shapes I use

* To make art with *

* When I want to draw

* I usually start
with a line, line *

* Circle, circle

* Square, square,
square, square *

* Triangle, triangle

* I'm sure that even
monet and da vinci *

* Had to start very simply

* When they learned
how to draw *

* Michelangelo, picasso,
and van gogh *

* All had to know
how to draw *

* Line, line

* Circle, circle
* circle, circle

* Square, square,
square, square *

* Square, square,
square, square *

* Triangle, triangle

* Triangle,
triangle *

* Line, line
* line, line

* Circle, circle
* circle, circle

* Square, square,
square, square *

* Square, square,
square, square *

* Triangle,
triangle, line *

* Triangle,
triangle, line *

* Triangle,
triangle, line *

Yeah!

* Whoo hoo