01x01 - Bud Takes Up the Dance

Episode transcripts for the TV show "Father Knows Best". Aired: October 3, 1954 - May 23, 1960.*
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The series, which began on radio in 1949, follows the lives of the Andersons, a middle-class family living in the town of Springfield.
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01x01 - Bud Takes Up the Dance

Post by bunniefuu »

Robert Young and Jane Wyatt,

with Elinor Donahue,

Billy Gray, and Lauren Chapin...

We missed you at dinner, dear.

Sorry you had to work so late.

Oh, it seemed like
everyone in Springfield

had insurance problems today.

Where are the children?

Kathy's next door,

Betty's at a sorority meeting,

and Bud's upstairs.

Ah, a quiet evening at home.

I can use it. Thanks.

Is it quiet? I don't know
whether I can concentrate or not.

What's that?

Oh, it's just Bud, dear.

Just Bud?

One boy couldn't possibly
make all that noise.

What's he doing,
anyway? I don't know.

Well, whatever he's doing,

we're not supposed
to know about it.

It's a secret.

That's a secret?

Sounds like the entire Springfield
football squad is up there.

"Weight should be
evenly distributed."

That does it. Now, now, Jim.

Bud!

Just a minute, son.

Something wrong?

What was all that
racket upstairs?

I didn't hear anything.

Sounds like you were
training a herd of elephants.

Well, I, uh, I was reading.

What do you do, turn a
handspring after every word?

Of course not.

Hello, Daddy! Goodbye,
Bud! Goodnight, Daddy!

Goodnight, Kathy.

Kathy! Goodnight, Dad.

Bud, where are you going?

I'm going over to Joe
Philips' for a little while.

I'll see you later, huh? But...

Find out anything, dear?

Oh, sure, everything.

And?

He said he was reading.

Bud's been acting very
strange the last few days.

He's been acting
strange since he was born.

This is different.

I'm worried. So am I.

I don't know which
is going to go first,

the ceiling or my nerves.

Father?

Father! I've got the
most exciting news.

Mother, you'll never believe it.

One thing I love
about this family,

everyone's always so calm.

What is it, Betty?
It's about Bud!

He's leaving home? Oh, Jim.

Well, you know the school dance

at the country club
next Friday night?

Well, Bud is going!

Bud's going to a dance?

Well, he doesn't even
know how to dance.

Not only that, he'd
have to take a girl.

He's taking a girl!

Bud?

Our Bud?

Our bashful, blushing boy, Bud?

Oh, no wonder he's
been so nervous lately.

I'll never forget the last time

he was supposed to
take a girl to a dance.

I don't think any of us will.

He made for the basement
like a scared gopher!

A grown boy hiding
in a basement.

He stayed down there so long,

I thought he was
going to mildew.

Who is he taking?

Oh, her name's Marcia.

She's Mrs. Lanson's
granddaughter.

Oh, she must be a new girl.

Yeah, she's just
here for the semester.

Bud with a girl.

Bud have a girl?
Get out of here.

About time old Bud got a girl.

Never mind, Kathy.

Here, I'll read you one story

and then off to bed you go.

Kathy, where did
you get this book?

Bud's room.

"Ballroom Dancing Self-Taught"

Margaret, look at this.

Read it to me, Daddy.

So, that's what
Bud's been doing.

Learning to dance from a book?

Bud, learning to dance?

Never mind, Kathy.

This book must be
over 50 years old.

The polka, the
waltz, the two-step.

Is that one of your
books, Father?

How old do you think I am?

This is a library book.

Listen to this, Margaret.

"As the movement of the
waltz is necessarily rapid,

"the danger of collision is
proportionately increased

and gentlemen will do well to
remember and act upon this hint."

This dancing's more
dangerous than I thought.

Does that mean I
have to be nice to him?

We all do.

It's a very serious situation

when a boy goes to his first
dance and has his first date.

Now, we'd better get
this up to Bud's room.

I'll take it. Oh,
oh, there he is.

Now, remember,

we don't know anything
about the dance or the book.

You understand, Kathy?

Yes, Daddy.

Welcome home, son.

How are you, Bud, dear?

Hi, brother!

I don't see why... Kathy.

Hello, Bud.

What did I do?

Uh, we... we're just
glad to see you, son.

Would you like some ice cream?

Or some milk?

No, I... I don't want
anything. I forgot something.

What'd you forget? Kathy.

Uh, why don't you stay down here

and talk to us a while?

What about?

Oh, anything.

Well, I... I'm busy.

I'll get it, I'll get it.

Now, Betty.

Can I quit smiling now?

No.

Yeah, it's me.

I was on my way over,
but I forgot the book.

Anyhow, I think the
family's getting suspicious.

You'd better make
it tomorrow night.

Oh, and Joe, I want to
warn you about one thing.

You know how it says
to glissade your left foot,

then slide the right one
back, turning half around?

It's a trap.

I tried already, so watch it.

Yeah, well, I'll
see you tomorrow.

Yeah, so long, Joe.

Bye.

Hello, brother.

What are you all
staring at me for?

Uh, we're not
staring at you, son.

Of course not, dear.

I was.

Uh, who called?

Joe.

How's Joe?

You are so staring at me.

We just like to
look at you, son.

Uh, you and Joe
cooking up something?

Uh, a little
footwork. For boxing.

Good exercise, son.

Nothing like being able to
defend yourself in a clinch.

Yeah.

Does Marcia like to box?

What? What'd she say?

She... She just...

wants to know if there are any
marshmallows left in the box.

Well, goodnight.

Goodnight.

Well, Little Louella,
you did it again.

This is the first breakfast

Bud's missed in 14 years.

He's certainly taking
his dancing seriously.

He's been up since
dawn practicing.

How long do we have to pretend

we don't know anything?

This is a situation that has to be
handled with the utmost diplomacy.

That means you too, Kitten.

I haven't said anything.

I don't see why going to
a dance is such a project.

It can be for a boy.

I remember my first dance.

You'll never know the
agonies I went through, Betty.

I was scared to death.

If Bud is just half as
frightened as I was,

he's in bad shape. He
might even collapse.

If he does, we'll be
there to hold him up.

We'll be there?

Well, the principal
called this morning,

and asked us to be
patrons at the dance.

Oh, Margaret, we can't do that.

If Bud thought for one moment
we were going to be there,

he'd... he'd disintegrate.

But I can't get
out of it now, Jim.

Well, if we have to go, I
think Bud should be warned.

He's having enough
trouble as it is.

I'm going to be
completely honest with him.

I'll go up and tell him now.

Remember the basement?
Just leave it to me.

I'll be as diplomatic
as possible.

Bud.

Yes, Dad?

May I come in a minute?

Uh, yeah, I guess so.

Bud... Old man. Uh-oh.

I think it's time you
and I had a little talk.

Dad, I've got a lot on my mind,

and I'd rather not have a
father-son talk right now.

But there's something I
think you should know.

We've been all
through this before.

I'm talking about
the dance, Bud.

Dance? What dance?

The dance you're going to.

You know about it?

Yes. Your mother and I
are going to be there too.

You're going to be there?

Now, there's no reason
to be embarrassed about it.

And as far as you're
taking Marcia's concerned...

You know about her too?

Yes, and we
all feel that it's...

Great jumpin' jeepers.

Bud!

There he goes again.

Bud, come back!

Bud!

Bud, come out of that basement.

Please, Bud.

Mommy?

What does diplomatic mean?

It's the art of
being able to say

the right thing at
the wrong time.

Try again, Jim.

Oh, Bud!

There's nothing wrong in
learning how to dance, son.

We'll help you learn to dance.

I'm never going
to learn to dance.

Please, Bud.

No!

We may have to smoke him out.

Sissy! Yeah, yeah, yeah! Sissy!

Kathy!

He'll have a relapse after that.

Bud, I'll ask you once more.

Are you or are
you not coming up?

I are not!

It's no use, Jim. He
just won't come up.

Something has to be done.

Well, we can't drag him
up and order him to dance.

Oh, it isn't just the dancing,

he's running away from a
problem instead of facing it.

If he retreats to the basement

over some little thing
now, it isn't so bad.

But he's going to look awfully
silly running down to the basement

every time something goes
wrong when he's 50 years old.

Mother, the bakery
man's in front.

Thanks, dear.

Looks like Marcia had
better find herself another boy.

Betty, uh, what kind of
a girl is this, uh, Marcia?

Oh, she's been around a lot.

Europe and everything.

Her folks have a lot of money.

I've never seen her, but
she must be quite a fireball.

Fireball? What do you mean?

They call her Dynamite.

Well, then, what does
she want with Bud?

Oh, you know how
some women are, Father.

They'll go after anything
that's a challenge.

Bud is a challenge?

To a woman like this, he is.

Now, you know, anyone as innocent
and naive as your son and my brother

is probably just her dish.

I can't imagine
Bud with a fireball.

♪♪

She probably wants to
add another scalp to her belt.

Then she'll have to find
herself another victim.

What are you going to do?

I'm going to do a
little atomic research.

Oh, believe me, Mrs. Lanson,

I don't usually like to
interfere in matters of the heart,

but I don't think Bud is
your granddaughter's type.

From what I've
heard about your son,

I'm sure my
granddaughter isn't his type.

Is she really that... that...

She's a problem.

What about her
parents, where are they?

They're in Europe.

Marcia has been there so
often, she didn't want to go again.

She said she was bored.

Bored with Europe?

Poor Bud.

No wonder she's
desperate for amusement.

Basically, she's
a very fine girl.

She's just a little...
well, peculiar.

I want to talk to
her, Mrs. Lanson.

You can try, but it
isn't going to be easy.

Sometimes a stranger can
handle a situation like this

better than a
member of the family.

This way, Mr. Anderson.

I have children of my
own, so I'm used to...

Marcia.

Mr. Anderson is here to see you.

Marcia!

She's in the basement? Yes.

Marcia.

Where are you?

I'd like to meet
you, I'm Bud's father.

Here I am.

Hello.

You're Marcia?

You don't have to
be afraid of me, dear.

Oh, I'm not afraid of you. I...

I'm just embarrassed that
you found me hiding here.

Now, why would you
want to hide from anybody?

Well, your son asked me to
go to a dance with him, and...

And I said I'd go, but...

I don't know how to dance.

You don't know how to dance?

Not a step, I...

Grandma Lanson said she was going
to have Bud come over to teach me.

I didn't want her
to, but she insisted.

Oh, Mr. Anderson,

I'd be mortified if Bud
found out I couldn't dance.

Well, you could have told Bud.

Believe me, he
would've understood.

Tell Bud I can't dance?

Bud, the Gene
Kelly of Springfield?

The guy that every girl is
just dying to go out with?

This is Bud?

Oh, Mr. Anderson.
This boy is dynamite.

I'm a little confused.

I thought you were Dynamite.

Oh, well that's just
my nickname, you see,

I'm on the debating
team at school, and...

And when it's my
turn for the rebuttal,

well, they say I
sort of explode.

It's pretty dull, isn't
it, being a debater?

Well, not every girl has the
talent to be on the debating team.

Some of our greatest
people started out as debaters.

But... But I don't
want to be great I...

I just want to learn how to
dance by... by Friday night.

Marcia...

how would you like
to have me teach you?

You?

Oh, I'd like that.

But, you wouldn't tell
anybody, would you?

Not a soul, I promise.

This is our secret.

Now, the first thing you do,

is glissade to the
left, with the left foot.

May I have this
waltz... Dynamite?

Put your hand there. That's it.

Now, one, two,
three, one, two, three,

one, two, three,
one, two, three...

Bud Anderson, I want you to
come up here right this minute!

What for?

Never mind, just get up here!

Where's Kathy?

She's outside, and I'll
see that she stays there.

Now, cut out this foolishness,
and unlock this door!

What do you want?

You're going to learn to dance.

Not me. Now, look son.

You're too cool to act this way.

All the other boys will be out

dancing and having fun,
and where will you be?

In the basement!

There she is!

Wait a minute!
Bud, Kathy, be quiet!

Margaret! One of us has to go!

I'm not going to live in the
same house with that shrimp...

Margaret, get rid of Kathy.
Kathy, you go out and play.

Go on.

Now, come in the
living room, son.

Oh, come on, Bud.

I'm not going to like this.

Whether you like it or not,

you're going to learn to dance.

And I'm going to
see that you do.

You?

Dance with my father?

Betty will teach you.

Dance with my sister?

Either that,

or I'll get Marcia over here
and have her teach you.

You wouldn't. I would.

It's a conspiracy.

One, two, three.

Right, one, two, three.

One, two...

Bud, can't you get it
through your head?

It's one, two, three.

Where's four?

There isn't any four.

It's one, two, three.

Now, one, two, three.

Now, see how easy it is?

No.

Oh, don't hang on me, hold me.

You're my sister.

Oh, come on. One, two...

Glissade, son, glissade.

You want me to k*ll myself?

You're getting it, Bud,
you just got to relax.

One, two, three...

There's the monster again!

Kathy, get away
from that window!

She belongs in the
zoo, or something.

We've lost him again.

Betty, maybe if you
showed me the step,

Bud would see how easy it is.

All right, Father.

Now, there's nothing to it, Bud.

Now, watch.

I'm watching.

Ouch! Oh, I'm sorry, Princess.

Easy, isn't it, Dad?
Nothing to it, huh?

I missed on four.

There isn't any four.

Uh, m-maybe you've just
forgotten how to dance, Dad.

Glissade, Dad, glissade.

I'm getting it, I'm getting it.

You look like you're trying
to dance on your knees!

You should see yourself, Dad!

I suppose you can do better?

Well, I can do better than that.

Come on, Betty.

I'm just a little out
of shape, that's all.

First you got to stand
up straight, like this.

And relax when
you take the steps.

Well, you don't have
to relax that much.

Hey, this glissade
stuff's all right.

Mother, I think you'd better dance
with Dad, and show him how it's done.

Maybe I had.

One, two, three,

one, two, three,
one, two, three,

one, two, three...

Jim.

You tricked poor
Bud into dancing.

I had to do something,
or get a bigger basement.

It worked, he's dancing.

Sometimes I amaze myself.

One, two, three...

One, two, three,
one, two, three...

They haven't missed
a dance all evening.

First time I've ever seen
the rumba done in waltz time.

I think you're the most wonderful
dancer in the whole world.

I wouldn't say the whole world.

But you're so easy to follow.

That's because
you're so easy to lead.

Seems to be something
slightly old-fashioned

about Marcia's
style of waltzing.

What do you mean, old-fashioned?

It's just surprising that she seems
to dance the same way Bud does.

Maybe she read the same book.

♪♪
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