09x09 - D.W. Beats All/Buster the Myth Maker

[bunniefuu]

# Every day you walk down the street Everybody that you meet

# Has an original point of view

- # And I say, hey!
- Hey!

# What a wonderful kind of day We can learn to work and play

# And get along with each other

# You gotta listen to your heart Listen to the beat

# Listen to the rhythm of the street Open your eyes! Open your ears!

# Get together, make things better By working together

# It's a simple message And it comes from the heart

# Believe in yourself For that's the place to start

- # And I say, hey!
- Hey!
- What a wonderful kind of day

# We can learn to work and play And get along with each other

# What a wonderful kind of day, hey! What a wonderful kind of day, HEY! #

Hey, DW!

- Hey!
- Whoaaa!

There.

All sorted.

CRASHING

CRASHING

Ouch!

CRASHING What is that?

Ow!

CRASHING

- Was that an expl*si*n?
- Earthquake?

- Aliens?
- You really think so?

No, but I knew you'd say that.

It's coming from behind that fence!

- Uh-oh.
- Oh no!

Ta-da!

Aren't they cute?

I found the drums at a garage sale.

Now the twins can play in the Summer Serenade.

- Summer Serenade?
- Haven't you heard?

The parks department is having a summer music festival.

Anyone can play.

There'll be music, sing-alongs

and, at the end, fireworks.

Only no-one will hear them. We'll be too loud.

We'll turn that serenade into a noisappaloosa.

Noisappaloosa!

You guys thinking what I'm thinking?

- Ear plugs?
- No, we should play in the Summer Serenade.

- We can practise at my house.
- Can I try?

No way! Go play with your baby toy.

Baby?

I'll show you!

Our drums!

What happened?

THEY SOB

I'll never be as loud as DW!

HE SOBS

My parents are going to get me even bigger drums!

- No.
- What?

Arthur has a piano

and all he does is this.

If you really want to play drums, you can have lessons.

I don't need lessons! I need drums!

Besides, I can't waste time on lessons.

I only have until Saturday. I need drums now!

I'm sorry, DW, but you can't have everything you want.

Well, this is a fine time to tell me.

That was the Tibble twins with the drum set their grandmother gave them.

And now...DW Read and her crummy little tambourine!

CROWD BOOS

I'll show those Tibbles. I'll find something to play.

And it's going to be louder than drums.

MUFFLED MUSIC

It sounds better.

I could hit the notes better after a snack break.

- Dad put some stuff in the kitchen.
- Race you!

I bet something here is louder than the Tibbles.

Tuba!

Too hard.

Pretty!

TWINS LAUGH

Look at DW's little whistle!

PIERCING NOTES

Aaargh, make it stop!

Which hole do you blow in?

Too holey.

Maybe if I just play with brushes we can hear the piccolo better.

BANG!

DW! Stop!

Stop!

- Wasn't I loud enough?
- You were plenty loud.

- You almost broke them.
- There's a difference between noise and music.

Here, listen to this.

You have to learn to play the drums, like the piano or any instrument,

but it takes practice.

Drums are the only instrument I can get a sound out of

and even they take practice! If I can't have drums

and I can't practise, how am I ever going to show those Tibbles?

It's useless.

I'm never going to find anything I can play on Saturday.

What is it, Kate?

SNIP! SNIP! Clippers? Is that what you hear?

CHOP! CHOP! That's just Dad.

BOING! BOING!

SLOSH! SLOSH!

BEEP! BEEP!

That's it, Kate! You're a genius!

SNIP! SNIP! BOING! BOING!

That little combo sounded great today. What will you call your band?

We've used U Stink and We Stink.

There aren't any good names left.

Well, how about...

PLINK! PLINK! DW, what are you doing?

Listen!

Now listen to this. PLONK! PLONK!

They're completely different sounds.

Oh.

DW, please stop playing with your food.

I'm not playing WITH it, Mom.

I'm playing it!

Hmmm...

Baby Kate, you don't understand! I need this!

Waaaaa....!

DRRRING!

- It's broken. It always stops on the cow.
- I have to have that!

Could I have some of that to put on the bottom of my shoes?

Maybe we could start really quietly and then get louder and louder

until...

Sounds wrong. Wrong...

KATE CRIES Hey, a little higher...

Don't stop crying now!

Oh, this is hopeless!

Ma-ma!

Yes!

- What's happened to her?
- I know how to get her back to normal.

DW, Mary Moo Cow is on!

I'm too busy for that!

Hmm...

DOOR CREAKS That's good. That's very, very good.

HAPPY MUSIC

That was the Summer Sensations! Let's hear it!

- What's that?
- It's my drum set.

Drum set!

Those aren't drums!

Our next Summer Serenaders

here on this gorgeous afternoon

not only look alike

but they play the same instrument.

Let's welcome the Tibble twins!

Now you'll hear some real music!

BANGING AND CRASHING

OK, I think we've all heard enough.

Tommy and Timmy Tibble, everybody!

Next up, we have DW Read, playing...

Oh, another percussionist!

Come on, we're getting out of here. I can't take any more of this.

This is going to be horrible!

Talk about embarrassing!

BEAT BEGINS

SCRATCH! SCRATCH!

SQUEAK!

TINKLE! TINKLE!

SQUEAK!

- Ma-ma! Ma-ma!
- A cow goes...

Moooooo!

- Ma-ma!
- Moooooo!

A cow goes...

Moooooo!

- Ma-ma!
- Moooooo!

A cow goes... Baaaaaa!

Moooooo!

Wow, she's really good!

Baaaaaa!

SOUNDS SLOW DOWN

SLOOOOOOSH!

That was DW Read, ladies and gentlemen! Let's hear it!

That was awesome, DW. Thanks.

DW, they want you to take another bow!

CROWD CHEERS

TWINS: DW! DW!

Can you teach us to play the bottles? Please! Please! Please!

You can have all my bottles. ] We can?

But you can't just bang. Playing the drums takes practice.

What are you gonna play now, DW?

Oh, don't worry. TING! TING!

I'm building an even bigger one.

One pack of Crinklechaw bubblegum, please.

Sprinkles of crinkles!

That's cents.

I used to like Crinklechaw too until I found out the crinkles

are grasshopper eyeballs.

So much for that sale.

- You're kidding, right?
- It's public information.

There are factories in Japan where they pluck the eyeballs off...

or is it France?!

OK then. I'll have a bag of Red Rovers.

Your call. But you know how they get that bright red colour, right?

Buster! You're putting us out of business here!

I'll just have a grape drink.

I heard a couple of months ago,

this guy who found a rat in a bottle of grape drink,

and the company gave him a million dollars!

Where does Buster get all this stuff?

The new album rocks!

Nobody will have a clue that I, Johnny Crude,

secretly quit Mood-a-Crude months ago.

Not unless they listen to the secret backwards message on track !

And especially not with me, Jeanie Crude, ]

your secret identical twin, filling in for you on drums.

They were separated at birth.

They never even knew about each other.

But it's all secret.

- TOGETHER:
- Wow!
- Amazing.

If they were separated at birth, why are they both named Crude?

Hey! I heard an amazing story too.

One day, this guy was out fishing on a lake.

Oh, oh, oh!

Ah! Gotcha!

Ouch!

Hey! He got my ring.

A whole day on the lake, and all I have to show for it

is a lost...

His ring was in the fish he'd just ordered!

It was the same fish!

That's, um, pretty neat, Arthur.

Who wants to play some basketball?

Was my story really that boring?

No, but it would have been much cooler

if it were about someone famous,

or had some special inside information.

Where would I get a story like that?

You have to visit a lot of different sites

to get the real insider stories.

There's a website called,

Embarrassing Secrets About Movie Stars"?

Oh yeah. They're a great source.

Hey, did you know Kieren Moody from snowboard patrol

has six fingers on each hand?

"The Gross Ingredients In Junk Food" website?

That site's pretty scary. Not for the faint of heart.

It says here that the shakes at the Chickin Lickin'

are made of chicken fat.

Buster, how do you know if any of this stuff is true?

What do you mean?

How do you know someone didn't make it up?

What? You mean just lie?

You really think someone would do that?

Just go on the internet and tell lies?

I just mean that some of the details...

Whoa... I never thought of that.

This is terrible. What if none of it's true?

What if they're all lying? How would we ever know?

Well... snowboard patrol is almost done.

We could do some research on Kieren Moody's six fingers.

LOUD HEAVY METAL MUSIC

WHOOSH!

OK.

One. Two. Three.

Aww, I can't count his fingers with those ski gloves on.

- ARTHUR YAWNS
- That's enough research for one day.

Arthur! I just found out the most amazing story.

It's right here in Ellwood City!

But it's a secret and nobody else can know.

Then, why are you shouting?

Oh, right.

I read on this website, "Ultra Wacky Animal Stories",

that last year, the Ellwood City Zoo started this programme

to preserve the endangered Siberian tiger.

One male and one female were shipped to Ellwood City,

but the airline got the boxes mixed up and instead,

they got shipped to a farm outside Ellwood City.

GRRRR!

You sure this is that prize milk cow from Wisconsin?

GRRRR!

Sweet Shirley Temple!

Yaaahhaa!

GRRRR!

So these tigers are still around somewhere!

They're probably in Turkey Hill Park.

Siberian tigers? Here? Buster...

Didn't you hear on the news about those dogs disappearing?

Maybe this is why! We should at least try to find out if it's true.

If it is, it'll be the biggest story ever!

Uhhh!

Correct! If there were Siberian tigers living outside Ellwood City,

it would be the biggest story ever.

So, do you think there are any?

Let's put it this way.

I've never heard of any evidence to suggest so.

Aha! It's possible then?

Well, ha ha, I guess anything's possible, Buster.

But what about all those dogs disappearing in Turkey Hill Park?

That is a bit of a mystery.

Tell you what.

I'll see if Clarisse from Turkey Hill Park can meet you.

We've got Canada geese, Rocky Mountain elk,

Carolina chickadee, Virginia Creeper and European widgen...

But to my knowledge, nobody's ever spotted Siberian tiger.

What if they were hiding in a giant underground cavern?

They'd have to come out to hunt.

GASP!

Those poor dogs!

They're probably just getting lost.

We advise people to keep dog's on leaches!

(She's hiding something.)

Have you ever been to, er, China?

No, but I'd love to go some time.

Aha!

OK. Thank you for your time!

Aww, you always want to leave when we're getting somewhere.

Buster, nobody believes there are Siberian tigers in Turkey Hill Park!

GASP!

Arghh!

CRASH!

That was a tiger hunter. ]

% tiger hunger.

You don't know that. It could have been a...

umm...

Arthur! What more proof do you need?

There are tigers in Turkey Hill Park,

and the rangers don't want people to know!

Why would they do that?

They don't want to scare people away.

That doesn't make any sense.

There must be another explanation.

PHONE RINGS

- Hello?
- I imagine right about now you are looking for an explanation.

- Who is this?
- Meet at the ice cream shop in half an hour

and I will explain everything.

Which one do you think we're looking for?

I'm not sure but I've got a hunch.

I'll have a root beer, please.

Yes, Mr Deep Float, right away.

THEY WHISTLE

So, you want to know about the tigers, huh?

- Why are you wearing a mask?
- I know too much.

There are people who'd like me out of the picture.

- People like...tiger hunters?
- It's not true. Right, Mr Deep Float?

Tell Buster there are no Siberian tigers in Turkey Hill Park.

Hahaha!

- HE SLURPS
- Tigers are the tip of the iceberg.

You mean there's something bigger than tigers out there?

Much bigger.

We're talking about a sinister menagerie

of chromatically inappropriate vertebrae.

You lost me there.

Weird animals. Right here - in Ellwood City.

Rattlesnakes in sidewalk cracks, scorpions in shoeboxes,

sharks in swimming pools.

The zoo is the key. Just follow the monkeys.

Would anybody like to try my new flavour. Peaches and crab. ]

Here, have a taste, Alan.

TOGETHER: Brain!

Mom! I asked you not to blow my cover.

Oh no! I forgot.

What's going on?

- Brain, do you know something about the tigers or...
- Tigers?

What's this about tigers?

There are no tigers.

I made it all up, OK?

- I knew it!
- But why?

It was an experiment.

I wanted to see if someone could invent a story people would believe

without one shred of truth.

So I posted it on that "Ultra Wacky Animal Stories" website.

Allan! That's not a very honest thing to do.

And you even hired an actor to pretend to be a tiger hunter? Wow!

I'm impressed.

Tiger hunter? What tiger hunter?

There's this guy in the park with a trap.

You didn't...

The serial dognapper was arrested today in Turkey Hill Park,

where he had stolen dozens of Ellwood City dogs

over the past year. Isn't that right, Ranger Vebert?

That's correct. Anyone who lost a dog up here in the past year

please come pick it up.

Please! They're very noisy!

There are have been related reports

that the park may be home to a pair of Siberian tigers. Any comment?

You're not serious, are you?

Hey Buster! They've got snacks here for the TV crew.

Want an Moogie Bar?

You know how they get the tingly-tasting filling

in those things, right?

How, Buster? Mashed snake livers?

Pureed spider webs?

Snail grease?

Pig brains?

No. They use a chemical called sodium benzoate.

How about an apple?