04x03 - Baking Bad

[bunniefuu]

Raven:
"Raven's Home" was filmed

in front of a live
studio audience.

Okay, g*ng, now
that it's summer,

and we've graduated from
Carver Middle, it's official.

Goodbye, Peanut Page.
Hello, Friendspace.

[cheering]

Add me, guys.

Booker/Nia/Tess:
Ooh...

Yeah, here's
the thing, Levi.

This app is for
high schoolers only.

Awkward...

So, I'm stuck with
my Peanut Page,

and you guys are all on
the cool new high school app?

Hey, don't worry,
Kiddie Pool, okay?

I'll help you work on your
profile so you can glow up

until you grow up.

You'll get all the pals
you need.

Ah. The old passage
of time, eh?

Hm.

And if you would the old
passage of jam, Rae.

Oh. This jam?

- Yeah, that jam.
- Girl, that's my jam.

- Yeah, it is.
- That's my jam.

- Yeah, it is!
- That's my jam!

- Th-that's my jam! That's my jam! That's my jam!
- What! What!

Listen, kids...

why don't you put
your phones down

- and go outside and get some fresh air?
- Oh yeah!

Uh, Mom, we're outside.

Oh, um,

okay, well then,
why don't you go downstairs

- and get me one of those fresh muffins from Maren's Mocha?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Maren's is closed
on Sundays, Ms. B.

Tess...

it's Tuesday.

It is?

- Summer is wild!
- Booker: No way!

Mom, it's Wednesday.

- What?
- [gasps] We gotta get to work!

- ♪ Hey ♪
- ♪ Yo ♪

♪ Let me tell you somethin' ♪

♪ Had my vision
all worked out ♪

♪ But then life
had other plans ♪

♪ Tell 'em, Rae ♪

♪ It's crazy when things
turn upside down ♪

♪ But ya gotta get up
and take that chance ♪

- ♪ Maybe I'm just finding my
way ♪ -♪ Learning how to fly ♪

- ♪ Yeah, we're gonna be okay ♪
- ♪ Ya know I got you, right? ♪

♪ It might be wild, but ya
know that we make it work ♪

♪ We're just kids
caught up in a crazy world ♪

- ♪ C'mon! ♪
- ♪ It's Raven's Home ♪

- ♪ We get loud! ♪
- ♪ It's Raven's Home ♪

♪ It's our crowd! ♪

♪ Might be tough,
but together we make it look good ♪

♪ Down for each other
like family should ♪

- ♪ It's Raven's Home ♪
- ♪ When it's tough ♪

- ♪ It's Raven's Home ♪
- ♪ We got love ♪

♪ 'Cos no matter the weather,
ya know we gon' shine ♪

♪ There for each other,
ya know it's our time ♪

[Raven laughing]

Yep! That's us.

[laughing]

♪ ♪

Okay. The first thing

people see online is
your personal deets.

I hyped you up a bit,
now all you gotta do is live up to it.

Okay.

Yeah, how am I supposed
to live up to the hype

of being five-five?

Can't do it all
for you, Bento Box.

Hey, guys, I just
got one of those

"friends you may know"
suggestions

from Ava's Flavors.

Yeah. I mean, she's got
recipes, restaurant reviews.

- Why am I getting this?
- Well, we are in a cafe,

so maybe
the algorithms?

Those are the worst
kind of rhythms!

Wait, no, you got it
because it's Nia's blog.

My what? No, guys,
I don't have a blog.

No, Levi's right,
Nia. It's you.

Uh, that pic is from
your Peanut Page.

But why would somebody
be using my picture?

Oh, that picture.
Okay, I get it. I look good.

Nia, this is crazy.

Why aren't you more upset?
Doesn't this worry you?

Well yeah,
of course it does.

But, if you post a photo
online, it's public.

Besides, she's just
writing a blog.

I mean, she's not
hurting anyone.

Hi. Uh, excuse me, can I
please have one turnover?

Mm-hmm.

Coming right on up. Not.

So, I saw your
funky little review.

You said my scones
were as dry as bones.

[laughter]

Nia, your blog
is hilarious!

Ya burnt!

Not helping.

Ms. Maren,
that isn't my blog.

That's some girl named
Ava who's using my photo.

I don't care what name you use.
Nia, Ava, Shady Lady.

You're banned.

Oh no, but I come here,
like, every day.

Not anymore, missy.

Look, I'm hosting a little
bake-off here in a few days,

and last thing I need is you
and all your bad press.

So, out.

[clears throat]

- Well, you know what,
I'ma get one of those... - Really?

You know what? I...

I am going to have justice

w-with a side order

of solidarity
with my sister.

Alright,
just so we're clear.

My heart's with Nia,

but my stomach really
wants a cake pop.

♪ ♪

- Hey, Rae.
- Hey.

Oh! Thanks for crunching
the numbers, Rae.

You know I'm not
good with the, uh...

the math.

You don't have to be good
with math to know that

these boas aren't selling.

And I don't know why!

They're so cute.
You are so cute!

Yes, you!

You are amazing!
You are beautiful!

You are fantastic!

You must be Chelsea!

Oh, um, well...

Hi! I'm Mei. Were you
doing your affirmations?

Something like that.

My friend is a client.
She said, "Oh, Mei,

"you have to get your
life coaching from Chelsea

- at Your Best Dressed Life."
- Yes.

You should,
but I am not...

I'm feeling an instant
connection to you, Chelsea.

Are you feeling this, too?
Ooh! Name your price!

[mumbling]

Yes. I'm Chelsea.
How may I help you?

My life is in a rut.
[nervous laugh]

I am, like... so bored.

[crying]

My work, my life,
all of it!

Okay, well, as, uh,
your new life coach...

[clears throat]

I would say that
you just have to...

you just...
You just gotta do you.

Live your life!

Carpe diem!

One day at a time!

Baby steps to future!

[click]

Really?

Even with my boring job
and boring boss?

Gotta tell him, "boy, bye."
Here.

Oh, my boss is a woman, so...

Woman? So, uh, yeah.
That's easy.

"Girl,
bye. Life is too short." Okay? [clicking]

You're amazing! Oh!

I feel better already.

This is gonna be
worth every penny.

Write all those
pennies down. Yeah.

Thank you, Chelsea.

[laughing]

Thank you, Chelsea!

You're welcome!

Hey, who am I
"you're welcome" -ing?

Uh, a satisfied customer

I just gave great life advice to

because she thought I was you,

and I didn't tell
her I wasn't... Oops.

Rae, that is completely
unethical! You cannot do tha...

- Gas and electricity.
- Okay, no harm, no foul.

♪ ♪

Booker,
here comes Levi.

Just go with it,
okay?

Keep your feedback
positive, brah.

Hey.

Do I look five-five?

Does this look natural? Ah!

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Levi:
Are you sure?

P-positive.

Guys, I've never been
banned from anything before.

But, whatever.

Maren's isn't the only
coffee game in town.

I'll survive.

[whoosh]

[whooshing]

[crowd booing]

Nia, it's not just Maren's.

I had a vision of all
these restaurant people

throwing food at you.

I think that blog makes
everyone in Chicago mad.

What? All because
of Ava's Flavors?

Levi:
Can someone help me up?

♪ ♪

It's confirmed.
Ava's Flavors has reviewed

every single coffee shop
and restaurant on the block.

These flyers are everywhere.

[groans]

Well, I know I'm banned
from all these places,

but still, this is a really
good picture of me.

Oh, I mean I can't
even be mad.

Shh! I'm trying
to watch "Dupe Troop"!

It's a show about
catching people

who use other people's
pictures online,

like Ava's doing to Nia.

Yeah, we've been
watching it all day.

These people almost always
have low self-esteem. It's so sad.

- Aww.
- Mm.

Do not "aww" them!

No one who messes with my
sister should be aww-ed.

- You care about me. Aww!
- Aww!

Do not aww me!

They are fakers and liars.

[gasp] Rae, Rae,
they're onto us.

We confess!
It was us, okay?

It was just one
little fib, you know?

I mean,
no one got hurt.

Raven did it!

They're not even
talking about us, Chels.

Right, kids? You're not
even talking about us.

I mean, we weren't, but
now all I wanna talk about

is your thing.
What did y'all do?

- We ain't gonna talk about that.
- You don't know us.

[talking over each other]

[overlapping chatter]

- We the mamas.
- That's how it is. We the mamas.

Watching y'all...

Alright. I have
a plan to lure Ava out

and show her you do not
mess with my sister.

- Both: Aww...
- Don't!

Mm...

♪ ♪

Okay. I sent Ava
a low-key message

inviting her to review
the city's newest pop-up.

The Roof Top Pop... Up.

She's gonna be here any minute.

Yes, and when she gets here,
she can have

one of these scones that
I made from her blog.

Yeah, I made a few
adjustments though.

They're actually
sugar-free.

[knocking]

They're taste-free.

And when she gets here,
if things go sideways,

we can use these
to defend ourselves.

- [footsteps]
- Wait, wait, you guys hear that?

What did you put in those?!

What are you guys doing up here?

W-we're trying to catch
an impostor. You?

This is where I work out.

According to my new bio,
I lift now.

- [grunting]
- Yes, come on!

Come on! Halfway there!
You got it! Don't give up!

- It's all you! It's all you!
- [grunting]

You're welcome,
Micro Muscles.

Well, after watching "Dupe Troop" and,
uh, Goof Troop...

I've decided that
I can't tear Ava down.

I'm gonna message her, and
I am going to build her up.

Aww, that's my bestie.

Always trying to make
the world a better place.

[giggle]

- Well, I have another plan.
- Great.

Making the world a better
place is her bag.

I'm down for
your thing, too.

♪ ♪

- Raven: Mm... Mm...
- [rhythmic sweeping]

- Hey, Rae!
- [sweeping]

Kinda sounds like the tango!

- [singing]
- Oh!

I hear it! Hey!

[vocalizing]

Look at your dance
moves, Chels!

Yeah! Well, you know,
I was a dance major in college.

We know.

Come on, Rae! Dance with me!

It'll be fun, huh? I'll lead.

Oh. Actually,

no, no, you should lead.

- Yeah.
- It's alright. Let's do it!

- Yeah! Oh, the tango.
- [both vocalizing]

- Chelsea: I knew this would be fun!
- [laughing]

- Chelsea!
- Yes? No. Hi! No, hi!

I'm Chelsea!
The one that's Chelsea

that helped you, remember?

- I told you about her.
- Oh, right. Right, hi.

As Chelsea,
how can I help you?

Well, I took your advice.
I told off my boss,

I quit my job [laugh],

I took out all of
my life savings,

- Wow.
- And I opened a dance studio!

[laughing]
And, and, and, and!

My first class is full.

My life has never
been better!

Oh, I'm so happy for you!

- Congratulations!
- Yes,

how exciting!
Hi, I'm Chelsea...

as well. Yeah.

I rented the space
right downstairs.

When I left here the other day,

I saw a sign...

and it said "for rent."

Ooh!

I love signs!

This morning, I saw
one that said "stop."

So I did, and I just
missed getting hit

by a bus. What!?

[laughs]

I want you two

at my grand opening class.

Okay!

Make sure to wear your
best dance outfits!

[laughing]

♪ ♪

Hey, uh, what's
with the books, bruh?

It's summer.
Book time is, like, over.

Not according to my
Peanut Page profile,

which says, and I quote,

"I love literature.

I read three books a day."

Oh! You got jokes!

I'll add sarcasm
to your profile.

Hey, guys,
I don't get it.

If you smoothed everything
over with Maren,

why am I wearing this hoodie?

It's summer. It's hot.

Okay, full disclosure,
I lied about that.

Yeah, you're still
banned from Maren's,

but it was the only way
we could get you here.

Remember how Maren mentioned

she was hosting
this big bake-off?

Well, we sent Ava
an invitation to review it.

And if our research
is correct,

she'll be here somewhere,
and her cover will be blown.

This is crazy.

I'm just gonna send Ava
another Friendspace message.

[beep]

Busted.

Ava?

No.

Oh.

[beep]

Told you summer
was wild.

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

This isn't what
it looks like!

So, you're not the one
who started that blog

and is posting all those
recipes and mean reviews

using my picture?

Okay, in that sense,
it is what it looks like.

But I just wanted
to share my knowledge

and opinions about food!

Why not use
a picture of you?

The culinary world
is brutal, man!

The only way to get
recognized as a chef

is to scream
and throw plates.

That whole bad boy image.

My approach
is much more refined.

So, I needed a pic
to reflect that.

Okay, but I don't
even know you.

I mean, why use my photo out
of all the people out there?

I just did a search
for "cool person,"

and yours was the first
pic to pop up.

Oh my gosh. Guys,

search engines think
I'm a cool person.

Stay focused, Ni.

Right. Look,
this isn't okay.

I mean, you posing as me
really hurt my reputation.

I haven't had a croissant
in, like, five days.

And I haven't heard her say "croissant" in,
like, five days.

It's just easier for me to be
myself when I'm somebody else.

I'm so sorry, cool person.

I never learned your
real name. I'm Asher.

I'm Nia.

And that's okay.

I mean, I am really
glad that you were able

to express
yourself online.

Wait, how old are you, Asher?

Do your parents even know
that you're doing this?

Oh yeah!
My mom loves my blog.

Hey, Mom!

Well, well, well.

Ava, Nia,

Shady Lady.

Ladles and gentlemen!
Ladles and gentlemen!

Just a little baking
humor for you.

Well, the funky little blogger

with the scathing reviews
of our restaurants,

Ava's Flavors, is here.

- Hi...
- [booing]

And it's time to put your
baking where your blog is.

Oh no. No, no,
thank you, I'm okay...

No, that actually wasn't
a question. Get to mixing.

- Want me to, like...
- You got this.

Bake? But, um...

Okay...

Look, everyone, I think there's
been a huge misunderstanding.

I'm not...

I'm not... here to apologize.

I'm gonna do what's right,
and I'm gonna stand by my blog.

And I'm gonna whip up the most
delicious scones ever.

[booing]

You guys know Nia
can't cook, right?

- Yes!
- Yes!

Just checking.

Okay, so first, I'm...

gonna start with an egg?

I guess.

[cr*ck, splat]

♪ ♪

- [gasps]
- This place looks amazing!

Uh, yeah! Rae,

we helped do
this, you know?

Our business
did all of this.

Gosh, it's really bringing
back all the dance memories.

- Hey...
- Mei: Oh!

- I'm so glad you two could make it!
- Yeah!

- Okay, class is about to begin.
- [cheering]

Let's do this!

- [laughs]
- Let me get ready. And up!

Up!

Tomorrow, tomorrow,
tomorrow...

I'm ready.

- [music playing]
- Okay, everyone.

Time to start.

And arm! Arm!

One, two, three, four!

Down! Down!

Leg! Leg! Leg! Leg!

Scoot! Scoot! Scoot! Scoot!

Arm! Arm! Arm!

Arm! And cantaloupe!

Cantaloupe!
We're just gonna cantaloupe!

In the grocery store!
And eyebrow twitch!

Eyebrow twitch with a kick!
Eyebrow twitch with a kick!

And we're swimming!
We're swimming!

We're swimming! We're swimming!

What is this, like,
some kind of ritual?

- People are leaving.
- We...

- We have to do something.
- I know!

Got it.

- [click, stops music]
- Mei, Mei,

- Mei, Mei! Sweetheart, a word.
- How am I doing?

Bad. Really bad.

Question. Um, what exactly
is your dance training?

I'm mainly self-taught.

In the club! [laughs]

Oh my, Mei, oh my...

My boyfriend says I'm good,

and my mom thinks I'm great.
[laugh]

Oh, oh, of course
she does, honey.

Listen, moms lie.

Don't get me started
on boyfriends.

- Or ex-husbands. The worst.
- Oh! They're the worst, girl. They're the worst.

Oh my gosh! I'm a bad dancer!

I'm a bad dancer!
[crying]

I just thought if
I leapt without the net,

the net would appear!

Okay, well, just breathe
it out now. Just breathe.

- In... out...
- [groaning]

- [groaning]
- Good, okay.

[groaning]

Chels, I have to tell her
that I lied about being you,

- and that I gave her bad advice. I have to.
- No, no, no.

Not yet.
We can fix this, Rae.

Hey, Mei! Mei,
just keep breathing.

Good, good.
Everything's gonna be okay.

Yes! Yes, it is
gonna be okay

- because my bestie was a dance major
in college. - What? No!

- I'm not the net. I'm not... I'm not net-certified!
- Yeah, everybody!

Everybody, come on back!
Come on back!

That was just
the ritual warm-up!

Get ready for the real dance,

where you pay in sweat!

Yes! [laughs]

That was the plan
all along! [laughs]

Everyone,
the Chelseas!

Rae, Rae, a word, a word.

I cannot do this.

Chels, were you or were
you not the lead in "Bats"...

- the musical?
- Yeah, but, Rae,

I mean, come on,
that was so long ag...

A five, six, seven, eight!

♪ ♪

[crowd booing]

Look at her up there.

Can't believe she's willing
to embarrass herself for me.

That's just the type
of person Nia is.

She'd embarrass
herself for anyone.

And she often does.

She's very embarrassing.

But, she's
also my sister,

and you need
to fix this now.

[booing]

[booing continues]

Wait, wait, wait, are they
throwing stuff at my sister?

No, no, no! It's Asher.

[booing]

Little dude is giving
Nia the ingredients

she needs for the dish.

That was my vision.

She needs more help.

Man, she really is a bad cook.

Oof, you said it,
Bento Box.

- You know, I totally get why you like
those nicknames! - Right?

Everyone, I would like to
introduce you to my, um,

my assistant chef, Asher.

Actually,

I'm the real Ava's Flavors.

[crowd gasping]

And I'm ready to show you
I'm more than just a blog.

♪ ♪

Seven, eight,
hit, hit, hit!

Right, left,
and turn! Turn! Turn!

Turn, and pop! Pop!
And sizzle! Down!

Yes!

[cheering, applause]

Okay, everyone!
Class is over!

Thank you so much!

[all screaming]

We did it, Chelseas!

Chelseas, the Chelseas.

Listen, I need to
tell you the truth.

Um, I'm not Chelsea.

Actually, I'm...
I'm not even a life coach.

What? Who are you!?

I'm Raven Baxter.
I'm a fashion designer.

You may have seen
my designs on Little Z

or Little Mix. I'm really
big with the Littles.

No time for little jokes?
Got it. Listen here.

This is Chelsea Grayson.

She is the life coach,
and you mistook me for her,

and I gave you bad advice.
I wanna apologize.

Actually,

she gave you
great advice.

You were unhappy, right?

But, you still have
to follow your dreams.

You just might have to work
a little harder to, you know,

make this one happen.

- You're right.
- [laughs] Yeah. Listen,

why don't you come into
my office next week,

- and...
- We'll dance?

We'll make a plan.

That sounds nice.
[laughs]

And have you ever
thought about a makeover?

- Oh, my mom says I'm... - We'll put
you down for Thursday. Bring your mama.

♪ ♪

- So, I guess I owe you an apology, Nia.
- Tess: Oh, yeah.

That's right.
Ms. Maren, my bestie

would never say anything
bad about this place.

Yeah,
I really wouldn't.

I mean, the crisp flavor
of the iced matcha,

and the subtle aroma
of fresh muffins,

and how the apple fritters are,
like, crunchy on the outside,

but they're soft on the inside
with a hint of cinnamon? I...

I really miss them.

Well, you don't have to
miss them for much longer.

You are unbanned.

Thank you so much.

You're welcome.

♪ ♪

[humming]

- Hey, now, I'm whippin'. I'm whippin'.
- Uh-huh. Uh-huh.

She Nae Nae! She Nae Nae!

I whip it! I whip it!
[laughing]

- [laughter trails off] - They're not
even watching us. They don't even care.

You know what?
This is ridiculous!

What did I tell you guys
about social media?

Put your phones down.

Put the phones down!

- So, what do we do now?
- We talk!

- We talk to each other.
- Yes, like this.

- Hello. How are you?
- I'm well. I'm whipping cream.

- What are you doing?
- Absolutely nothing.

Wait, you want us to have,
like, a conversation?

But, why though?

Okay, alright, um.
So, what'd you guys do today?

Oh my gosh. You would not
believe what your mom did.

First, she lied. Then, she...

Story time is over! Pick
up your phones! Social time!

♪ ♪