Come on, guys. Ruby's
gonna be late for school.
Would you grab
your backpacks, please?
Jim, i will be back for kyle
in minutes.
Please don't forget to pick up
gracie at her play date
At jenny campbell's
after work.
Uh-Huh.
Oh, and don't forget
her shoes this time.
Uh-Huh.
Oh, and you know what?
This is jenny's.
Would you please
give it back to her?
Uh-Huh.
And i'll be at my boyfriend's
tonight if you need me.
Uh-Huh.
You are so not listening
to me.
Yeah, you'll be
at your boyfriend's.
Just make sure
you take the kids.
Oopsie.
Jim, would you please
do something about that?
You'll be back
in minutes.
Jim?
[ Groans ]
Hey, buddy.
How are you?
Okay, pal, you got minutes.
Eat up.
Hah!
Oh, baby.
Here, kitty, kitty.
Here, mr. Feeney.
Hey, honey.
Good morning, girls.
Morning, daddy.
Morning, daddy.
Good morning, buddy.
Soft spot getting
smaller. All right.
Mr. Feeney!
Hey, honey, honey,
You know where
my game day shirt is?
Oh, yeah,
i washed it.
You washed
my game day shirt?
Yeah.
You don't wash
game day shirt.
That's bad luck.
Oh, it's a good thing you don't
have game day underwear.
Honey, you don't wear
underwear on game day.
Damn. Springtime fresh.
What am i supposed
to do?
Here, honey.
Hey, good idea.
Oh, yeah,
that's better.
♪ are you ready
for some football? ♪
I am ready
for some football!
Yeah! You are it!
♪ are you ready
for some football? ♪
I thought we were all gonna
paint our faces.
Uh, i guess we
forgot to tell you.
Don't we look
like the idiots.
Uncle andy?
Yeah,
sweetie?
Are you a clown?
No, i am
an aia-Certified
architect
And a stanford
graduate.
And on the weekends,
a clown.
Here, honey,
snacks for the tailgate.
Oh, baby,
you're the best.
You just bought yourself
another six months
Of being my wife.
Oh, yay.
Mom,
gracie's chewing
with her mouth open.
Aah!
Make gracie stop!
Mom!
Honey?
Yes?
Are you gonna
be all right?
I mean, if you don't
want me to go, i won't.
No, honey, i want you to go
and have a good time.
Oh, i love
playing this game.
All: * bear down,
chicago bears *
Radio: it is a gorgeous day
here on the lakefront.
We're about an hour away
from the opening kickoff.
Whoo!
Yes!
And the bears
have yet to announce
Their starting quarterback.
Mcnown.
Matthews.
I have to pee.
Well, we're not
gonna stop now.
You can go
to the bathroom
in the stadium.
You know i can't pee
in a trough.
All those men,
shoulder-To-Shoulder --
Those stolen glances.
Well, take your mind
off it.
Think about
something else,
Like
a babbling brook
Or a waterfall.
Yeah, or men peeing.
[ Laughs ]
[ Cellular phone rings ]
Yeah?
Cheryl.
Okay, okay, honey,
calm down, calm down.
What's wrong?
Her cat died.
Mr. Feeney?
Oh, honey,
i'm really sorry.
Listen,
we'll be there
As soon as the game
is over.
I mean halftime.
We're on our way.
Bye.
Okay, don't worry.
This shouldn't
take long.
We should still make
the game by kickoff.
Aw, poor cheryl.
This is so sad.
Yeah.
I didn't even know
we still had a cat.
Mr. Feeney
is gonna love that.
Sorry for your loss.
Hi, honey.
Oh.
Hi, girls.
Oh, you're looking
at pictures of
mr. Feeney, huh?
I am so sorry
we ruined your day.
Where is he?
In the upstairs bathroom.
Aah!
He died in his litter box.
Aw.
Like elvis.
I got this box and this towel
to wrap him in,
But then
i just couldn't do it.
Oh, sweetie,
i'll take care of it.
Oh, thank you.
Hey, is this
one of the towels
I got you
for your anniversary?
I'll just go get him.
I had to
special order them.
Honey, i-I thought
it would be nice for the girls
If we took a few minutes
to say goodbye to mr. Feeney,
So if you could
say something...
sure.
Okay, everybody,
Cheryl would like us
to say a few words,
So i'll start.
We are assembled here
today to pay tribute
To this cat --
Wrapped in egyptian cotton.
We're here to say
goodbye.
Mr. Feeney was more
than just a cat
to cheryl.
He was like a dog
to her.
And i know if mr. Feeney
were here right now,
He would say,
"Bury me and move on
with your day."
"Enjoy life.
"Eat a pizza.
"I mean, it's not my thing,
but you may like it.
"Or do whatever
you were planning to do
"On this beautiful
sunday afternoon.
I mean, come on,
already. I'm dead."
Okay, ruby, your turn.
Once mr. Feeney
slept in my bed
And woke me up
by biting my nose.
Isn't that sweet?
Okay, next.
And then gracie and i
played kitchen
And made pancakes
and waffles,
But not real ones.
It was pretend.
That's so beautiful,
honey. Okay, next.
And then -- And then --
There was this one time
When we went
to st. Louis --
Uh-Huh.
♪ the cupcake man,
the cupcake man ♪
♪ who was born one day
in a muffin pan ♪
Both: * he ran away
from the baker's shop *
♪ and then he married
a lollipop ♪
Okay, okay, okay.
Okay,
that was beautiful.
Thank you, ruby.
Andy.
Gracie, sweetie,
Do you have something
you want to say?
I loved him.
See, ruby? Three words.
Girls, that was perfect.
Why don't we go
to the park now?
Go up and grab your sweaters
And we'll get
your little brother.
Jim?
Would you please bury
mr. Feeney in the backyard?
Sure, honey, sure.
Okay, let's go.
Honey.
You mean now?
I don't want the girls
to see. Okay?
Yeah.
Well, why don't you guys
go ahead to the game?
And i'll just get there
when i can.
You sure there's
nothing we can do?
Well, you can help me dig.
It's just
an expression.
Radio: that last play,
gaining about a yard.
So, batch and the lions
Faced with a third and goal.
Call at
the eight-Yard line.
We're tied at ,
but don't go anywhere.
Here's the snap.
Batch roaming
to his right.
Looking in the end zone,
he's under pressure.
He is hit.
The ball's loose!
The ball is loose!
And bears have it!
The bears got it!
Yes! Yes!
Radio: yes, sir,
that's fuster
Who came up with
the loose ball...
great!
And the bears' defense
comes through once again,
And this crowd
at soldier field
Is just going
bananas, folks.
Bears will have it
first and
Pointing in
the other direction.
[Whistle]
There's a break
in the action on the field.
Right here, mr. Feeney.
Hey,
where have you been?
You missed
the entire
first quarter.
Well, i went to the restroom
and stood there at that trough,
But no dice.
So i ran across the street
And rented a room
at the radisson.
Best $ . i ever spent.
Excuse me, excuse me.
Hey, we didn't expect
to see you so soon.
I took a shortcut.
[ Cheering ]
Who wants a popsicle?
I do.
Me too! Me too!
Aah!
[ Cheering ]
We won! We won!
Hi, daddy.
Hi, daddy.
Hey, baby.
How are you, sugar?
You know, detroit almost
had us there for a minute.
Then my shirt kicked in.
Did you bring us something?
Did you bring us something?
Honey, i always
bring you something.
Here.
Whoa!
Crinkly!
And for you, baby...
paper!
Thank you, daddy!
You're welcome, honey.
Oh, cheryl,
you missed a great game.
I mean, first i bought
a small popcorn,
They gave me a large.
What's for dinner?
I thought
we'd have steaks.
Oh, steaks. Great.
Yeah, i'm just gonna
run out to the garage,
Grab them
out of the freezer.
Uh, honey, let me get them
for you. I'll get them.
No, no, no, no.
Honey, come on.
You've had a hard day.
Going to the game,
eating peanuts,
Burying my cat.
You have done
a lot of stuff.
Let me get them.
Oh, you know what,
honey?
You know, i already
had steak at the game.
They sell steak
at soldier field now?
Yeah, it's called,
uh, steak on a stick.
Apparently,
we're a test city.
You know,
i had to fill out
A card and everything,
you know.
I don't know if it's
gonna work in football.
You know, the tenderness
is not quite the same
on a stick.
Is there something
you need to tell me?
Uh...
i love you?
You know, i feel like
that guy in the movie,
He's got to cut
the red wire
or the green wire
So the b*mb
doesn't go off.
Well, why don't you
just cut the crap wire?
Okay, i stuck the cat
in the freezer.
But, you know,
i mean, the ground
Was way harder
than i thought
it was, honey.
I thought i could come
home after the game
And bury mr. Feeney.
I wanted
to do the job right.
No, you wanted to go
to your stupid football game.
Honey, let's not
say something
We're gonna
regret later.
You mean like "i do"?
All right, now this is
how fights get started.
So i think the thing
that we should do
Is table this discussion
Till after
we've had our steaks.
I love that you actually think
i'm making you dinner.
Come on, honey.
It's just a cat.
Damn.
Red wire.
Poor mr. Feeney.
He looks like
he's stalking
those frozen peas.
Hey, ed.
Huh?
Touch it.
I'm not touching it,
man. You touch it.
Aw, come on. Touch it.
I'm not gonna
touch that cat.
You touch it.
I'll give you a buck
if you touch it.
What do i gotta do
to it for a $ ?
That's wrong.
Hey, guys.
Jim, i thought
you buried him.
Well, i didn't.
Your sister's all
pissed off at me, too.
If i were a woman
and my husband froze my cat,
It'd be a long time
before i gave him any sugar.
Andy, let's not play
"if i were a woman."
I didn't even know
you had a cat.
Thank you.
Women and cats, huh?
Yeah, right.
I don't get it.
I mean, all they do
is eat, sleep,
And stare at you
while you're having sex.
Women or cats?
We're in a fight now.
She's all upset.
You know, there are no cats
mentioned in the bible.
Thank you, tony.
Who knows what goes on
in the mind of a woman?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Andy?
[ All laugh ]
all right.
All right,
let's rehearse.
, , .
Okay, the girls are
playing in their room
And i put kyle down.
How'd you get him
to go to sleep so fast?
Same way i do
with all guys.
I told him
about my day.
I just -- I can't believe
jim did this.
You know, cheryl, i know
this great guy for you.
He lives in my complex,
he also has kids,
And i'm totally done
dating him.
The guy with
the porsche?
I like him.
Guys.
Sorry.
Mr. Feeney.
Oh, i miss him, too.
Those cute little whiskers
And those little paws.
Nothing will
ever replace him.
Oh, a doggie!
A doggie!
Girls, come on down.
I got a big surprise
for you.
Cheryl?
Mm-Hmm.
After our talk,
I said to myself,
"She lost her cat.
"She loved that cat.
She's sad
about that cat."
So i got you a dog.
A dog?
Yeah, i figured
i'd get something
That all of us
could love.
Isn't it great?
I named him
gary sinise.
Jim, you're the one
who's always wanted a dog.
Gary sinise
is a great actor.
He could play a cat.
[ Giggles ]
he likes me.
He's licking me.
You know,
he licks himself, too.
Problem...
problem solved.
[ Groans ]
What are you doing?
I'm gonna bury my cat.
Give me that.
Let me do it.
Honey, you're not
gonna be able to --
How did you do that?
Cheryl...
come on.
I got you a dog.
Getting a dog
is a quick fix,
Like putting a cat
in a freezer.
You know, that's like
getting skis for someone
Who just broke their leg.
Here we go
with the skis again.
This is not about skis.
I know.
What's it about,
then? Tell me,
will ya?
It's about
you not being there for me.
Oh, come on.
Dana and andy --
They went to the game,
too.
Why aren't you mad
at them?
I'm not married
to andy and dana.
I needed
a little bit of compassion
From the man i love.
Cheryl, look,
if you want me
To feel the same way
you do about the cat,
Well, i don't.
It's a shame
that your cat died,
But, hey, let's look
at the silver lining --
I haven't sneezed
all day.
Cheryl...
you gotta help me
here.
I-I don't know
what you want.
I'm not
a mind reader.
Jim, you don't have
to be a mind reader
To ask me how i'm feeling.
You know...
i had that cat for years.
It was the last thing i had left
from before i met you,
From before i was
somebody's wife and --
And somebody's mother.
You know, a whole part
of my life died today.
Come on, honey,
let me help you.
Jim.
Would you please
just leave me alone
With my dead frozen cat?
Mommy, the doggie
throwed up!
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have to go clean up
after gary sinise.
Good night,
little monkeys.
Good night.
Good night,
aunt dana.
Good night,
aunt dana.
Okay, you guys.
You ready for "bradford
and the magic dinosaur"?
No, tell us
a real story.
About mr. Feeney.
Okay.
I remember
when mr. Feeney was born.
He was tiny --
Tiny and pink.
My boyfriend and i
took him home,
And he spent
the whole night with us.
You and daddy?
No, uh...
this was a different boy
who was a friend.
You had a boy sleep over?
What was his name?
Uh, david...
feeney.
[ Giggling ]
That boy had
the same name as our cat.
Yes, he did. He d--
Oh, would you look
how late it is?
Good night, sweetie.
Mommy?
Yes?
Is mr. Feeney god's cat now?
Yeah, honey, he is.
Now good night.
Mommy?
Yes?
How do they make cereal?
You guys just don't want
to go to sleep, do you?
[ Chuckles ]
Good night.
[ Harmonica playing
"amazing grace" ]
♪ amazing grace ♪
♪ how sweet the sound ♪
♪ that saved
a wretch like me ♪
♪ i once was lost ♪
♪ but now i'm found ♪
♪ was blind,
but now i see ♪
You like him,
don't you?
He's okay.
Okay, gary, beat it.
Let's go.
Come on, come on,
my time.
[ Laughs ]
Aw.
It's nice to know
that after nine years,
You can still
surprise me.
Where did the name mr. Feeney
come from, anyway?
Let it go, jim.
The cat's dead.