07x08 - Politics Begin at Home

[bunniefuu]

Well, if you ask me,

it's a good thing Ralph
had to move out of town

and resign as
city councilman.

He was nothing but
a maybe man.

No action.

Well, I just hope we get
somebody good to take his place.

You seem to know so much
about it, Floyd.

Why don't you run?

Goober, I served four years
on the city council.

Four of the stormiest years
in Mayberry's political history.

I didn't know they
were stormy, Floyd.

Well, you were too young.

It was just a constant battle
against corruption.

Here?

Yes, right here.

In Mayberry.

Eh, corruption all over
the place.

Remember the famous
drinking fountain scandal?

Somebody made a mistake
and ran a hot water line in.

Ah... uh... mmm...

Tried to cover up.

Well, Mayberry ain't
that way today.

My boy, this is your heritage.

Hey...

Hey, you know, you know

you know who'd make
a good council member?

A real good one?

Who?
Who?

Howard sprague.

Huh
Howard sprague.
Yeah.

Might be just the man, Andy.

He's been county
clerk for years.

That's good
experience.

He's always talking
about improvements

he'd like to see made.

Intelligent.

Yeah.
Yeah.

Conscientious.

Upstanding.
Yeah.

And he loves dogs.

What's that got to
do with anything?

Let's go ask him.

I bet nobody'd even
run against him.

Okay.

And I believe the highlight
of last week's meeting

was the very interesting review
tillie Kincaid gave of the book

roses are the backbone
of your garden

by Mabel j. Mosley.

I'm sure it inspired us all

to give even more loving care
to our roses.

And tillie's summation
of Mrs. Mosley's book

can be put in a nutshell:

Spare the insecticides but
do not spare the fertilizer.

That, I believe, concludes the
minutes of our last meeting.

Oh, well done.

Thank you, bee.

And now, any new business?

Bee?

Well, I believe,
as loyal members
of the garden club

that we should
do something

about beautifying
elm street.

You know, in a lovely
city like Mayberry

it doesn't seem right
to have a blighted area.

If the wallravens would
paint their house

it would certainly help.

It would.

I move we form
a committee

and whoever's elected
to city council

we should take
our views to him.

An excellent idea, Ella.

I mean, not that we
want to be a pressure
group or anything

but if we throw
our weight behind
the right man--

girls!

Girls, I have an idea.

In fact,
it's an inspirational idea.

Now, instead of our forming
a committee about this

why not one of us
run for city council?

Clara, that is
an inspirational idea.

I suggest that we choose someone
to run right here, right now.

And it has to be someone
who's well-known

and who has the qualities
of leadership.

I nominate bee Taylor.

I second it.

Bee would be perfect.

Oh, no, girls.
Please, no.

I don't know anything
about politics.

What is there to know?

You have good
common sense

and the courage
of your convictions.

And you're certainly
popular, bee.

There's no doubt
about that.

Well, i'm...
I'm very honored.

Everyone for bee...

Unanimous.

Well, ladies...

I accept the nomination.

And if elected, I promise
to work diligently

for the betterment
of Mayberry.

Golly, fellas, I don't know.

I'm just overwhelmed.

Think about it,
Howard, just
think about it.

You'd be a real
good 'un.

You've got the experience.

County clerk for two years.

It just comes down to we think
you're the best man for the job.

Well, it certainly is a thrill

to have friends who think
so highly of me, but...

City councilman.

Gosh.

The machine will back you
a hundred percent.

I'll tell you one thing,
we're all behind you.

Aunt bee will talk it up for you
at all her women's clubs.

What do you say?

Gentlemen,
I accept the nomination.

Oh!
Attaboy, Howard.

Congratulations.

We who have served
salute you.

Aunt bee!

She's not
home yet, paw.

Ah.

Oh, hi, ope.

Hi, paw.

How was school?

Oh... fine.

Milk?
Yeah.

Any marks?

Just history.

How'd you do?

Well...

This test doesn't really
mean much.

We're having two more
before the end of the term.

Huh.

How'd you do?

And miss crump didn't tell us

she was gonna give us the stuff
from the last chapter.

Half the class didn't know it,
either.

How'd you do?

Well...

I got a high "d."

A high "d"!

Ope, you're just going
to have to buckle down...

I've got
some exciting news.

What, aunt bee?

You're both going to be
very proud of me.

What did you do?

I'm going to run
for city council.

Gosh, aunt bee,
that's just great!

Isn't that great, paw?

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, boy.

You don't sound
very thrilled.

Oh, I'm thrilled.

I'm... I'm thrilled.

It's... it's just that, uh...

Just that what?

Well, uh, I think it's...

I think it's great.

Uh, but...

But what?

Well, uh...

Oh, I think...

I think it's just
wonderful news.

It's just that... uh...

Don't you think that some
other people might be...

Uh...

Better qualified?

Better qualified?

Oh... well, I certainly didn't
think it of you, Andy Taylor.

So you're one of these men

who think that women's place
is in the home.

Oh, no. Now, wait,
I didn't say that.

Oh, you, of all people.

No, now, wait a minute,
aunt bee, now...

Will you go study?

Opie, stay just
where you are.

It might be enlightening
to hear

some of your father's
old-fashioned ideas.

Oh, I don't have
old-fashioned ideas.

I think women
in politics...

Just every bit
as good as men.

Just every bit as good.

All I'm saying is
that in this case

don't you think that
somebody else might be

just a little
better qualified?

Some man,
I suppose.

Now...

You stay
here. Hmm?

Now, aunt bee,
will you...
Will you...?

Aunt bee...

Aunt bee,
will you please

just get it
through your head...

Come in.

Hi.

Aunt bee:
Hi.

I heard you were
running for city
council, aunt bee.

Congratulations.

Thank you.

I'm glad
someone is pleased.

Well, in view of the
circumstances, Andy

I guess I sorta
kinda oughta let
you off the hook.

Hook

oh.

I presumed
that you had...

No, I haven't.

Aunt bee, Howard's running
for city council, too.

In fact, I'm one of the ones
that talked him into it

because I honestly believe,
with his experience

he's the best man
for the job.

Well...

I'm sorry, aunt bee

but I'm going to have
to go along with this.

I'll be supporting Howard.

Well.

Well!

Gee, Andy, I sure
appreciate the
stand you're taking

but it seems to place
you in a rather
ticklish situation.

Yeah...

You might say that.

Hello.

Oh, hello, Clara.

Yes, I'm working on it now.

Mm-hmm. Getting ideas
and making notes.

Well, as my campaign manager

I think you and a few
of the other girls and myself

should caucus this afternoon.

Caucus.

C-a-u-c-u-s.

Yes, it's a sort
of get-together.

All right, well,
we'll check later, Clara.

Bye-bye.

Well, good morning.

Good morning.

Mm.

It's over there.

Oh. Oh.

Fine.

Uh... I wonder
if I...

Well, I do have
everything

where I can just put
my hands on it.

Oh. Well, that's...
That's fine.

That's fine.

It's a nice morning.

Yes.

Aunt bee, I hope you understand
my position in this election.

Andy, I understand
your position perfectly

and any ill feeling
I may have indicated

is completely gone.

Oh. Well, good.

You had me scared there
for a minute.

Opie:
Morning.

Oh, morning, ope.

Well, I'll get
your breakfast for you, dear.

Sit down, Opie.

Sit down.

Go ahead.

Plenty of room.

I finished that poster
for you, aunt bee.

Oh, thank you, Opie.

It's so refreshing

when one finds loyalty
in the family.

I drew up a poster
for aunt bee.

"Miss bee Taylor
for progressive government."

Good, ope. Good.

Very good. Very good.

Finish your breakfast, Opie.

I have to get dressed.

Now, is there
anything else you want?

Oh, no, thank you.

I could use an egg.

They're in the refrigerator.

I just don't know
what course of action to take.

I've thought and thought
and thought.

Oh, hi, Andy.

Fellas.

Gee, Andy, we've just
been talking.

You know, this whole thing
is quite a dilemma.

I wouldn't say that.

It might be a little
uncomfortable for some of us,

but I think the issue
is very clear.

Clear as crystal!

Explain it to goober now.

Well, aunt bee is
a wonderful woman.

A wonderful woman,
she'll get my vote.

I'm not finished, Floyd.

Oh.

She's a wonderful woman,
but we all agree

that Howard is the best man
for the job.

Now, I meant it,
and I still mean it,

I think he is by far
the best qualified.

That's just what
I was gonna say.

The machine --
we'll back you %, boy.

Floyd!

Now, Howard, I think
you should still run,

and do everything you can
to win,

because it's
very important

that we have the best man
in there.

Well, what do you say?

Andy, my hat's
in the ring to stay.

Now, what we got to do

is get the thing started
and hit 'em hard.

I mean, do everything we can --
shake hands,

go see people,
just see everybody.

Girls, girls!

Bee, bee, wonderful news!

Oh?

I've just arranged two more
speaking engagements for you.

The boosters club luncheon
tomorrow

and the literary guild
Wednesday night!

Oh, good, they're very
influential organizations!

Yes, and I've talked
with Lillian hartzel

and she says she'll be
more than happy

to bring her saxophone
and perform if you like.

Oh, it's a wonderful idea!

You know her version of
"the flight of the Bumblebee"

certainly livens up
an audience.

And we've got to use
every tool at our command!

Every tool.

We've got to have
more slogans.

That's what the
people want to hear.

Yeah. Hey, let's think
of something.

It has to be catchy.

Like, uh, "win with wilke."

"A landslide for Landon."

Oh. "Tippecanoe and Tyler, too."

What's that mean?

Mean? It means what it says.

Man had a canoe,
and it kept tipping over and...

Probably had something to do
with "don't rock the boat."

Oh.

Oh, and another thing, too.

We got to get that Indian vote.

Indian?

Yeah.

Well, there's
just one.

Well, every vote counts.

Let me think now.

What's an issue
that would appeal to Indians?

Um...

"Preserve the buffalo."

Ah...

Good morning,
Mr. Councilman.

Oh, let's not count
our chickens

before they're hatched.

Good. Good.

Use that in the speech.

A well-turned phrase
can get votes.

You, uh,
haven't seen Andy.

He's not in his office.

He ought to be
along any minute.

Woman:
Oh, they're
of them.

Morning, ladies.

Why, hi, Andy.

Working
on a platform
for the campaign.

I don't think

any platform's going
to win this election.

Everybody's got
their emotions involved.

What do you mean, Andy?

Well, I just passed by
a couple of garden club ladies

and they won't have
a thing to do with me

and that means you, too.

Getting to be
a battle of the sexes.

Hey, we better
line up some issues

that'll appeal
to the women voters.

Yeah, make a note
of that, goober.

And the Indian, too.

Right.

Howard, let me...
Let me ask you something.

What would you say
to an open debate

between you and aunt bee?

You know, let the people get
to know about both candidates...

What they feel
and what they hope to do.

Gee, that sounds like
a wonderful idea, Andy.

Good. Now, let's just see
if we can set that up.

I'll talk to aunt bee.

We'll see you, fellas.

Floyd:
Bye, Andy.

Now, let's see here.

Oh. Oh, yes. Here it is.

Uh, I do think
we ought to discuss

the new bridge
over Parker creek.

This year's council
certainly has
to face it.

I'm going all out on it
in my speech tonight.

Right.
Good.

Bee, wear
your blue suit.

It gives
a feeling of stability.

I think you're right.
Now --

well, uh, ladies...

We ar having
a meeting here.

Well, fine, fine.

I'd just like
to check something.

'Course, it is your house.

If you'd prefer
we go somewhere else.

No, no, no.

I'd just like
to get this thing down

to a sensible basis.

I was talking
with some of the fellas.

And I believe if we could get
the issues in this campaign

before the public

then they might
get a better idea

of who they'd
like to have for
their councilman

or, in your
case, woman.

Now, well...

A debate
is what I'm talking about

in the town hall.

It's-it's fine with Howard.

And, uh, well,
what about you, aunt bee?

Debate?

Yes.

May I ask my
campaign manager?

Well, certainly.

Excuse me.

Aunt bee:
Mm-mmm.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Mm.

We have decided.

We would welcome
such a debate

and the sooner
the better.

Fine. I'll, uh,
I'll set it up.

Ladies...
Ladies and gentlemen,

could I have
your attention?

If you'll just take seats.

Uh...

I'm sure everybody knows
both our candidates

for the city council.

Miss bee Taylor...

And Howard sprague.

Now, both the candidates
have agreed

that there'll be
no formal rules

or set questions
for the, uh, debate tonight.

So, uh, anybody
who has any questions

about any of the issues

just feel free to ask them

and the candidates
will give you their opinions.

Uh... well, uh... all set.

So just, uh...

Just fire away.

I'd like to hear
a discussion

on the subject of, uh,
putting up a new bridge

over Parker creek
on the old ranch road.

Ladies first.

The fact that I'm a lady
has nothing to do with it.

The issue is not whether
a man or woman is running

but who's best
qualified for the job.

Oh, I couldn't agree more.

I only meant...

Of course.

Now, as to
the new bridge

being built
over Parker creek

at the old ranch road

I say if it is the
will of the people

that a bridge be built

then a bridge
shall be built.

Well, uh... I think this
would just be a waste

of the taxpayers' money.

Waste of the taxpayers' money?

Let me read some figures
I have here

on the cost of such a project.

Now, if the bridge were built

just one block away
on Baker Street...

Baker Street

well, it would result
in a savings of $ ,

including the cost of $
to repair the old bridge

which could still be used
for pedestrian traffic.

Now, at % interest,
this could be amortized

over the next ten years

at a monthly expenditure
of $ . .

Now, % of this
would be deductible

in light of the new
government ruling

on civic improvements.

Now, this would leave
a net total cost to the city

of under $ .

Where did he get
all that information?

These figures, of course,
are only an approximation

based upon the probable
current interest rates

at the time
the project is instituted.

I'm sorry I can't be
more exact at this time.

Next question, please.

Uh, how about
the new sewers
for main street?

I'm glad you asked
that question, goober.

The sewers on main street

is a subject
very close to all of us.

And I say
if the people want new sewers

they shall have them.

The will of the people--

that shall be my beacon
to shine forever

in the darkness
of political ignorance.

Well, as county clerk,
the sewer situation

is an area
that is not unfamiliar to me.

Frankly, I don't think
new sewers is the answer.

I have some figures here

on the cost of repairing
our old ones.

Now, if we were to concentrate
on the -foot run

between first
and third streets

we could completely
repair this line

assuming that
the plumbing wage cost

remains at a constant...

And I would say definitely no.

A new road connecting
with the state highway

would just be a waste
of taxpayers' money...

The boy, he's got
a lot of savvy.

Reminds me of myself
when I was .

Then we could always
reconsider the measure.

Uh, only time can tell.

Uh, are there
any more questions?

Aunt bee:
Yes. I have one.

I've been sitting here

listening to my
worthy opponent

with all of his
facts and figures

about the problems
of our town.

And I've been listening
not as a candidate

but as one
of the people
who lives here.

And my question is

why should anyone
vote for me

when you have
a man like Howard
sprague running?

I can't think of anybody else
I'd want on the council

looking after
my interests and
everybody else's.

And I wholeheartedly
urge you

to cast your vote
for Howard sprague.

Well, uh...

Gee, aunt bee,
i, uh...

I don't know
what to say.

Well, we'll talk about it
tomorrow morning

when you're having
your eggs and cereal

and sausages
and pancakes and...

If there's anything
else you'd like

just let me know.

Now, are you sure that's
enough for you, Andy?

Plenty, plenty, plenty.

I didn't tell you
about my talk with Howard

last night
after the debate.

No.

He's asked me
to head a committee

for the beautification
of elm street.

Hey, that's something!

You mean you're
gonna be in charge

of the whole thing,
aunt bee?

That's right, Opie.

Well, that's
quite an assignment.

I've been thinking about it

ever since he mentioned it
to me.

And you know what I'm planning?

Not the faintest idea.

I'm going to remove all of
the elm trees on elm street,

and I'm going to
plant magnolias.

We'll probably call it
"magnolia street."

That's a nicer name, anyway,
and when those trees

are in bloom, that whole street
will be completely shaded.

It'll probably be the prettiest
street in Mayberry.

Ooh, politics are exciting!

Do you know what
my other plan is?

When they finish the bridge
at Baker Street,

we're going to build
a dam,

and then we're going to
put in a water wheel.

It'll be just beautiful.