05x15 - Otis Sues the County

[bunniefuu]

Starring Andy Griffith...

With Ronny Howard...

Also starring Don knotts.

Morning, ange.

Shh. Morning.

What's the matter?

Nothing. Otis is trying to get
a little extra sleep.

Oh, well, now I believe I've
heard just about everything.

A prisoner in custody.

What are we running here,
the Mayberry motor lodge?

Barney, you're making
a big thing out of nothing.

Why don't we put a "do not
disturb" sign on the cell?

Shut up out there.
Will you hold it down?

I'm talking to the sheriff!

Next thing you know,

he'll be wanting maid service.

Hey, Barney!

I'm talking to the sheriff!

Listen, we ought to put
our foot down.

Hey! What do you think
you're doing?

That's what they do
in the big house to the screws!

I'm no screw!
You stop it!

You gonna make me?
Yeah!

Yeah?
Yeah!

Hold it, hold it, hold it!

Now, stop fighting, both of you.

He started it!
I did not!

Look, Otis,
your sentence was up at : .

Why don't you just go on home?

You gonna make me?
Yeah!

Yeah?
Yeah!

Yeah?
Yeah!

All right, I said stop fighting,
both of you.

I got to go on patrol.

Otis, why don't you just
get it through your head

that you are nothing
but a prisoner?

You want a cup of coffee?

If you don't mind.

Okay.

Hi, Otis.

Hi, Floyd.

That you, Floyd?

Yeah. Good morning.

It's me, Barney.

You want some coffee?

No, thank you.
I had my cup.

What are you doing here
so early, Floyd?

I was on my way to the shop.

Oh-ho, and I saw you
come in last night,

and, oh, boy,

you must have been feeling
plenty good, huh?

Yeah, I guess.

Yeah, you want

to come in for a shave
and a witch

yeah, I'll be in.

Mm-hmm. All right.

Just wait a second here.

Oh, there's one haircut
ahead of you, Otis.

One of those boys
from back in the hills.

Oh?

Yeah, I never know
how long that's gonna take.

I just have to keep cutting
till I see scalp.

How's : ?

Fine.

What in the world happened?

Nothing. I just fell down.

Well, you're rubbing your knee.

Oh, yeah, stings a little bit.

Think maybe I sprained it.

Well, what'd you do,
trip or something?

No. Just went down.

You better fill
out a form, Otis.

A form?

An "accidental injury"

"occurring on county
property" form.

Got to be filled out
in triplicate.

What for, Barn?

I've always had
trouble with this knee.

Boy, I'd sure hate

to have to fill out a form
every time I fell down.

Wouldn't leave me
much time for drinking.

He's got a point there.

'Cause I, I saw him come in
last night.

Ohh! Oh-oh-oh-oh!

I'm telling you, Barney,

I have always had trouble
with this knee.

It's an old football injury.

Got it playing football
with my wife.

Playing football with his wife.

All right, stop kidding around.

You're a witness.
I was?

Yeah. Sign
right there.

All right.

Playing football with his wife.

Oh, you're a caution, Otis.

Fill that out.

Oh. Do I have to
fill all these out?

Well, all except
the last few lines.

That's for the notary.

Where we going to get a notary?

Over at the bank.
Mary pleasant's a notary.

Now, get on over there.

Plain nuisance.

Much more of this kind
of treatment, Barney,

and I'm warning you, I'm
going to do my drinking

outside of your jurisdiction.

Playing football with his wife!

Did you hear that, Barney?

Mr. Schwamp.

Andy.

Barn.

Ange, did you see that copy

of the accident report
I left on your desk?

Yeah. I don't see any point
in filing it, though.

It wasn't anything serious.

Oh, boy!

First, I got to argue
with the prisoner.

Now you're bucking me.

If you want to file it,
you file it.

There's a right way and a wrong
way of doing these things.

If you want to file it...

Once we start letting...

Oh, here he comes.

I had him get it notarized.

Mary pleasant's on vacation.

She and Dixie bell Edwards
went on a hunting trip.

Where'd they go?

Oh, they went
down to great dismal swamp

to hunt black bear.

Well, how long they
gonna be gone?

Two weeks.

Eh, I'll see you, Barn.

Wait a minute, Otis.

You better go
into mt. Pilot

and find a notary public.

Oh, come on!

Now, Otis, are you
defying the law?

Am I, Andy?

Well, Otis, if I was you,
I'd just go ahead and do

what Barney says.

Yeah. See?

You go into mt. Pilot
and find a notary public

and get that back to me,
and that's an order.

Gosh, almighty, it's getting
so a fella can't fall down

without making it
a statewide issue!

Accident, huh?

Yeah.

County property.

Very interesting.

Well, Mr. Campbell,
how's the pain?

It's all right.
It don't hurt much.

Oh, that's so typical
of a knee injury.

Numbness where you've got
multiple contusions,

torn cartilage,

and probably already forming
calcium deposits.

I got all that in here?

Unquestionably.

Now, you, uh...
Probably tripped over something

as you were leaving the cell.

Hmm, might have been
or could have maybe slipped.

Obviously gross negligence

on the part of
the sheriff's office.

Mr. Campbell, I'd
like your permission

to start legal action.

Against Andy and Barney?!

Oh, no! Those boys
are my friends.

Oh, but you don't understand.

You don't understand.

No, you don't understand.

It wouldn't be against them.

It would be against the county.

And for a small sum.

As a matter of fact,

you would be doing
your friends a service.

Yeah

well, as soon as I
start legal action,

the county will be aware

that this jail is
not up to standards.

You know what they'll do?

They'll fix it up,
and your friends

will have a place they
can be mighty proud of.

Hey, I never thought of that.

New cots, too, huh?

Precisely.

I'd sure like to do something
nice for the boys, all right.

They've been mighty nice to me.

Then we'll proceed.

Yeah. It'll be my way
of saying thanks.

Here you go.
There it is.

Here.

"Occupant."

Yep.

"Occupant."

Yep.

"Occupant."

Mm-hmm. Pesky things.

What'd you do last night?

I had a date.

With Helen?

No. Juanita.

Juanita?

Yeah. Juanita at the diner.

My juanita?

What do you mean, your juanita?

She's everybody's juanita.

What you talking about?

I didn't have a date
with juanita.

I was over at Helen's.

I had you going
pretty good, huh?

What'd y'all do?

Well, we watched
a little "TV."

Mm-hmm. Lights out.

Oh, here's this thing from Otis.

Oh.

Must have dropped it in
the slot on his way home.

Oh. He got it notarized
all right.

Yeah.

You know, you just have
to keep after that Otis.

That's the only way
you get results.

Well, anyway, we got
a record of the accident now.

It'll pay off in the long run.

I believe I'll just make out
a separate folder for this form.

You know a Neil Bentley?

No, I don't believe so.

See, this way,
we'll always be able

to get our hands on this
anytime we need it.

Like right now.

Our friend Otis Campbell
and Neil Bentley

are suing us for $ , .

$ , ?

That's what we understand,
Floyd.

That's a lot of money.

Yes, it is.

Now, Floyd, you were
the only one in the room

at the time of the accident,

and we'd like to get your side
of the story

'cause you're liable
to be the star witness.

Star witness?

Oh. Oh. Oh, this
is a thrill.

Now, Floyd, listen...

What do you remember
about Otis' fall?

I'll have to drop a line
to my sister.

Floyd, the charge in this case
is going to be negligence.

Oh, negligence, yeah.

Well, I'll testify to that.

Yeah, there was negligence
all right.

Yeah, I'll back you up
on that, too.

There was lots of...

Floyd... no, Floyd,
you don't quite understand.

They're going to try to prove
that we were negligent.

Oh, they are?

Yeah.

Now, when you came in,
Barney was in the back room

and Otis was still in his cell,
right?

That's correct, yes.

Barney asked me
if I wanted a cup of coffee

and I said, "no."

I'd had a cup at breakfast, see,
and as a general rule,

I don't have another cup until,
oh, say, : .

I... I like that midmorning cup
of coffee, don't you?

Yeah.

Now, did you see Otis
come out of his cell?

Well, I was writing
in my little notebook

at the time, see,
but, uh, I saw the whole thing

out of the corner of my eye...
The whole thing.

What happened?

He fell down.

Okay.

We know he fell down, Floyd.

The question is,
how did he fall down?

Did he trip or did he slip

or did he walk into something or

well, uh, just let me think
about that be-because, uh...

Let me think, now.

Yeah. Yeah. What?

He fell down.

Floyd...

How do you do...

Sheriff Taylor?

I'm Neil Bentley,
Mr. Campbell's lawyer.

I was told
I could find you here.

Oh.

Uh, this is Floyd Lawson.

How do you do,
Mr. Lawson?

How do you do?

Oh, Otis' lawyer.

Well, this is indeed a pleasure.

Uh, uh, sheriff Taylor, uh,

what I have to
discuss is, naturally

of a very private nature.

Oh, you can talk
in front of Floyd.

Oh, yes, go right ahead.

We're all in this together.

I'm the star witness.

That's right.

You said you were coming
down here

for some
preliminary discussions.

Yes.

Now, whether you're aware
of it or not, sheriff,

Mr. Campbell suffered
a very severe injury.

That's what we understand.

That's beautiful fabric.

I've been looking
for a suit like that.

Floyd...
Oh.

Go ahead.

It occurred to me
we might be able

to save a lot of time
and legal complications

if we could work this thing out
without going to court.

You're talking
about a settlement.

Precisely.

I'm sure you could point out
to the county

that it would be... smart,
under the circumstances.

I see.

Is that sharkskin?

No.

Floyd...

What circumstances
are you talking about?

Well, sheriff Taylor,
the fact is

that Mr. Campbell suffered
a very serious injury

due to the obvious negligence
on the part

of the sheriff's office
upon his release

and I estimate, conservatively,

that he'll be incapacitated
for at least six months,

in which time
he'll be completely unable

to follow his usual pursuit.

Mr. Bentley, Mr. Campbell's
usual pursuit

is to take a bottle at one end,
tip it up,

and put his mouth
on the other end.

Now, I don't see how a bad knee

is going to interfere with that.

He told us he got that bad knee

from playing football
with his wife.

Playing football with...

Say, that's nice.

Did you get that
at mt. Pilot?

Floyd...

Now, what-what is
this negligence?

Well, very obvious...

A slippery floor leading
to multiple contusions...

Unquestionable bone damage.

Mmm.

Mmm-mmm.

Now, let me...
Let me just, uh,

see if I can get
all this straight now.

You're going to sue us
for $ , ... right?

Right.

Mmm. But you would prefer
a settlement, right?

Precisely.

You see, sheriff, my client
is suffering so terribly

that I just had to advise
him to sue for $ , ...

A nominal sum considering
the severity of his injury.

And you know
how messy it is going to court.

So, I urge you to urge them
to settle.

I understand.

Well, I've got to run.

Uh, do think about
it, won't you?

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Isn't that a nice man?

Sarah, get me the county
legal department.

You know something, Andy?

This proves just one thing.

What's that, Floyd?

If you want a good suit,
you got to go to mt. Pilot.

And the county legal department
says we could be liable, huh?

Yeah. Mr. Roberts,
the head attorney up there,

is going to come down
here one day next week...

See if he can get at the truth.

I can't understand
Otis doing this.

Sharper than a serpent's tooth.

Yeah.

Sharper than a serpent's tooth.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Hey...

Look at that.

Huh?

Yeah.

Let's go over there.

Otis?

Oh, hi, Andy.
Hi, Barn.

I didn't see y'all coming.

I see you're still limping.

I don't know
why you're doing this, Otis

but I want you to know

next week,
there'll be a lawyer here

from the county
legal department.

Well, that's fast action.

I'll let you know when

and you better have
some good answers.

Hey, look, Andy, this
ain't against you.

It's against the county.

You're nothin' but
a double-crosser, Otis.

Mr. Campbell, will...

You know what the county's
gonna do to the jail

after this thing is all over?

Will you please stop talking?

Let's go, Barn.

You fellas sound mad.

I'm only doing it
just because of you.

Yeah, thanks a lot!

See ya Saturday night, fellas.

Not if we can help it!

Hey, Andy...

You know something?

Otis is the only one
that really knows what happened,

and he's coming by
Saturday night.

Well, what of it?

Well, I think I got an angle...

A way of gettin' him to talk.

How?

You just leave that to me.

Yeah, this'll work, all right.

They do it in the movies
all the time.

Hi, Barney.

Hi, Otis.

I just been, uh,

gettin' everything ready
for you.

Oh.

Well, I suppose you'll want

to hold onto this, all right.

Oh, no, no, you-you keep that.

You just hold onto that tonight

in case that knee
starts bothering you, you know.

Oh, bless your heart, Barney.

Mighty nice of you.

Oh, then... you're really
not mad at me, eh?

Oh, no, these things happen.

Why don't you, uh...

Why don't you go ahead
and have a drink?

Well, here, Barney.

Oh, no, no, thanks,
but y go ahead.

I'll get you a cup.

There we go.

There you are.

Oh, I never drink alone

when there's another
man in the house.

It's impolite.

Go ahead.

Well...

Have a sip.

Just a sip.

Mmm.

Bottoms up.

Want to sit down?

Otis, we're pretty good friends,
aren't we?

Oh, sure.

This is one friendship
I have always cherished.

How's that?

I said this is one friendship
I have always cherished.

Well, then, Otis,

let me warn you

you're headin'
for a lotta trouble

with this lawsuit.

Uh, what do you mean, Barn?

Look, Otis, I want you
to tell me the truth...

The plain, unvarnished truth
about what happened.

You don't understand.

I'm doing you a favor suing you.

A favor?!

Come on, Otis, come clean!

Now, how did you fall?

I don't know.

I... maybe I slipped
or tripped or something.

All I know is I hurt my knee.

You don't expect me
or sheriff "traylor"

to believe that, do you?

Taylor.

That's what I said,
"sheriff traylor."

Believe me, Barney,
I wouldn't lie to you.

You're too old a friend,
a cherished friend.

You know you're
my cherished friend, don't you?

Right. And you know
something, Otis?

You're my cherished friend, too.

Soak your knee in this
pan of warm water.

It'll ease the pain.

We used to do this
in the boy scouts.

You're a real pal, Barney.

There's no sense
listening to that, Andy.

It's...
Just nothing.

I was just startin'
to get interested.

Do you mind?

Well, don't you believe me?

It's just somethin'
I, you know, tried,

and it, uh...
It didn't work.

Mm-hmm.

I want to hear it.

Otis, I know the pain
you must be having.

There's nothing hurts
worse than a torn calcium.

A torn calcium?

Well, I don't pretend
to be a doctor, Andy.

Now, this is a waste of time
listening to this.

I can tell you
exactly what happened.

It was just a trick.

It was all part of my... plan.

Uh-huh.
I want to hear the plan.

Here, let's get your knee

right down in that water there.

Steady, Barn.

Look, I'll hold your
knee and you hold me.

How's that?

He made me take a sip, Andy.

I see.

I guess this is why
my lawyer's suing for $ , .

And you deserve
every penny of it...

Very apparently.

I mean, a crooked lawyer
might have tried for ten.

Anything I can do to help, Otis,

you just count on your
old friend, Barney...Barney.

I hope it worked better
in the movies.

You don't understand, Andy.

He mad me take a drink with him.

I was just trying
to loosen his tongue.

I see.

It's just that I wasn't used
to that stuff

and I... I guess I got
a-an immediate liver reaction.

What else did you talk about?

Nothing.
Nothing.

I got a hold of myself

snapped out of it...
Went right on home.

That's the absolute truth.

Hmm.

♪ You're the flower
of my heart ♪

♪ Sweet Adeline... ♪

♪ Sweet Adeline ♪

Good.

Campbell...

Letdo the talking.

Oh, sure, you handle everything.

Good afternoon, everybody.

Hi, Andy.
Hi, Barney.

Did you get home all right
Saturday night?

I don't know what
you're talking about.

We were sitting in that cell...

Sit down, Otis.

The case papers, counselor.

Gee, Andy, you still mad at me?

May we begin, please?

Mr. Campbell, I should like
to hear your account

of the alleged accident.

Sir, if you don't mind

I... I'd like to guide my client
through this interrogation.

This is not an interrogation,
and I do mind.

Go ahead, Mr. Campbell.

I want to find out
what caused you to fall.

That's the big issue here.

Oh, isn't it rather obvious?

Look at that slippery floor
in that cell...

A clear case of negligence.

What do you mean,
slippery floor?

I've been around here five...

Barn, Barn,
don't, don't, don't...

I'll show you exactly
how it happened.

If you would, please.

See, I was all ready to leave,
as I usually do.

I reached up and got the key,

I put it in the door,
unlocked it, opened the door,

and I came out
just as calm as could be when...

Hey, that's how it happened.

Now I remember.

Be careful what you say.

Yeah, I tripped over my coat...

I can see it just as clear now...

And my feet got
all tangled up in it.

Sir, may I have a private talk
with my client?

Well, what's the matter?

I'll tell you what's
the matter, Otis.

I think you just blew
your lawyer's case.

May I ask for a postponement
of this hearing

on the grounds
that my-my client doesn't know

what he's saying?

Well, I do so.

I'm telling you

just exactly what happened,
and that's the truth.

Well...

Mr. Bentley...

Goodbye.

Oh, uh...

My card, in case
you ever need my services.

Good-bye.

Bye-bye.

Mr. Campbell, I gather
you're dropping your suit.

Well, I guess I am.

I just then remembered
that I tripped over my coat.

I was just trying
to do these fellas a favor.

Sheriff, I guess
that about wraps it up.

Otis, what is this favor
you keep talking about?

Well, Mr. Bentley said
if I sued you,

the county would come along
and fix this place up

so you'd have something
to be proud of.

Oh, brother, what a dumb thing.

Do you have any idea
the trouble you caused us?

You're the one that started this
with your dumb form.

You want to pipe down, Otis?

You gonna make me?
Yeah.

Hold it, hold it!

He started the whole...

I did not.
He started it.

You know, I was on to that
lawyer right from the start.

Were you, Barn?

Oh, he was nothing but a crook.

Is that so?

You know, he could wind up
getting himself disbarred.

Disbarred?
Would they do that to him?

I wouldn't be surprised.

They wouldn't allow him
to practice again?

That's right.

You mean take away his means
of livelihood?

Sure.

Huh.

I wonder if he'd be interested
in selling that suit.