07x15 - Farewell Letter
Posted: 01/14/22 07:39
MARY ALICE:
Previously on Desperate Housewives.
Beth had no idea Paul was told
the truth about her mother.
Felicia Tillman has gone
to some extraordinary lengths
to cause you harm.
In therapy, Gabby confronted her past.
When I was a child
my stepfather molested me.
Bree made a stunning revelation.
He's your son.
And two fathers...
He needs our help.
... reached out to a son in trouble.
Lynette Scavo had lost
a lot of sleep over the years.
There had been 3:00 a.m. Feedings.
Temperatures of 102.
And late-night pillow fights.
But Lynette had never complained,
because a mother...
PORTER: Mom?
... is always on call.
Do we have any eggs?
Yes, we have eggs.
Where do we keep them?
In the refrigerator.
Cool, thanks.
How do you make an omelet?
You don't have to come down.
Just tell us where the stuff is.
No, it's just easier if I do it
myself. Two omelets coming up.
Actually, could you make mine
an egg white scramble?
Girls? Hello.
Mom, this is Tiffany and Kimberly.
We met them at a keg party,
wandering around, looking for food.
Somebody scarfed all the chips
and stuff.
And we were like,
wouldn't it be awesome
to have Denver omelets right now?
'Cause I'm from Denver.
Really?
I'm getting more of a Vegas vibe.
Sidebar?
You woke me up
to cater your booty call?
Mom, this isn't a booty call.
I think you mean a "hookup."
A booty call is, like,
when you're feeling horny
and you pick up the phone...
Okay, I got it.
Look, this isn't a frat house,
this is our family home
and you can't bring your whatevers
here to seal the deal.
Why not?
We've been doing it for months.
Mom. We're not kids anymore.
Yeah, we're grown men.
Old enough to vote.
Old enough to die for our country.
Now where do we keep the eggs?
Under the sink, next to the fresh fruit.
Thanks.
Yes, Lynette Scavo had lost
a lot of sleep over the years,
and she was getting tired of it.
There are all sorts of ways to leave.
Some people shake hands.
Others offer a gentle wave.
A few like to give big hugs.
Then there are those who refuse
to leave until someone else says,
"Get out."
Morning, boys.
Why are you handing me
classified ads?
You have seven days
to find another place to live.
Whoa! Whoa! You're kicking us out?
You said I could stay here
until I finished college.
Yeah, we're starting to think
that's not going to happen.
Guys, please don't do this.
We like it here.
Of course you do.
You think doing laundry is throwing
dirty clothes in the hamper
and getting clean ones
out of the drawer.
That's how Dad does it.
Okay. Let's stay on topic.
Guys, you need to grow up.
Learn to be independent.
And that's going to start
with you getting your own place.
And how are we going to pay for it?
If you turn that paper over,
you'll find a whole section of people
willing to exchange money
for something called work.
We have to get jobs?
This is crazy! You guys are acting
like we stabbed you last night.
Oh, obviously you didn't do that.
You don't know where the knives are.
Now start making some calls.
(EXHALING)
You really think that they're ready?
No. And that's why we have to do this.
Those boys are drifting
through life, Tom.
If we don't do something soon,
we'll have twin 50-year-olds
living in the basement
screaming upstairs for juice.
You're right.
Unless we push them out of the nest,
they'll never learn to fly.
Mmm-hmm.
Do you have to dial a "1"
before the area code?
And the first chick lands with a thud.
Yes, I've been on hold
for, like, four miles.
I just got a notice that my insurance
is only covering partial payment
of my dialysis.
No. That can't be right.
I can't afford that, and I need
treatments three times a week...
(EX CLAIMING)
Damn it.
Not you. I just ruined my shirt
and saved a chipmunk's life
in the same move.
- This is not a good day.
- (SIREN WAILING)
Oh, crap.
Morning, ma'am.
Do you know why I pulled you over?
To commend me
for saving that chipmunk's life?
No.
You didn't come to a complete stop
at that stop sign on Ferndale.
License and registration, please.
I'm sorry,
I guess I was just really distracted.
I was trying to talk to the insurance
company and then the coffee spilled.
And now I'm going to be late
for my dialysis appointment,
which means that
all the good chairs will be taken
and I will end up in the chair
by the bathroom
and I will spend the next six hours
listening to people flush.
Dialysis? Man, that must be rough.
Yeah, and explains why I look a lot
more bloated than I do on my license.
Look, I don't want you to be late
for your appointment.
I'll let you off with a warning.
Oh. Really?
- Good luck, ma'am.
- Thank you.
And thank you, dialysis.
(SIGHING) I don't want
to go on this stupid trip.
It's only 24 hours.
Okay. Trust me, 24 hours in
my hometown feels like two years.
Those people are small-minded,
they're bigoted, and their teeth...
It's the land orthodontia forgot.
Well, it produced you,
so it can't be all bad.
(GROANS) Please. You know
what that town is famous for?
The second-longest-burning
tire fire in America.
Gabby, I think we both know
why you don't want to go.
And it's not about the town.
(SIGHING)
Okay, you're right.
But I don't care what my therapist says.
I don't want to fly to Texas
to stand on some dead guy's grave
and read him a letter.
That dead guy was your stepfather.
And he abused you.
When Dr. Wyner told you
to write down how you felt,
that helped, didn't it?
I guess.
Well, then I really think
you should listen to her
when she says that reading it
at his grave will help.
Confronting him will give you closure.
He's dead!
Can't I just confront him from
the comfort of my own home,
with a glass of wine
and an Ouija board?
If you absolutely don't want
to do this, you don't have to.
But I really wish you would.
Fine. Twenty-four hours.
One graveside rant,
and then we come home.
Why are you bringing evening wear?
It's the anniversary of the tire fire.
There's going to be a party.
We're almost there, Zach.
These people are going
to be able to help you.
(GROANING)
I don't need to go to rehab.
Tell that to the puke on my shoes.
Thank God
your mother never saw you like this.
Easy, Paul.
You can't make me go.
Zach, face it. You're going.
(PANTING) Okay. I will. I promise.
Tomorrow. Just let me out now.
Let go of me.
I'm trying to help you.
You? You... You did this to me.
You're the reason I'm like this.
You don't know
what the hell you're talking about.
Paul, ignore him. He's sick.
I'm not sick! He's sick!
I'm fine.
- You're fine?
- Ow!
You shot me. You shot your own father.
Does that sound "fine" to you?
Paul! Paul, let him go.
You're going to rehab.
You're going to take these dr*gs
and flush them out of you,
and then we're gonna talk.
Or I swear I will drive
your sorry ass to prison myself.
So, you can either dry out in rehab,
or take your chances in jail.
I'm good either way.
(EXHALING)
Let's go.
You want just the top.
Tip of your fingers right there
on the seam, right? Yeah. There.
Then when you throw the ball,
you whip your hand down, right?
It gets the... It gets it spinning faster.
Let's give it a shot.
Really whip those fingers.
Ow!
Take it easy!
Charlie, it's time to go.
No, Mom. Please? Five more minutes.
Sorry, sweetie, we have to get back
to the hotel and start packing.
Hey, you heard your mom.
I'll see you in the morning. Okay?
Plus, I need to ice down this hand.
I can't believe they're flying back
to Florida tomorrow.
I know. I wish you'd had a chance
to spend more time with him.
Yeah, I wish that, too.
Unfortunately, we lost a week
while you decided whether or not
to tell me they were here.
Yes. And again, I am so sorry.
That's my son.
How could you keep him from me?
What were you thinking?
I'm not proud of what I did.
But I didn't want to lose you.
Don't make it sound romantic.
What you did was unbelievably selfish.
I know.
If this relationship is gonna have
any future at all,
we have to at least
be honest with each other.
I feel terrible.
Just please don't be angry.
I am angry.
But mostly at this...
At this crappy situation.
You and me,
I'm sure that we'll get past this.
Mom, this is taking forever.
Tom & Jerry's on in 10 minutes.
I know, honey.
You promised we'd be home.
MJ, what do you want me to do?
I can't make these people disappear.
You promised.
(SIGHS)
I forgot foil. Will you go get me a roll?
Excuse me,
I know you're all probably in a hurry,
but would you mind
if I went in front of you?
You see,
I have my dialysis appointment
and if I'm late, I start to get a little weak.
You poor thing.
Bless you.
My aunt is on dialysis.
Well, my defective little kidney
and I thank you both.
All right!
We're gonna get to see Tom & Jerry!
Tom is my doctor, Jerry's his nurse.
And when I'm late,
boy, they really go at each other.
So this is it.
Yep. I was wrong.
It can be worse than I remembered.
It's not that bad.
Really?
Because when we asked the cabbie
to turn left at the burned-out car,
he said, "You're gonna have
to be a little more specific."
Uh-oh.
Get out a couple of singles.
You look lost. I take it
you folks aren't from around here.
Yes and no. Mostly no.
Wait a minute, you're not
Gabrielle Marquez, are you?
Yes. Do I know you?
No, but I know you
from all those magazines!
You're a supermodel!
Welcome back!
Well, thank you.
Looks like the old place
hasn't changed a bit.
Sounds like someone
hasn't seen the new stoplight yet.
So, what brings you back to town?
We should check in to the hotel.
Nice meeting you, lady.
Hotel? I thought
we were going to the cemetery first.
It's been a long trip, Carlos.
I just want to lie down for a few minutes.
(SIGHING)
So? Was the flight on time?
Yeah.
The one time I'm begging
for an eight-hour delay
and they leave the gate
three minutes early.
Keith.
(EXHALING)
Three days ago, I didn't even know
that this kid existed.
And now I don't know
how I'm going to live without him.
He's a wonderful little boy.
Yeah. Yeah, he is.
You know, my whole childhood,
my dad was in the army.
He'd be gone for six,
or seven months at a clip,
and then back for two weeks,
and gone again.
I always swore that
I would never do that to my kid.
And guess what? Here I am.
Keith, you are not your father.
I actually said to Charlie,
"I'll see you before you know it."
That's exactly
what my old man used to say to me.
And you know what it really meant?
"I have no idea when I'll see you."
I wish there was something I could do.
There's nothing anybody can do.
It is what it is.
Well, I think that's everything.
We're really proud of you guys.
Found your own apartment,
did it all on your own.
You really stepped up.
When can we see the new place?
Well, give us a few days,
let us get it all fixed up.
We should get going.
Hold on, hold on, this is a big moment.
Our boys have grown up.
Let me just get one shot.
Oh! I will treasure this memory always.
I love you.
Drive safe.
Okay. Call us when you get there.
PORTER: Yeah.
- Bye.
- Bye.
I know this is good for them,
but I have to tell you,
I miss them already.
(TOM LAUGHING)
What the hell?
Roy! Come on out!
Our new tenants are here!
(GASPS)
(SIGHING)
What are you doing?
Deleting a memory.
Yes, well, I really want to,
I just don't see how I can
with my dialysis schedule.
Yes, dialysis.
Really?
Well, thank you so much.
Jury duty, excused!
That was over the phone.
They didn't even get to see
my sad head tilt
with the trembling lower lip.
Susan, using your disease
to manipulate and deceive people.
I've never felt closer to you.
You know what? I deserve it.
I mean, it's the only perk
to come out of this whole thing.
This stupid disease
has totally changed my life.
I spend six hours a day, three times
a week hooked up to a machine.
So, you know,
if I get to cut in a few lines,
get out of a ticket, I'm doing it.
Ooh.
Do you really want to use
your powers for evil?
I'm listening.
Let's go to lunch at Girard's.
I've been dying to try that place out,
but they don't take reservations.
And you have to wait hours for a table.
Well, not with me, you don't.
I hope you don't take this
the wrong way,
but bad-kidney Susan,
way more fun than two-kidney Susan.
You sure you want to eat here?
I think I just saw two cockroaches
throwing up.
It's fine. Everyone in my family
used to come here.
Didrt they all die young
of heart disease?
Honey, you've seen this town.
Would you really want to grow old here?
Oh, my God, it's Gabrielle Marquez!
Finally!
We were wondering if you were ever
gonna make it back home again.
I am such a huge fan.
I even have one of your swimsuit
covers on my bathroom wall.
It's my "thinspiration."
Could you have your chauffeur
over here take a picture of us?
- Would you mind?
- Yeah.
Be happy to, sir.
Can I get your autograph?
My autograph?
You know, we even have
a nacho platter named after you.
It would be my honor to bring you one.
Sounds great. Only make it a scoop of
cottage cheese with sliced tomatoes.
Ms. Marquez?
Principal Gomez.
I run the school you used to attend.
Welcome back to Las Colinas.
You have no idea
how proud we are of you.
Seriously?
Yes, our young people
don't have any role models.
No one else from here
has ever been famous.
I mean, for anything besides
getting stuck down a well.
I can't believe all you people
remembered me. I had no idea.
You know, it would do so much
for school morale
if you would come by tomorrow
and speak to the girls.
Actually, we're kind of busy.
I could call the press.
But we're never too busy
to help girls in need. How's noon?
Gabby, our flight leaves at 10:00.
Flights can be changed.
I'm sorry. My chauffeur
has no sense of community.
(CHUCKLING)
Now who else wants
to take a picture with me?
(DOOR OPENING)
How did it go with Zach?
Did you get him checked in?
It's done.
You must be so relieved.
I know I am.
After the riot, when you talked
about us getting away,
I felt so hopeful.
But then it seemed like you,
I don't know,
pulled away?
You've been so cold and distant.
Not that I blame you.
I can't imagine
what you've been through.
No, you can't.
But now we can put it behind us.
Get back to how we were.
Start to build our life together.
I miss you. I miss
being close to you.
What is that?
(GASPS)
Your g*n.
I borrowed it.
Why did you feel you needed a g*n?
For protection. My son tried to k*ll me.
Fool me once...
What about you, Beth?
What do you mean?
I was just wondering why my bride
needed to bring a g*n into our home.
You have to admit,
it's not very romantic.
If the g*n bothers you,
we can get rid of it.
I don't understand.
Are you upset with me?
Is that why you've been acting this way?
Paul, please talk to me.
I have a lot on my mind.
Of course you do.
This whole thing has been a nightmare.
But we've come through it.
And with Zach getting help,
maybe things will be good now.
Really?
When someone so close betrays you,
can things ever be good again?
I thought of something
you could do for me.
(LAUGHING)
Again? But we just...
No. No, not that.
Remember yesterday
when you said you wished
there was something you could do
about the whole Charlie situation?
Mmm-hmm.
Well, there is.
Let's move to Florida.
What?
I've been thinking about this for hours.
With my job I can work anywhere.
You sold your business,
your kids are grown.
What's keeping you here?
My friends.
I will build a guest house.
And they can stay all winter.
Well, it would be an adventure.
Totally.
Come on. We'll pick oranges
and swim with dolphins,
and do all that other stuff
you do in Florida.
What do you say?
I think I can't.
Why?
Because this is my home.
I know.
(SIGHING)
There's just...
There's no other way for me
to be close to Charlie.
Unless...
Never mind.
Unless what?
Unless I move there without you.
And I can't do that.
Because long-distance relationships
don't ever work,
and I don't want to jeopardize
what you and I have.
Well, maybe we should talk about that.
No, no, no, forget it.
Forget the whole thing.
All right, I...
I just keep waiting
for an answer to appear
and there just isn't one.
Let's go back to sleep.
(SHUSHING)
Local newspaper.
So, since I've left Las Colinas,
I've been everywhere.
Paris, Rome, New York.
But the place I feel most at home,
probably New York.
No, thank you.
They're doing a cover story on me.
"Solis... So lovely." Isn't that great?
It is, it's just that I think
you're starting to lose track
of why we came here.
You still have some serious work to do.
When are we going to that cemetery?
I don't think I need to.
Then how are you planning
to get closure?
It's already happening.
This trip has been amazing.
Look, you have to understand,
when I lived in this town before,
I felt like nothing.
So to come back and get all this love
from all these people,
that's healing for me.
I feel so much better.
And I'm happy for you, Gabby.
I just don't know if it's enough.
It's enough for me, Carlos.
(PHONE RINGING)
Do you mind? That's the radio station.
Hello?
Yes, this is she. Absolutely, I'm all set.
"Hi. This is Gabrielle Marquez Solis,
"and when I'm in Las Colinas,
I get my farm report from KYAP."
This is not leaving the nest.
This is more like nest-adjacent.
I know. But Mrs. McCluskey
is a tough old broad.
If anyone can whip them into shape,
she can.
- (PHONE RINGING)
- I'll get it.
Hello?
KAREN:
How do you make a Denver omelet?
Why do you want to know?
'Cause I made some for the boys
and they didn't like them.
They said yours are better.
You know what? I'll be right over.
And I'm like, "You shut up."
And he's like, "No, you shut up!"
(ALL LAUGHING)
So, tell me, who shut up?
- Hi.
- Hi.
Hi, Mom.
Hi, Prestors mom!
Hi.
So what brings you here?
Your mom came by
to share a few recipes with me.
Good idea. We don't want a repeat
of last night's pork fiasco.
- (KIDS LAUGH)
- (BUZZING)
Dryer's done. I'll leave your clothes
at the foot of your beds.
- Whoa, whoa.
- What?
Please don't tell me
you're doing their laundry.
Oh, it's no bother.
We love having the boys here.
Don't we, Roy?
RO Y: Yeah.
Aside from them yelling out
the answers to Wheel of Fortune,
it's been a real treat.
But seriously. That's gotta stop.
The whole point of this
was to get them to grow up
and take care of themselves.
They've just moved
from my boob to yours.
Nice breakfast talk, Lynette.
They need to learn to be responsible.
This isn't good for them.
They're fine.
Your sons are nice,
upstanding young men.
Sure, for one night. Give them time.
Look, if they pull any shenanigans,
I'll give them the boot.
But so far,
they've been the perfect tenants.
Really?
They had girls spend the night.
You're okay with those two
walking around your house?
Look, I don't care
what gets Roy's fire going
as long as I'm the one who puts it out.
Now, girls, if it were up to me
I'd say avoid math and science,
they cause serious frown lines.
Gabby, please tell the nice girls
you're joking.
No. Young girls today need to know
the dangers of long division.
Excuse me, girls.
Gabby, I have someone who I'm sure
you want to say hello to.
Hello, Gabrielle.
You must remember Sister Marta.
She's been with us almost 30 years.
A real treasure.
Of course.
I'll let you two catch up.
So, Gabrielle, what brings you back?
I have some personal business.
Well, it looks like
you're enjoying yourself.
I'm not surprised.
You always did love being
the center of attention.
You didn't seem too thrilled to see her.
Who is she?
Gabby?
I'll be right back.
We need to talk.
All right.
Do you remember a discussion
we had here 20 years ago?
(LAUGHS)
I've had a lot of students
over the years, Gabrielle.
I can't remember everything.
I think you remember this conversation.
I told you what was happening
with my stepfather.
Yes, you had a big imagination.
Most likely from all of those
trashy books and magazines
you used to sneak into class.
Oh, my God. You still don't believe me.
I came to you with a secret.
A horrible secret.
I couldn't tell my mother
or anyone in my family.
But I thought I could trust you
because you were my teacher.
And a nun.
So I told you.
Do you remember what you said to me?
I'm not going to stand here
and listen to this.
Yes, you are.
You told me I was a liar,
and that I should be ashamed of myself.
And I have been ashamed ever since.
Is that why you came back here?
To blame me?
No, I came back here because
my therapist had a crazy idea.
She thought it would help
if I stood on the grave of the man
who abused me
and told him how I felt.
But you know what?
I think I need to tell you.
I did not deserve what happened to me.
I was a child.
But you, you were a grown-up
and you did nothing.
You should be ashamed of yourself.
Everything okay?
Yes.
We can go home now.
(DOORBELL RINGING)
Hi. I brought you
a little housewarming present.
Is it ticking?
Look, I know
I have been hard on you guys.
But you landed on your feet,
and this is just my way of saying,
"Have a blast." You deserve it.
You're kidding!
Wow. A whole keg?
We can't drink that by ourselves.
Well, maybe you should have a party.
Yeah, it's a chance to show everyone
your new digs.
Everyone.
I can wait all day.
(SIGHING)
Look, I already told you
I'm not going to the police.
I just want to know.
Why did you sh**t me?
Because I wanted you to die.
(SCOFFS)
Too vague?
Okay, I'm gonna try to be more specific.
All my life I hated you.
That is not true.
It is true.
That hate was always a part of me.
But it started getting bigger.
And then one day I realized
it was the only thing that I was.
That was the dr*gs
making you think that way.
I know that you want to believe that,
but no, that was you, you did this to me.
You do this to everyone.
You're evil.
You have no idea what I am,
how I feel, what I've been through.
When your mother, that horrible day...
No, no, no. You don't get to use that
to explain who you are.
You are the reason Mom k*lled herself.
Don't say that.
It isn't true.
Wow, that really hurt, didn't it?
Maybe trying to k*ll you was stupid.
'Cause you being alive and
knowing the truth, that's way better.
Your mother loved me.
No one could ever love you.
PORTER AND PRESTON:
Ow! Ow! Ow!
I'm returning these. They're defective.
I saw what happened
to the front of your house.
Boys, how could you?
That's nothing.
You should see the inside.
They broke three
of my collectible shot glasses.
I was this close
to having one from every state.
You think I want to go back
to Wyoming?
What do you have to say
to Mrs. McCluskey?
Can we get our security deposit back?
Monsters.
So, what's for breakfast?
Nothing.
Fine. I'm going upstairs to crash.
No! No!
Once you are done cleaning up
over at Mrs. McCluskey's,
you guys are hitting
the rental ads again.
What? We just got evicted,
and we're really hung over.
This is not a good time.
I don't believe you guys.
You are fully grown men
and you can't do anything
for yourselves.
You are just so helpless.
Gee, I wonder how we got that way?
What's that supposed to mean?
Every time we try and do something,
you say, "It's easier if I do it myself."
Yeah. We'd be happy to do stuff,
but you always take over.
It's like you don't want us
to do anything for ourselves.
You know what? You're right.
We are?
I guess I just wanted you
to stay kids for as long as possible.
Because I grew up with a crazy mom
and two sisters to take care of.
I was doing dishes and laundry
when I should have been out riding
bikes and throwing water balloons.
I wanted you to have a childhood.
But I let it go on too long.
So I'm sorry.
This is my fault.
But it is time for you to go out
and start your own lives.
Okay.
Okay.
But before we go,
can you make us an omelet?
(LAUGHS)
Yes.
Actually, no.
But I'll teach you to make one.
Pretty impressive.
You're thinking about Charlie,
aren't you?
Maybe I need something
to get my mind off of him.
How about a movie?
You shouldn't have
to get your mind off of him.
He's your son.
That's why you need to move to Florida.
No. That was a bad idea.
I already told you,
I'm not going there without you.
Long-distance relationships
don't ever work.
That's true. Unfortunately,
you're in one right now with Charlie.
Face it. One of these relationships
isn't going to make it.
And it has to be ours.
Well, here's the only problem with that,
I love you.
I love you, too.
Good. Then you know why I won't leave.
Here's what I know.
From the first day we met,
I have been pretending
that our age difference
doesn't mean anything.
Because it doesn't.
It does. It means I have lived
through more of life than you.
Including having children.
Which is something you desperately
wanted, and now you have.
Bree, come on.
And while I have fallen in and out
of love with several men in my life,
I have never fallen out of love
with my children.
And you may think that you will never
love another woman like you love me,
but I know that you will.
I don't see how that's possible.
That's because you're young.
You have given me so much, Keith.
Please.
Let me give this to you.
Hi, there, we'd like a table, please.
I'm sorry,
you're looking at a two-hour wait.
Susan.
Do you think
that you could squeeze us in?
Because I have a dialysis appointment
in an hour.
Oh...
It's just, we're so slammed...
Just like my kidney.
Let me see what I can do.
MAN: Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on there.
Why is she getting a table before us?
We've been waiting 45 minutes.
Sir, she's lost both of her kidneys.
A booth would be great.
Well, I'm a diabetic
and my wife has rheumatoid arthritis,
you don't see us
trying to get any special treatment.
You don't understand. I'm on dialysis.
Arthritis, diabetes, dialysis.
So, unless somebody here has Ebola,
I think we should get the next table.
You think there isn't anybody in this
place who doesn't have something?
We all have something.
I have restless leg syndrome.
Shut up.
The only thing special about you
is you think you're more special
than the rest of us. You're not.
Now get to the back of the line.
You, too, sister.
She used to be married to a Yankee.
Nothing? Okay.
I hope you know
this means you're paying.
I have to sit down. I don't feel well.
(SIGHS)
Nice try. We're not getting a table.
Really, I don't feel well.
Susan, get up. No one's even looking.
Susan?
Susan!
Oh, my God! Someone call 911!
Are you going away?
No.
You are.
- Paul!
- Come on!
Stop! What are you doing?
I want you out. Do you hear me?
Why? What have I done?
I know.
What?
I know who you are.
Paul, please listen to me.
At least Felicia had the guts
to hate me to my face. You hid it.
I don't hate you. I don't.
- Get out, you lying b*tch.
- I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
Okay, yes, I did lie. At first.
And yes, I hated you
because she told me to.
Get out!
But that changed. You changed me.
I don't care what she says anymore.
Please, Paul. Forgive me. Please.
I love you. I swear to God, I love you.
No, you don't.
No one could ever love me.
(GASPS)
Don't forget your g*n.
MARY ALICE:
Leaving is never easy.
But the time comes
when we must move on.
So we can leave our childhood behind.
So we can let go of the past.
So we can be a good parent.
Yes, leaving is never easy.
Especially for those
who have nowhere else to go.
(CRYING)
Previously on Desperate Housewives.
Beth had no idea Paul was told
the truth about her mother.
Felicia Tillman has gone
to some extraordinary lengths
to cause you harm.
In therapy, Gabby confronted her past.
When I was a child
my stepfather molested me.
Bree made a stunning revelation.
He's your son.
And two fathers...
He needs our help.
... reached out to a son in trouble.
Lynette Scavo had lost
a lot of sleep over the years.
There had been 3:00 a.m. Feedings.
Temperatures of 102.
And late-night pillow fights.
But Lynette had never complained,
because a mother...
PORTER: Mom?
... is always on call.
Do we have any eggs?
Yes, we have eggs.
Where do we keep them?
In the refrigerator.
Cool, thanks.
How do you make an omelet?
You don't have to come down.
Just tell us where the stuff is.
No, it's just easier if I do it
myself. Two omelets coming up.
Actually, could you make mine
an egg white scramble?
Girls? Hello.
Mom, this is Tiffany and Kimberly.
We met them at a keg party,
wandering around, looking for food.
Somebody scarfed all the chips
and stuff.
And we were like,
wouldn't it be awesome
to have Denver omelets right now?
'Cause I'm from Denver.
Really?
I'm getting more of a Vegas vibe.
Sidebar?
You woke me up
to cater your booty call?
Mom, this isn't a booty call.
I think you mean a "hookup."
A booty call is, like,
when you're feeling horny
and you pick up the phone...
Okay, I got it.
Look, this isn't a frat house,
this is our family home
and you can't bring your whatevers
here to seal the deal.
Why not?
We've been doing it for months.
Mom. We're not kids anymore.
Yeah, we're grown men.
Old enough to vote.
Old enough to die for our country.
Now where do we keep the eggs?
Under the sink, next to the fresh fruit.
Thanks.
Yes, Lynette Scavo had lost
a lot of sleep over the years,
and she was getting tired of it.
There are all sorts of ways to leave.
Some people shake hands.
Others offer a gentle wave.
A few like to give big hugs.
Then there are those who refuse
to leave until someone else says,
"Get out."
Morning, boys.
Why are you handing me
classified ads?
You have seven days
to find another place to live.
Whoa! Whoa! You're kicking us out?
You said I could stay here
until I finished college.
Yeah, we're starting to think
that's not going to happen.
Guys, please don't do this.
We like it here.
Of course you do.
You think doing laundry is throwing
dirty clothes in the hamper
and getting clean ones
out of the drawer.
That's how Dad does it.
Okay. Let's stay on topic.
Guys, you need to grow up.
Learn to be independent.
And that's going to start
with you getting your own place.
And how are we going to pay for it?
If you turn that paper over,
you'll find a whole section of people
willing to exchange money
for something called work.
We have to get jobs?
This is crazy! You guys are acting
like we stabbed you last night.
Oh, obviously you didn't do that.
You don't know where the knives are.
Now start making some calls.
(EXHALING)
You really think that they're ready?
No. And that's why we have to do this.
Those boys are drifting
through life, Tom.
If we don't do something soon,
we'll have twin 50-year-olds
living in the basement
screaming upstairs for juice.
You're right.
Unless we push them out of the nest,
they'll never learn to fly.
Mmm-hmm.
Do you have to dial a "1"
before the area code?
And the first chick lands with a thud.
Yes, I've been on hold
for, like, four miles.
I just got a notice that my insurance
is only covering partial payment
of my dialysis.
No. That can't be right.
I can't afford that, and I need
treatments three times a week...
(EX CLAIMING)
Damn it.
Not you. I just ruined my shirt
and saved a chipmunk's life
in the same move.
- This is not a good day.
- (SIREN WAILING)
Oh, crap.
Morning, ma'am.
Do you know why I pulled you over?
To commend me
for saving that chipmunk's life?
No.
You didn't come to a complete stop
at that stop sign on Ferndale.
License and registration, please.
I'm sorry,
I guess I was just really distracted.
I was trying to talk to the insurance
company and then the coffee spilled.
And now I'm going to be late
for my dialysis appointment,
which means that
all the good chairs will be taken
and I will end up in the chair
by the bathroom
and I will spend the next six hours
listening to people flush.
Dialysis? Man, that must be rough.
Yeah, and explains why I look a lot
more bloated than I do on my license.
Look, I don't want you to be late
for your appointment.
I'll let you off with a warning.
Oh. Really?
- Good luck, ma'am.
- Thank you.
And thank you, dialysis.
(SIGHING) I don't want
to go on this stupid trip.
It's only 24 hours.
Okay. Trust me, 24 hours in
my hometown feels like two years.
Those people are small-minded,
they're bigoted, and their teeth...
It's the land orthodontia forgot.
Well, it produced you,
so it can't be all bad.
(GROANS) Please. You know
what that town is famous for?
The second-longest-burning
tire fire in America.
Gabby, I think we both know
why you don't want to go.
And it's not about the town.
(SIGHING)
Okay, you're right.
But I don't care what my therapist says.
I don't want to fly to Texas
to stand on some dead guy's grave
and read him a letter.
That dead guy was your stepfather.
And he abused you.
When Dr. Wyner told you
to write down how you felt,
that helped, didn't it?
I guess.
Well, then I really think
you should listen to her
when she says that reading it
at his grave will help.
Confronting him will give you closure.
He's dead!
Can't I just confront him from
the comfort of my own home,
with a glass of wine
and an Ouija board?
If you absolutely don't want
to do this, you don't have to.
But I really wish you would.
Fine. Twenty-four hours.
One graveside rant,
and then we come home.
Why are you bringing evening wear?
It's the anniversary of the tire fire.
There's going to be a party.
We're almost there, Zach.
These people are going
to be able to help you.
(GROANING)
I don't need to go to rehab.
Tell that to the puke on my shoes.
Thank God
your mother never saw you like this.
Easy, Paul.
You can't make me go.
Zach, face it. You're going.
(PANTING) Okay. I will. I promise.
Tomorrow. Just let me out now.
Let go of me.
I'm trying to help you.
You? You... You did this to me.
You're the reason I'm like this.
You don't know
what the hell you're talking about.
Paul, ignore him. He's sick.
I'm not sick! He's sick!
I'm fine.
- You're fine?
- Ow!
You shot me. You shot your own father.
Does that sound "fine" to you?
Paul! Paul, let him go.
You're going to rehab.
You're going to take these dr*gs
and flush them out of you,
and then we're gonna talk.
Or I swear I will drive
your sorry ass to prison myself.
So, you can either dry out in rehab,
or take your chances in jail.
I'm good either way.
(EXHALING)
Let's go.
You want just the top.
Tip of your fingers right there
on the seam, right? Yeah. There.
Then when you throw the ball,
you whip your hand down, right?
It gets the... It gets it spinning faster.
Let's give it a shot.
Really whip those fingers.
Ow!
Take it easy!
Charlie, it's time to go.
No, Mom. Please? Five more minutes.
Sorry, sweetie, we have to get back
to the hotel and start packing.
Hey, you heard your mom.
I'll see you in the morning. Okay?
Plus, I need to ice down this hand.
I can't believe they're flying back
to Florida tomorrow.
I know. I wish you'd had a chance
to spend more time with him.
Yeah, I wish that, too.
Unfortunately, we lost a week
while you decided whether or not
to tell me they were here.
Yes. And again, I am so sorry.
That's my son.
How could you keep him from me?
What were you thinking?
I'm not proud of what I did.
But I didn't want to lose you.
Don't make it sound romantic.
What you did was unbelievably selfish.
I know.
If this relationship is gonna have
any future at all,
we have to at least
be honest with each other.
I feel terrible.
Just please don't be angry.
I am angry.
But mostly at this...
At this crappy situation.
You and me,
I'm sure that we'll get past this.
Mom, this is taking forever.
Tom & Jerry's on in 10 minutes.
I know, honey.
You promised we'd be home.
MJ, what do you want me to do?
I can't make these people disappear.
You promised.
(SIGHS)
I forgot foil. Will you go get me a roll?
Excuse me,
I know you're all probably in a hurry,
but would you mind
if I went in front of you?
You see,
I have my dialysis appointment
and if I'm late, I start to get a little weak.
You poor thing.
Bless you.
My aunt is on dialysis.
Well, my defective little kidney
and I thank you both.
All right!
We're gonna get to see Tom & Jerry!
Tom is my doctor, Jerry's his nurse.
And when I'm late,
boy, they really go at each other.
So this is it.
Yep. I was wrong.
It can be worse than I remembered.
It's not that bad.
Really?
Because when we asked the cabbie
to turn left at the burned-out car,
he said, "You're gonna have
to be a little more specific."
Uh-oh.
Get out a couple of singles.
You look lost. I take it
you folks aren't from around here.
Yes and no. Mostly no.
Wait a minute, you're not
Gabrielle Marquez, are you?
Yes. Do I know you?
No, but I know you
from all those magazines!
You're a supermodel!
Welcome back!
Well, thank you.
Looks like the old place
hasn't changed a bit.
Sounds like someone
hasn't seen the new stoplight yet.
So, what brings you back to town?
We should check in to the hotel.
Nice meeting you, lady.
Hotel? I thought
we were going to the cemetery first.
It's been a long trip, Carlos.
I just want to lie down for a few minutes.
(SIGHING)
So? Was the flight on time?
Yeah.
The one time I'm begging
for an eight-hour delay
and they leave the gate
three minutes early.
Keith.
(EXHALING)
Three days ago, I didn't even know
that this kid existed.
And now I don't know
how I'm going to live without him.
He's a wonderful little boy.
Yeah. Yeah, he is.
You know, my whole childhood,
my dad was in the army.
He'd be gone for six,
or seven months at a clip,
and then back for two weeks,
and gone again.
I always swore that
I would never do that to my kid.
And guess what? Here I am.
Keith, you are not your father.
I actually said to Charlie,
"I'll see you before you know it."
That's exactly
what my old man used to say to me.
And you know what it really meant?
"I have no idea when I'll see you."
I wish there was something I could do.
There's nothing anybody can do.
It is what it is.
Well, I think that's everything.
We're really proud of you guys.
Found your own apartment,
did it all on your own.
You really stepped up.
When can we see the new place?
Well, give us a few days,
let us get it all fixed up.
We should get going.
Hold on, hold on, this is a big moment.
Our boys have grown up.
Let me just get one shot.
Oh! I will treasure this memory always.
I love you.
Drive safe.
Okay. Call us when you get there.
PORTER: Yeah.
- Bye.
- Bye.
I know this is good for them,
but I have to tell you,
I miss them already.
(TOM LAUGHING)
What the hell?
Roy! Come on out!
Our new tenants are here!
(GASPS)
(SIGHING)
What are you doing?
Deleting a memory.
Yes, well, I really want to,
I just don't see how I can
with my dialysis schedule.
Yes, dialysis.
Really?
Well, thank you so much.
Jury duty, excused!
That was over the phone.
They didn't even get to see
my sad head tilt
with the trembling lower lip.
Susan, using your disease
to manipulate and deceive people.
I've never felt closer to you.
You know what? I deserve it.
I mean, it's the only perk
to come out of this whole thing.
This stupid disease
has totally changed my life.
I spend six hours a day, three times
a week hooked up to a machine.
So, you know,
if I get to cut in a few lines,
get out of a ticket, I'm doing it.
Ooh.
Do you really want to use
your powers for evil?
I'm listening.
Let's go to lunch at Girard's.
I've been dying to try that place out,
but they don't take reservations.
And you have to wait hours for a table.
Well, not with me, you don't.
I hope you don't take this
the wrong way,
but bad-kidney Susan,
way more fun than two-kidney Susan.
You sure you want to eat here?
I think I just saw two cockroaches
throwing up.
It's fine. Everyone in my family
used to come here.
Didrt they all die young
of heart disease?
Honey, you've seen this town.
Would you really want to grow old here?
Oh, my God, it's Gabrielle Marquez!
Finally!
We were wondering if you were ever
gonna make it back home again.
I am such a huge fan.
I even have one of your swimsuit
covers on my bathroom wall.
It's my "thinspiration."
Could you have your chauffeur
over here take a picture of us?
- Would you mind?
- Yeah.
Be happy to, sir.
Can I get your autograph?
My autograph?
You know, we even have
a nacho platter named after you.
It would be my honor to bring you one.
Sounds great. Only make it a scoop of
cottage cheese with sliced tomatoes.
Ms. Marquez?
Principal Gomez.
I run the school you used to attend.
Welcome back to Las Colinas.
You have no idea
how proud we are of you.
Seriously?
Yes, our young people
don't have any role models.
No one else from here
has ever been famous.
I mean, for anything besides
getting stuck down a well.
I can't believe all you people
remembered me. I had no idea.
You know, it would do so much
for school morale
if you would come by tomorrow
and speak to the girls.
Actually, we're kind of busy.
I could call the press.
But we're never too busy
to help girls in need. How's noon?
Gabby, our flight leaves at 10:00.
Flights can be changed.
I'm sorry. My chauffeur
has no sense of community.
(CHUCKLING)
Now who else wants
to take a picture with me?
(DOOR OPENING)
How did it go with Zach?
Did you get him checked in?
It's done.
You must be so relieved.
I know I am.
After the riot, when you talked
about us getting away,
I felt so hopeful.
But then it seemed like you,
I don't know,
pulled away?
You've been so cold and distant.
Not that I blame you.
I can't imagine
what you've been through.
No, you can't.
But now we can put it behind us.
Get back to how we were.
Start to build our life together.
I miss you. I miss
being close to you.
What is that?
(GASPS)
Your g*n.
I borrowed it.
Why did you feel you needed a g*n?
For protection. My son tried to k*ll me.
Fool me once...
What about you, Beth?
What do you mean?
I was just wondering why my bride
needed to bring a g*n into our home.
You have to admit,
it's not very romantic.
If the g*n bothers you,
we can get rid of it.
I don't understand.
Are you upset with me?
Is that why you've been acting this way?
Paul, please talk to me.
I have a lot on my mind.
Of course you do.
This whole thing has been a nightmare.
But we've come through it.
And with Zach getting help,
maybe things will be good now.
Really?
When someone so close betrays you,
can things ever be good again?
I thought of something
you could do for me.
(LAUGHING)
Again? But we just...
No. No, not that.
Remember yesterday
when you said you wished
there was something you could do
about the whole Charlie situation?
Mmm-hmm.
Well, there is.
Let's move to Florida.
What?
I've been thinking about this for hours.
With my job I can work anywhere.
You sold your business,
your kids are grown.
What's keeping you here?
My friends.
I will build a guest house.
And they can stay all winter.
Well, it would be an adventure.
Totally.
Come on. We'll pick oranges
and swim with dolphins,
and do all that other stuff
you do in Florida.
What do you say?
I think I can't.
Why?
Because this is my home.
I know.
(SIGHING)
There's just...
There's no other way for me
to be close to Charlie.
Unless...
Never mind.
Unless what?
Unless I move there without you.
And I can't do that.
Because long-distance relationships
don't ever work,
and I don't want to jeopardize
what you and I have.
Well, maybe we should talk about that.
No, no, no, forget it.
Forget the whole thing.
All right, I...
I just keep waiting
for an answer to appear
and there just isn't one.
Let's go back to sleep.
(SHUSHING)
Local newspaper.
So, since I've left Las Colinas,
I've been everywhere.
Paris, Rome, New York.
But the place I feel most at home,
probably New York.
No, thank you.
They're doing a cover story on me.
"Solis... So lovely." Isn't that great?
It is, it's just that I think
you're starting to lose track
of why we came here.
You still have some serious work to do.
When are we going to that cemetery?
I don't think I need to.
Then how are you planning
to get closure?
It's already happening.
This trip has been amazing.
Look, you have to understand,
when I lived in this town before,
I felt like nothing.
So to come back and get all this love
from all these people,
that's healing for me.
I feel so much better.
And I'm happy for you, Gabby.
I just don't know if it's enough.
It's enough for me, Carlos.
(PHONE RINGING)
Do you mind? That's the radio station.
Hello?
Yes, this is she. Absolutely, I'm all set.
"Hi. This is Gabrielle Marquez Solis,
"and when I'm in Las Colinas,
I get my farm report from KYAP."
This is not leaving the nest.
This is more like nest-adjacent.
I know. But Mrs. McCluskey
is a tough old broad.
If anyone can whip them into shape,
she can.
- (PHONE RINGING)
- I'll get it.
Hello?
KAREN:
How do you make a Denver omelet?
Why do you want to know?
'Cause I made some for the boys
and they didn't like them.
They said yours are better.
You know what? I'll be right over.
And I'm like, "You shut up."
And he's like, "No, you shut up!"
(ALL LAUGHING)
So, tell me, who shut up?
- Hi.
- Hi.
Hi, Mom.
Hi, Prestors mom!
Hi.
So what brings you here?
Your mom came by
to share a few recipes with me.
Good idea. We don't want a repeat
of last night's pork fiasco.
- (KIDS LAUGH)
- (BUZZING)
Dryer's done. I'll leave your clothes
at the foot of your beds.
- Whoa, whoa.
- What?
Please don't tell me
you're doing their laundry.
Oh, it's no bother.
We love having the boys here.
Don't we, Roy?
RO Y: Yeah.
Aside from them yelling out
the answers to Wheel of Fortune,
it's been a real treat.
But seriously. That's gotta stop.
The whole point of this
was to get them to grow up
and take care of themselves.
They've just moved
from my boob to yours.
Nice breakfast talk, Lynette.
They need to learn to be responsible.
This isn't good for them.
They're fine.
Your sons are nice,
upstanding young men.
Sure, for one night. Give them time.
Look, if they pull any shenanigans,
I'll give them the boot.
But so far,
they've been the perfect tenants.
Really?
They had girls spend the night.
You're okay with those two
walking around your house?
Look, I don't care
what gets Roy's fire going
as long as I'm the one who puts it out.
Now, girls, if it were up to me
I'd say avoid math and science,
they cause serious frown lines.
Gabby, please tell the nice girls
you're joking.
No. Young girls today need to know
the dangers of long division.
Excuse me, girls.
Gabby, I have someone who I'm sure
you want to say hello to.
Hello, Gabrielle.
You must remember Sister Marta.
She's been with us almost 30 years.
A real treasure.
Of course.
I'll let you two catch up.
So, Gabrielle, what brings you back?
I have some personal business.
Well, it looks like
you're enjoying yourself.
I'm not surprised.
You always did love being
the center of attention.
You didn't seem too thrilled to see her.
Who is she?
Gabby?
I'll be right back.
We need to talk.
All right.
Do you remember a discussion
we had here 20 years ago?
(LAUGHS)
I've had a lot of students
over the years, Gabrielle.
I can't remember everything.
I think you remember this conversation.
I told you what was happening
with my stepfather.
Yes, you had a big imagination.
Most likely from all of those
trashy books and magazines
you used to sneak into class.
Oh, my God. You still don't believe me.
I came to you with a secret.
A horrible secret.
I couldn't tell my mother
or anyone in my family.
But I thought I could trust you
because you were my teacher.
And a nun.
So I told you.
Do you remember what you said to me?
I'm not going to stand here
and listen to this.
Yes, you are.
You told me I was a liar,
and that I should be ashamed of myself.
And I have been ashamed ever since.
Is that why you came back here?
To blame me?
No, I came back here because
my therapist had a crazy idea.
She thought it would help
if I stood on the grave of the man
who abused me
and told him how I felt.
But you know what?
I think I need to tell you.
I did not deserve what happened to me.
I was a child.
But you, you were a grown-up
and you did nothing.
You should be ashamed of yourself.
Everything okay?
Yes.
We can go home now.
(DOORBELL RINGING)
Hi. I brought you
a little housewarming present.
Is it ticking?
Look, I know
I have been hard on you guys.
But you landed on your feet,
and this is just my way of saying,
"Have a blast." You deserve it.
You're kidding!
Wow. A whole keg?
We can't drink that by ourselves.
Well, maybe you should have a party.
Yeah, it's a chance to show everyone
your new digs.
Everyone.
I can wait all day.
(SIGHING)
Look, I already told you
I'm not going to the police.
I just want to know.
Why did you sh**t me?
Because I wanted you to die.
(SCOFFS)
Too vague?
Okay, I'm gonna try to be more specific.
All my life I hated you.
That is not true.
It is true.
That hate was always a part of me.
But it started getting bigger.
And then one day I realized
it was the only thing that I was.
That was the dr*gs
making you think that way.
I know that you want to believe that,
but no, that was you, you did this to me.
You do this to everyone.
You're evil.
You have no idea what I am,
how I feel, what I've been through.
When your mother, that horrible day...
No, no, no. You don't get to use that
to explain who you are.
You are the reason Mom k*lled herself.
Don't say that.
It isn't true.
Wow, that really hurt, didn't it?
Maybe trying to k*ll you was stupid.
'Cause you being alive and
knowing the truth, that's way better.
Your mother loved me.
No one could ever love you.
PORTER AND PRESTON:
Ow! Ow! Ow!
I'm returning these. They're defective.
I saw what happened
to the front of your house.
Boys, how could you?
That's nothing.
You should see the inside.
They broke three
of my collectible shot glasses.
I was this close
to having one from every state.
You think I want to go back
to Wyoming?
What do you have to say
to Mrs. McCluskey?
Can we get our security deposit back?
Monsters.
So, what's for breakfast?
Nothing.
Fine. I'm going upstairs to crash.
No! No!
Once you are done cleaning up
over at Mrs. McCluskey's,
you guys are hitting
the rental ads again.
What? We just got evicted,
and we're really hung over.
This is not a good time.
I don't believe you guys.
You are fully grown men
and you can't do anything
for yourselves.
You are just so helpless.
Gee, I wonder how we got that way?
What's that supposed to mean?
Every time we try and do something,
you say, "It's easier if I do it myself."
Yeah. We'd be happy to do stuff,
but you always take over.
It's like you don't want us
to do anything for ourselves.
You know what? You're right.
We are?
I guess I just wanted you
to stay kids for as long as possible.
Because I grew up with a crazy mom
and two sisters to take care of.
I was doing dishes and laundry
when I should have been out riding
bikes and throwing water balloons.
I wanted you to have a childhood.
But I let it go on too long.
So I'm sorry.
This is my fault.
But it is time for you to go out
and start your own lives.
Okay.
Okay.
But before we go,
can you make us an omelet?
(LAUGHS)
Yes.
Actually, no.
But I'll teach you to make one.
Pretty impressive.
You're thinking about Charlie,
aren't you?
Maybe I need something
to get my mind off of him.
How about a movie?
You shouldn't have
to get your mind off of him.
He's your son.
That's why you need to move to Florida.
No. That was a bad idea.
I already told you,
I'm not going there without you.
Long-distance relationships
don't ever work.
That's true. Unfortunately,
you're in one right now with Charlie.
Face it. One of these relationships
isn't going to make it.
And it has to be ours.
Well, here's the only problem with that,
I love you.
I love you, too.
Good. Then you know why I won't leave.
Here's what I know.
From the first day we met,
I have been pretending
that our age difference
doesn't mean anything.
Because it doesn't.
It does. It means I have lived
through more of life than you.
Including having children.
Which is something you desperately
wanted, and now you have.
Bree, come on.
And while I have fallen in and out
of love with several men in my life,
I have never fallen out of love
with my children.
And you may think that you will never
love another woman like you love me,
but I know that you will.
I don't see how that's possible.
That's because you're young.
You have given me so much, Keith.
Please.
Let me give this to you.
Hi, there, we'd like a table, please.
I'm sorry,
you're looking at a two-hour wait.
Susan.
Do you think
that you could squeeze us in?
Because I have a dialysis appointment
in an hour.
Oh...
It's just, we're so slammed...
Just like my kidney.
Let me see what I can do.
MAN: Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on there.
Why is she getting a table before us?
We've been waiting 45 minutes.
Sir, she's lost both of her kidneys.
A booth would be great.
Well, I'm a diabetic
and my wife has rheumatoid arthritis,
you don't see us
trying to get any special treatment.
You don't understand. I'm on dialysis.
Arthritis, diabetes, dialysis.
So, unless somebody here has Ebola,
I think we should get the next table.
You think there isn't anybody in this
place who doesn't have something?
We all have something.
I have restless leg syndrome.
Shut up.
The only thing special about you
is you think you're more special
than the rest of us. You're not.
Now get to the back of the line.
You, too, sister.
She used to be married to a Yankee.
Nothing? Okay.
I hope you know
this means you're paying.
I have to sit down. I don't feel well.
(SIGHS)
Nice try. We're not getting a table.
Really, I don't feel well.
Susan, get up. No one's even looking.
Susan?
Susan!
Oh, my God! Someone call 911!
Are you going away?
No.
You are.
- Paul!
- Come on!
Stop! What are you doing?
I want you out. Do you hear me?
Why? What have I done?
I know.
What?
I know who you are.
Paul, please listen to me.
At least Felicia had the guts
to hate me to my face. You hid it.
I don't hate you. I don't.
- Get out, you lying b*tch.
- I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
Okay, yes, I did lie. At first.
And yes, I hated you
because she told me to.
Get out!
But that changed. You changed me.
I don't care what she says anymore.
Please, Paul. Forgive me. Please.
I love you. I swear to God, I love you.
No, you don't.
No one could ever love me.
(GASPS)
Don't forget your g*n.
MARY ALICE:
Leaving is never easy.
But the time comes
when we must move on.
So we can leave our childhood behind.
So we can let go of the past.
So we can be a good parent.
Yes, leaving is never easy.
Especially for those
who have nowhere else to go.
(CRYING)