02x08 - Lights! Camera! Chaos!

[bunniefuu]

[TV JINGLE PLAYING]

Good morning, Monstropolis. I'm Jack.

I'm Jill. And welcome to I Scream...

JACK: You Scream!

Today's top story that
we're screaming about,

public support for Laugh Power

has risen faster than
Jill's credit card debt.

A dubious new MNN poll
shows that support has,

much like Jack's bald spot, grown.

Now polling even with Scream Power,

it appears monsters all
across our great city

are starting to get behind Laugh
Power. I was right all along.

Oh, please, anything
could tip Monsters, Inc.

- Back into the negative and you know it.
- MONSTER: Hey!

Today, we'll take you on an
in-depth look at the company itself.

We'll have live full
access to the facility

and its "leaders", James P.
Sullivan and Mike Wazowski.

Hello, Monstropolis viewers.

Welcome to Monsters, Incorporated.

Hello there, everybody!
It's great to be on TV again!

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

Thanks for the party, guys.

I know I'll be going in
and out of doors all day,

but I promise I will find
time to come down here

and give my MIFT family a daily joke.

And a hug!

What would Monsters, Inc. do

without MIFT supplying them
with their greatest Jokesters?

Well, one of them, at least.

We'll still be working side by side,

even if we're not
technically partners anymore.

Although, you know, I do wonder
who's gonna be my new assistant?

And get your donuts? And
pick you up for work? And...

Yeah, those things, too.

MS. FLINT: Val, don't forget.

Drop by Mr. Crummyham's office

to make it paperwork official.

I love Sneezecake!

Mmm. My wife won't let
me have sugar at home.

Please don't tell her.

- Give me 20 bucks.
- Twenty bucks?

- That's it! I quit!
- What?

I quit trying to solve
this leaky canister issue.

Come on, I'd never throw
away my pension that easy.

Canister issue?

Don't you worry, Ty-Ty.

It's not an issue with your incredibly

well-designed, extra-large canisters.

It's more a delightful misery.

- You mean "mystery?"
- Yeah, that too.

There's been a few canisters
with faulty readings.

Now, they show that they're
full, but they're not.

- Someone is behind this.
- [SNARLS]

Hey, has anyone seen Roger?

ALL: Yeah, where is that guy?

He said he wrote a ballad for me.

He called it The Ancient Rime
of the Jokester in E-minor.

I'll sing you a song, Val.

As you know, I'm a pretty
good songsmith myself.

[CLEARS THROAT]

♪ Val, Val, Val, Val, Val

♪ Oh, Vally, Vally, Val Val,
Val-Val, Val! Val! ♪ [EXCLAIMS]

What... Wait, what's going on?

Val-Val, Val!

[GASPS] Something's
wrong! On Laugh Floor F!

[ALL GASP]

CUTTER: You got to be kidding me!

[ALL EXCLAIM]

Uh, huys? Jack and Jill are
gonna be here any minute!

We gotta clean this
up before they see it.

And air it on live TV.

And then, all of
Monstropolis won't believe

in our ability to power
the city with laughs.

And we'll all be out of a job!

I can't go back to
living with my mother!

Well, I quite enjoy it.

Who could have done this?

Okay, there's no time.

- You get this all cleaned up.
- We're on it.

I'll tell Mike and Sulley, so
they can stall Jack and Jill.

- Missed a spot. Just a little touch-up here.
- [COUGHS]

We hired you for one job, Carter.

Makeup-slash-hair- slash-camera-slash-
sound-slash-assistant.

Now, get it together!

[GROANS]

Yeah. Oh, and we're back

in five, four, three, two...

And we are live. Sulley, what do you
say to all the doubters out there,

like Jill, who are super wrong?

[CHUCKLES] Well, I guess I'd
humbly say, you're forgiven.

No, no, no. There were many doubters.

The voyage to today's
redemption was stormy, my friend.

- As I recall, on the darkest night of my soul,
- [EXCLAIMS]

people mocking Laugh
Power and me, personally.

- Mike.
- But now everybody,

it's time to show your audience

where all the magic
happens. Laugh Floor F.

[STAMMERS] But there,
there's so many things

they'd like to see before that Mike.

What are you talking about?

The little things, like
this shiny floor over here.

Think about how employees
see themselves in this floor.

Sulley, you're embarrassing us.

The last thing you want
to be on TV is embarrassed.

Too late, fools! And we're walking...

Hmm?

Huh?

- Roger?
- Okay. What do you think?

Should we get started over here?

No time. You gotta come with me.

Operation, Catch The Saboteur.

[EXCLAIMS]

Hey!

Hmm.

Tuskmon.

[PANTING] This paint! No,
it's all over my hands!

Uh, we should really head
back and help the others clean.

No, no, we need to find out
what he's up to. Come on.

[SIGHS]

[WHIMPERING]

No!

ROGER: Oh, no. The red... The paint!

Okay, gotta do something.
Gotta do something.

Come on, come on! It won't come off.

[GROANS AND SOBS]

Won't come off!

Oh, no!

We literally caught him red-handed.

Uh, what's wrong with having red hands?

We gotta find out what he's up to.

Always taking pictures,
memorizing blueprints for fun?

And you know, he's never
actually said where he's from.

He's a private guy. I respect that.

What if he is behind the
whole leaky canister thing?

Hey, Mr. Crummyham.

[EXCLAIMS] I'm coming by your office.

I can't wait to sign that paperwork.

These fell out of the machine!
Please don't tell Mrs. Crummyham.

Mmm, mmm-hmm.

- TYLOR: Val, come on!
- Hey! Whoa!

And if you keep looking up, it's
where most of the lightbulbs are.

What? Mr. Sullivan! Mr. Sullivan!

You know that whole canister thing?

Well, I ran the numbers
at the Receiving Station

- and it's worse than we thought.
- [CLEARS THROAT]

- We got a real prob... lem.
- [CLEARS THROAT LOUDLY]

What? Why're you making that face?

Hi, didn't catch all that.

Something about canisters
receiving something? Hmm?

- Care to enlighten us all?
- [GASPS]

[STAMMERS] I... Bye!

JILL: Well, that was rude.

- She's great, right?
- What a weirdo.

[STAMMERS] You know what? This
wall was one of the very first walls

- the wall guys ever, uh, walled.
- What?

Oh, this is incredibly smooth!
Jill, you gotta get in on this.

[SIGHS] Does anyone have a saw?

A saw? No.

But I do have a dream. A
dream to make my own film.

A great film. An award-winning film.

Director Carter Lee's
name on everyone's lips.

JILL: Carter! Stop
mumbling and get over here!

And then I'll see Jack and Jill
at a restaurant and ignore them.

[EXHALES]

He's not here. Can we go now?

"Operation: Whatever This
Is" is a waste of time.

- ROGER: Oh, don't you dare try and deny this.
- BOTH: Huh?

ROGER: Oh, you know
what I'm talking about.

This is the same kind
of stuff you always did.

No! I think they already suspect
me, is that what you want?

I don't believe you!

[DOOR SHUTS]

Who was he yelling at?

Okay, so he's acting a little strange.

A little?

Now, all of the magic
happens on Laugh Floor F.

- You could probably say nothing is more important.
- Uh...

Except the bathroom! Because I gotta go.

- With Mike. We're bathroom buddies.
- Huh?

He's kind of my coach.

But I don't have to go... Ow, hey!

Yes, you do. Excuse us, please.

MIKE: What is wrong with you?

- SULLEY: [SOFTLY] Someone vandalized Laugh Floor F.
- MIKE: [LOUDLY] What?

[TOILET FLUSHES]

You know what? There's no rush to
see Laugh Floor F. No rush at all.

Monsters, Inc. is like a cold pool.

Best to ease yourself in with
itty bitty steps. For example...

The locker room. Here's where
our employees keep their stuff.

SULLEY: Oh. Listen to those
hinges. Do you hear anything?

- No, not a sound. A perfect hinge!
- [HINGE CREAKING]

Ooh, and look at this. A
delicious old locker banana.

Mmm! Mmm.

When's lunch?

Okay, everybody, the
floor is cleaned up.

All we have left is the
graffiti on the walls.

Now scrub like your lives depend
upon it, 'cause they really do.

I just don't understand
who would do this?

Rogie, my boy! Where have you been?
We could use a hand, or all five.

Oh, um...

Yes. Sorry, Uncle Fritz.
I'll happily help scrub.

Attaboy!

After seeing most of the
trivial things at Monsters, Inc.,

we finally head to Laugh Floor F. Huh?

Oh, it's the Adorable Snowman!

Come, you need to get a treat first.

Hey, there. Would you like a snow cone?

- No.
- More than anything. Yes, please!

- Yes, they do.
- Hello, television viewers.

I'm the Adorable Snowman
and these are my snow cones.

Why don't you tell us all about
the fine art of snow cones?

And do not leave out any detail.

Remember, today's storytelling
is about length, not content.

Well, the average snow cone temperature

clocks in at about 18 degrees...

They used some kind of permanent paint

on these walls. It ain't comin' off.

Yeah.

But I have this experimental
solution I cooked up in my bathtub.

Oh, wait. It dissolved my bathtub.

- Hmm...
- [CHUCKLES]

No, we better not.

[STUTTERS, GASPS]

Our only sh*t is to hide it.

Now, what grade do you
want to shave that ice?

That's a controversial question.

I go, personally,

- with "slightly coarse" versus "very fine."
- [BOTH SNORING]

Start stacking the canisters and
the doors to cover the graffiti.

[ALL GRUNTING]

TYLOR: The holding pen
key is still missing.

I bet Roger took it to get access

- to the canisters to mess with them.
- [SIGHS]

Dad said he had keys he wanted to copy.

Oh, I know! Fritz has
personnel files on every MIFTer.

Roger's has gotta be here somewhere.

- Here we go.
- No. This is going too far.

- He is sabotaging Monsters, Inc.
- [BOTH STRAINING]

Okay, let's see what
this guy is really all...

[BOTH GASP]

Surprise! Original Snow
Flavor for you, my good man.

- Gimme, gimme, gimme.
- No, no, no! Oh, brainfreeze!

- Oh, it's good!
- Getting back to our story now,

as leaders of Monsters,
Inc., what do you say

about this anonymous tip I received

about your new Laugh Canisters leaking?

- Anonymous tip?
- New canisters leaking?

New canisters tha... Oh,
yes, yes, the new canisters!

Uh, the only thing that's leaked
is the news on how great they are.

She's a new canister fan.

- Would you look at that?
- See, New Canisters is actually a musical

- that we're putting on for our employees...
- Huh?

... to boost morale, and uh,

Sulley can expand on that
as he is the director.

[LAUGHS AWKWARDLY] I am, I am.

And one of my favorite
parts of the production

is when Mike does the
New Canister dance.

Why don't you show the viewers at home?

- The New Canister dance? Right now?
- Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.

[LAUGHS NERVOUSLY] Okay,
but we're giving away

big stuff for the show, but okay.

Uh, this is like a little teaser then.

It goes a little something like this.

Five, six, seven, eight.

[VOCALIZING SOFTLY]

New Cannisters!

This has tested through
the roof on previews,

you should come to the opening.

Well, would you look at the
time. Time for us to truck on out.

- [LOUD CLATTER]
- Okay, now that is clearly something

my audience needs to see.

[JACK EXCLAIMS]

I should get paid more
if I'm required to run!

We're now entering Laugh Floor F,

where we will finally
discover the secrets

they're hiding at Monsters, Inc.

What? But. But...

We can explain!

How we keep our Laugh Floor
so clean and operational.

But we won't because
it's a trade secret.

And shame on you, Jillian,

for assuming that we would embarrass
ourselves on live television.

Pshaw! [EXCLAIMS]

[CANNISTER SPRAYS]

[STORED LAUGHTER ECHOING]

[ALL GASP]

[STORED LAUGHTER ECHOING]

[BOTH GASP]

JILL: "Bring back scare power?"

It appears even the employees
at Monsters, Inc. agree,

there's something
wrong with Laugh Power.

- It's, it's... It's incomplete. Right?
- [STAMMERS]

Bring back Scare Power...

To remind us of how
great Laugh Power is.

- Right.
- Great, right?

Really? I thought it was
good, old-fashioned vandalism.

- Yeah, by monsters who hate us.
- That's such a strong word.

[LAUGHS AWKWARDLY]

Hey, everyone! I know...
[PANTING] who did it.

[ALL GASP]

It was Henry Waternoose!

- [ALL GASP]
- Oh, no, no, no. Not the one in prison.

The other Henry Waternoose.

His son. Henry Waternoose, the Fourth.

Better known as Roger Rogers.

- [ALL GASP]
- No! Listen, I can explain.

Yeah, he's been pretending
to be someone he's not.

His love for Monsters, Inc. is fake.

He's been working to take down
the company from the inside.

- Wait! No, no! Hey, look, I...
- Oh.

Are we on TV?

[WHISPERING] Tell me you got all that.

[WHISPERING] Yeah, Jill. I don't
just carry this camera around for fun.

No. Listen, look, I can ex...

How is Monstropolis supposed to
rely on Monsters, Inc. for power,

when they don't even
know who works for them?

Anything to say Jack?

Uh, I...

Signing off, I'm Jill, and I've been
proven incredibly right yet again.

Ugh, this is going to be
a huge ratings win for me.

The network is gonna rerun this
disaster all night! So, thank you!

[GROWLS] Everyone! My office! Now!

SULLEY: I can't believe you did that.

Yeah, making us trust you like that?

- I can't believe you, Roger.
- No, I mean you.

Me? But Roger's the guy
who gave us a fake name

and just embarrassed us on live TV.

Mike, Mike. Wait, he's been taking

surveillance pictures of everything.

I... For what?

For me. He made me this.

It makes me love
Monsters, Inc. even more

and it helps me
remember everyone's name,

Tylor.

Listen, I know Roger's
nice and everything,

- but I just showed you the evidence.
- Tylor. Tylor.

Come on, Sulley, you can't be
this bad a judge of character.

[SIGHS]

I knew about Roger when we
hired him. He's a good guy.

But... If that's true,

then who were you yelling
at on the phone earlier?

My dad. You see, I thought he got
someone to vandalize Monsters, Inc.

And they would blame me for it.

He's not his father. And he
deserves a chance to prove it.

Come on, I know he's up to something!

Fritz.

I didn't actually read the file, Ty-Ty.

I believe in trust first,
and ask questions never.

I'm the work dad.

I have to accept my
children as they are.

Even Smitty.

I wanted to be here at Monsters, Inc.

Because I truly believe in what
you're doing with Laugh Power.

Roger believes in our mission,
the one inspired by Boo.

Where's... Where's Boo's
drawing? Where's Boo's drawing?

Ah-ha!

I know who the real saboteur is!

We found this in Tylor's locker.

Sorry, kid.

[ALL GASP]

- What?
- [GASPS]

The sugar packets!
[GASPS] My lucky mitt!

[GASPS] Spray paint
from Tuskmon Hardware!

The key to the holding
pen? Oh, Ty-Ty, no.

What? No! None of this is mine.

I haven't seen any of this, ever.

Ahem.

What! No! Come on! I didn't take that.

You were right, Tylor. Maybe
I am a bad judge of character.

- I...
- Tylor here is an agent of Fear Co...

- No, it isn't true.
- ... and has been sabotaging Monsters Inc. all along.

What? No, I haven't.

I have evidence with Tylor's
name written all over it.

[ALL GASP]

Okay, okay. I did go to Fear Co,

but only to return a Scare Card
after my dinner with Johnny.

You had dinner with Johnny Worthington?

Just once.

Why were you having dinner
with that top-heavy half-wit?

[STAMMERS] He may have...

offered me a job.

- An inside job to sabotage us!
- No, no.

No, as a Scarer. But I said no, okay?

Yeah, look, you can ask Val.

Um, Tylor told me he said no.

And do you believe him?

- Uh...
- Val...

Come on. What'd you... You
know me. We're best friends.

Are we? I've always had your back,

even if you haven't had mine in a while.

What?

VAL: Before everything got crazy,

it was supposed to be my
first day as a Jokester,

but I got dragged into your stuff again.

It's always about you, Tylor.

I just don't know anymore.

Wow, okay, wow, so you're just
gonna turn on me too then, huh?

I'm not, I just don't
know all the answers.

Fine!

Case closed.

[SIGHS]

Congratulations, you're
officially a Jokester!

Now let's celebrate with
some very sugary snacks

that my wife will never know about.

Thanks.

[CLEARS THROAT]

[GROANS, STRETCHES]

Hi, Johnny, sorry to bother
you. You got a phone call.

[SIGHS] Ah.

Who is it? I'm already
late for family game night.

I think you're gonna wanna take it, sir.

Hello? Tylor!

What can I do for you?
Is everything okay?

[MELANCHOLY MUSIC PLAYING]