03x06 - My Dearest Emile

[bunniefuu]

- Previously on "Below Deck"...

- You're quite the talented
chef. Tell me how you started.

- Started working
on cruise ships.

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Cruise ships are
the Walmart,

and yachts are
the Neiman Marcus.

- He's been on 12 yachts
before.

- He worked
on the "Queen Elizabeth 2,"

which isn't actually
a cruise ship.

- In the case of Eddie
and his girlfriend,

it doesn't seem like absence
makes the heart grow fonder.

- Why can't you get
the fáááing slack out of that?

- I don't know.
- [scoffs]

Get it out of the way.
I can't fáááing see. Move it.

I need your head in the game,
and if you don't like it,

I have no issue with getting you
a plane ticket home.

- Ahh.
You're not allowed to stop.

- [laughs]

- There's no way
that I could be jealous.

I want to...

- Hey, buddy, I care about you.
I love you.

- You're lying.

Fááá you.

[horn blares]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- That's really beautiful.

Thank you very much.
Appreciate it, sir.

- I need a drink.
What do you--do you want one?

- Absolut soda cran.

- I'm gonna go talk to Eddie
and the new boy. Let's go.

I'm really confused by Rocky
because one moment, she's on.

The next moment, she's not,
and in the meantime,

I'm starting to have
feelings for her.

Cheers, guys,
on a great charter, good tip.

- Hey, welcome.

- Yeah?
- Dude--

- I feel like
you're family.

- [whispers inaudibly]

- Anybody want to go dance?
- Yeah.

- Come on.
- Can I have money, Eddie?

- Yes? You want money?
- Can I have some money?

Yeah, thanks.
- No. No, no, no.

- sh*ts?

- What do you guys want?

- [laughs]

- Emile must have forgotten
that I'm his superior.

He's lucky
that I'm in a good mood.

- I like you, but--

- Fair enough, brother.

- Come on, give it.
That's it.

- Hey, look.
Oh, look how cute!

Y'all both got two bracelets.
Aww.

- Dude, that's from my sister,
so don't say anything--

- I'm not--
I'm not talking--

- I'm a little bit wary
of Dane.

Something's very strange
about this guy.

- He didn't take it offensive.

- Maybe I'm jealous of your
fáááing bracelets, you know?

- Okay, just leave me alone.

- Let's go get a drink.
- Yeah.

- What the fááá is wrong
with you?

- He's a fáááing awful drunk.

[indistinct chatter]

- Ready to go?
Let's roll.

- Getting out of here, okay?

- I don't want to go.

- You need help with that?
Oh, you got water.

I thought that was
a drink.

- I'm not ready
to go back to the boat.

Whoops,
spilled a drink.

- Rocky? Rocky?

- Don't fall.
Oh, my God!

- Rocky?
- Ugh!

I think Emile is
really, like, confused.

I gave you a golden opportunity,
and you didn't land it.

You didn't land the bird.
I'm not looking for a boy.

If I'm looking for anything
at all, it's gonna be a man,

a real man.

Whoa.
Whoa, whoa, no boys in my room.

- Let's go.

- Ew.
No boys in my room.

- What are you about to do,
brother?

- Make some phone calls,
go to sleep.

- [murmurs]
- Yeah?

- That's what
I probably should do,

but I've been avoiding
all that.

- Anyway, I'm gonna go
call my girlfriends,

and I'm gonna
call it a night.

- Call girlfriends.
I heard it.

- Girlfriend.
- Yeah.

- Let's see it.

- Rocky.

- We're making
a whipped cream party.

Let's go upstairs.

I'm gonna put
a whipped cream bikini on you.

I'm really good at this.
I'm an artist.

- All right.
- Okay.

[laughs]
- Wait, don't.

- Let me see, let me see,
let me see.

- Oh, more.
- Dude, you got some nice teats.

Where'd they come from?

- Connie.
Jeez.

[both laughing]

- I said you were
a carpet ááááááá.

Lesbians all day long.

[both laughing]

Then why would you
keep going back to him?

So, you know...

Amy cheated on me
last charter season.

Not being able to discuss it
face-to-face is tough,

and I know that I've got
a lot of things

I need to deal with
when I get back home,

and I'm really not ready
to deal with it.

My crew needs me.
I need to focus.

Maybe I need to change
the situations that I'm in.

- Off the bow.
- No.

No, no.
No, no, no, babe.

Holy sháá, there's whipped cream
everywhere.

Wait, don't touch a thing,
Connie.

- No, no, no.

- I got
my whipped cream bikini.

I got my buzz on.

I think it's a good night
for Connie.

- Where is everyone?

- The girls are putting cream
on their nipples downstairs.

- Come on, now.

- I love you, Rocky.

[laughter]

- On a scale of one to naked,
how naked are you?

- I really don't care
if my whole crew sees me naked.

The only thing I can think is,
"Ahh, feels so good."

- Connie, come on.
It's cold.

Let's go!

- You're leaving?
- Yeah.

- What the fááá is all this?

What the fááá
happened back here?

What happened?
All the whipped cream.

- Let's just take
into consideration

this was after hours.

- I know, but there's whipped
cream everywhere down there.

This is Connie's, right?

Connie, this is not
your house.

This is not your place
to kind of run amok and trash.

- Yes?

Sháá.

[door closes]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- I was about to ride you.

- Should've jumped on.

- Good morning.
- Morning.

- How are you?

- Good, how are y'all?

- You want a morning hug?

- No.
- Okay.

Last night was a bad night.
Still pissed off about it.

I think I'm running things
a little bit too lax.

I think I'm giving a little bit
too much leeway,

and I need
to tighten it up.

I don't like hugs
in the morning.

- Would you like
some creamer?

- I would love
some creamer.

No, get the fááá
out of here.

- Would you like
some creamer?

- Yes, you have
way too much energy right now.

[Rocky laughs]

- Emile?
- Yeah, Connie.

- What time did you go to bed
last night?

- I went to bed
as soon as we got back.

- Really?
- Yeah.

- Why?

- I was really tired.

After last night's
unpleasurable experience,

I feel defeated
and deflated.

- Rocky decides
she's gonna straight-up mix

a whole thing of whipped cream
and makes it into bikinis.

- You girls were naked?

- Yes, correct.

- Fááá, and I wasn't there?

- No.

I can't believe you went
to bed before that.

- I'm so bummed.

- Kate, Leon, Eddie,

I need you guys
up in the wheelhouse.

- Copy, Captain.

- Hello, hello, aloha.

- Our next charter.
Four girls, a mom, and a guy.

We have two primaries,
Bryn and Stacey.

Sorority sisters.
Ought to be fun.

- I was never
in a sorority.

I never had to buy
my friends, but--

both: Ooh.

- It's only funny
if it's true.

- "Stacey and Bryn
have been best friends

"since they were
Theta sorority sisters at FSU.

"Now that they're wives
and mothers,

"they love taking any chance
they can to kick back in luxury

without kids or husbands
to worry about."

- Wow.
- I feel great about this.

- Eddie, yacht toys.
Get 'em all out.

- Got it.

- Bryn doesn't like
any spicy foods.

Bryn's mom doesn't like
radishes or avocados.

- Can find out whether
they're going for lunch?

'Cause I don't want
to be--

- Imagine we'll have to wait
for them to get here to ask 'em.

- Yeah, but if we can
ask that question--

- Sure.

- I haven't got time to fááá
around with games with Kate.

She seems to go around
whispering little things

in people's ears
and this and that.

Me, I'm coming
straight to you.

I ain't messing around.

- Great.
- All right, sounds good.

- Thanks, guys.

- Hi.
- So--

- Have any of the sheets
been done?

- We haven't made the beds,
and we were gonna do a race.

- I don't want to do
a stew race.

- Obviously, you didn't drink
as much as we did last night.

- Details are a little hazy
to me, to be honest.

- Yeah.

I have to, like,
nip it in the bud.

- I do feel really bad
for Emile

'cause she's clearly
just leading him on.

- Did y'all make out
last night, though?

- No.
I will not make out with Emile.

Like, I think
he's funny,

I think he's cute,
but he's young,

and I'm not into him.

[laughter]

If you're gonna pet me,
then pet me.

If you're gonna rub, rub.

You are so close to just
hitting a ball out of the park,

and all you got to do
is look at the ball.

- I asked Captain Lee if we
could go out for dinner tonight.

- I would love to go
on a date,

and you, like,
are telepathic.

- Synchronized.

- Oh, Emile,
let me get in here.

Oh, Emile.

- I'm not sure if Rocky
is just a tease

or if there's
something else there.

- Oh, give me--
oh, just rub my neck.

Ohh.

- Don't get me horny.
- [laughs]

- Good first step, just don't
flirt with him as much.

- When I'm into somebody,
I'm into somebody,

but he's not getting it.

If I really liked you, man,
I'd already have you.

It'd be done.
It'd be a done deal.

You guys
are absolutely right.

I need to draw the line
because I could see

where it could get blurry,
and it's my fault.

And I don't want to hurt
his feelings.

- Why don't you just tell him
you have a boyfriend?

- I don't even think
that would stop him.

I think I have to go
one step further and tell him,

like, I'm into chicks, and,
like, Connie's on the radar.

- I think that would
probably encourage him.

- Really?

- I know what you should do.

You should bang...Dane.

- No.
- He'll--Leon.

Plan B,
buy Emile a hooker.

- There's hookers here?

- I'm sure
we can find one.

So are you feeling good
about it?

- Yeah.
- Is there any chance Rocky

could get a little time
in the galley with you?

Because she's not
a stewardess really,

and I feel bad
always correcting her.

Putting Rocky in the galley
with Leon is perfect.

She thinks it's a reward,
he thinks he's getting help,

and I get both of them
out of my hair.

- Okay. No problem.
No problem. Okay.

- Yeah?

- I think it'll keep her
happy as well.

Rocky and I,
we've got a lot in common.

She wants to become a chef.
I am a chef.

She doesn't like Kate.
I don't like Kate.

We've got a little bit more
in common

than everybody else,
I think, on the boat.

- Cool,
thank you so much.

- Attention, all crew,
I need everybody on deck

in their whites in ten.

It's show time.

- Kate, are you good
on your white shirt?

- Yes, I am.
Thank you very much.

- Whatever.

- Whoo!

- What up, Eddie?

- What up?

- Please smile.

- No fáááing time
to smile.

- Bryn, are you serious
right now?

- Line up.
Let's go.

I don't know why you--
like, you got blinders on.

Pack your sháá, and we'll
get you a boat out of here.

This boat is gigantic.

- How are you?
- Hi.

- Come on aboard.
Captain Lee.

- Hi, Captain Lee.

- Nice to meet you.
- Hi there. Bryn.

- Bryn, how are ya?
- Nice to meet you.

- My pleasure.

- Hi. Stacey.

- Stacey, how are you?
- Good to meet you.

- Hi, Stacey.
What was your name?

- Dane.
- Dane, mm.

- Emile. Pleasure to meet you.
- Hi.

You too.
Ooh!

- Welcome aboard "Eros."

Kate is gonna show you
to your quarters

and give you a tour
of the boat,

so if you guys are ready, we
need to get this party started.

- We're ready!
all: Cheers.

- I love the fact
that they're having

a girls' weekend on a yacht,
getting away

and having a good time
just with the girls,

and Jacob, of course.

- Right this way, guys.

So this is the main salon.
- Oh, my God.

- Okay.

- And we have
a formal dining room.

- This is what it's about
right here.

- And then this is
your sky lounge.

- Cocktails after dinner?

- Yes, before and after dinner.
Okay.

- This is actually quite
a magnificent master stateroom

for a yacht.

- Hello!

[laughter]

- So if you guys just let us
know who's rooming where,

we'll get your luggage
down here.

- You need your own room.
- I do?

- No one wants to listen
to you snore.

- I don't snore.
- Yes, you do.

- Nothing against
sorority girls,

but these charter guests
will be really easy

'cause I have a feeling,
whatever they do,

they'll do it all together
at the same time.

You guys don't have
to decide right now.

We can go--
- We decided right now.

- Okay. All right.
Would you like more champagne?

- We decided right now.
- Okay.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- All right, you guys ready?
We're gonna go bow to stern.

- Copy that.
- Let's do it.

[indistinct radio chatter]

- Stern is 15 feet off
and increasing gradually.

- Sure.
I can do these.

- You can do these?
- Yeah.

- All right.

- I worked
on some big cargo ship boats,

so working on a deck
of a mega yacht

is a new experience for me.

I definitely feel the pressure
of being the new guy,

and I want to do right
by the whole crew.

- All right, she's clear.
We're good.

♪ ♪

- So they both need to be
a little topped off.

- Emile, will you top 'em off
with him?

- Sorry?

- Will you top off
the Jet Skis with him?

- Whoa, just
give me a sec.

- No, no, you're good.
Yeah.

- Yes, we are in a real hurry.
- Oh, we--okay.

- These guys need to be
more self-reliant.

I got more on my mind
than topping off a Jet Ski.

Just go do it, now.

- I used to have a chef
that I think

used to sharpen his knives
just to intimidate the crew.

- And did he?

- Well, he was bat-sháá crazy,
so yeah,

when he was sharpening knives,
I got a little nervous.

Are you gonna do
grilled fruit again?

- Yeah, probably.

- What else
were you thinking?

- I'll give 'em short ribs
for lunch and fish.

They've got mac.
They've got zucchini.

They've got a lot of stuff
today.

- I love it.

- Drop it now.

- Dropping.

Anchor's on the bottom.
- Lock it in.

- She's locked.

- Coming down.

- Who's ready to jump
on a Jet Ski?

- No.
- Ah!

- Motherfáááer!
- [laughs]

- Have you driven
one of these before?

- Yes.
- All right.

- Bye, Felicia.

- She didn't even give me
a chance to finish talking.

I was explaining it to her,
and all of a sudden,

she just hits it.

- Look at her. She looks like
a little Bond girl.

- You got your gas
right here.

- Okay.
- Your reverse.

- Okay.

- Okay.

- All right.
- Is this it?

- Yeah, I'm good.
You can whip it.

- This is
so fáááing embarrassing.

- Come back around.
You got to drop me off.

I got a lot of equipment on.

- You can turn it off now.

- So I was thinking
for lunch--

- Yeah, snacks, okay.
Party, I love it.

This should be fun.

We all know
how much Leon likes change.

I just talked
to the primary.

They want lunch to just be
kind of, like,

party finger foods.

Maybe quesadillas would be
easy for you.

- No quesadilla breads.

- Oh, tortillas?

Okay, so what do you
want us to do

that we can do real quick?
We can probably--

- Well, nothing's gonna be
real quick,

'cause lunch is real quick.

I've created all this food
for lunch,

and now youse are telling me
youse don't want lunch.

You just want
some sort of finger food.

- Well, I'm just tell--
I'm just communicating

to you what the primary--

- Yeah, but we need to
communicate a little bit better

then, don't we?
Let's be realistic.

We need to ask 'em
in the morning,

so then we can start prepping
for it,

'cause I can't pull things
out my ass.

You know what I mean?
I'm good, but I'm not that good.

- I'm not sure they really knew
what they wanted to do

until now,
'cause we've--

- Well, finger food,
they could do short ribs.

That's finger food.
- Sounds good.

- I can do small Caesar salads,
macaroni.

- Do you want to do the macaroni
in maybe little ramekins?

- Yeah, that can be
put in ramekins.

- Okay.
- So no fish.

- Could you do it on skewers
or something,

like shish kebabs?

- No. I'm gonna give 'em
what I've got here.

That's it.
Thank you.

- We just found out.

- I'm not keeping
any information from you, Leon.

- Well, you can just
communicate with them

and say, "Would you like
any suggestions for lunch?"

- I generally try not to boss
the guests around.

Leon cannot handle anything

outside of his very narrow
paradigm of opinion.

- I'm not a good chef,
though, am I?

I'm not a charter chef.

That's what you said

to my little
South African friend.

- He's been
on 12 yachts before.

- He worked
on the "Queen Elizabeth 2,"

which is not actually
a yacht.

It's actually
a very small cruise ship.

- What is a charter chef?

- Tell me.
I'd like to know.

- Wow. Is it?

I think you should just worry
about talking

to your guests, yeah?

Or I'll step in
and start talking to them.

- I think we need to work
on our communication, Leon.

- Okeydoke, I'm listening to you
but not at the moment.

I'm a little bit busy,
Kate, yeah?

Catch me on the fly.

- We could start--I'm gonna
start wiping stuff down,

cleaning up this deck.
- Yeah, that sounds good.

- All right.
- We can wipe down.

- We've got
some macaroni and cheese

pre-portioned coming up,
a little short ribs.

- Short ribs.
- Sound good?

- Yeah, sounds great.
- Okay.

- All right, watch yourself.
- Okay, cool.

Check this end.

- Good.

- Um, guys?

- Oh, fááá.

- The Jet Ski's
floating away.

- I'll get in quickly.

I've had enough of this
for one day.

When my crew screws up,
I'm the one in charge of them,

and so the mistakes they made

are a direct reflection
on my leadership.

- Would you like
some short ribs?

- Oh, my God.

- Oh, hey! Ho!
Jacob!

- What?
- Oh, hey!

- Hello.
- Hey, girl, hey.

- God damn it, Emile.
Give me the line.

- Wow.

- Show me
what you're working with.

- Can I get on the back
of the Jet Ski?

- I like how you can
cat-call and eat

macaroni and cheese
at the same time.

- Oh, my God.

- Out there just making
stupid, stupid mistakes,

and I have a really low level
of tolerance for stupid.

- Work.

- Emile, get the fááá off
the Jet Ski.

Let's go.
- Work.

- Mmm.

- So who tied that on?

- Do you not know how
to tie a cleat anymore?

- I do.
- All right then.

Then what the fááá happened?

- I need Eddie, Emile,
and Dane to the bridge.

- Copy that.

Did he call you up there?

He didn't?
- Nope.

- Ha-ha, ha-ha.
Oh, fááá.

What's going on?

- I'm trying to be patient.

I don't know what
you guys are doing

or what you think
you're doing,

but I know one thing
that you're not doing

is you're not listening.

I don't know why you--
like, you got blinders on.

If you don't want to listen,
pack your sháá,

and we'll get you
a boat out of here.

That simple.

But it fáááing stops
here and now.

- [sighs]

- We're done.

- Yes, sir.

- Yeah.
- Okay?

- The guests have requested
some mini cheeseburger sliders.

- No.
That's bullsháá.

- I need another beer.

- We've got some rum punch
made up.

You want some or a sh*t?
- Maybe have those handy.

- Okay.

- So I'm tired
of getting yelled at.

We need to have
more attention to detail.

There's a right way and
a wrong way to do everything.

We need to know the right way
to do it all the time.

We need to listen
to directions.

I don't care
if you think you know--

- It's not really efficient
to have three people

cleaning one spot.

- Dane was there with you
because he's never done

those type of things before
and I want him to learn.

There should be
one person talking

when we're all working
together.

That person is me,

because I'm not gonna get
fáááing fired.

Okay, 'cause one of you
will get fired first by me.

- So I understand that Eddie's
taking the brunt of it all,

and I do feel bad for that.

If I fááá up and Eddie
gets in trouble for it,

yes, you're my boss.
I'm sorry.

At the same time,
I don't know what Eddie's doing

when people are fáááing up.

I mean,
do I think he's MIA a lot?

I think Eddie's MIA a ton.

- We're not gonna work together
as a good team,

and things are still gonna be
kind of loose and wishy-washy,

someone's gonna go.

- You go again.

all: Oh!
- Sinker!

- Now chug it,
'cause I did it.

- How's everybody doing?

- I couldn't bug you
for just a cup of ice, could I?

- Ice for that drink?
Do you want me to just put ice--

- Can I do both?
- Yeah.

- Sorority reunion!

Like, these girls are
low maintenance,

living their glory days,
and they are loving it.

- Listen, I'm playing
the winner.

[laughter]

- Did Leon go down
for a break?

- Leon and Kate are both
taking a little break,

which I think is great
for both of them.

Maybe they can, like, have
a little cool-down session.

He just, like,
holds in a lot of things

and then, like, at some point,
just kind of says it all.

- I think he just needs
to be willing

to go with the flow more.

- I do think he gets
a plan set in his mind,

and when anything's changed,

whether it be time
or how they want it served,

it throws him off a little bit.
- Yeah.

- Thing is, is like,
with yachting,

the only constant thing
is that everything changes.

If Kate and Leon
keep clashing like this,

it's gonna be a disaster.

- I think this boat is
getting to everyone.

- Yeah.

- Hi.
What time's dinner?

- I don't know.

- Where's Leon?

- He's taking a breather.

Rocky's cooking
crew dinner tonight.

- What?
Are you really?

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

- Hmm.

- Kate comes to me,
and she's like,

"Hey, I want you to cook
crew meal tonight."

♪ I don't have to laundry ♪
I can have fun.

♪ I get to cook tonight,
I get to cook tonight ♪

- You guys want to eat
at 6:00?

- 6:00?

- Yeah, I'm excited
to try your cooking.

- I know you probably know
a lot about cooking,

but I'm letting you know,

presentation is everything,
okay?

Let me know when it's prepared
with a nice glass of cab, okay?

- Yeah.
The pressure's on.

- 6:00.
I'm a stickler about time.

- Eddie...

- Rocky is a crazy woman,

but she's great
to joke around with,

and with all the things
that have been going wrong,

one thing I could really use
right now

is a little bit of light,
happy conversation.

I get what I want.

[grunts]

Get out of here!
Make my dinner, woman!

- Okay, and go when the jets
take you. Ready?

- Okay, turn 'em on.
- Ride the ride.

[laughter]
- Oh!

- Oh!

- You've got to sit on it.
Sit on it.

- [laughs]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Where is everything?

Where's the spatula?

I don't know
where anything is.

I don't really have a plan
for crew dinner.

Maybe I'll make a ginger
carrot coconut cream soup,

hit it with a beautiful salad,
some nice colors.

I want to make, like,
a hot pink cabbage puree

and have, like,
a side of roasted veggies

but, like,
cut a certain way.

There's so many things
I want to do.

- How's it going?
- Good.

Do you know where more onions
would be?

- If you go down the crew mess,
I think there's some there.

- Thanks, babe.

♪ ♪

- What are you making?

- I'm making a salad,
some chicken, and some...stuff.

I'm just stoked 'cause I get
to cook for the crew finally.

Like, that's why
I got into yachting,

and I like sharing my art
with everybody.

[dishes clattering]

- Yeah.

♪ ♪

- Connie?
- Yes, Emile?

- Have we had crew dinner
or something?

- No.

- We just have leftovers.

- How's dinner going,
Chef?

- It'll be ready
around 6:20.

- What happened to 6:00?

- You know, stuff happens
on a yacht.

I have to get dressed.

- Rocky?

- You know what, I forgot
to put on a black dress.

- So I'm thinking around 8:00
for dinner.

- Too easy.
Not a problem.

I'm not gonna play these
little mind games with Kate,

where she thinks
she's bigger and better than me,

'cause she's far from it.

- Great.

- Wait, pause.
What?

You do not shampoo your hair
ever, ever, ever, ever?

- I don't shampoo my hair
at home, no.

- She hasn't done her hair
in probably, like, seven years.

- So other people wash it?

- Yes.
- Yes.

- Okay.
All right, okay.

Okay, so we figured that,
okay.

[quirky music]

♪ ♪

- The table's set, so we'll
head up to the next step.

- I'm gonna be warm.

Oh, isn't this pretty?

- Oh, look how nice it is.

- Time for dinner.

- So excited, Rocky.

- Well, it's gonna be
a little longer,

'cause they're not done yet.

- No, there's
some leftover pork salad.

That's what I had now.

- Soon as the sorbet's done,
you can go, ladies.

- Okay.
- Thank you.

- I love the presentation.

- I will do things that
I wouldn't do to my husband.

- Just so y'all know,
this is

a berry gazpacho
over mango, melon, and edamame.

- Oh, here we go, Cindy.
You're all over this.

Cindy loves
freaking gazpacho.

- Gazpacho is bullsháá.

It's just a fancy name
for laziness.

"I put the leftovers from lunch
in the Vitamix"...

- [laughs]
Shut up.

- "Pressed a button."

These guests are on a yacht
with wonderful service

and a beautiful setting.

Of course it's gonna
taste good enough.

I was like, "You know what?
Heat?

Nah.
Let's call it gazpacho."

- [grunts]

Do you like avocado?

- You're just gonna
eat it now?

- Ooh, look at that avocado.

- Do you want the other half
of that, Dane?

- Mm...

- But you asked me.

- I think I just want
a cookie.

- This fáááing chicken.

I should've put it in
way earlier.

- Are these ready to go now?

- Yeah, as soon as the sauce
is on it.

- Great, thank you.

So just so y'all know,
this is roast chicken

with carrots, diced potatoes,
and asparagus.

- Nummy, nummy.
Thanks.

- Why is crew dinner late?

- Because Rocky's
making it.

- Oh.

- Here it is.
Come get it.

- Look at you.
I'm about to grub down.

- Actually really looks good.

- Is it good?

- Needs a little more seasoning,
but it's good.

After a day like today,
I just want some sustenance.

I want something
to fill my belly

that's gonna make me feel good
and keep me going.

Does that look raw to you?

- The-the chicken...
- Mmm.

- Should be cooked to--

- Dude, this is raw.

Fááá.

- I am so full.

- How the fááá
are you full?

Like, I could eat
a whole nother platter.

- Listen, hot tub,
and then burgers.

Stacey, what did you want?
Double fudge brownie?

- I like cream cheese brownies.

- We're gonna have
sliders with that.

- Basically, he wants
what a pot smoker would want.

[laughter]

Brownies and fries.

- That sounds delicious.

- It does sound
like a pot smoker.

It totally does.
[laughter]

- Okay, well,
I'm gonna pass this on,

and then I'll be back.

- Thank you.

- So the guests have requested
chocolate cream cheese brownies

to enjoy in the hot tub and also
some cheeseburger sliders.

- Great.
- So--

- I'll take those down.

Leon is a very...
regimented individual.

Even though the guests
requested this,

I know he's not gonna like it,
but I don't care.

Hey, Leon.
- Oui?

- The guests have requested
some mini cheeseburger sliders.

- No.
- I'm sorry, what?

- Oh, can you turn it back on?

And then also
some cream cheese brownies.

- Cream cheese brownies.
- Yeah.

- Fááá, I've just
fed youse guys,

and now you want this?

I have met so many guests
in my life.

It'd be nice to not find
a crazy one.

That's bullsháá.

- We are going to the dock.

- How we looking
on getting all the fenders out?

Fáááing sick.

I really need my deck crew
to perform on this.

- Got a couple of things
I'd like to bring up.

- Whatever.

- Just so we can calibrate
the radar.

Kate's gonna hook you
with a reflector. Go there.

Kate, I'm sending Dane to you
to get the reflector.

- If you have somebody
that's really green

and new to yachting,
sometimes it's fun

to blatantly take advantage
of their ignorance.

All right,
I'm gonna activate the radar.

Give me one hand at 9:00
and one at 3:00, please.

Okay, give me one hand
at midnight

and one at 9:00.

Give me one at 6:00.



That's 20 to 7:00.
Move it over to your left.

- There you go.
- There you go, there you go.

- This is pretty ridiculous,

but, um, you know,
Captain's orders.

- All right,
I gotta have a little motion.

Yeah, that's it.

I think we almost got it.
Squat down a little.

[laughter]
- Oh, yes.

- Hold that right there.

- The guests have requested
some mini cheeseburger sliders.

- No.

- I'm sorry, what?

- Oh, can you turn it back on?

- You have no ground beef?

- No. Steak.

- Steak sliders would be nice

and also
some cream cheese brownies.

- Cream cheese brownies?

- Yeah.

- That's bullsháá.

The guests want sliders, and
I didn't have any mincemeat.

These are not things
Kate thinks about.

She just comes down
and reels everything off

and thinking that I can just
pull stuff out my ass.

It's not as easy as that.
You know what I mean?

When do they want 'em?
Right now?

- Yes. Well, they're gonna go
jump in the Jacuzzi.

- That's not gonna happen. I've
gotta make the brownie mix and--

Be about half an hour.
- Okay. Oh, that's--

yeah, they don't want it
right now.

- Quit sipping
on that weak sauce.

- I'm getting my suit on.
Jacob's with me.

- I'll meet you there.
I'm finishing my wine.

- Oh, Smokey Robinson.

- Those are gonna be the buns?
That's a great idea.

- Eye--what?
- Filet of beef.

- Oh, okay.

- Well, I thought
Kate was joking

to see what type of reaction
I was gonna get,

but I'm not gonna
give her the joy.

End of the day,
you're there for the guests,

and that's
what it boils down to.

- Thank you.

- Literally, I could
sleep right here.

- [laughs]

- Oh, my--
- Sliders!

- They're actually
filet sliders.

- Whoo!

- Chef Leon made them.

- Do you want to take
those cream cheese things up?

- Yum, cream cheese
chocolate brownies.

- Oh, sháá!

- Oh, my God,
that's so good.

- Did you have
one of these brownies?

It's like an expl*si*n
in your mouth.

- They're really happy
with the sliders and fries.

- Right.

- This type of request
is so typical.

The fact that Leon
is reacting this way

makes me wonder, like,
maybe yachting's not for you.

- I'm gonna go downstairs
and have a drink.

Sháá.

- What are
these little floating lights?

[laughter]
- Here we go.

- Sweet baby Jesus.

all: Oh!
[laughter]

- Bubbles!

- Here you go, dear.

- Don't you wish
you were us, Cindy?

- No.

- Protect the eyelashes!

- They are all inebriated
and out of control.

- I totally get it.

These ladies,
they've got husbands at home.

They've got kids at home.

They left that all behind
and flew to a yacht

to have a good time.

- The snorkeling's fantastic!

[laughter]

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Kate?
- Yeah?

- It's like when they're
laying down, they look awesome,

and then when you hold 'em
up to the light,

they don't,
and it's annoying.

- I know, I know, I know.
- So--

- Just use lots of steam
and lots of starch.

- ♪ Lots of steam,
lots of starch ♪

♪ More steam ♪

♪ More starch ♪

♪ The iron ♪

♪ Oh, God! ♪

♪ Just ironing
the captain's shorts ♪

[laughs]

♪ More steam ♪

♪ More starch ♪

♪ Just ironing
the captain's shorts ♪

♪ More steam, more starch ♪

♪ I'm ironing
the captain's shorts ♪

♪ Oh, God ♪

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Hi. Good morning.

- Good morning.

- Do you think it's possible--
Stacey's not feeling so good.

- Oh, okay.

- Have any ginger ale?

- Yeah, I'll bring one
right to her room.

- [retching]

- Stacey, honey,
how are you feeling?

[laughs]

Ginger ale is waiting for you.

When you're hungover,
you got to drink fluids.

You got to have some sugar.
You want to be held.

When you're hungover, like,
when I'm hungover all day,

I just want to be,
like, held.

Like, "Hold me.
I'm hurting."

[laughter]

- I can start bringing
some fresh fruit upstairs

and get you guys started
on breakfast or drinks.

- Oh, yeah.
- Okay.

I'll start bringing some stuff
up there.

She's ready to go home
to her husband.

She just wants to be loved.

- [retching]

- That's why
I don't drink like that.

- All right, Lee.
[speaks indistinctly]

- Let's do this.

- Chain leading out to 1:00
under the bow.

- Chain is leading out to 1:00
under the bow.

- Rust to starboard.
- Rust to starboard.

- We're at 4:00.
Full stop, come back.

You're good to go.
- Roger that.

We're outta here.

- Okay, I'm gonna carry
a couple platters up.

[laughter]

- Bacon and sausages.
- Ooh.

I got a little pork trio.
- [retches]

- Oh, this Yacky McYack.

- We're voting who has to sit
next to Stacey.

[laughter]
- That's not nice.

- So the captain just told me
that if y'all would be

more comfortable at the dock,
we can go ahead and head in.

It's really up to you.

- Oh, we should just go
to the dock.

I'm making
an executive decision.

- Yeah, I think it's good.
- Queen Red, I love it.

- Is that okay with you, Stace?

- Okay.

- I don't know.
Are you mad?

- No, I'm not mad.

- You okay?
- Yeah.

- Yeah.
- Yeah?

- Yeah.
- Okay, thank you.

- Thanks.

- Attention, all crew,
attention, all crew,

I have some news for ya.

We are going to the dock.
Let's get cracking.

- Fááá.

- Copy that, Lee.

I really need my deck crew
to perform on this.

Otherwise, Captain might
blow a gasket.

- I'll bring
the other one out.

- 300 yards.

- How we looking on getting
all the fenders out?

- We're good.

- You got all the lines
up there? Are you ready?

- Good.

- We got all the deck crew
in position, Eddie?

- Got all deck crew
in position.

You got 60 feet
starboard midship to the sign.



Mark there.
Mark there.

- Yeah, Lee, that's perfect.

- Love it.

- Little tight.
- [grunts]

- About as tight
as it's getting.

[indistinct radio chatter]

- Okay.

- All good?
- All good.

Attention, all crew,
I need your presence

on the aft deck
in your whites.

[upbeat music]

- Hi, guys.

Thank you so much.

[overlapping chatter]

- It was so fun
having y'all on board.

- I'm sad to see them leave.

I wish I could send
some of my crew members

on a plane back to Florida
instead of these guests.

- Captain Lee, couldn't have
asked for a better trip.

That was fantastic.
Yeah.

Thank you for everything,
and, um, yeah,

hopefully, we'll see you guys
someday soon.

- Well, thank you so much.

- Thank you.
all: Bye.

- All right, bye, everybody.
Mwah.

- Bye.
- Thank you.

- Good-bye,
beautiful boat.

- Yeah, I'm gonna go change.

- Me too.

- This should not have been
a hard day.

- So what made it hard?

- People weren't using
their brain.

Everything just--
They've totally got

their heads in their ass,
all the way up 'em.

- You get those days.

They're there to test you
more than anything else.

- Is everything else
going okay down here?

- You tell me, bro.

- Kate, you know, Kate likes
to poke and prod, and--

- She does.
She does.

- Boop, boop, boop, boop.
- But you know what?

You respect me,
and I respect you

all the way, all day long.

You communicate with me,
and I'll communicate

with you all day long.

Don't even think about putting
your hands in there.


and it's all yours.


in there, though, yeah?

- Oh, yeah.
- Short ribs, that's for you.

- Yesterday,
chicken was raw.

- Some of it was raw.
- Some of it was.

- It took a little long.
- Two hours.

- I had to eat leftovers
and then--

- But again, she hasn't been
in the kitchen for a while, so--

- Oh, yeah.
- Her timing's off.

- I'm not gonna
mention this to Rocky

so that hopefully I will be
able to sleep through the night

and not wake up
getting stabbed repeatedly.

'Cause she would!
She'd fáááing k*ll you!

She would--she would fáááing
k*ll you if you were like,

"Hey, Rock, your cooking sucked,
by the way,"

she'd be like--
[giggles and growls]

- Hopefully next week,
she can help me

a little bit
on the desserts.

- Yeah.

- Attention, all crew,
attention, all crew.

Get into your work clothes.

Convene in the crew mess
in ten.

[indistinct chatter]

How we doing?

So...



- Wow.

- 15 grand for the charter
is not bad,

considering the fact
that my crew

is not performing
to the standards that I have.

- Comes out to $1,363
per person.

Rocky.

Chef.
Connie.

There you are, Emile.
- Thank you, Captain.

- Thank you, Kate.

Got a couple of things
I'd like to bring up.

Exterior crew,
on the docking today,

you had your head in the game
and not up your ass,

and it went off
without a hitch,

so let's see if we can't
get things accomplished

and they're done properly.
Okay?

Interior,
I do sense a breakdown

in communication between
the interior and the galley.

All I'm gonna say is,
I just want it dealt with.

I don't care how
it gets dealt with.

I just want it
to go away.

We've got charter guests
tomorrow,

so I want to flip
the boat tonight.

I want to get it done.
Any questions?

Get to work.
- Thank you.

- Yes, sir.

- I don't want to be here
any longer than I have to.

- No, dude. No, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no!

I'm gonna write him
a huge letter.

- Oh, my God.
No.

♪ ♪

- Where are we gonna put
all this crap?

- No, don't worry.

I'm helping you
out of my pure kindness,

and I'm giving you
a piece of me.

[laughs]

- [laughs]
Go. Go now.

- Really?
- Yes, go.

Like, stop!
You're--you're just--stop.

Just, like,
enjoy our company,

know that we're coworkers.

It's like, coworkers,
coworkers, coworkers.

- I disagree with that,
and we can talk later.

- No, I am telling you
that's exactly what I want.

- Maybe Rocky likes
to play hard to get.

I'm just genuinely not--
not fazed.

- [mock sobs]

I don't want to be here
any longer than I have to.

- Are you done?

No, dude. No, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no!

Dude, it's getting to that point
where I'm gonna lose it.

- Where is he?

- I don't even care.
I'm about to lose it right now.

I'm gonna write him a--I'm gonna
write him a huge letter.

I am. I'm over it.

- [Southern accent]
My dearest Emile,

the days are passing slowly
without you by my side.

- Stop it.
This is serious.

- "I-I long
for your sweet caress

and to gaze into
the endless love of your eyes."

- Oh, my God.

No.

- [reading indistinctly]
- Oh, my God.

- I don't know how to get
any more clear than that.

I've been single
for the past 3 1/2 years,

and I want to put 100%
into me right now.

And I'm not gonna put


unless they're bringing
something to the table.

- Still to come this season
on "Below Deck"...

- Are we cool?
- Talk later.

Like, what I want
to fáááing say.

- Say it.

- Doesn't matter.

- All right, Connie, you got--

- That's a good old squall line
coming through there.

- It's coming,
and hail's coming with it.

- Hold steady!

- Kate?

- Yes, Leon?

- Do you like me?

I don't like you one bit.
Okay?

- I hear you.

- I do not like you one bit.

Do you want to cook?
Would you like to cook?

Are you any good at cooking?
- I told you--

- Then don't come out
with that bullsháá to me.

- I don't like the way
you're speaking to me.

- Hello, love.

- Well, it took you long enough.
- I know.

- You come to save us?

- I don't know
what I'm here for.

- Beautiful.

- Chef Leon's got
fááá all on that.

- Do you mind if I butter
your banana?

- You can butter my banana.

- I'm just gonna do
a loose job.

- Rocky home wrecker.
Home wrecker Rocky.

- Rocky's talking like
they've been hooking up.

- You're spreading
these rumors about me.

You're saying that something
happened between us?

You're really fáááing
with me here.

I made a huge mistake.
Huge.

- I'd kind of like
somebody to tell me

what the fááá is going on
with this boat.

My worst nightmare,
this thing's gonna bubble over.

God damn it!
- You got your fááá--

- Get your finger
out of my face.

Back off.

[alarm blaring]
- It's a fire. That's a fire.

- Where?
- It's in there.

- Oh, my eyes!

- Oh, fááá.

- You're just gonna
walk away?

Rocky.
Yeah, she's jumping.

- Attention, all crew,
prepare your seatbelts

because we are right
in the middle of a sháá storm.

- It fáááing stops
here and now.

There's your ticket.
Get the fááá off.