- This is me, eliza thornberry,
Part of your average family.
I got a dad, a mom, and a sister.
There is donnie-- we found him.
And darwin--he found us.
Oh, yeah, about our house--it moves,
'Cause we travel all over the world.
You see, my dad hosts this nature show,
And my mom sh**t it.
Okay, so we're not that average.
And between you and me, something amazing happened,
And now I can talk to animals.
It's really cool, but totally secret.
And you know what? Life's never been the same.
- Ah!
Ah!
- All right.
Send a high one out here.
- You might want to back up, my boy.
I'm liable to hit it over your head.
- No offense, uncle nige,
But you don't look like major league material.
- I'll have you know I was the top batsman
Of my fourth form cricket team at harrow.
Why, when we played eaton--
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever.
Just bring it on.
- [Grunts]
[Grunts]
- Oh.
- Oh, seems like I need a bit of a warm-up.
[Grunts]
- Hey, can we play?
- Oh, sure you can.
Just not very well. [Laughs]
- Ugh.
- Right.
Would you take over, poppet?
I believe your mother needs my help
With the camera equipment.
- Oh!
- So you sure you want to embarrass yourself?
- Ty, where did you get the idea that you are so amazing?
- It's my planet, cuz.
You only get to stay here 'cause I let you.
- Just pitch.
- All right, get ready, 'cause I'm gonna throw you
A heater right across the plate.
- I'm growing old out here.
- [Grunts]
[Both scream]
- What are you trying to do? Knock my head off?
- [Laughs]
Hey, you were crowding the plate.
What's the matter? You chicken?
[Grunts]
Oh.
- [Laughs]
- [Chattering]
- I don't see anything. Do you, dear?
- No. It's probably nothing.
- [Chattering]
- What's going on?
- Nature boy is at it again.
- Nothing.
Oh, wait.
It's a tribe of masai.
- [Chattering]
- There's something about that boy.
- African warriors.
Awesome.
- Give me. - Hey.
- Mom, dad, it's juka and makai.
- You know them?
- It's my planet, cuz.
[Cows mooing]
- [Giggling]
- Hi, juka.
- Hi, eliza.
- Oh, cool spear.
Can I throw it?
- This is my annoying cousin, tyler.
- Are you a real masai warrior?
- Of course he's a warrior. Right, juka?
- A warrior?
Oh, sure. Yes.
Um, I like your baseball glove.
- It is nice to see you all again.
What brings you back to these lands?
- We're here to film a newborn bushbuck.
Last time, we failed to find one.
Frightfully disappointing, that.
- Don't worry, uncle nige.
I'm here now.
We'll find a bushbuck easy.
- Oh, but it's not easy at all, tyler.
A bushbuck mother conceals her baby in a bush
To camouflage it from predators.
- Yeah, and if a lion or my dad can't find it,
What makes you think you can?
- 'Cause I am the all-time scavenger hunt champion
Of kansas city.
- [Laughs]
A scavenger hunt's nothing like a real hunt.
Hey, juka? - Uh, sure.
They are very different.
- Tell us about one.
- Uh, my people need help with the herd.
I'll see you later.
- [Chattering]
- Let's commence our search
In that grove of trees downriver.
[Groaning]
Egad!
- Nigel, are you okay?
- Not to worry.
It's just my trick back acting up again.
- Should I set up the board?
- Oh, afraid so, darling.
I need to stay perfectly still
Until the spasm passes.
- [Chattering]
- Donnie, donnie, donnie, donnie--
Oh, I've got him, nigel.
- Marianne. - Donnie.
- No, donnie. - Nigel.
- Think it best
If nobody touches me,
Especially not donnie.
- Hey, juka, how about trading my mitt for your spear?
- A warrior can't trade his spear away.
Didn't I tell you he was annoying, juka?
- So what's it take to become a warrior anyway?
- The elders say that first you must prove
That you are brave, swift, and wise.
- But you don't have to prove any of those things.
- I must, if I want to be a warrior.
[Sighs]
But I can't even hit that target with my spear.
- Then can I have it?
- Ignore him.
I bet you can hit the center easy.
- [Inhales]
- Heavens, marianne,
Someone nearly impaled me with a spear.
- You see?
And that's the easiest part of being a warrior.
- You'll hit it next time.
- Ah-ha.
Ooh [chatters]
- Hey, mom, look.
Check out this cool bracelet the masai girls gave me.
- Could someone be kind enough to pass me the salt, please?
- Here you go, dad. - Many thanks, pet.
Oh.
I hate to be a bother.
But, could someone come and retrieve the salt?
- You know, dad, I saw this website
On the internet all about acupuncture.
- Needles?
Why not just put me on the rack?
- Wow, touchy.
- You know how your father is when his back goes out.
- Yeah, I like it better when his back is in.
- [Laughs]
- So what's up with your friend?
The masai girl said he's really bummed.
- Juka's worried he won't become a warrior.
- Oh, please.
That guy couldn't spear a fish in a barrel.
He'll never become a warrior.
- That's not true.
It just may take him a while.
It must be really hard.
- I could do it no problem.
- You? Ha.
I'd make a better warrior than you.
- You can't be a warrior.
You're a girl.
- What? - Actually, tyler's right.
- I am?
- Only masai men are allowed to be warriors.
- See? I told you.
- However, we're not masai.
We're thornberrys,
And every thornberry is a warrior.
- Oh, blast.
I've dropped my fork.
Marianne, could you feed me my peas?
- What are you doing? - [Gasp]
- You're not supposed to use juka's spear.
- Oh, come on. I just wanted to try it.
Let's see which one of us is a warrior.
- Oh, okay.
But be quiet.
- [Grunts]
- [Grunts]
- Yes.
Behold the warrior.
- So you're a little stronger.
I've still got way more courage.
- You?
Braver than me?
- I've come face-to-face with lions.
The scariest thing you've ever done
Is go to the mall by yourself.
- You're just jealous 'cause I'm stronger.
I'm braver. Oh, yeah, I'm brave.
I'm stronger. I'm a warrior.
Oh, yeah. Oh--oh.
Uh-oh.
Eliza?
Eliza?
Okay, fine.
Be that way.
[Grunts]
Ow.
Oh!
[Yelps] ow.
Eliza?
Is that you?
[Screams]
Lions!
- Please don't eat me.
Oh, please.
[Gasps]
[Panting]
Run for it before the lions get you!
- Perhaps you should see
These hungry lions before you run.
- [Moos]
[All laughing]
- Behold the warrior.
- Everybody, there's no danger.
Go to sleep.
- Why are you here?
We thought you were poachers trying to steal our cattle.
- I'm sorry, we just wanted to learn more about masai ways.
Tyler learned a lesson about being scared.
- My grandfather says that a warrior
And a coward are equally afraid.
How you act when your moment of truth arrives
Determines which one you are.
- When's your moment of truth?
- I don't know, but if I fail when it comes,
The village will laugh at me as they laughed at you.
- [Groans]
- Makai gave me an herbal remedy
That might help your back.
Can you turn over?
- Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
- Oh, I'm sorry, honey.
- [Groans]
- [Chattering]
- Oh, nigel.
- No, it's donnie.
Keep him back, marianne.
- Come on, donnie.
- Ooh.
- Well, at least this stuff won't go to waste.
- You should have seen him, debbie.
If makai hadn't stopped him,
He would have run all the way back to kansas city.
- Oh, yeah, he's a brave warrior all right.
"Moo."
[Both laughing]
- Ha, ha.
Juka said that every warrior has a moment of truth,
When mine comes, you watch.
I'll prove I'm more of a warrior
Than you two put together.
- If you want a contest, we're ready.
There's got to be something we can do
That shows we're brave, swift, and wise
Like the masai elders said.
Right, debbie?
- Ugh. I've got better things to do.
- Scared you'll break a nail or something?
You're gonna wish those cows trampled on you
When we're through.
- I know.
We'll try to track down a baby bushbuck.
First team to film it are the greatest warriors.
- That would be us.
The girls.
- Oh, dream on, cuz.
Hey, if we both find a bushbuck,
How will we know who won?
- The cameras have time codes.
We'll know to the exact second who filmed one first.
- Let's go.
- [Chattering]
- We have to split up?
But eliza, I want to be on your team.
- You can't, dar.
You have to go with tyler.
You're a boy.
- Actually, I'm a chimpanzee,
Which probably disqualifies me anyhow.
- He'll need you if he gets into trouble.
- But then, I'll be in trouble with him.
[Groans]
- Wahoo!
[Chattering]
- Hey, donnie, you knew those masai were coming
Before anyone else, right?
- Uh-huh. [Chattering]
- You want to find a bushbuck for me?
- [Chattering]
- [Chuckles]
I've got a secret w*apon.
Okay, donnie, lead us to victory.
- [Chattering]
- Humph.
- Let's head that way.
- I think we should go this way.
- We have more chances of finding a bushbuck
If we stay close to the river.
- The river curves up ahead.
My way's a shortcut.
- We don't need a shortcut.
We need to find a baby bushbuck.
- If you're gonna yell at me,
Just forget the whole thing.
- I'm not yelling at you!
I'm trying to inspire you.
If we lose to tyler, I'll never hear the end of it.
- What was I thinking?
What do I care about some stupid contest
Between two little brats?
- You can't leave. We're a team.
We're fighting for girls everywhere.
- Represent girl power by yourself.
- [Chattering]
- Donnie, where are we going?
I haven't seen a single bush for over a mile.
- [Chattering]
- You think a bushbuck is nearby?
Take me to him, donnie.
- [Chattering]
- Oh, man, I can't wait to see eliza's face
When she realizes I found--
The comvee?
Ugh.
- [Chattering]
- No, donnie.
Stay away.
- [Gasps]
Darwin, what are you doing here?
- Oh, thank goodness you've come, eliza.
I can't go another step.
- Where's tyler?
Did he find a bushbuck?
- [Spits]
Tyler couldn't find a bushbuck
If it walked up and introduced itself.
- Well, well, well, lookee here.
So you guys had enough? Ready to quit?
- Not a chance.
- [Rustling]
[Squeaking] - [gasps]
A baby bushbuck.
- Awesome. Tyler takes the prize.
- What? No way.
- Oh, yeah.
- Tyler, we have to go, now.
- Oh, don't tell me you're afraid of a little lightning.
- A lightning storm here is way worse than anywhere.
[Thunder cracking]
- [Gasps]
- Let's get out of here!
- Darwin, come on.
Get up, dar.
- [Whimpering]
- [Gasps]
- Eliza, I'll get help.
- There's no time. Help me make a firebreak.
- A what?
- A firebreak.
Scoop dirt on the fire to make an opening.
[Grunting]
[Both coughing]
- Let's get out of here.
- I've got to get darwin.
- I'll do it!
[Coughing]
- Dar, dar.
- Oh.
- The bushbuck.
[Panting]
Let's go before we're trapped again.
- Juka, have you seen my family?
- They are out on the savanna
Looking for a baby bushbuck.
[Thunder cracking]
- Nigel, the children are out in the storm.
We have to find them.
- Gracious, marianne.
Straighten me up.
[Groans]
Confound this blasted back.
- [Chattering]
- No, no--ah!
Ah.
- Whoo-hoo. - Oh, the spasm.
It's gone.
Donnie, you're a miracle worker.
- Glad you're better.
Let's go.
- Juka is missing.
- We must find him.
Gather a search party.
- What about the herd?
- My grandson is more important.
- We'll just follow the river.
It will lead us back to camp.
- Those animals are sure freaked out.
- [Growls]
- [Gasps]
- [Growling]
- Ah!
- [Growling]
- Run!
Run for the river!
- Go. I'll catch up.
Juka, your spear.
- Keep it. I have another idea.
[Grunting]
Quick, everyone in the water.
The leopard will not swim.
- [Laughing]
- [Gasps]
- Now what? We can't stay in here forever.
- He'll give up soon.
- Not soon enough. Look.
- Crocodiles!
- Get out of the water.
I'll slow them down.
- What's she doing? She's gonna get hurt.
- She'll be all right.
Eliza is a warrior.
- Hey, guys, see this.
It tastes even better than a wildebeest.
You want it?
You've got to swim for it.
Go, go, go!
- You were awesome, eliza.
- Ah--oof.
[Chattering]
- My village!
The herd. Where are the warriors?
- Out looking for you.
- Oh, no. This is my fault.
If we lose the herd--
- We won't. What would makai do?
- He would drive the herd across the river to safety.
- I'll help you.
- I'll help put out the fire.
- Hey, you guys, I know you're really scared right now,
But I know where it's safe.
- We're doomed.
- We're doomed.
All: doomed.
- No, you're not.
Just go across the river.
- The river is deep.
- It's got snakes.
- And crocodiles.
- Hey, I was just there and I'm okay.
Besides, we'll be there with you, I promise,
And there's lots of food on the other side.
- Food? - Food?
All: food.
- That's right. Now, spread the word.
[All mooing]
- Hey-oh. Hey-oh.
Hey-oh, hey-oh.
- [Chattering]
- Children, thank you for helping us.
We are truly grateful.
- Well, it was juka's idea
To drive the herd across the river.
- Yeah, talk about using your head.
You should have seen him save us from that leopard.
- Yes, he is a very smart young man,
And I am very proud of him.
- So is juka an official warrior now?
- Not yet, but things are,
As you say, looking up.
- Slowly.
We don't want to frighten her.
- I know. I know.
I still say I found it first.
- You did not.
- Did so. - Did not.
- Did so.
- Klasky csupo.
- Oh, yeah.
He's a brave warrior, all right.
"Moo."
03x04 - Critical Masai
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Eliza travels the world with her unusual family, as her parents make wildlife films.
Eliza travels the world with her unusual family, as her parents make wildlife films.