03x03 - Pinky & the Brain... And Larry/Where the Deer and the Mouselope Play

[bunniefuu]

Gee, Brain,

what do you want to do tonight?

The same thing we do
every night, Pinky,

try to take over the world.

- ♪ They're Pinky and the Brain ♪
- ♪ And Larry ♪

- ♪ Yes, Pinky and the Brain ♪
- ♪ And Larry ♪

♪ One is a genius
the other's insane ♪

♪ And the other
one's Larry ♪

- ♪ They're laboratory mice ♪
- ♪ So's Larry ♪

- ♪ Their genes have been spliced ♪
- ♪ Along with Larry ♪

♪ They're dinky, they're Pinky ♪

- ♪ And the Brain ♪
- ♪ And Larry ♪

-♪ Brain, brain, brain
-♪ And Larry, and Larry, and Larry ♪

- ♪ Brain, brain ♪
- ♪ And Larry, and Larry ♪

-♪ Brain, brain, brain
-♪ And Larry, and Larry, and Larry ♪

- ♪ Before each night is done ♪
- ♪ Larry will wake up ♪

- ♪ Their plan will be unfurled ♪
- ♪ All three of 'em ♪

- ♪ By the dawning of the sun ♪
- ♪ Larry likes the sun ♪

- ♪ They'll take over the world ♪
- ♪ And Larry will help ♪

♪ They're Pinky and the Brain ♪
♪ And Larry ♪

- ♪ Yes, Pinky and the Brain ♪
- ♪ And Larry ♪

♪ Their twilight campaign ♪

- ♪ Is easy to explain ♪
- ♪ Larry will explain it ♪

- ♪ To prove their mousy worth ♪
- ♪ Along with Larry ♪

- ♪ They'll overthrow the Earth ♪
- ♪ And so will Larry ♪

♪ They're dinky, they're Pinky ♪

- ♪ And the Brain, brain ♪
- ♪ And Larry ♪

- ♪ Brain, brain ♪
- ♪ And Larry, and Larry, and Larry ♪

- ♪ Brain, brain ♪
- ♪ And Larry, and Larry ♪

- ♪ Brain, brain ♪
- ♪ Larry, Larry, Larry, Larry ♪

- [Pinky] Narf!
- Larry says "narf," too.

Tonight's plan is
my masterpiece, Pinky...

And, uh, Larry.

Hi, there.

Ooh. Poit!

I particularly
like all the squiggly lines.

Yeah.

Those are not just
squiggly lines, Pinky...

and Larry.

Hello.

This is the formula

for the synchronoplastic
remote controller.

With this device,
I shall be able to control

every remote controller
in the country.

Ooh.
Will it be able to control

all the garage-door
openers, too, Brain?

And Larry?

Hi, there.

Hmm.

With just a few modifications,

it could.

Why, that's brilliant, Pinky...

and Larry.

Are you pondering
what I'm pondering?

I think so, Larry...

and, um, Brain,

but how can we get seven dwarves
to shave their legs?

I'm going
to have to hurt you, Larry.

But, Brain, what did I do?

Nothing.

With everyone's car
locked in their garages,

they'll be forced
to use bicycles,

crippling the petroleum industry

and bringing the world
to its knees.

I'm Larry.

Unfortunately,

to complete the synchronoplastic
remote controller...

Excuse me, Larry...

- Rrr.
- Ok.

Yaah!

I need a gyroscopic
transducer chip,

available only

with a White House
security code.

Oh, too bad, Brain...

and Larry.

I mean, it's not like

we can just march right up
to the White House

and go inside.

Oh, my, no.

We can't, Pinky, but...

Oh, and Larry...

But do you know who can?

Carrot Top?

Ow!

No, Pinky.

Hello.

And Larry.
Okay?

Okay.

Wallpaper hangers

can get into the White House.

Come!
There's no time to lose.

I'm Larry.

You look awfully small

for wallpaper hangers.

Actually we are
two laboratory mice

attempting to take
over the world.

And, uh, that's Larry.

Hello.

Ha ha ha.

Ah, you wacky little
wallpaper hangers.

Go on in.

We'll work our way toward
the security room.

Come over here with that ladder.

Ok.
Aah!

Grrr.

Unh!

Why, you lamebrain.
I oughtta...

Gangway!

Umph.

Oh, that's a lovely pattern,
isn't it, um...

I'm the one named Larry.

Narf!
It looks a little lumpy.

You ninny.
I'll put some lumps on you.

[whimpers]

Oh!

[crash]

Ow ow ow ow ow ow.

Brain, Larry, cheese!

Brain, Larry, cheese!

You knucklehead.

Aah...

And Larry.

[Butler]
Three wallpaper hangers?

Actually, he's just...

well...

he's Larry.

Hmph. I could believe
two wallpaper hangers,

But three?

Say, who are you trying to fool?

I'm throwing you out.

[yawning]

Narf!
I thought that plan

was really going
to work, Brain...

and, um, Larry.

So did I, Pinky...

and...

Larry.

Hello.

There was something
wrong tonight, but what?

Was it our costuming?

No.

I'm Larry.

Our faulty
paperhanging technique?

Hmm. Not that.

Hi, there.

No, Pinky and...

Larry.

It's all about teamwork,

that special chemistry,

the yin and the yang.

And Larry.

No. That's it.

It's just yin and yang.

There shouldn't be a Larry.

Zort!
Am I the yin or the yang?

I don't know, Pinky,

but he is definitely the Larry.

Oh, all right.
I can take a hint.

I'm changing my name
to Art and finding a new career.

♪ Listen ♪

♪ To the smells
of loudness. ♪

Turn that thing off.

We have to prepare
for tomorrow night.

What are we going to do
tomorrow night, Brain?

The same thing we do
every night, Pinky,

Try to take over the world...

without Larry.

[door creaks]

Hello.

Who are you?

I'm Zeppo.

♪ They're dinky, they're Pinky ♪

- ♪ And the Brain, brain ♪
- ♪ And Zeppo ♪

- ♪ Brain, brain, brain ♪
- ♪ Zeppo, Zeppo, Zeppo, Zeppo! ♪

In tonight's plan, Pinky,

We shall confuse humanity
into submission.

By asking them
how Marisa Tomei won an Oscar?

No.

By stranding them
in hopeless mental and physical gridlock

through the use of...



Naaarrf!

[Brain]
Observe, Pinky.

Our first guinea pig.

[Scientist]
Hmm...

What is it?

I can't tell.

No!

It doesn't work for me!

[crash]

Yes!

The experiment
is an unqualified success.

Egad! What did you hide
in that poster, Brain,

a picture of Kenny Kingston?

I am not cruel, Pinky.

The cryptic genius of my plan
is that hidden in this poster

is no secret message
of any kind whatsoever.

No secret message?

Poit!

Um, oh, you're right, Brain.

That is confusing.

We shall construct
a series of magic-eye billboards

three miles high
and 11 miles wide

over the nation's freeways.

As the confounded commuters

struggle in vain

to decipher
the nonexistent messages,

they will become stranded

in a never-ending rush hour,

thus giving us
an opportunity to seize power.

Oof.

Brilliant, Brain.

Oh, wait.
No, no.

What if the pictures just make people
all wobbly and sick?

Then there will be a lot
of cleaning up to do.

Now come!

We must obtain
an inordinate amount of steel

to construct the frames
for our billboards.

Zort! How will we
get the steel, Brain?

Reparations, Pinky.

We shall take the steel
by birthright.

We better sign up
for Lamaze classes, then.

Many a species has been driven

to the brink of extinction

through man's callous
disregard for nature,

but there may be
no story more tragic

than that of
the fabled mousealope.

Mousealope?

Zort! Isn't that
a fur-covered cantaloupe?

No, Pinky.
That would be your head.

Oh, right.
Ho ho ha ha ha!

Mousealopes were once as common
as ordinary field mice, Pinky.

They grazed on the sweet
spring grass

and nurtured their young
in peace until...

Mother?

Why is everyone
so still on the meadow?

Man is in the forest.

[g*nf*re]

[Brain] Sadly, they were hunted
into extinction

for their majestic antlers,

which made perfect toothpicks.

Poit.

Oh, how sad.

Is it all true?

That's what it says
on the back of this gift shop postcard.

And people have
believed it for years.

But weep not, Pinky.

Though the world has seen
neither hide nor horn of them

in over a hundred years,

the mousealopes are about
to make a spectacular comeback.

Oh, I hope Mike Nesmith
joins them this time.

[gasp]

Brain, come quick.

I see a mousealope.

Oh, now be quiet,
or you'll startle it.

Too late.

Wah-haa-hoo!

Ulp!

Narf!
Ha ha ha hoo!

Come, Pinky.

We are off to reclaim

the sacred breeding ground
of our forefathers.

The city dump?

No, Pinky.

The city of Pittsburgh,
Pennsylvania,

steel capital
of the United States.

Soon, all the steel
in these mills will be ours.

Ohh.
And we can make slinkys.

Ooh, I just love slinkys.

Then why don't you marry one?

Hoo ha ha!
Good one, Brain.

Witty. Heh.

Narf!

I, too, have my moments
of jocularity, Pinky.

I see something.

Doe?

A deer.

A female deer?

Can't tell.

Retreat!

Waah!
Yaah!

Ooh.
Ooh.

This is a pain
that is nearly flawless.

[horn honks]

Yes.

Now it is perfect.

There they are.

Stop!

You talking to me?

These are endangered animals.

Look at this gift shop postcard.

What's a mousealope?

That's us!

Mousealope.
Why, it's the rarest species

in North America,

and you almost k*lled them.

Shame on you.

Does that mean we can't eat 'em?

The poll numbers
are not encouraging, sir.

Your charisma quotient is...

well, nonexistent.

And your cute-and-cuddly
count is even worse.

People need to know
that Del Monte cares about...

something, but what does
Del Monte care about?

Well, you'd better
think of something quick.

What about this, sir?

Previously believed extinct,
the discovery today

of a pair of rare
North American mousealopes

has stunned the entire country.

Mousealope?

What's that?

Doesn't matter, sir.

They're cute.

And cuddly.

Hmm.

Del Monte cares
about the mousealopes.

[cheering]

That is why Del Monte

has authored the Mousealope
Protection Act,

which will let these cute and cuddly
fellows propagate unabated.

Won't we need
special shoes to do that, Brain?

Ooh!

[whimpers]

Pittsburgh is now officially
mousealope country.

[cheering]

"Mousealopes."
Mm-hmm.

"Granted full protection
of the Endangered Species Act." Mm-hmm.

"Do not remove tag
under penalty of law."

Mm-hmm.

"All rights reserved."

Ahem.

Good people of Pittsburgh,

- lend me your ears.
- Huh?

[Woman]
What? He can speak?

It would be impossible
to erase the nightmare

my species has endured
for the past 100 years.

For just pennies a day,

you can save
a hungry mousealope.

Oof!

Your sponge, sir.

[fake sobbing]

[Brain] But this landmark legislation
will serve to repair

the great injustice that mankind

has perpetrated
on the mousealopes.

[crowd cheering]

By giving back

the sacred breeding ground
of our ancestors,

which includes
the legal ownership

of your entire city
and all of its steel mills.

[audience silent]

Uh, not a good time
to be clapping, sir.

Definitely not a good time.

You have 48 hours to vacate
your homes and businesses,

or you shall be
forcibly relocated

by order of the Mousealope
Protection Act.

Thank you for your
warm reception.

Y'all come back now,
you hear? Troz!

[muttering]

[Brain]
♪ Pittsburgh is my land ♪

♪ It isn't your land ♪

♪ Go find your own land ♪

♪ 'Cause this is my land ♪

♪ Please find your way to ♪

♪ The nearest e-e-exit ♪

♪ Pittsburgh's
for mousealopes only ♪

[Brain]
The dogalope...

the chimpalope...

the grizzly bearalope...

the fishalope...

and, lest we forget...

the manalope.

All of these creatures
once roamed free

across this great land.

Don't let their fate befall
this little fellow.

This is a mousealope.

This is a mousealope
in a frying pan.

Sizzle. Yaah!

Sizzle. Ooh!

Any questions?

Ha ha ha ha!
Narf.

A mousealope is
a terrible thing to waste.

[Pinky and Brain]
♪ Pittsburgh's for mousealopes only ♪

[Brain]
Paid for by N.A.A.M.

The National Association
for the Advancement of Mousealopes.

And the best actor
award goes to...

Marlon Brando.

[audience cheering]

Hello.
I am a mousealope.

I am representing
Marlon Brando this evening.

Marlon has asked me to tell you

that he cannot accept this award

due to the treatment
of the mousealopes by all of humanity.

[audience booing]

[Brain] I hope
that in the future,

we will all live together
in love and generosity.

And by the way,

get out of Pittsburgh.

Thank you, on behalf
of Marlon Brando.

[booing]

And, uh, since he
doesn't want the award,

I'll take it.

[Mob]
Mousealopes, no!

We won't go!

Mousealopes, no!

We won't go!

[Newscaster]
Protecting the mousealopes...

An act of environmental
compassion,

or a stupid political blunder?

The debate rages on.

Senator, critics are saying
you favor cute little rodents

over high-paying jobs.

Poppycock-a-doodle-doo!

Del Monte hates the mousealopes.

Well, aren't you waffling
from your previous position, sir?

Of course not.

Everybody knows
that Del Monte's a pancake man.

Offering a counterpoint
to Senator Del Monte,

Actor and activist Martin Sheen

joins us from his home on Mars.

Uh, I mean Malibu.

Thanks, Fred.

I'd just like to welcome the mousealopes
back from extinction

and tell them how sorry I am

about the terrible way
they've been treated.

They're always welcome
here in Malibu.

I'm sure they are.

Coming up,

we'll hear from
the mousealopes themselves.

[munching, gulp]

Pinky, do I look cute
and cuddly enough

for our nationally
televised appearance?

Um, uh... uh...

Are you going
to eat that, Brain,

or are you saving it for later?

Spinach!

Drat!

Well, if you're not going to eat it,
can I have it?

Oh, you can have it,
Pinky, anytime.

Well, thank... oop!

Where can I find
a blasted toothpick?

Pancakes, waffles.

Why didn't you tell me
I'd be debating the four food groups?

[gasp]

You have to see this.

Sir, you won't believe it.

Huh?

Boy, those antlers
sure come in handy.

[Fred] And so the people
of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania,

forced from their homes
by the Mousealope Protection Act,

begin their exodus
in the spirit of cooperation

and brotherly love.

Get out of the road, clown!

Behold, Pinky.

The city is... oof!

Ours.

Oh ho, Brain!

Stop clowning around.

Ha ha!

If our moment of triumph
weren't nearly upon us,

I would feel obliged
to hurt you.

The city belongs to us, Pinky.

Do you know what that means?

We can run wild and free
in our underpants?

No, Pinky.

The Pittsburgh steel is ours!

[gasp]
Does this mean I can finally rub

the top of
Terry Bradshaw's head? Poit!

Aah!

We can set phase two
of our plan into motion.

Oh, that. Zort!

Well, it looks
like we'll have a lot of help.

Help?

Hmm.
From the mousealopes.

Pinky, it's all a scam.

There are no other mousea...

- Lopes.
- [rumbling]

Yeow!
Ooh!

Aah! Aah!
Argh!

[Man] This should help
our boss get elected.

And due to the wanton
proliferation of the mousealopes,

which is threatening the delicate
ecological balance of this great land,

Del Monte is very proud
to support

the controlled hunting
of mousealopes.

[cheering]

Um, are we about to become
extinct again, Brain?

No, Pinky, not while
we can still...

Run!

Aah!

There. Two perfect mousealope
specimens for our lab.

Oh, cheer up, Brain.

We could always go
to work for Santy Claus.

Ha ha ha... oh!

At least we're being taken
back to the lab, Pinky,

Where we can pack
for our Malibu trip.

Malibu? Are we gonna
take over the world from there?

No. I just don't want
to pass up an invitation...

to Martin Sheen's house!

♪ They're dinky,
they're Pinky ♪

♪ And the Brain, brain,
brain, brain, brain. ♪

[music playing]