01x20 - Stinking Badges/Mech Daddy

[bunniefuu]

Narrator:miracle city, a spicy cesspool of crime and villainy.

This is the story of manny rivera...

Better known as...

Manny: el tigre.

Son of the legendary hero...

Dad: white pantera.

Grandson of the evil supervillain...

Grandfather: puma loco.

[♪...]

Crowd: el tigre!

[Siren wails]

[Cheering]

El tigre!

[Roaring]

[Roars]

Crowd: el tigre!

[♪...]

Man: we here to honor police chief suarez.

The first day I meet the chief, he nod at me.

Second day, again he nod.

Third day, I out sick, so I no sure if he nod.

But I like to think he did.

[Groans]

This has been the longest six hours of my life.

It's only been minutes.

Now welcoming miracle city's junior police cadets

Led by the chief's beloved daughters, anita and nikita.

Hey, I'm his beloved daughter too.

[Audience cheering]

Silence!

[Grunting]

[Grunting...]

[Girl groaning]

Chief suarez rules!

[Cheering]

[Crash, cadets moan]

Now frida suarez...

Who is, uh, maybe related to the chief "somehows".

Frida: daughter!

[Crickets chirping]

[♪...]

♪ Papa

♪ Emiliano is your name

♪ Papa

♪ Truth and justice are your aim ♪

♪ And you...

♪ Crush the bad guys, crush the bad guys ♪

♪ Crush, crush, crush, crush, crush the bad guys ♪

♪ Ow...

Thank you, miracle city!

Yes!

[Pants]

Uh... Chief suarez rules?

[Crash]

[Murmuring]

Woman: what was she thinking?

That's not music.

Papa, why is frida so weird?

Your sister is not weird.

She is...

Different.

From us.

Different?

I'm different?

Come on, you've got plenty in common with your family.

Let's get crazy and quiz each other on obscure points of law.

All: yay!

[Chuckles]

Different, huh?

Well, not anymore.

I'm gonna be just like my sisters.

You're gonna be twins?

I'm gonna be a junior police cadet.

This I swear.

[Siren wails]

Welcome to junior police cadet tryouts, maggots.

You are all worthless and weak.

Hooray!

Before we begin, i...

Frida,youwant to be a junior police cadet?

I'm here for moral support.

Which I can give from over there.

A junior police cadet must be strong of will, swift of foot

And above all... Honest.

Eh, two out of three.

I wish you all good luck.

You're gonna need more than luck.

[Groans]

[Laughing]

[Gags]

[Grunting]

[Laughing]

[Groaning]

[Dog barks]

[Grunting]

[Laughing]

[Chirping]

[Frida snoring]

Frida... Frida?

Churros!

Where?

[Chirping]

Arms... Ow... Stuck.

Chief: good morning, frida, i...

Who are you surrendering to?

Papa, any decision on who made junior police cadet, hmm?

I know you tried your best, but...

[Squeaks]

I... It's just that...

Congratulations, you are a junior police cadet.

I am?

She is?

Oh, papa, I'll be just like you.

Where am I gonna work, vice, bunco, swat team?

Uh... Well, it is very special.

Frida: staple squad.

I give up.

They say stapling is the unsung hero of law enforcement.

My dad's always gonna see me as the blue-haired goofball of the family.

[Squishing sound]

Hmm... Not if I bag the supervillains and you take the credit.

[Frida clears throat]

Staple squad, put 'em up.

Dr. Chipotle, sr., Thinks not, little girl.

Aha!

Oh, hey, dad.

Looky who I caught robbing the casino.

By myself, without any help.

Alone.

[Growling]

Mija,how did you do it?

Were you walking a b*at, on a stakeout, did you get a tip from an informant?

Yeah, uh, the last one.

And I used all that other police junk too.

Let me help you,mija.

[♪...]

Hey!

We know you're up to something.

And when we find out what it is, you will suffer!

Papa.

We were just praising frida for her police work.

Ah, as you should.

Why don't we all go see her surprise together?

Surprise?

Your own office.

And it has a door that connects to mine

So whenever you like, we can discuss police work and forensics.

Forensics?

Mmm, I love soup.

Eh, well, I must get back to work.

Mija,i'm very proud of you.

Shouldn't you go staple something?

Chief: swift of foot, and above all, honest... [Echo]

Check out what's at the museum.

...the golden mustache of the pharaohs.

The mustache mafia are totally gonna...

Hey, what's wrong?

Nothing.

It's just... Lying to my dad like this...

Oh, you feeling a little guilty?

No, of course not.

Guilty, me? [Laughs]

I laugh.

Guilt slides off me like water off a duck's back.

A filthy, stinking, no-good duck who lies to her dad.

Uh, so are we going after the mustache mafia or not?

One last bust, then me and dad will be golden forever.

Easy, you mugs, this thing is worth more than all of yous put together.

Frida: you guys are going down.

Staple squad.

You're the disease and I'm...

The lame-o who's gonna watch el tigre kick your butts.

You're on, boom-boom.

You got it.

[El tigre roaring]

Anita and nikita: see, papa?

We told you... Frida lied.

Papa, i...

I'm sorry.

Papa!

Wait a minute!

You stay out of this, rivera.

She lied to me.

Yeah, she lied...

But only 'cause she wanted to be a good cadet so you'd like her more.

What?

How could I like her more?

I love my frida.

She is...

My frida.

Don't tell me, tell her.

[Screams]

Put our sister down!

[Screaming]

[Grunting]

[Screams]

Frida!

Put my little girl down.

Papa?

All: chief suarez?

[Shrieking]

Thanks, dude, i...

Whoa.

No one touches my frida, no one.

Aw... I guess he reallydoes care about me.

[Grunting]

[Grunting]

And next time I won't go so easy on you.

Frida...

You don't have to do anything to make me love you.

You are perfect just the way you are.

Thanks, papa.

[Siren wailing]

[♪...]

Manny, as your father, it is my job to keep you safe.

I'm afraid I must forbid you to fight giant robots.

Aw, dad, just one more?

Well, you can finish this one... Withmy supervision.

You have super vision?

Like x-ray, or lasers?

Adios, giant robot sanchez.

Bo-bo-beep.

[Power shuts off audibly]

Now clean up this mess.

And when you get home, we will have our th talk about crime-fighting safety.

But louder this time!

Oh, why's he always so worried about my safety wheninever even think about it?

[Gasps] sanchez!

Manny: the orphanage... The puppy hospital...

The arcade!

[Screams]

We gotta do something.

Yeah, I still have $ worth of game tokens.

He's out cold.

How are we gonna move him?

The only thing strong enough to move him would be... Him.

Aha!

What?

Ok, we just have to figure out how to control sanchez's body.

Which should be... Easy?

Oh, this is impossible.

This is way to high-techy for us.

This is...

Exactly like the controls for mutant guitar avenger !

Dude, I can not only drive this guy, I can make him play a wicked solo.

[♪...]

[Screaming]

Frida: sorry... Oh... Heads up, my bad.

Oh, I'm sorry... Whoops.

See, no damage.

[♪...]

Hey, you know what time it is?

It's giant robot joyride time.

Frida: ooh, ooh, we can stomp on the bubble wrap factory.

[Manny and frida laughing][bubbles popping]

Manny: or we could toilet paper all of miracle city.

Manny and frida: whoo-hoo!

Frida: I know...

How 'bout "ding dong ditch" on the moon?

Man: autopilot engaged.

Return to base, return to base.

What, no.

No base-y return-y.

[Screaming]

Where's it taking us?

Arctic ice cave?

Ocean trench?

The moon?

[Ice cream truck music playing]

Yay, yay, yay, yay...

Howdy, neighbor.

Howdy, neighbor.

Frida: kind of not what I expected.

Man: autopilot disengaged.

Hey, we're back in control.

Then get us out of here.

Dude, we're out of rocket gas.

Daddy, daddy.

Daddy?

Andra, robio, stop jumping on your father.

He's had a long day.

Hello, dear... Boopy.

Blech.

Blech, giant robot germs.

Are you all right, honey?

Oh, I hope it's not another catastrophic systems failure.

Last time you were out for days.

"Catastrophic systems failure."

Dang.

Sweetie, beep?

Bail?bail.

[Groans]

[Sniffs] daddy?

Oh, man, we totally broke their dad.

No, you broke their dad, I wrecked the puppy hospital.

Stall... I'll work on the door.

You said you would help me fix my scooter.

You said.

[Guitar chords]

Mama, is daddy ok?

Daddy's going crazy.

We gotta go.

It's ok to break their hearts, right?

And traumatize them for life, right?

This is where you say "right."

[Sobbing]

Daddy's fine, kids.

[Beeping]

Yay, daddy.

Let's do something, daddy.

Volcanoes, volcanoes, boop-boop-beep, boop-boop-beep.

Now, robio, we're your parents.

It's our job to keep you safe.

You know you're not allowed to play in the volcanoes.

Whoa... Deja vu.

That's french.

Have fun.

Safely.

Well?

Let's do this thing.

Last one in the lava's a rotten egg.

[Beeping]

[Cheering]

[♪...]

[Speaking gibberish...]

Andra and robio: awesome!

Yay!yay!

[Laughing]

Whoo, yeah, here we go.

Yippee, ay-ay-ay-ay...

[Doorbell rings]

This rocks, daddy.

Look how much fun they're having.

Yeah, 'cause we let 'em do stuff ourdads would never let us do.

We're the greatest dad ever.

Oh, whoa... Robio!

Daddy!

No, the ice won't hold our weight.

Can we fly?

No fuel.

There's gotta be a way to run the rockets

Off sanchez's main batteries.

Aah! Daddy, do something!

Time for some rewiring.

Oh, man... This is gonna hurt.

[Manny screams]

Daddy!

I'm going for it.

[♪...]

[Screams]

Come on, come on.

[Screams]

[Screaming...]

[Cheering]

Whew... That wasn't so bad, huh?

So many... Hurtings.

That was the best day ever.

We got to fall off a glacier.

Sweet.

And then, zoom, you flew down and grabbed us.

That was awesome.

Beep-boop.

Wait here, we have somethingfor you.

Man, we stink as a dad.

What are you talking about?

We totally saved them.

Saved them from us.

Glacier skating was our idea, remember?

Uh, we stink as a dad.

Man: system rebooting.

Hey, sanchez is back.

[Beeping]

Man: intruders, intruders.

Where, where?

Oh.

[Screaming]

Daddy...

We have something for you.

Both: world's greatest dad!

[Grunting]

[Beeping]

Wha?

Dude, talk human.

"Sanchez does not know why his enemies have helped his family

But sanchez thanks you."

You're welc...

"I hope this does not injure you."

What?

[Screaming]

[Laughing]

Daddy cut the cheese.

It's weird.

I kind of understand now why my dad acts all dad-ish.

Understand, yes... Like, no.

Hey, look, the miracle city volcano.

Manny: oh, good.

[♪...]

[Crowd cheering]

[Kids laughing]