01x11 - The Ballad of Frida Suarez/Fool Speed Ahead

[bunniefuu]

Announcer:miracle city,

A spicy cesspool of crime

And villainy.

This is the story of

Manny rivera,

Better known as...

[Manny roars]

Manny: el tigre!

Son of the legendary hero...

White pantera!

Grandson of the evil

Super-villain...

Puma loco.

["El tigre" theme plays...]

Crowd: el tigre!

[Sirens wailing]

[Cheering]

El tigre!

[♪...]

[Roaring]

[Roars]

Crowd: el tigre!

[♪...]

[School bell rings]

Frida: no, I can't hang out

With you.

Uh, I didn't say anything

About...

I don't have time.

Me and the atomic sombreros

Are playing in the battle of

The bands tomorrow morning.

I gotta write a new song,

The greatest song of all time.

This is just the first step.

I'll play on tv, I'll be huge.

People will get tattoos

Of my face on their faces.

I'll live my rock star dream.

I... Will... Have... Fans!

I see.

So want to go to the arcade?

Five minutes, tops.

Well, time to go home and write

That masterpiece.

Why is the sky so dark?

Manny: we were in there for

Five hours.

[Frida screams]

Don't worry, frida.

We'll get you home.

We'll stop for nothing.

[expl*si*n]

Not even that.

Man: help, please help!

[Alarm rings]

Oh-ho-ho, the agony!

Five minutes, tops.

Man: won't someone help?

Oh, please, I don't understand

Why...

Silence, flesh-bag.

All we want is miracle city's

Entire supply of platinum

And we will be on our way.

["El tigre" theme plays]

Ooh, oy, aye!

[Sirens wailing]

Curses.

Just when the precious platinum

Was within my grasp.

This isyour fault, el tigre.

Feel the sting of

Sartana's strings.

[Screams]

Sartana:bandidos, vámonos.

[Rats squeak and eat loudly]

Dude, awesome... Underpants.

Listen to me.

No one must ever know of this,

No one!

Got it.

Now I gotta write a song!

Ok, we could start with...

[Snores]

[♪...]

♪ Baby, baby, yeah.

[Cheering]

Man: and now,

The atomic sombreros.

[Feedback whines]

Frida: I'm here, come on,

Let's do it.

You finished the song?

No.

Blues riff in "b,"

Watch me for the changes,

And try to keep up.

♪ I was walking down

The street ♪

Audience: boo... [Hisses]

Frida, you can do it.

Think of your fans.

Think of the face-on-face

Tattoos.

Feel the sting of

Sartana's strings.

♪ She tossed el tigre

Like a salad ♪

♪ Sartana of the dead

♪ Listen to my sartana ballad,

Listen to me shred ♪

♪ She slashed him

And smashed him

And blasted his hair ♪

♪ She flipped him

And stripped him

To his underwear ♪

♪ Zebra donkey underwear

♪ Sartana crushed el tigre

Like a worm. ♪

[Cheering]

[Laughter]

[Farting noise]

Boy: there she is.

[Screams]

[Screams]

[Gasps]

Girl: sign my face.

Girl: I love you.

Whoa, sorry, dude.

Ah, it'll wash off.

"Won't wash off."

[Laughs weakly]

Song didn't bug you, right?

You're ok with it, right?

Well...

Thanks, dude,

You're the best, mwa.

Yeah.

[Crowd screams]

So the song was a little harsh.

So what?

This is frida's dream,

And she only sang it once,

Nobody's gonna remember it.

♪ She tossed el tigre

Like a salad ♪

♪ Sartana of the dead

♪ Listen to my sartana ballad,

Listen to me shred ♪

♪ She slashed him

And smashed him

And blasted his hair ♪

♪ She flipped him

And stripped him

To his underwear ♪

♪ Zebra donkey underwear

♪ Sartana crushed el tigre

Like a worm ♪

♪ Yeah.

[Cheering]

My dreams are finally

Coming true.

Except the one where my mom

Is a giant snail, only she's

Really a post office.

Yeah, that's really, uh,

Good.

Hey, do you think maybe people

Are getting sick of hearing

That same song?

[Gasps]

What are you trying to do,

Jinx me?

We're going on"caliente o

Basura" today, the whole

City'll be watching!

[Grunts]

Hola, "m" city.

I'm c.c. Puede, and it's time

To decide is it awesome

Or awful?

On"caliente o basura" tonight,

The atomic sombreros!

♪ Sartana crushed el tigre

Like a worm. ♪

That song was awesome!

Huh, minutes ago.

Yeah, that isso p.m.

Boo... [Hisses]

[Frida screams]

[Cheering]

Tough audience, huh?

You jinxed me!

What?

You totally trashed me,

And istill had your back.

Hey, I put your name

In an awesome hit song,

And what do you do?

You jinx me with your

Jinxy-winxy backstabbing jinx!

Uh-huh.

Call me when you remember

How to be a friend again.

Sartana: frida suarez.

[Whimpers]

I won't hurt you,

Little blue-haired child.

I like your song.

Your melody rings true.

Your fans were fools

To abandon you, fools.

Yeah.

Together, we can show them

The error of their ways.

Write another song about me

Humiliating el tigre,

And I will arrange the concert

Of your dreams.

Hmm, you don't have an evil

Ulterior motive, do you?

Uh, aye, heavens.

No.

[Cheering]

We're here live from

The prison graveyard for

The atomic sombreros

"Back from la muerte" show.

Sartana may be evil incarnate,

But she has put together

A kickin' concert!

My worst nightmare is on tv.

And it pre-empted wrestling!

[Cheering]

[♪...]

[Chomping noise]

[Sipping noise]

Let's do this.

[Cheering]

Frida: sartana, what-

Evil ulterior motive.

Thank you for coming, everyone.

You bought your ticket in.

Now miracle city must buy

Your ticket out.

[People scream]

Whoa, awesome concert!

Miracle city, give me all

Your platinum, or this audience

Will learn to appreciate

"Underground" music.

This is just what frida and

Her tigre-hating fans deserve.

[People scream]

I'm not gonna save 'em, no way,

Nunca, not a chance.

Help.

I'm allergic to zombies.

These are brand-new shoes!

Maybe I'll just save 'em

A little.

Sartana: I'd like to hear

Your new song,or I'd like to

Hear you scream.

I'll give you a song.

♪ Sartana of the dead

Has maggots in her head ♪

♪ And when el tigre gets here,

He'll slice her like rye bread ♪

♪ Ow.

[Gasps] you dare...

El tigre: now that's what

I call music.

["El tigre" theme plays...]

Bye, frides, the after-party

Is at rose's, if you live.

Time for the big finale.

[g*n-like cocking noise]

[Feedback whines]

[Growls]

It's too late, girl.

Nothing can save your fans now!

Manny, I'm sorry.

For being a selfish jerk

Who cared more about being

A rock star than she did about

Her best friend?

Uh, yeah, and for this.

[Screams]

Whew.

[Cheering]

Frida's goggles.

No!

You're ok.

And I'm not.

Yeah, i... [Gasps].

My goggles, no!

Haven't I paid enough for

My rock star jerkiness?

Uh, no.

[Screams and cries]

Yep, that'll do it.

[♪...]

[Crickets chirping]

This roof doesn't look

Too sturdy.

Ah, what you talking about?

It's fine.

[El tigre screams]

[Growling noises]

What do we got here,

Partners?

It's el tigre and puma loco,

Man, you deaf in the eyes

Or something?

Oso, dr. Chipotle senior

Suggests you get rid of

This hideous creature.

Creature?

Him my twin brother,

El osito.

[Bleats]

We exactly alike, man.

Let's get to what we

Came for.

Yes, is time...

To sign up for the super-villain

Grand prix.

Puma loco, this illegal

Street race is for

Villains only.

Are you saying I am

No villain, voltura?

Not you, the boy.

[Clucks]

He more like a hero

Than a villain, lately.

Me?

Ha!

Would a hero do this?

A wet willy?

[Gasps]

Dr. Chipotle senior

Still feels that el tigre

Should be disqualified!

But I gotta be in the race.

Me and grandpapi always

Do it together.

This maybe got something

To do with me and tigre win

The race every year?

Uh, no, uh...

Well, if he no race,

I no race.

I stand by my grandson.

Good, because this year's

Prize is $ gazillion.

Don't let the door hit you

On the way out.

[El tigre screams]

[Grunts] no!

This is about more than money.

[Gasps]

This about family tradition.

We can make a deal.

[El tigre screams]

You let manny race...

[Crashing noise]

And if we no win, eh, uh...

Then the riveras will leave

Miracle city forever.

All: deal!

[Gulps]

Puma loco: leave miracle

City?

I was going to say we wash

Their cars for a month.

I don't know what happened,

I just got caught up in

The moment and...

We really gotta win this race!

Oh, we going to win.

Checkingthis out.

The rivera-mobile!

Whoa.

And I got us the best

Mechanic churros can buy.

Dude, this car's all full of,

Like, parts and junk.

Frida, you don't know

Anything about cars.

It's ok, I got

Two assistants.

[Chomping noise]

Donkey: hee-haw.

Eeh... Yeah.

How am I gonna tell dad

That if we lose...

If we lose, what?

[Screams]

[Stammers]

If we lose, uh, a minute before

We tell you... How tall you are.

Then, uh, we be sad.

Ah, of course.

As you all know, I have tried

To bust the super-villain

Grand prix for years now.

Has anyone heard when

It might be happening again?

Not me.

I know nothing.

Wait, how tall is he?

Be on the lookout.

This year, I will stop the race.

This I swear!

Ha, my boy, he pretty,

But he's not so bright.

[Alarm beeps]

Maybe they all forfeited.

Then we won't have to leave

Miracle city and...

We gonna roll right over

You, mans.

[Horse neighs]

[Clucks]

[Tires squeal]

Vroom, vroom, man.

[Engine stalls and kicks]

El tigre/puma loco: frida!

[Grunts]

Ah!

All right, which idiot left

A churro in the- wait,

This one's mine.

We still in the race, manny.

Flock of fury, dead ahead.

Egg!

Egg in the hole!

They get away.

Gotcha, turkey-lady, man.

My friends can't waits to

See them.

Bandidos...

att*ck.

Why nobody tells me

Company is coming?

I would have made coffee.

[Phone rings]

Is rodolfo.

Eh, hello?

Papi, the race is happening.

Have you seen manny?

I need him right now

To help me find it.

Uh, have no see him.

[Makes static-like noise]

Here at the [static] beach.

Uh, bad [static] connection,

Ooh, starfish, bye.

Ooh.

It's like the villains

Are working together to

Make sure we lose.

Imposible, villains don't

Know the meaning of the word

"Teamwork."

Or "eggplant."

Do they know the meaning

Of the word "I'm gonna kick

Your butt"?

Chipotle: let go, let go,

Let go, let go, let go!

Swine!

Ha, all right, we're gonna...

Stop the car!

What, what, what is it?

Oil leak, flat tire,

We going to explode?

Let's just say

It's important.

[Toilet flushes]

Anybody else have to go?

No way they catch up now,

Mans.

And we defeated them

By using team, uh, team,

What's the word?

Eggplant?

Now that the riveras

Ain't a-gonna win, somebody's

Got to get that $ gazillion,

And that somebody's a-gonna

Be me.

Adios, buckaroos.

[Groans]

[Snores]

[Villain laughs]

[Buzzer sounds

The bridge is out, but we're

Not going fast enough

To jump it.

Frida, we have to make it,

Everything's riding on this.

I know, I know.

Now which button...

Frida!

Trying!

[Heart beats]

[Screams]

[Heartbeat increases]

[Parrot speaks indistinctly]

Stop the car!

No time for donkey potty!

Not that, that!

[Roars]

Yee-ha-ha-ha!

$ Gazillion and el tigre

A-leaving a-town are all

Within my grasps.

[Train whistle toots]

[Roars]

Ok, didn't see that coming.

Frida: yeah, all right!

[Puma loco laughs]

Almost there.

[Engine sputters out]

Don't worry, dudes.

I know just the button to push

This time.

Man: ♪ hey, yeah...

♪ Ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh

What, you don't like

Slow jams?

Even if we survive getting

Digested by this alligator,

We have to leave miracle city

Forever.

I really messed up big

This time, grandpapi.

Manny, when you're right,

You're right.

[Creaking noise]

Ah-ha, at last, i...

[Gasps]

Manny!

In a racecar!

In an alligator?

What's going on here?

Tell me everything.

The villains wouldn't let us

Be in the bet, so I made a bet

That I know I shouldn't have,

But it was really important,

So then i...

Ok, not everything.

If we don't cross that

Finish line first, the riveras

Have to leave miracle city

Forever.

[Train whistle toots]

[Sighs]

Dad.

I can't believe he left us.

Ornery, flea-bitten

Coyotes.

[White pantera grunts]

Victory is muh...

Oh, sh**t.

Puma loco: yeah!

[Laughs]

[El tigre and frida cheer]

Good-night, sweet prince,

And flights of- hey, a quarter.

We did it, grandpapi.

We don't have to leave

Miracle city.

Yes, and family tradition...

[Screams]

Hello, monies.

[Screams]

Uh-oh, you got the "I'm going to

Take the monies away" look.

This should cover the damage

To the city.

What damage?

[People screaming]

I'm sorry, dad.

I know I shouldn't have

Made that bet or entered

An illegal race or lied to you.

That's nice.

Did you see?

I finally stopped the race

After all these years!

I did it.

♪ Who thehombre,

Who thehombre? ♪

It isi who am thehombre.

And as for you two, I have

A word of advice, run.

Run?

El tigre: run!

[Alligator roars]

["El tigre" theme plays...]

[Children cheering]

El tigre: we're free!