03x09 - Doug's Hot Property/Doug and the Little Liar

[bunniefuu]

[ Yelps]

[ Barks]

[ Electric guitar playing]

[ Man singing scat]

[ Barks]

Cool! Whoa!

[ Thwack]

[ Barks]

Doug:
mr. Sully, I'll give you
three brainwave womans

Four human cyclones
and one yo-yo girl.

Hmm, no, I
don't think so.

I mean this amazing man
o' steel mannumber

Is not just any old
man o' steel man.

This is the last issue drawn
by the original creator

Darby blue.darby blue.

I know, so what
if I add...

The first five issues
of the lumpy squad?

[ Sighs]

All right, kid.

Looks like you
really want this.

Look, skeeter,
I got it!

I got number !

Doug has the whole series!

You do?

Well, except for
issue number one.

Boys:
you got man o' steel man
number one!

Yep, just
came in.

Uh, how much is it?

Uh-uh, not for sale.

Not this baby.

Took me
ten years
to find.

It's
priceless.

Hmm, oh well.

You mean I can...

Touch it?

Yep.

Doug:
the rarestman o' steel man
in the world.

The only thing I really
wanted in my whole life

Right here in my own two hands.

I'd give anything to have it.

[ Footsteps]

[ Hinge creaks]

[ Barks]

That's me.

Hey!

[ Barks]

[ Yelps]

[ Barks]

I couldn't think
about anything

Butman o' steel man
number one.

Even if I found one,
I could never afford it.

What was the point?

There are only
copies in the world.

The chances of
finding another one

Are one in a zillion

No, a bajillion!

Hey, you
like comics?

The amazing... Man.

Oh, yeah, he's great.

Listen, I got a friend
with a whole bunch of comics

He's trying
to get rid of.

I don't know--
king quackey

Uncle grunty and
his barnyard g*ng

My little flouncy...

Keep looking, you'll
find something.

The super ginseng...

It was a miracle!

Man o' steel man number one

Just lying in a trunk like
an ordinary comic book.

I wondered if he knew...

Doug, they got that
priceless issue!

I guess this
one is okay.

[ Whispering]

That one might be worth
quite a few bills

Because it's
in a wrapper.

That thing is
worth a...

Doug:
usually, I'd
say you're right

But this copy
isn't in mint condition.

What do
you mean?

There's thumb marks
on the pages

And a rolled spine

And look at that
tear, right there.

But, doug,
that's...

[ Whispering]:
okay, do it.

He says, okay.

What's it
worth to you?

He says, you got
a deal, my man.

Pleasure doing
business with you.

Yay!

All right!

Here
he is,
superheros

The amazing boy who
collected my entire series!

Welcome.

There's no time
for congratulations.

My massive brain has just
detected a disturbance.

Hey, what the... !

Ahhh!

Ohhh!

Man o' steel man:
what thievery!

Only one man
could do this!

Your archnemesis
dr. Mastersnatcher--

Introduced in
issue number ?

You are an
amazing boy.

Quick, superheros,
we've no time to lose!

You're part
of the team now

Comic collector boy.

Follow me!

You want to stop
at sully's?

I want to
see his face

When I tell him...

Huh?

Cl-closed?

It's always
open saturdays!

Skeeter:
I wonder what's up.

Doug:
maybe mr. Sully
got sick or...

His man o' steel man
number one is gone!

No way it could
be the same one.

Stuff like this
happens, uh...

All the time.

Exactly what
I was thinking.

Let's not leap
to conclusions.

We still don't know
that anything hap...

Doug:
"rare comic book
collection shoplifted

From used book store"?

Oh, no!

He's snatching
everything in sight.

Faster, superheros,
we've got to stop him.

Wait!

Help!

Doug:
sully's book nook?

Oh, no!

He's taken...

Aah!

Man o' steel man,
what's wrong?

[ Weakly]:
this must be his hideous plan.

Yes, once he snatches every
comic book in the galaxy...

He'll have total control
of our superpowers.

[ Maniacal laughing]

Quick,
yo-yo girl.

It's useless, superjerks.

Now that I've got every issue
you couldn't harm a flea!

[ Weakly]:
help us... Comic
collector boy...

You must catch...
Dr. Mastersnatcher.

You must...

We tried to find the guys
who sold it to me, but...

What did they
look like, again?

They were high school
guys with sunglasses.

The store stayed closed
for over a week.

I knew if I talked to mr. Sully

He'd tell me my copy
wasn't the stolen one.

That it was just
some crazy coincidence.

[ Gasping]

Or maybe not.

Even if it was stolen,
I bought it fair and square.

I figured it'd be better

To ask my dad what to do.

Yes, son?

There's this kid

And he got a hold
of this... Thing

And later this kid
finds out that

Maybe this thing
he wanted

May be a bad thing.

Well, it's good-- really great

But it may be bad.

Uh-huh.

And whatever that thing is

Somebody else did the bad thing.

Which "thing"
are we talking about?

The most
important thing

And he bought it
fair and square.

Well, if it's
fair and square...

He should keep it?

Well, if it's
fair and square...

Dad, you're
the best!

Ya-hoo!

After my dad told me
I could keep it

I felt okay for a while.

What a cool dad!

He let you keep
something you stole?

Not stole, bought,
fair and square.

He said as long as
it was fair and square...

Skeeter:
hey, look, doug!

Sully's is open!

Isn't that great?

Boy:
oh, whose idea was this?

"Only one
kid under

Admitted
at a time"?

Th-th-that's
crazy!

Why did
he do that?

Because some
kid shoplifted

Mr. Sully's
comic books.

Yeah, and
ruined it
for all of us.

Somehow I knew

I couldn't just keep
running away from mr. Sully.

Uh, hi.

I'm, uh, sorry
about the robbery.

Yeah.

You know, I was
just wondering if...

Issue one of
man o' steel mangot stolen?

They all got lifted.

Either buy something or leave

So the next greedy kid
can come snoop around.

I'd never heard mr. Sully
talk about kids that way before

And I never saw
everybody this unhappy.

[ Evil snickering]

[ Weakly]:
can you see him,
comic collector boy?

No, it looks like dr.
Mastersnatcher has escaped.

[ Moaning]

Oh, no!

What's happening?

There's no hope,
comic collector boy.

Without the comic books,
we have no past...

And without a past...

We don't exist.

[ Sobbing]

But wait, comic
collector boy

Why aren't you
fading with us?

That's right.

You're a superhero, too.

He has issue
number one.

But I didn't steal it.

I bought it
fair and square.

We know.

Good-bye,
comic collector boy.

No!

It was time to do the hardest
thing I've ever done in my life.

[ Clearing throat]

[ Gasps]

Okay, where'd you get it?

I bought it from
two high school guys.

I didn't know
it was yours.

You believe me, don't you?

Eric, norman, get rid
of all these signs.

Mr. Sully was so happy

That he let every kid
in the store

And gave them all
a copy of thelumpy squad.

As for me...

I realized that having
the other issues

Of theamazing man o' steel man
was nothing to be ashamed of.

Do you have issue
number over there?

I have to see
what happens to menext.

By the way, thanks again
for giving up your powers

To revive us,
comic collector boy!

What was your name?

Call me doug.

Just doug.

Just be careful
with the cover.

Hey, who's that?

Maybe you should
introduce yourself.

Hmm, maybe later.

You're not
scared, are
you, doug?

No!

Oh, chicken!

Chicken!

[ Clucking]

Why don't you go
over there yourself?

[ Clucking]

All right.

I'll go over,
if you do.

Hi.

Hi, I'm
fun dougie.

Doug funnie.

Which is it?

Doug funnie,
what's yours?

Loretta laquigley.

You have an interesting
last name, doug funnie.

What country is
your family from?

I don't know.

Here, I guess.

How about you?

My family is
from yakkestonia.

Really? Wow!

We go to the
family estate

To ski with
my aunt marlene.

She's a famous
actress--

Marlene laflamme?

Have you ever
skied there?

Well, no, is it fun?

You must come
and try it.

It's not as far
as you'd think--

Especially in
aunt marlene's jet.

What's your
friend's name?

This is,
skeeter.

Ocean
preeyottna.

That means "pleased
to meet you."

Yakkestonesian is
a marvelous language.

I speak it
all the time.

Well, got to go

Dova stretchy!

Donut retchy?

Wow, she's pretty cool,
huh, skeet?

Skeet?

[ Swooning]

Skeet?

[ Footsteps]

[ Hinge creaks]

[ Barks]

That's me.

Hey!

[ Barks]

[ Yelps]

[ Moaning]

Hey, skeeter,
skeeter!

So skeeter finally
had a crush on someone.

He'd fallen
for loretta laquigley-- hard.

Skeeter has gone kapooey?

He's not moving!

There is an old
yakkestonesian
folk remedy for this.

Hold his nose, please.

Ocean preeyottna
to you, too.

Whoa, where'd she go?

Hey, doug, isn't
loretta the greatest?

Well, see you
in class.

[ Honking]

What is happened to him?

Loretta laquigley happened.

Yes, I have
met her--

The girl who pretends
to speak yakkestonesian.

Wait a minute...

You mean she doesn't
speak yakkestonesian?

She can say,
"hello, how are you?

I am very rich,"
a few other things

But that is all.

Wow, could loretta
have been lying to us?

So, ms. Laquigley

You say you spend a lot
of time in yakkestonia.

You must parlezthe
lingo pretty smooth?

Yes, I do.

Ah, tih pyosh
tazhmonnooyoo zheedkost?

Yes, I'd love to.

You just agreed that
you drink transmission fluid.

Oh, I didn't
understand your accent.

I thought you were
asking me to dinner.

Oh, yeah, sister?

It just so happens

Fentruck says you don't speak
yakkestonesian for beans.

You don't speak
yakkestonesian for beans.

He's a liar!

He's jealous of my rich family!

Always has been!

Smooth, real smooth.

Give me
one good reason

Why I should believe
anything you say.

Because I'd never think of
lying to someone as strong

And handsome as you.

And besides your best friend
is nuts about me.

She was a cool one,
but the more loretta talked

The more I suspected
it was all lies.

...in yakkestonia.

Everybody rides horses
in yakkestonia.

Tell me more.

Oh, brother.

My father even
wrote a novel
about my horse.

Did I tell you my
father was a novelist?

Yeah, a novelist
and a champion surfer.

I thought he was
a horse farmer.

We surf in zembla.

They have
the biggest waves

But I'm sure
you know that.

Skeeter ate it up!

Who wants to go
to a movie?

I do, I do!

Great, it stars my
aunt, marlene laflamme.

Oh, sh**t, I've
forgotten my purse.

Don't worry.

I've got money.

You're sweet, I'll
pay you back later.

Loretta was taking skeeter
for a ride

And I could see just
where it was leading.

It's fabulous,
sensational!

These were
made for you!

I love them,
I'll take them.

Oh, skeeter, darling?

Uh-huh?

I really love these.

The skis?

No, silly,
these mountains.

Loretta,
after the movie

The clothes,
the restaurant

I don't have
any money.

Oh, okay, I guess
I can just go skiing

On somebody else's mountain.

Oh, loretta,
don't cry.

And I was going to
call it mt. Skeeter.

If I sold
everything I own

And get my parents
to sell our house

And get a job on
weekends or something...

Oh, skeeter,
you're a sweetie!

Oh, such a sweetie,
oh, such a cutie!

I tried to think of some way

I could stop loretta from
taking advantage of skeeter.

Mr. Dink:
nice weather
today, huh?

Electronic voice:
lying, lying.

Mr. Dink:
what do you know?
It works!

New machine,
mr. Dink?

The truth-o-matic industrial-
strength lie detector.

I got a great deal on it.

Lying, lying, lying,
lying, lying.

Okay, so it
was very expensive.

Douglas, you look
pretty down in the mouth.

Anything you want
to talk about?

Let's say you had a friend

And someone lied
to this friend

And your friend
believed it.

I lied about
being captain

Of my high school
football team.

I was just the
equipment manager.

What?

Oh, no, mr. Dink,
it's okay.

I forgive you, really.

Oh, oh, thank
you, douglas.

I feel as though
a burden

Has been lifted
from me.

I'll never lie to anyone
ever, ever again!

Lying, lying, lying, lying.

Wow, mr. Dink felt so guilty
about lying to me

He admitted the whole thing.

Maybe if loretta
got caught in a lie

She'd admit everything
to skeeter.

This is my house.

See you guys.

[ Sighing:]
yeah... See you.

My mother said

You should see
a lady to her door.

I'll be okay,
you guys go on.

Maybe her mansion
is messy.

Don't be a
chump, valentine.

[ Grunting]

Explain that, miss yakkestonia!

Oh, skeeter,
he's right!

I've been
lying to you!

I don't really speak
yakkestonesian.

I'm a... A...
Con artist!

A con artist?

I make boys fall
in love with me

And then take them
for all they've got!

I'll just... Go now.

Oh, sh**t.

I forgot my purse.

Do you have
money for a taxi?

Take a hike.

So all I have to do is corner
loretta when she's with skeeter

On monday after school.

[ Phone rings]

Hello?

Just calling
to say so long.

So long?

Where are you?

The mall, loretta is just
buying a new ski outfit

Then it's dova stretchy,
bluffington

Hello, yakkestonia!

Loretta:
what do you
think of this?

How much is it?

You can't give her any money!

Her aunt marlene
will pay me back.

Skeeter!

I'll see you
when I get back.

I had to get to the mall-- fast!

Whoa!

[ Crashing]

No, skeeter, stop!

Doug, what are
you doing here?

I can't let
you buy this.

Loretta is not
what she seems.

Loretta:
what a surprise.

Is something up?

You know perfectly
well what's up!

What are you
talking about?

I don't want to
have to do this

But you've given
me no choice.

I know you've
been lying.

L-lying, what do you mean?

Well, you don't
speak yakkestonesian.

Fentruck said so.

You don't?

Well... No,
well, I mean...

I just know a few phrases
like "how are you"

And "I am very rich."

Why would you lie
about something like that?

It's just... I really
like you, skeeter

And I was scared

You wouldn't
think I was cool.

Well, I think
you're cool anyway.

You do?

Course I do!

You're the greatest!

I better pay for
these ski clothes

Skeeter, wake up!

There isn't going
to be any ski trip!

It's all a bunch of lies!

But...

There is no

Aunt marlene!

Aunt marlene!

Ah, loretta, darling.

There you are.

Is this your
little friend?

He's cute!

We'd better
get cracking.

I told my pilot
to be ready at : .

Ready, skeeter?

Yeah, let's go!

Bye, doug!

See you,
doug.

[ Honking]

See you.

Dear journal, I learned
an important lesson today:

Never judge someone too quickly.

Even if they don't
speak yakkestonesian

They might be speaking the truth
about everything else.

I'm making a promise
here and now.

I'll never, ever
judge anybody again.

Lying, lying, lying,
lying, lying.