04x13 - Boyz II Men

[bunniefuu]

Hey, guys.

Danny, where have you been?

The show's about to start.

My dad was supposed to give me a ride here,

but he flaked on me.

I had to walk miles to get here.

Wow. That's harsh.

Yeah.

My feet are k*lling me!

Ah, that's better.

[scary music]

Oh--

Oh, come on, don't become unconscious.

My feet can't possibly smell that bad.

Uh, Danny, have you seen my--

[scary music]

Neon, come on.

All right, you guys are just playing with me, right?

There's no way my feet smell that bad.

Five minutes.

Five--

[scary music]

This is crazy!

I'm calling my mother.

Danny's mother.

M-- mom?

It's me.

Danny?

I thought I told you never to call me.

But mom!

[scary music]

What is that smell?

Hello?

Mom?

Mommy?

Hello?

This is ridiculous.

I know who I'll ask.

Hey-- hey, camera guy?

[scary music]

--some money-- Oh my word!

[screaming]

Hey-- hey, audience?

Tell me the truth.

Do my feet smell that--

[groaning]

Okay, I'll wash 'em!

Good.

Do that.

NARRATOR: Fresh out the box.

Stop, look, and watch.

Ready yet?

Get set.

It's All That!

THEME SONG: Oh, oh, oh.

This is All That.

This is All That.

Now this is just an introduction before I blow your mind.

The show is all of that, and yes we do it all the time.

So sit your booty on the floor, or in a chair, or ground,

or anywhere, just don't go nowhere.

'Cause everything we do is all of that.

When entertaining you we all of that.

My posse and my crew is all of that.

So sit still, 'cause we're coming right back.

Oh, oh, oh.

This is All That.

This is All That.

Check it out.

Oh, oh, oh, this is All That.

This is All That.

Ah.

There.

OK, I'm ready.

Ed, there is no way that you can

drink an entire Terrible Good Gulp in under seconds.

Oh yeah?

Behold.

OK.

Go!

GROUP: Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed,

Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed, Ed--

Nine seconds!

He did it!

Yeah!

I am the king of liquids.

[belches]

[car honks]

Oh, someone's at the drive-through.

Back to work.

Yeah, cool, yeah.

Cool, g*ng.

Hi!

I'd like a Good Burger, please.

Um-- um, you're going to have to wait.

I have to tinkle.

Eww!

Um-- um-- uh--

Judy!

Help me.

Could you cover for me?

I really got to tinkle.

No, Ed.

The bathroom is out of order.

OK.

That's OK.

I'll just clean it up.

Uh-uh.

You're going to have to wait until the plumber gets here

this afternoon.

Uh, come on, Judy!

But I'm all full of tinkle!

Just gonna have to wait.

Oh, OK. OK.

All right.

Um-- um-- Welcome to Good Burger,

home of the Good Burger.

Can I take your order?

Yeah.

I told you, I want a Good Burger.

OK, uh, where do you live?

About six blocks from here.

Why?

Uh, do you have a bathroom at your house?

Well, uh, yeah.

I--

Can I come over?!

No!

Ugh!

You're disturbing.

OK, OK, just don't think about tinkling.

Don't think about tinkling, OK?

Hello, I'm Connie Muldoon!

OK, what do you want, Connie?

Well, I have a medium Good Soda here--

which had plenty for me I drink-- but we Muldoons like

to drink out of large cups.

May I have a larger cup?

Yeah, O-- OK.

OK, here you go.

Thank you.

I'll transfer it now.

OK. Wait!

You don't have to do that right now!

Oh!

Oh!

Oh!

Ah!

There, I've completed the transfer.

Toodaloo!

ED: OK.

Hi, my name is Perry.

Somebody called a plumber?

Yes!

Yes!

Oh-- oh-- Hey, dude.

Oh, now go-- go fix the bathroom, OK, Barry?

No, no, Perry.

Huh?

No, see you called me Barry and my name is Perry.

It starts with a P. I'm Perry the plumber.

That's two Ps, get it?

PP.

Got it, got it.

PP.

No!

Oh look, a plunger.

That starts with a P too.

No!

Hey, hey, you!

Come over here!

ED: What!

What?

What?

I'll tell you what.

Look at my Good Burger sandwich.

It's covered with nickels!

OK.

Barney Scott nickels!

Lichten, you wanted nickels on your sandwich.

No!

I said pickles!

Pickles!

Pickles with a P!

- No! - P!

- No! - P!

No!

Yes!

No!

Pickles with a P!

No!

- A P! - No!

A P!

- No! - Yes!

No!

NARRATOR: And now Lori Beth Denberg

with more Vital Information for you everyday life.

If you get all Ds on your report card, don't feel bad.

It's not your fault you're stupid.

It's fun to change your mind.

It's not fun to change an elephant's diapers.

A cow says moo, a duck says quack, and a boy with no tongue

says

[gagging]

NARRATOR: This has been Lori Beth

Denberg with Vital Information.

THEME SONG: This is All That.

This is All That.

[SHOUTING] I'm a librarian, and I'm hungry!

I'm gonna fry up some bacon!

There you go, bacon, fry!

Fry, my strips of pork!

Fry faster!

Hurry!

Why are you taking so long?

Ah, forget it!

E-- excuse me, Mrs. Hushbaum.

You really shouldn't--

[air horn blows]

Hey, quiet!

This is a library, not a talk-a-torium!

But Mrs. Hushbaum--

[whistle blows]

What's the deal-io?

Can't you read?

What does that sign say?

It says quiet.

Hush!

You're still talking!

Didn't you learn anything from reading that sign?

Now, what does that sign say?

I said, tell me what that sign says!

It says qu- qu- quiet.

[air horn blows]

That does it!

Out!

Out of the library!

I've never seen such a blatant disregard for signage in all

my librarian years!

Boy, is she loud.

She's a dang hypocrite.

[inaudible] Haven't you been watching the sketch?

Quiet!

This is a library!

[sheep baaing]

Come on, sheep, follow the librarian.

Sheep?

Hush!

If you can't be silent, then I will be violent!

Come on!

Goodbye, sheep, and quiet!

[sheep baa]

[mystic music]

[shouting]

Quiet!

[dramatic music]

[shouts]

I said quiet!

Didn't hurt!

[shouts]

[shouts]

This is a library!

[shouts]

Some master you are!

Black belt by librarian butt!

The karate man looks hurt.

Should I call ambulance?

[air horn blows]

Quiet!

That means hush!

Shh, no talking!

And for our Spanish-speaking friends, silencio!

It's almost time!

, , , , , , .

Happy New Year!

[noise makers]

What are you doing?

It's not the New Year's.

[noise maker blows]

Quiet!

If you can't be quiet, then I'll have to ask you to leave!

I've got two turntables and a microphone!

Let's get this party started!

[hip-hop music]

Everybody say ho!

GROUP: Ho!

Quiet!

Say ho!

GROUP: Ho!

Quiet!

Say ho!

GROUP: Ho!

Quiet!

THEME SONG: This is All That.

This is All That.

NARRATOR: Hey, everybody!

It's time for the game show What Do You Do?

And now here's your lovely hostess, Winter Wonder!

Hiya, people!

I'm Winter Wonders and this is What Do You Do?

Where our panelists try to figure out what some kid does.

Now, today's panelists are Connie Muldoon, Detective Dan,

Lump Maroon, and Lester Oaks.

Hold-- hold-- hold-- hold your fig newtrons there,

mush bucket.

The name is Lester Oaks Construction Worker.

See, I've been into constriction ever since I was knee-high--

Jupiter!

Hey, hey, hey!

Hold on there, Georgia girl.

Why'd you holler a Jupiter in my ear listener, huh?

Tell me that one.

Tell me that one, huh?

Jupiter!

Oh, you've done it again.

Hello, I'm Connie Muldoon.

And frankly, I don't know what that young man

keeps saying Jupiter.

We Muldoons don't believe in the solar system.

I'm Detective Dan.

OK!

Now, bring out our first contestant, Megan Murples.

Hello there, Ms. Wonders.

Hello, panelists, audience.

Hi, Megan.

Now, Megan, if none of the panelists

can guess what Megan does, then Megan

wins this color television set.

Oh, what do you think of that, Megan?

Well, I would enjoy having it.

Yeah, wouldn't ya?

Now, tell the audience what Megan does.

NARRATOR: Megan slaps herself with liver.

OK.

Now, our first guess goes to Connie Muldoon.

Connie?

Megan, as Connie Muldoon, I would

like to know if what you do has anything

to do with a rhinoceros, circus freaks, or wheat toast?

No.

Oh, fiddlesticks.

[siren blares]

Whoops!

Connie snapped her fingers.

That was a secret signal.

Why, a secret signal?

What does that mean for Connie Muldoon?

It means you're going to be att*cked

by Zuzu, the infected elf.

Zuzu?

Oh!

I've been elfed!

Detective Dan, your turn.

Don't talk to me!

Alrighty.

Our next guest is--

Jupiter!

[buzzer]

Jupiter!

[buzzer]

Jupiter!

[buzzer]

Jupiter!

[buzzer]

That'll do!

All right, Lester Oaks, you're up.

Dandy.

Uh, now, Megan, let me ask you this one question.

Does what you do have anything to do with, um--

Oh, I can't think of nothing.

[buzzer]

Whoops!

Wrong answer.

Trap door.

T-- t-- trap door?

What-- what do you mean by t-- trap door?

What you about to do to Lester Oaks Construction--

Ow!

[yelling]

[water splashing]

OK, Detective Dan, what is your guess?

I'm Detective Dan.

Yes, you are.

Now, who's turn is it again?

It would be your turn.

In that case, I better take off my pants!

I feel all free and breezy.

OK.

Let's go to Lump.

Jupiter.

Stop saying that!

Jupiter-- You big jerk!

[smooching]

OK, Megan, it looks like nobody guessed what you do,

so you win the color TV!

Yes!

Yay!

Yippie yay ki yay ki yo!

Yippie yi ki yay!

What does she do?

Connie Muldoon demands to know!

OK.

Tell them, Megan.

I slap myself with liver.

Let's show the audience, OK, Megan?

Very well.

This-- this is what I do.

Hey, that girl's assaulting a liver!

Boys, destroy her television set!

NARRATOR: Tune in next time for more What Do You Do?

We all of that.

My posse and my crew.

Is all of that.

So sit still, 'cause we're coming right back.

Oh, oh, oh.

This is All That.

This is All That.

Check it out.

Oh, oh, oh.

This is All That.

This is All That.

MAVIS: Hey, Clavis!

Wake up, the show's over.

CLAVIS: Oh, yeah.

Kick it!