02x08 - Boyhood's End pt. 2

[bunniefuu]

♪ [EERIE MUSIC]

[TYPING ON KEYS]

-Where on Earth is Carmen Sandiego?

♪ [DRAMATIC MUSIC]

♪ WHERE IS CARMEN SANDIEGO?

♪ CARMEN SANDIEGO

♪ WHERE ON EARTH CAN SHE BE?

♪ TELL ME WHERE IS CARMEN SANDIEGO? ♪

♪ CARMEN SANDIEGO

♪ WHERE ON EARTH CAN SHE BE?

♪ WHERE ON EARTH CAN SHE BE?

♪ OOOH

♪ SPHINX, MONA LISA...

♪ LEANING TOWER OF PISA...

♪ LONDON ZOO, TIMBUKTU

♪ CAN'T YOU HELP US FIND A CLUE ♪

♪ WHERE IS CARMEN SANDIEGO?

♪ CARMEN SANDIEGO

♪ WHERE ON EARTH CAN SHE BE?

♪ WHERE ON EARTH CAN SHE BE?

-Ivy!

[IMPACT GRANT] Heeelp!

CHIEF: In our last exciting episode,

hot sh*t Acme Ace Lee Jordan,

came to Zack and Ivy's rescue!

...on special assignment to work out a strange

computer malfunction at the Pentagon.

So, Ivy got herself a new partner.

-With me so far? I'm not. Okay...

-But then, Lee's obsession with catching Carmen

became more than Ivy had bargained for.

-Lee?

-And when Zack showed up again...

Lee locked our two heroes

in an underground tunnel in Delphi, Greece,

so he could face Carmen mano-a-mano,

one-on-one, man-to-Carmen!

-We meet again, Lee Jordan.

-Ahhh!

[GRUNT] I gotcha.

-No, detective. I got you.

[CHUCKLE]

-And so, we now join this strange case,

which is already in progress.

-I've done what no other detective

has ever been able to do.

And I've done it twice!

-Great minds have always needed challenges...

Picasso, Alexander the Great.

What's left if you've caught the greatest thief

of all time?

-I didn't come all this way to arrest you, Carmen!

I came to join you.

-I knew you'd be the one who would see

the challenges in planning the world's ultimate thefts.

-I see more than that, Carmen.

-A lot more!

[STRAINING]

-Ivy, she's getting away!

-Hurry Zack!!

-Whoaaaa! Ivy!!

[YELLING] Hang on, little bro!

-Like I have a choice!?

-Say hello to your newest nemesis, detectives.

[MANIACAL LAUGH] Me!

-Lee, noooo!

-Ahhhhhh!

-Don't you ever try anything like that again!

-They were practically in here.

I didn't have any choice.

-There are always choices...

when you use your brains and not your brawn.

-Huh?

-Lee Jordan! I'll get you!

[SPEAKING GREEK]

-Chief, we've got big problems...

Carmen showed up and Lee went off on his own and--...

-Sheesh! What ever happened to hello?

I'm a person, too, you know. Kind of.

-I've got feelings.

It's always, "call the Chief, we've got problems."

Do you ever call just to say "hello"?

-Invite me out for a cappuccino?

A scone? A game of twister?

-Lee went over to Carmen's team!

He joined VILE.

-Help! Wait! Wait! Wait!

[VOICE BREAKING UP] I'm... I'm... picking...

someone's into... someone's into the system...

Oh, that tickles!

-I'll see you rot behind bars if it's

the last thing I ever do, Lee Jordan!

-Well, then, Ivy...

...here's a clue to what we'll be doing.

-These keys are in a coat, detectives.

But they won't open a lock.

-Player...

...Info-Scan keys. Looking for ones that won't open a lock.

ZACK: Cool. A mon-key won't open a lock.

[CHUCKLES] Get it, Ivy? Amon-key?

-Pu-leez, Zack.

IVY: Fresh from the Gulf of Mexico!

It's the Florida Keys!

-Right! Keys like that are low offshore islands

sometimes made of coral reefs.

-And there are over eight hundred Florida Keys altogether

Carmen could be headed for any one!

-Ah, they could take months to search.

-It's got to be a key-key.

A key-key in a coat.

-But what kind of coat? A coat of paint,

a coat of chain mail, a coat of arms, a fur coat, a--...

-Freeze frame!

-Zack! There's a key that won't open a lock because...

...it's in a coat of arms!

-A coat of arms is a symbol passed from generation

to generation representing countries,

kings and veddy important families.

Hey, hey, hey!

-Player, cross-match to see if these exact keys

belong in some coat of arms.

-Bingo! These keys just unlocked our clue, Zack!

-Yeah! That's the coat of arms for the Vatican City!

-Player, C-Five us to the scene of Carmen's next crime.

-All aboard!

The C-Five express is leaving Delphi, Greece

for Vatican City!

-Andiamo! We're off to the Vatican,

which is the smallest independent country

in the world.

But home of the world's largest Christian church,

Saint Peter's Basilica.

-That's right, it's small but mighty.

It's the Vatican, home of the Pope.

But wait, there's more.

-The Vatican comes with all these accessories...

It's own money, it's own stamps, it's own radio station,

Vatican DJ's included, and much, much more!

-Don't delay! Call today Dial Five-five-fivePope!

Wow! After all, Vatican City is his home.

-Cool! Look, it's the Sistine Chapel!

Ah, Michelangelo. The greatest artistic genius

of the Renaissance Period spent four long years

hand-painting the ceiling, which is feet long

We're talking longer than a basketball court!

Harder to dribble on.

[GRUNTS]

-Rumour has it that Michelangelo also designed

the famous uniforms of the Swiss Guard,

who today still head up Vatican Security!

Next stop, The Vatican!

-Great! There's a few of the Swiss Guards now!

You speak, Swiss, right?

-There is no such language, sis.

People in Switzerland speak everything from French to

German, to Italian, to Romansch and--...

-Hello.

-Even English.

-Plan A.. Prove to Carmen I'm indispensable to--

[FOOTSTEPS APPROACH] -Huh!?

-Ready Lee?

-Why are we going to steal some

four hundred year old book anyway, Carmen?

-This particular copy of Dante's Divine Comedy

is a classic;

-It was illustrated and handpainted

by the artist, Botticelli.

-Yeah, but four hundred year old coins

or jewels would be worth a lot more.

-The worth is in the craftsmanship.

Work with me and you'll learn the same applies

to the perfect heist.

Yeah, sure. Let's go.

-This is a cool spot, Ivy.

I can see all of Rome from here.

-She could show any time...

-Hey, there's the Roman Coliseum!

It looks exactly like my post card!

-Zack, get with the program. We're on a stakeout,

not a sightseeing trip.

-A plane's entering our security perimeter from the southwest!

-Oh man! We must have mixed up the clue!

-Carmen and Lee just parachuted out at the Coliseum.

-Zack! Over near the Vittorio...

-And there's two more going down

into the Castle SantAngelo.

-She must be sending decoys all over Rome!

-So, where's the real Carmen!?

-Dear Zack and Ivy, wish you were here.

[LAUGHS]

-Hm... Funny, this smudge isn't coming off...

-Neat, Ivy. It's the same room, look!

-Yeah, and look at this!

-How could a whole room have a thumb-print?

-Come on, Zack! She's in!

-Very good. Now put it back.

-What!? But why!?

-You passed my first test.

-You were just testing me with this whole job?

-We've accomplished what we set out to do.

Now put it back!

-We set out to steal Dante's Divine Comedy

and I'm keeping it! It's gotta be worth a fortune!

-Put it back, Lee!!

[ALARM RINGS]

You now have exactly two minutes to get out.

[GASPS]

-When you work with me, you do things my way.

-I think your library card just expired, Lee!

-I think you're wrong.

-Whoaaaa! [IMPACT GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS]

-Oh, come on!

-Here's a penny.

Buy yourself a clue, detectives.

-So, you're Carmen's errand boy now.

-Delivering clues and covering for her escapes, huh Ace??

-Hey, I deliver my own clues,

and that penny's only one part of it!

You'll have to earn the other part

if you want to catch me in the biggest crime of the century.

I'll show Carmen I don't need to be tested!

-Leee! Nooo!

-Ahhhh!

-Move it, Zack!

-Ah... [IMPACT GRUNT]

-Zack!

-Huh?

[PANICKED ITALIAN]

-HE REALLY BOILS MY PASTA!

He quits Acme, becomes Carmen's protege,

...robs the Vatican... [FRUSTRATED GROWL]

-Yeah, and he makes far too much noise

in a library, too.

-Authorities now report that

in the last forty-eight hours...

...valuable gems were stolen from

the Smithsonian Institution.

-Plus in Athens, Greece, the days ticket sales

from the Museum turned up missing from the...

...National Archaeological Museum.

[SIGH] Lee.

-I am not training him so he can work for himself.

-We're sunk, Ivy. Our only clue is this penny.

We've x-rayed it, tested it--...

CHIEF: Hot tip from Crime Net, detectives.

Lee Jordan's just been ID'd

at the National Swiss Bank in Geneva.

Well, what are you waiting for... a bus!?

-Player...

...C-Five us outta here!

This goombah's gain' down!

-Whoaaa!

CHIEF: Yodel-lay-hee-who?

You're on your way from San Francisco, California

to Geneva, Switzerland.

[COUGHING]

-Hurry, Zack!

-Ugh! Got you now, Lee!

-It's about time you caught up with me.

Too bad you can't reel me in, detectives!

[ENGINE REVS]

-Whoa!

-Hang on, little bro!

-Whoaaaa!

-Whew!

-You're a day late and a dollar short, gumshoes.

But you got heart.

Here's part two of my big clue.

[LAUGHTER]

-A chocolate mint coin?

-I hate mint.

-Hmm...

[BEEPING]

-Access denied, code invalidated.

-Carmen!

-Carmen left orders not to let you in anymore.

-She can't cut me out!

[GUARDS SCREAM]

-Code Red, Lee Jordan's on his way up.

What do you think you're doing, locking me out?

We're partners!

-Wrong, Lee. We're through. You failed.

-Failed!

I've proven I can steal anything, anywhere, any time!

-By turning your back on my most basic principles.

-Oh, get off it, Carmen! You're nothing but a thief yourself.

Just because you pretend it's all a game

doesn't make it any better than what I'm doing.

Face it, we're the same, you and me.

Daring everyone to try and stop us.

-You see, the only difference is,

I'm not as easily satisfied as you.

Your rules bore me, Carmen. You want the game to be over?

Then it's over.

I gave Zack and Ivy two clues to my own master crime

and they won't even come close to catching me.

I'm the best in the world.

And you are history, Carmen Sandiego!

[SLAMS DOOR]

-If I'm history, Lee Jordan...

...then it seems like history is about to be rewritten.

-We've been at this for hours, Ivy:

-We've cross-checked chocolate and copper,

Lincoln and the Swiss Alps.

-What can Lee be up?

-Look, Ivy! A hot tip from Carmen!?

"Leave San Francisco and don't go to Denver"?

-What does San Francisco and Denver

have to do with the coin clue?

-Player, cross-reference those cities

with info on coins. And hurry!

♪ Oh the money in the mint goes ching ching ching! ♪

♪ Everybody sing!

-Ivy, look! San Francisco, California and Denver, Colorado

both have United States mints!

-Lee's clue wasn't a candy mint.

He meant a mint where they made coins!

CHIEF: And check it out, gumshoes.

The U.S. mints combined

make over seventy million coins a day!

We're talking seven million of which are quarters!

That's enough to play...

oh, ten video games a day

for one thousand nine hundred seventeen years!

Or three loads of my laundry.

-Zack, look! That coin has an "S" on it.

-Which means it was minted in San Francisco.

And if it has a "D," it was minted in Denver.

-But what if it doesn't have an "S" or a "D,"

like the penny Lee gave us?

-That means it was pressed at the only mint

in the U.S. that has no...

...mint mark on the penny,

the one in The City of Brotherly Love,

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

-Player, C-Five us outta here!

We're about to smash Lee's piggy bank pig time!

[DISTANT SIREN]

[SPARKS FLY]

-Blast off.

-Check it out, Ivy!

There must be enough coins in here to fill

a billion piggy banks!

-Zack! This is exactly what Lee would be after.

We better take a look around for ourselves.

[EARTH RUMBLES]

Whoaaa!

-It must be Lee trying to rob the mint!

[LEE GRUNTS]

-You made a big mistake, Lee.

-And you made an even bigger mistake coming here.

[STRAINING]

-Even you couldn't steal the entire U.S. Mint, Carmen.

-I wouldn never have wanted to.

-You've got nowhere to go, Lee

The place is surrounded by police.

-But I've got the one thing

you've always wanted, detectives.

Do what I say, and she's yours.

Fill it with all the bags it'll hold!

[GASPS]

-Hurry!

-Zack, the ingots are...

...solid gold. We could weigh him down

faster than with the coins.

-If I were Lee, I'd go for the gold ingots.

He can get more on board and...

...they're worth more.

-Ah, good thinkin', Zack.

Fill the vehicle with the ingots instead.

-Yes, very good thinking indeed, Zack.

[ENGINE STRUGGLES]

-Now, back away.

-Fair exchange, I'd say!

-Now let's stop Mr. Wonder Glove!

[TIRES SCREECH & SIRENS BLARE]

[GRUNTS]

-Acme Detectives! We need your cycle!

-C'mon! C'mon!!

-Give it up, Geekwad!

[GRUNTS]

-Whoaaa!

-You're busted, loser!

And I'm going to love sending you away for good!

-Bravo, detectives.

Just wanted to stay long enough

to see you make the world safe for thieves like me, again.

-Ivy, she's getting away!

-Well, you win some you lose some, detectives.

-Right. Today, a creep like you, Lee.

-Tomorrow, a crook with class, like Carmen Sandiego!

-Meaning what, Carmen?