♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
♪ In living color♪
- ♪ In living color♪
- ♪ You know what I'm sayin'♪
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
♪ In living color♪
♪ In living color♪
♪ You can walk on the moon
Float like a balloon ♪
♪ It's never too late
and it's never too soon ♪
♪ Take it from me
It's a'ight to be ♪
♪ In living color♪
♪ How would you feel knowing
prejudice was obsolete ♪
♪ And all mankind danced
to the exact beat ♪
♪ And at night it was safe
to walk down the street ♪
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
♪ In living color♪
♪ In living color♪
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
♪ In living color♪
♪ In living color♪
♪ Everybody here is equally kind ♪
♪ In living color♪
♪ What's mine is yours
and what's yours is mine ♪
♪ In living color♪
♪ How would you feel knowing
everybody was your friend ♪
♪ From thin to thick
and through thick and thin ♪
♪ And egotistical trips
was put to an end ♪
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
♪ In living color♪
♪ In living color♪
♪ You can walk on the moon
Float like a balloon ♪
♪ It's never too late
and it's never too soon ♪
♪ Take it from me
It's a'ight to be ♪
♪ In living color♪
♪ How would you feel knowing
prejudice was obsolete ♪
♪ And all mankind danced
to the exact beat ♪
♪ And at night it was safe
to walk down the street ♪
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
♪ In living color♪♪
Ladies and gentlemen,
Keenen Ivory Wayans.
[Audience Applauding,
Cheering]
Yo!
Thank you.
Welcome to In Living Color.
I'm Keenen Ivory Wayans.
- [Audience Cheering, Applauding]
- Yeah!
We got a great show
for you tonight.
As usual, I like to start the show
by introducing my Fly Girls.
Starting over here with Michelle,
Cari, Carrie Ann, Lisa and Deidre.
- [Audience Cheering]
- [Keenen] Yeah.! Give it up.!
And to my D.J., S.W. On...
Whoo, whoo, whoo.
- Who are you, man?
- Barry.
Yo, Shawn said it was cool.
Shawn!
Yo, Keen, he's stupid!
Wait. Stop, stop, stop.
What's up with D.J. Extra Large here?
He's stupid, man. He gave us Laker
tickets if he could D.J. For the show.
So we goin' to the Laker game tonight.
[Laughing]
We'll be back in a minute.
Let me talk to you.
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
♪ In living color♪
♪ In living color♪♪
This summer,
Touchtone Pictures...
is proud to present the sequel
all America has been waiting for...
Yeah, hello.
Is this Buster Douglas?
Yeah, well, don't worry
about who it is.
Yeah. It's a "unanimous" caller.
I'm just a fan who's a little concerned
about your career right now.
I saw the fight you had with Mike Tyson.
You beat him pretty bad.
You know, I think
you should fight him again.
Yeah, like tomorrow.
What?
All right, so it's me.
Yeah, so what?
How'd you know?
I disguised my voice.
Look, come on, Buster.
You gonna fight me or what?
Aw, please?
Come on, it's not goin' too good
with the broads, man.
Well, just loan me the belt
for the weekend.
Okay, fine. I'm givin' Robin's mother
your number.
Oh, quiet. I could still
whip the both of ya.
'Cause I'm the greatest
of all times!
Float like a butterfly...
sting like a tree... no.
Bee. No, that ain't it.
Float like a, uh...
Uh, Muhammad, I believe it's,
"Float like a butterfly...
sting like a bee."
Oh, yeah. Yeah, thanks, Sugar.
That's right.
Float like a Butterfinger,
stink like a bean. Yeah.
- [Doorbell Rings]
- Oh!
Round eight.
Rope-a-dope.
Pretty funny, Ali.
- [Doorbell Rings]
- [Tyson] I'll get the door.
Round over.
Oh, wow.
It's a baby!
Who ordered the baby?
Did it come with pepperoni?
- Hey.
- [Baby Cooing]
Wait a minute.
Whose baby is this?
Well, he's about your size, Sugar.
- Yeah, but it talks like you...
- [Squawking, Cooing]
And it makes faces like Ali.
There's a note.
Let's read it.
Let's see what this note says.
I don't know. You?
I can't read it.
Uh, " Dear Champ, remember
your New Year's Eve party?
Well, here's your baby."
Well, as you can see,
it said "Champ."
That could be any one of us.
We were all at that party,
you know.
Well, i-it's signed "Judy."
- [All] Ohh! Judy!
- Yeah.
Well, maybe we should
take turns with the baby too.
[Baby Crying]
U-Uh, I think he's hungry!
- What we gonna do with the baby?
- Give him a bottle.
Somethin' for the baby.
All right, little baby, swish it around
in your mouth and spit it out.
Or else you'll get cramps.
Yeah, all right, Champ,
come on.
Swish it around. Swish.
Now spit!
There you go.
There you go.
- [Crying Continues]
- He's still cryin'.
Uh, maybe we should
change his diaper or somethin'.
Let's try that.
Oh, wow! Looks like the little fella
had a pretty bad accident.
No, Michael, it's a girl.
Ohh!
- That's it.
- I'll handle this.
Come on, little girl.
It's the Sugar. Look close now.
In all your life, you'll never lay eyes
on a more beautiful man.
[Crying Continues]
That was pretty funny.
Oh, wait.
We gotta finish this.
Um, get some powder.
I hear babies can get rashes.
D-Did you say somethin'
about roaches?
I don't want this baby
livin' with roaches.
Hi. It's me, Muhammad Ali.
Z-Con Roach Spray,
the most powerful spray in the world.
- I said "rashes," not "roaches," Ali.
- Oh.
Come on, guys, do somethin'.
She's cryin'.
What should we do?
Do that impression you do
ofTommy Hearns.
Okay, baby, this is an impression
ofTommy Hearns...
in the last round of our first fight.
She liked that!
She liked it!
Looks like she liked it.
All right, let's sing her to sleep.
Ready? Hit it, guys.
♪♪ [Ali, Sugar Vocalizing]
♪♪ [Singing]
[Announcer]
Three Champs and a Baby.
This time the unanimous decision...
is comedy.!
- ♪♪ [Drums]
- [Elephant Trumpets]
[All Murmuring]
Greetings.
I'm Margaret Linsford-Hall,
and this is my interpreter Mr. Mbutu.
[Interpreting In Naganawanese]
...Margaret Linsford-Hall...
bung-tanga-ndosilleh.!
President Bush has seen fit
to appoint me ambassador...
to your little nation...
rather than sending me to Majorca,
as I had expected.
[Translating]
I didn't know what to expect, based on
the briefing I received in Washington...
but I find your little country
really rather quaint...
in a Third World sort of way.
[Chattering, Laughing]
Uh, we have much
to offer your country...
in terms of agricultural assistance
and hunger relief.
[Murmuring, Groaning]
L-I'm very sorry that
I don't speak your language...
but Mr. Mbutu has been so kind
as to teach me a phrase to close with.
Um...
[Speaking Naganawanese]
Jum bakoo, bare booty...
cum bwee-bwee...
[Clicks Tongue]
Uh, bango-bango.
[Shouting, Cheering]
[French Accent] May I get you
something to drink while you wait?
Yeah. I'd like to unwind.
Could you get me a Chablis?
Blind date, monsieur?
[Snickering]
Yeah.
How'd you know?
When you are French...
you can just tell.
You know, it's getting hard to climb
the corporate ladder being single.
I think that finding the proper wife...
is important to one's professional
image in the business world.
Oui. Oui.
The dating service I'm with
says this girl is one hell of a catch.
Independent, strong,
exciting, well-traveled.
I'm really looking forward
to meeting her.
[Tarzan Yell]
You must be Harvey.
I'm GraceJones.
Hi.
Harvey Bennett.
- Do you think I'm sexy?
- Um...
I said, do you find me sexy?
[Growls]
Yes! Extremely!
I thought so.
May I get you something,
monsieur?
I mean, madame.
I'm in the mood for seafood.
Ah, well, tonight's menu
has sautéed oysters...
deep-fried shrimp...
and the special of the day,
a sheleketepeletois for two...
with a little bit of
le-le-le-le on the side.
I want alligator.
Alligator?
We do not know how
to cook... alligator.
I like it raw!
- Good luck, monsieur.
- [Grace Sighs]
- Uh...
- [Grunts]
Uh, Grace, what do you like
to do with your spare time?
I like to chew glass...
I like to ride sharks...
and I like to bite the heads
off of gummi bears.
Un alligator
pour Mademoiselle Butch!
One minute, Harvey.
Stand back, you weakling!
[Roars]
- [Grace Shouting]
- [Alligator Roaring]
Waiter! Check, please!
Would you like a piece
of my tail, Harvey?
No, thank you, Grace. I've got to be running.
I've got a fax coming into the office.
It's about that time.
It's a real important fax.
The fun is just about to begin.
Wait until you see
my shrunken head collection, Harvey!
Oh, no... Aah!
[Grunts]
♪♪ [Singing]
♪♪ [Hip-hop]
♪♪ [Rapping]
♪♪ [Rapping]
Are you overweight?
Have you tried dozens of
diet and exercise programs...
only to fail miserably?
Then give it up!
It's time you accept yourself
for who you are.
We accept the real you...
at Hefty World
Condominium Estates.
Hefty World accepts you...
because it's a specially designed
condominium community...
just for plump,
or "husky"people.
The second you arrive...
our -hour forklift service
picks you up and whisks you home...
where condominium attendants
roll you up the reinforced ramp...
to your extra-wide entrance way.
Need a shower?
Those helpful Hefty World attendants
are there again to hose you down...
and scrub clean
those hard-to-reach places.
We know that no matter how little
you eat, you'll still gain weight...
so we encourage you.
[Chuckles]
Congratulations, Mr. Stevens.
You just gained
another pounds!
With your high-sugar diet
you'll have less and less energy...
but you'll learn to
depend on us to help you...
- with your unique recreational needs.
- One, two, one, two...
Also, because Mr. Stomach
sometimes feels a little... grumbly...
Hefty World provides these
emergency food stations every feet...
along major streets.
So try out Hefty World.
We know the longer you stay,
the harder it will be for you to leave.
♪ Hefty World ♪
♪ Sets you free ♪♪
♪♪ [Hip-hop]
Yo, yo, yo, whazzup,
all you bad-boy bargain hunters?
It's time for
the Homeboy used car sale.
- I'm Whiz. This is the Iceman.
- Chillin'.
Yo, we got all type of cars
for you to choose from.
We got rows and rows of them!
[P.A. Announcer]
Batting next, Kirk Gibson.!
[Crowd Cheering]
Yo, check out
this lovey-dovey right here.
- Tell 'em what it got.
- Yo, it got everything.
It got mag wheels on it.
It got a Bose system in it.
- It got a C.D. Player in it!
- Yo!
Yo, you could pull
all the honeys in this.
- Wanna keep it?
- Yeah.
I'm sorry, customers,
this was merely a display item.
But don't you fret none 'cause
we got some 'nother stuff over here.
Check out this
lovey-dovey tenderoni.
- Yo, it got a telephone in it.
- Yo, Whiz!
- What?
- I'm goin' crazy.
- Don't do that!
- I'm goin' crazy!
You know what that means...
he's slashin' prices!
In half!
Forty-nine dollars!
Yo, and if you act now...
we gonna throw in this piece of garbage
with the bird doo-doo on it for free.
- Yo, give 'em the number.
- Okay, hold up.
The number is:
- We're willing to work with you.
- That's right.
- No job?
- No problem.
- No credit?
- No problem.
- No money?
- Problem.
We gotta deal on
a strictly cash-type basis.
I know what you're sayin'.
Suppose I got a family.
Check out this beauty down here.
Talk about spacious!
So whether it's a family outing...
or just sneakin' a few friends
across the border...
Yo, this baby seats .
We like to call it
the Partridge Family Special.
And if you hurry now,
we'll even personalize it for you.
- ♪♪ [Organ: "Charge"]
- [Crowd Cheering]
Uh-oh. It's the bottom of the eighth.
We almost outta here.
But don't worry.
If you don't catch us here...
We're gonna have another sale
at the Forum...
during the Luther Vandross concert.
- So this is the Homeboys sayin'...
- [Both] Peace!
♪♪ [Hip-hop]
♪♪ [Rapping]
♪♪ [Rapping]
♪♪ [Rapping]
♪♪ [Rapping]
[Woman]
Crissy.!
- Huh?
- What are you doing?
I'm sitting and waiting
and being quiet.
And now...
it's time for... Black World!
Yea!
And in Black World...
all the black people
have the money...
and... and... and your mother
doesn't have to, um...
stay up in the theater
and clean up late at night...
while you have to sit
and wait and be quiet.
A-And then you're sleepy.
And then, when you go to school,
um, it's no rats in the corner.
And no mice either.
The books are brand-new, and they
have pictures of black people in 'em.
Oh, and all your dolls are black.
And not no black Barbie either...
but a real black doll
with black people hair and a black nose.
And her name is, um...
And her name is LaWanda.
And... And... Oh...
Oh, and when you go to the store...
um, the white people
don't follow you around...
and ask you if you have money, like
they know you don't have any money...
'cause your mother didn't give you
any money 'cause she not have any money.
And then...
'Cause they not there anyway.
'Cause the black people own the stores,
and they are nice to you.
And the white people, th-they...
I don't know where they are.
They... They must be
back in White World.
But, um... Oh! Oh!
A-And in Black World...
the president is...
The Boyz!
Yea! Yeah!
And... No... No... And, um...
And just... No, okay...
SoJesseJackson is the king! Yea!
Oh! Oh! Shh.
And I have a special treat
for you today.
Here we have...
It's... Yes.
It's the queen of Black World.
Yea!
Yes, and I want to say...
I'm happy to be here...
because we are celebrating...
that South Africa is free!
Yea, and 'cause we are
going to release...
all of the political prisoners...
starting with, um,
the great Nelson Mandela.
Yea! Um...
And, um, and... the great...
Oh! Okay.
James Brown! Yea!
Yea! Yea!
- [Woman] Crissy.!
- H-H-Huh?
What are you doing?
Shh!
Nothing.
Well, come on, then.!
Okay.
[Mouths "Bye"]
[Audience Applauding, Cheering]
Thank you.
We hope you had
a good time tonight.
We enjoyed ourselves.
We had a good time.
Fly Girls, tell 'em what to do.
[Fly Girls]
See ya next week!
♪ You can do what you wanna do ♪
♪ In living color♪♪
01x05 - Episode 5
Watch/Buy Amazon
Sketch comedy series strove to produce comedy with a strong emphasis on modern Black subject matter.
Sketch comedy series strove to produce comedy with a strong emphasis on modern Black subject matter.