02x06 - A Tight Squeeze

[bunniefuu]

♪♪

He's had it

Dead as the pharaohs.

[ Gasps] m*rder?

Snuffed it.

Ha ha ha!

♪♪

[ Crash!]

[ Whistle! Thud!]

- Oh, blimey.

- Cut!

♪♪

♪♪

Hmm.

- Mint Imperials from Felix.

- Oh! Much appreciated.

Oh, and the flowers

are from production.

Hmm.

[ Clears throat]

"Hope it's not too stiff.

Love the "Oh, Do Behave" g*ng."

- Oh, well, that's nice.

- Hmm.

Yes, I hope I didn't mess

things up too much.

It was very convincing.

Well, that'll be

Felix's doing, I'd imagine.

- Oh, yes?

- He's on set right now

as their police advisor.

This one is,

"Oh, Do Behave, Constable."

So he's there helping out,

making sure that the law

is represented correctly

at all times.

Mm.

Then the officers would seek

to notify the next of kin

before canvassing for witnesses

and taking statements.

Right.

We're not doing any of that.

Get that back to wardrobe.

Tell them shorter, lower.

Tell them hurry up.

Well, these are all

essential components

- of a m*rder investigation.

- I want to entertain people,

thrill them.

Audiences don't want procedure,

Constable Livingston.

- They want titillation.

- It is Sergeant Livingston.

And respectfully, I disagree.

Er, Sexton?

Erm, sorry.

I got the amend for today,

and just wondering

Do you think my character would

fall on to Bonnie Pluck Rose

- like that?

- Let me stop you there, Roy.

First of all,

it's not your character.

They're all mine.

Sexton St. Juste productions,

remember?

Not Roy Perk.

Secondly, you see here

on the page?

What does it say?

Does it say he falls

onto Bonnie Pluck Rose.

- Yes, but

- There you go.

Heavens.

I don't know what's worse.

This one telling me

how to do my job or you.

What you want, darling?

A tip.

Never work with children

or animals.

Speaking of which,

where is Sally?

Where is Eric? Am I the only one

actually working today?

Sir?

Sir, if we could

if we could finish the convers

I bet you get to go

to all the fab parties, eh?

Los Angeles, "Cans."

Cannes, Peggy.

Cannes.

But it's not all that exciting.

I get bored with the parties,

to be honest.

I wish showbiz had nothing

to do with acting.

- Oh.

- Oh, I like the craft,

becoming someone.

Take my character.

She's just seen

her first dead body, right?

Her first m*rder victim.

What does that feel like?

The first one.

Er

Fine!

That interfering, old dandy!

Now, now, Eric, come on.

Calm down now.

- Here.

- I'm not doing another one

of these poxy films ever again,

I promise you.

Let's just get through it

in one piece.

I'm a consummate professional.

I'm not in there.

I'm here.

Not like that, darling.

Get over to wardrobe.

Chop, chop.

Airing my dirty laundry

to the washer.

- Eric

- The old piece of work, Sexton.

I've got a good mind

to knock your block off.

Problem, darling?

Anything the police

can help with?

Marvellous.

Everybody over to the set.

Places, please.

♪♪

Now look here.

Robust Aubergine

was a guest of our parish,

a VIP of international renown.

It falls to the police

of Bishop's Rise

to solve his m*rder.

He cracked it on our turf,

and you know it.

I've got Baggy Bottom's finest

working on it right now.

- How many officers?

- Plenty.

Well, can't you give me

a rough figure?

You've got one of those

already. Ha ha ha!

And cut.

Here, can we go

on that one again?

I think I could lend that "rough

figure" gag a little bit better.

Doubt it. Besides, no one's

watching it for your bon mot.

They'd rather look at hers.

Oh, for heaven's sake.

Really?

Well, they need something nice

to gawk at, don't you think?

If it's just you on the screen,

people are likely

to burn it down.

- Why am I dressed like this?

- You've gone undercover.

She's not under much cover

from where I'm standing.

Does this mean I'm

I'm not doing the fall?

Of course

you're still doing the fall.

That's all you're good for.

But if she's dressed like that,

then

- She'll end up undressed, yes?

- Beg your pardon.

- Oh, Sexton, don't be vulgar.

- Yeah. Come on, mate.

I like an eyeful

as much as the next bloke,

but this is a no.

Can't we at least

talk about this

without the audience?

Oh, so you're all revolting.

You in both senses of the word.

Fine.

Everybody break for lunch.

Cast can stay and talk.

Rest of you, shoo.

♪♪

I was just coming to find you.

Fancy a spot of lunch?

I already ate,

and I'm about to head back.

- How is Sister Boniface?

- Resting up.

She was very excited

about your work here, though.

- Really?

- Oh, yes.

Looking forward to your

influence on the finished film.

Boys in blue at their best.

What's wrong?

I think I should have

another word with the director.

- Okay.

- I'll see you later, yeah?

[ Engine turns over]

♪♪

Mr. St. Juste?

Look, I think we should have

a proper talk

as to my responsibilities here

and just how you plan

to depict the police.

Sir, we are not fools.

We are officers

of keen intelligence,

diligent and smart

and observant.

[ Camera whirring]

♪♪

- m*rder?!

- It looks that way.

Well, then there's no time

to waste.

[ Door creaks open]

No, no, no, no.

You stay where you are.

You are interfering

with the recovery process.

Strictly no visitors.

But

But it's police business.

Oh, well, then perhaps

the police would like

to handle it themselves

for a change.

But we

She

Of course, Reverend Mother.

Apologies.

Er, wishing you

a speedy recovery, Sister.

It's nettle soup.

Lukewarm nettle soup.

Sorry. The walk from the kitchen

took longer than expected.

Oh! Oh! Ooh!

Oh, my goodness.

Oh, dear.

Oh, no, no, no!

No, no, no, no!

Please! Please!

Sister, stop touching it.

Oh! Erm erm, maybe, erm

Maybe you could do me

a small favour instead.

♪♪

No luck with Sister Boniface.

She's under lock and key,

more or less.

Here.

Strangulation, I would say.

But there's no sign of a w*apon.

This was still running

when I found him.

Okay, well,

let's get that developed

as quickly as possible.

Knock, knock.

[ Chuckles]

Ah!

Sister Boniface's idea,

I take it.

She's briefed us, told us

everything we need to know.

It'll be as though

she was here herself.

That the victim?

I can see we're in safe hands.

Alright, better make a start

on our crime scene.

Actually, there are

two crime scenes.

Two?

Yeah, there's been

a development.

[ Film winds,

camera shutter clicks]

I can tell you something.

No professional burglar

did this.

You always start

bottom drawer up. Saves time.

- So I've heard.

- Right.

Reg, we need fingerprints,

fibres, forensics.

Divorce papers.

He had a wife?

But he was so obviously

entitled to respect and dignity.

Hmm.

Look at who he's married to.

Interesting.

♪♪

Dead?

Are you quite sure?

Yes.

And we suspect foul play.

Well, that would explain it.

We found a divorce petition

in his dressing room.

Forgive me for saying,

but you didn't seem

like a married couple.

It was a marriage

of convenience.

Well, for him, at least.

He was keeping up appearances.

And what changed?

My appearances.

With the divorce not settled,

you'd enjoy a payout

in the event of his death.

Oh! A benefit to our marriage.

Finally.

- You don't seem very upset.

- [ Scoffs]

You saw what he was like,

didn't you?

He could be a little bit

abrasive at times.

Let's not mince words, Sergeant.

The man was a monster.

Heavens. Only this afternoon,

he had poor Sally in tears.

Miss Chagford?

He took her aside

for a quiet word,

and given how unabashed he was

at insulting us all publicly,

one can only imagine the things

he would say in private.

And he was the same with you?

He was the same with all of us.

I'm sorry, gentlemen.

You have my sympathies.

Well, good luck

with finding someone

who didn't want him dead.

Miss Loveday tells us you had

an emotional discussion

with Mr. St. Juste earlier.

Would you mind telling us

what he said?

He rewrote the scene

so when Roy fell on me,

me dress was supposed

to fall off.

And when I said

I didn't want to do it,

and insulted my acting ability,

told me there's only two reasons

people cast me in anything.

And what are they?

Told him I'm an actor,

not a doll.

I've had people take

a serious interest in my work.

You don't honestly think

these playwrights

and theatrical agents

are meeting you

for any other reason?

Oh, darling.

Oh, bless.

Look, it's obvious

where your talents lie.

Be a good sport and do this,

and I won't have to cast around

for another pretty pair.

You are such a pig!

So as far as Sexton

is concerned,

it's strip off or be replaced.

I'd already run off

before he could get that far,

but probably.

Who was left at rehearsal

after you'd gone?

Genevieve, Eric, and Roy.

We were the only ones

in the scene,

but what any of them did

after I'd gone,

I have no idea.

Well, thank you.

♪♪

Right.

Reverend Mother has gone

for her pre-supper ablutions.

- We've got 30 minutes, tops.

- All right.

[ Clears throat]

- Little early, Sister.

- It ain't for me.

It got delivered

to the dead bloke's trailer.

- Thought it might be a clue.

- Huh.

Sure.

"Thanks for the tip,

William Asher."

Crime scene photos.

- Fresh from the darkroom.

- Yes, marvellous.

Leave them down here, please.

[ Clears throat]

I left the lens cap on

for the first few.

Sorry.

Still learning.

No, but, erm, look the,

erm the contrast

on this one of the neck

Very good.

Excellent composition,

Sister Peter.

I only mean that the detail

might help give a better idea

of the m*rder w*apon.

See, erm, the indentation

of a floral design there

in the centre?

A necklace?

Well, at first glance, I'd say

the ligatures are too wide,

but

They look like straps,

but they curl up like so,

and it's the same on both sides.

Oh, dear.

Oh, I say.

Steady on.

[ Laughs]

[ Clears throat] Felix.

Oh, no, I-I-I wasn't

I didn't mean to oh.

Don't get your knickers

in a twist.

We've all seen them before.

No, no, no, no! Sister!

♪♪

[ Grunts]

Well done, Sister.

Thank goodness

the Reverend Mother

didn't catch us.

Right.

But it's safe to say

we know what our missing

m*rder w*apon was

Death by brassiere.

I always said those things

were m*rder.

Are we still doing this?

Well, in a manner of speaking.

I've got Eric's joke.

Well, it's your joke now.

It'll be funnier

coming from you.

And you think having a nicer

person behind the camera

- is enough to save the show?

- Well, it's worth a sh*t.

I mean, what's the worst

that could happen?

Another one of us ends up dead?

Just do as he asks,

and we're all out of contract.

None of us has to do another

one of these ever again.

Right, well, let's get on

with it, shall we?

Er, places, please.

[ Camera whirring]

[ Sneezes]

Ugh! Oh! Ah!

Ugh! Ugh!

Ah! Ugh!

I have told you before about

teasing my Pterois radiata!

- Oh!

- Special Constable Feely!

- [ Groans]

- Hello, hello, hello.

- What's all this?

- Another bust

for the Bishop's Rise Police?

[ Laughs]

Inspector Jugs!

Er, not yet, I haven't.

Ha ha ha ha!

And cut there!

That was great!

Sally, perfect.

Eric, you were gold.

Really? You think?

Alright, let's take

a tight half an hour,

and then I want that same energy

when we come back.

[ Laughter]

[ Sighs]

I've looked all over for you.

Well, that was foolish.

I haven't been all over. I've

been here, waiting for me lunch.

Lunch?

We've barely started.

We've done our bit

Collected evidence,

worked out what the w*apon was.

- They'll do the rest.

- We've still got to find the

Two big baps.

- I asked for a sausage roll.

- Oh, are you sure?

Sorry.

Look here

finding the m*rder w*apon

is legwork for the coppers.

Finding the m*rder w*apon

is a moral obligation,

and it might be fun.

Hard work, more like.

I don't know how she does it,

rummaging around in drawers

and dustbins and all that

snooping and science.

I get tired

just thinking about it.

If you ask me,

Sister Boniface is doing

what any good sister

would do with her talents

Helping people.

Good sister?

What am I then?

Flaky tart?

- I beg your pardon?

- Your flaky tart.

I said sausage roll.

What did you even write down?

I wrote down "nun."

Why didn't you write down

my order?

Because then I wouldn't know

who to give it to.

Give me strength.

Right. Let's go and look

for these bras then

before I lose my marbles.

Come on.

Sausage roll!

Oh, sorry.

She's gone.

She's gone? I thought

she said "sausage roll."

[ Sighs]

Peggy's gone to wardrobe.

She'll take what

she finds to the lab.

You and I should probably deal

with the suspects in person.

Wait.

To ask them for their

It's police work, Felix.

Evidence.

Have they started filming again?

Okay, I'm gonna go

and find out what's happening.

You start with, erm,

Sally's bra.

[ Indistinct conversations]

- Have you resumed filming?

- [ Clears throat]

No flies on you, chap.

But your director is dead.

Roy's taken over.

Didn't waste any time

getting it back, did he?

- Getting it back?

- Yeah.

It was him that wrote

the first one the play.

Whole idea was his basically.

♪♪

[ Knocking on door]

Ah, oh, well, it's, erm, not a

great time for this, Inspector.

I've I've got a lot

of work on.

Yeah. I was surprised to

see production back so quickly.

Well, we're

We're under contract,

and we've only got the location

for so long.

You know, there's a lot

of time-sensitive pressures,

- financial obligations.

- It is a crime scene.

Yes, and we're working

around it.

Believe me. Erm, is that all

you wanted to ask me?

We've been, er, on the lookout

for an item of clothing

that may be connected

to the death of Mr. St. Juste.

An undergarment, to be precise.

Oh.

That. Ah.

Er, well, yes.

Well, funny thing is,

erm, groupies.

Er, tenacious, they are.

It's mine, Inspector.

Miss Loveday.

Groupies, darling?

Really?

Well, I tried my best.

Did Sexton know about this?

Nobody does.

We were hoping

to keep it that way.

But with your husband

out of the way,

that's a lot less

to worry about.

♪♪

That's the last of them.

There's dozens with that rose

design on the front.

Nothing.

I'm not sure any of this

is working.

What's supposed to happen?

The evidence sits under a sheet

of blotting paper,

which has been sprayed with

starch attached to a blue dye.

It will then react

with any amylase on the fabric.

We put the glass plate on top.

Press it down with our rear.

Oh!

Oh, it's changing colour.

Is it?

It must be covered in it,

Covered in what?

Saliva.

Eric Cockburn?

How does a bloke's bra

get covered in spit?

Ooh.

My underwear?

- Yes, please.

- Right, of course.

Cos that's what

I'm here for, isn't it?

- Sally Strip-off.

- No, no, this

This is important police work.

An abuse of power.

That's what it is.

You know, I thought you were

one of the nice ones.

[ Sighs]

C erm, erm, er

Can I j Can I just have

the t the top part, please?

The The brassiere?

Not the

Not Not the bottom part.

Everything all right?

Fine, yeah.

Pig!

Perhaps you could just

gather them all together

and bring them out

when you're decent.

I'm not sure you need

to do that now.

Hello.

We think we found it.

Do we know who it belongs to?

Yeah, it's

♪♪

Here.

Round the back.

♪♪

Hey!

Get out of here.

[ Engine turns over]

♪♪

Stop that van!

♪♪

Oh, blimey.

What's going on?

I was only trying

to get to the pub,

and these two penguins

come out of nowhere.

See you got your hands

full again, Sergeant.

[ Both laugh]

♪♪

I ain't done nothing wrong.

- You tried to escape.

- Yeah.

You knew we were

looking for brassieres

because you'd overheard me

say as much.

But you knew why

we were looking for them.

I didn't k*ll nobody.

I leave that stuff

lying about anywhere.

The crew pick it up.

Anyone could have borrowed it.

You auditioned

for the Maigret film.

Am I right?

My colleague overheard you

complaining

about Sexton spilling your

dirty laundry to the washer.

Now, my guess is that the washer

is a nickname for William Asher,

the Maigret film producer.

What did he tip him off to?

Hmm?

I noticed

your hip flask earlier.

I drink, yes.

But I don't flub my lines,

I don't miss my marks,

and I don't cock up.

But Sexton

He spreads it about

that I'm hard to work with.

He tells the Maigret lot

that I'm a liability.

So they withdrew their offer.

That's made you angry.

Bloody furious!

A forensics examination

of this bra

showed it was covered in saliva.

Must have taken

a fair bit of anger

to shove that whole thing

in his mouth.

Not when your mouth's

as big as his.

[ Camera whirring]

You're a heel.

You know that?

A big bucket of manure.

Oh, darling, I've spared you

the embarrassment.

It was a favour.

Anything to keep me here,

your pet buffoon.

It is the part

you were born to play.

♪♪

[ Gagging]

[ Coughing]

He weren't dead when I left him.

If he suffocated, I'd

[ Chuckles]

it was an accident.

I weren't trying

to do him no harm.

You believe me, don't you?

♪♪

- You let him go?

- I didn't charge him.

There's a difference.

We know that our victim

was strangled.

This whole suffocating

with a bra

and leaving it behind

It doesn't add up.

That's if he's

telling the truth.

- He's an actor, after all.

- Look, I want to see

what's on this film before

we go barking up the wrong tree.

Can we stop gabbing

and get on with it?

The Rev's with the plumber,

but there's only so many rocks

I can stuff down the sink.

That was you?

- We need her distracted.

- Well, the next time

you distract her,

try to do it on the other side

of the building

from the infirmary.

No gratitude.

[ Projector whirring]

S-S-Sister?

Okay. Here we go.

♪♪

What's happened there?

Ah!

You have to be joking.

We have a camera running

at a m*rder scene,

and it has captured

absolutely nothing.

It might still be worth

letting Sister Boniface

have a butcher's.

Perhaps we've missed something.

It's a wall.

Fine.

It can't hurt.

Sister

why are these reels so large?

It's the format.

35 mil.

And are there smaller formats

in film?

There's 16 millimetre,

8 millimetre.

That's more for cameras

people have at home, though.

He was asking me.

And one of those films

How big would a canister be?

Say about this size?

Yes, almost exactly.

Felix?

Before he went

into Genevieve's trailer,

Sexton took a delivery

of a small canister.

I thought it was part

of the film production.

But it could be personal.

The sort of thing you might

search his trailer for.

[ Chuckles]

It's mainly just the wall.

There's a shadow at the start,

but it's not much to go on.

Hmm. Well, I'm sure

fresh eyes can't hurt.

And it makes a change

from nettle soup.

As long as you don't find out

that I made a mistake

letting Eric Cockburn go.

I trust your instincts

on that one, Sam.

If he really thought he k*lled

Mr. St. Juste by suffocating him,

- then he's not our strangler.

- Hmm.

Well, hopefully, Felix's hunch

on the home video pays off.

We need something to go on,

so

[ Indistinct conversation]

♪♪

I thought I heard voices.

Hmm?

Oh, erm

Well, that must have been

a-a workman.

Been a few about, so

- Roofers, yes.

- Hmm.

I'll be overseeing

their work on the East Wing.

It would seem that

some of the tiles

have magically gone missing.

Oh, how peculiar.

Yes, very.

Oh. Erm

I'm sorry, er

[ Exhales deeply]

- Yes. Thank you.

- Thank you.

♪♪

Perhaps if you told me what you

were looking for, I could help.

Perhaps if you waited outside,

I could work a little faster.

♪♪

"Wedding?"

Well, he was never

that sentimental.

Said my dress looked like

a tart's handkerchief.

Well, you can't need it, surely.

I'm afraid

that this is evidence,

so, yes, I will have to take it.

[ Snoring]

Mm, you're looking

none too healthy.

This one's awake,

Dr. Thrustgood.

Thank you, Nurse Blush.

Dr. Wedbetter, with me!

[ Clears throat]

- Excuse me, doctors.

- Ooh! Ooh!

Found a cure yet?

Sorry, I'm a little

out of habit.

So is she.

But just her leg.

[ Laughter]

Excuse me, but what does that

thing on your head actually do?

This?

[ Sighs]

This lets me know where I am.

Where's that been?

In the spotlight.

[ Chuckles]

Mm!

Of course!

♪♪

Bingo!

♪♪

Just hope this one's a bit

more revealing than the last.

[ Projector whirring]

♪♪

No turning back.

Move it.

Sister Reginald!

[ Bells tolling]

You'll put your back out

stacking them that high.

Ah, I could do twice this

at Billingsgate.

And how many years ago was that?

Still in my prime.

Never you worry.

Who needs all that wine anyways?

- The film people.

- Yeah.

You know what

they showbiz types are like.

[ Birds chirping]

♪♪

Not to be a nuisance,

but you're hurting my bad leg.

Oh! Ah!

Ooh.

[ Projector whirring]

- [ Exhales sharply]

- Well

you did say

you wanted revealing.

Hmm.

I think you'll need to explain

this one to, er

Sister Boniface.

- Yes.

- Yeah.

Mm. Hmm.

Yes.

Yes, I think that light

was a bit more to the left.

- Maybe two-thirds of an inch.

- Mm-hmm.

And, erm

yes, the director's chair

needs tilting

about seven degrees

south-southwest.

How about I just turn it

and you say when?

When, when, when.

Ah, back on your feet.

More or less, yes.

I've had a flash of inspiration.

Right.

Well, erm, speaking of flashes,

Felix found

the missing home movie.

Oh, good. Yes.

Does it show us much?

Erm

[ Clears throat]

You could say that.

When I say "home movie,"

I mean more bedroom movie.

Oh.

- Oh.

- Hmm.

[ Indistinct conversations]

Apologies, but we would

like you all to join us on set.

Well, whatever for?

We were about to rehearse.

I imagine some of you would

like to be cleared of m*rder.

♪♪

Thanks to the camera

that was left running

and witness testimonies,

we're able

to reenact the last moments

of Sexton St. Juste,

which we'll perform for you now.

[ Clears throat]

Er, lights, camera, action.

Erm, anyway, erm,

as per the footage,

a figure comes

from behind the camera

and casts a shadow over Sexton,

here, played

by Sergeant Livingston.

Is this entirely necessary?

Well, a k*ller could just

step forward

and admit what they've done.

You don't honestly think

it was one of us?

Keep watching.

You'll find out.

Erm, this person then takes

their bra off like so

and accidentally

knocks the camera.

Obviously,

Sally and Genevieve here

couldn't pull off

a brassiere like that

without [clears throa]

exposing themselves.

Now, hold on.

I already explained what

happened here to the copper.

- It was an accident.

- No, it was m*rder.

Sexton was strangled,

and there's no mistaking that.

Hang about. Strangled?

But I stuffed it in his gob.

Sally, you may go.

- [ Sighs]

- Now, hold your horses.

I did not do no strangling

of no one.

You're right.

You didn't.

- Sally did.

- What?

I had to put you in front

of the spotlight to be sure.

Your dress gave it away.

You weren't caught on camera,

but the reflections were.

Moments after Eric left

the still-breathing Sexton,

you came in and k*lled him.

- What?

- That's a stretch.

Why would I?

What for?

For this.

You haven't watched it,

have you?

♪♪

He told me

he'd show it to the papers.

I was going to the West End

after this

to do some proper acting.

I'd be a joke,

a tart the rest of my life

if that came out.

You are such a pig!

Listen, love,

if you won't do this,

I'll have to drum up publicity

some other way.

Perhaps the press might like to

see one of your earlier films.

It's a bit blue, mind you,

and shows a lot more

than I'm asking for.

Took some work tracking it down.

Not my cup of tea, of course,

but I'm still very glad

to have it.

I hate you!

♪♪

I thought if I got

the film, I'd be okay.

Turned his trailer over,

but it weren't there.

[ Breathing heavily]

I was in a panic

when I couldn't find it.

I have to make him tell me.

[ Gagging]

[ Coughing]

Where is it?!

The swine wouldn't say,

just kept grinning.

He was enjoying how upset I was.

♪♪

It was a stupid blue film I made

years ago when I was a dancer.

I didn't want people thinking

I was a tart

and not a serious actress.

He was gonna ruin my chances.

But I've done that myself,

haven't I?

Sally Chagford

I'm arresting you for the m*rder

of Sexton St. Juste.

- [ Sobbing]

- You are not obliged

to say anything

unless you wish to do so,

but anything you do say

may be put into writing

and given in evidence.

I am sorry.

[ Sighs]

♪♪

Their first tip-off

was the snuff box.

Why would celebrated

anthrophile Robust Aubergine

reach for his tobacco

when admiring [sniff]

the fragrance of pink bloomers?

Perhaps it was the stench

of your pathetic village.

Later, when I examined

the fingerprint powder,

I discovered that it was laced

with fine black pepper,

which triggered a sneezing fit.

Yeah, that's had me sneezing

and all.

Oh, you buffoon.

Aubergine reaches

for his medicinal snuff,

only to inhale a fatal dose

of lionfish venom

Venom from someone's

pet Pterois radiata.

- You've got one of those, too.

- Oh, shut up!

Robust Aubergine was not

in Bishop's Rise

for the fattest plums

competition.

He was on the trail

of Fanny DuBonc,

the poisoner of Provence.

That looks just like you, ma'am.

[French accen] Oh, mon dieu!

I should have k*lled you, too,

you

Whoa!

And cut!

That's a wrap.

- [ Laughter]

- I have to say,

despite everything,

that was the best one yet.

"Yet"?

I thought you weren't doing

another one of these poxy films

ever again.

Well, with him,

they're not poxy.

They're fun. All of the sauce

and none of the sleaze.

Well, it won't be the same

without Sally.

Well, if we make any money

on the next one,

we could all chip in

You know,

for legal expenses and things.

Well, I'm game if you are.

Well, I did have an idea

for one set in a convent.

I've always wanted

to wear a wimple.

Well [clears throa]

you do have some bad habits.

Oh, do behave.

[ Laughter]

[ Applause]

♪♪

[ Grunts]

It's like you were never gone.

Thank you.

Now, you must hurry along

or you'll miss your wrap party.

And the extra

he's been talking to.

She prefers the term

"background artiste."

- Yeah.

- [ Chuckles]

- Oh!

- Ooh!

No!

Ah! You're awake.

Perfect. Hmm.

You know, I thought

I was going to have to spend

another afternoon overseeing

repairs on the outer wall.

But then I happened to come

across a huge pile of masonry

just outside

Sister Reginald's cell.

- How strange.

- Strange, yes,

I thought so myself.

And she kindly volunteered

to do the work herself,

which left me free

to plan my evening properly.

[ Chuckles]

You know, the funny thing is

[chucklin]

the funny I half expected you

to do something childish,

like stuff your bed with pillows

and and

And climb out the window.

Oh! Well, that would have

been mischievous.

Yes, it would,

especially for the policemen.

Because if I thought

that they were

sneaking into private quarters

again,

I would have to report

their perversions

to the chief constable.

Anyways, what with your leg

preventing you

from attending vespers,

I thought we should do something

to accommodate you

and bring it here

to you instead.

Oh, no! You don't have

to do that on my account.

♪♪

Ah!

Oh, God ♪

Come to our aid ♪

- Oh, Lord ♪

- Right then.

Make haste ♪

[ Both arguing indistinctly]

To help us ♪

Oh, God ♪

Come to our aid ♪

Glory be to the Father

and the Son,

and the Holy Spirit.

Amen.

Amen.

♪♪