06x13 - The Kids Are Alright

[bunniefuu]

[instrumental music playing]
Yellow wire goes to…
Honey, what are you doing?
Being a man, Cheyenne.

The heater's broken and I'm fixing it.

That's what men do.

We fix things.
Is this a butter Kn*fe?
Well, I broke the screwdriver

trying to get the pliers

out of the garbage disposal.


Are you sure

you should be messing with that?


I mean, it's electricity.

Isn't it all sparkly?

I have a book.

"The Do It Yourself Guide to Home Repair."


That book will teach you

how to fix or build anything.


And after I'm done fixing the heater,

I'm building us a koi pond.

[knocking at door]
You know what, I bet that's Mom.

-You better get your apology ready.

-I don't know why we have to apologize.

Because you called her Barbra Jean.
I'm baffled. I called her Barbra Jean

because she was coming over too much,

like Barbra Jean.


And now, if I apologize,

she's gonna come over again, too much.

It's madness.
Van, your little joke hurt her feelings.
It's comedy, Cheyenne, people get hurt
Hey, Mom. Come on in.

-Come on in?

-[Cheyenne] Mmm-hmm.


Isn't that the kind of thing

that Barbra Jean would do?


No, Barbra Jean would stand

at the door pouting

and being all sarcastic. [chuckles]
I can't turn it off.

Mom, we are really sorry

that we hurt your feelings.

We feel terrible.

Because you realize it's completely crazy

to compare me to Barbra Jean, right?

Yes. Absolutely.
Van?
Yes.

All's forgiven.

Oh, honey, I missed you so much.


Yeah. So where's Elizabeth?

I wanted to say hi to her.


She's spending the night

over at Claire's house


so Cheyenne and I can do some work

on the house.


Maybe I'll just pop over there

to say hi to her.


Yeah, 'cause that's what

Barbra Jean would do. [laughing]

Come on, people, that's funny.
[electricity buzzes]
See how God works.
I think I blew out a filling.

-Oh, no, just a piece of chicken.

-Oh.

Okay, well, I am all done here.

-Let's fire this puppy up.

-All right.

[sighs]
Huh!
Do I know my hot air or what?
Yeah, honey, you are good.
You should fix the toilet next.

No, I can't.

The wrench is on the roof of the garage.

Well, a rat took my chips…
You take care of home repair then.
I'm really glad we apologized to mom.

The only reason

she comes over here all the time

is because she misses us.
She doesn't miss us.

-She doesn't trust us.

-What are you talking about?


She still thinks of us

as those irresponsible -year-old kids


that she has to keep an eye on,

or we'll have a baby.

We are having a baby.
Yeah, that's another thing we men do.

-Oh, gosh.

-[chuckles]


Your mom just doesn't see us

as the adults we've become.

We're grown up.
We're homeowners.
I think we can take care of ourselves.
Yeah. Yeah. She's a little overprotective.

-I mean, we know what we're doing.

-Yeah.

Man…

That heater you got

is really kicking out some heat.

Yeah, well, I turned it on high to get…
[screaming]
[blowing]
[theme song playing]

[Reba]
Ha, hey!


♪ My roots are planted in the past ♪


♪ Though my life is changing fast ♪


♪ Who I am is who I wanna be ♪


♪ A single mom who works too hard ♪


♪ Who loves her kids and never stops ♪


♪ With gentle hands ♪


♪ And the heart of a fighter ♪


♪ I'm a survivor ♪


-Hey, Reba.

-Hey.


What is the one thing

that Barbra Jean wants


more than anything else

in the whole wide world?

A panda bear that rides a bicycle.
Okay, yeah. But she also wants

to go to the hot air balloon festival

in New Mexico,


and I made reservations

for us to go this spring.

Really? Well, let me ask you a question.

-Won't you all be divorced by then?

-Not if I can help it.


That's why I'm trying

to find things that make her happy.


-That's why I booked this trip.

-Okay, question number two.


Weren't you the one that always wanted

to go on the hot air balloons?


And didn't Barbra Jean always call them

the hot air puke baskets?

I just don't know what else to do.
Oh, I know.

And I'm just saying this

to try to protect you.


You may have to face reality.

It may be over.

You know, spending so much time alone

has made me realize

how much she's a part of me.


How dull and empty

the world is without her.


Right now, there's a hole

where my heart should be.

Oh, gag.
What? I thought that was very moving.
Yeah, moving my lunch up.

Brock, marriage is not

a poorly written greeting card.

Everybody knows you two love each other.

That's not the reason

why you're not together.


I know it takes more than love

to make a marriage work.


But I'm not the one who went out

and got a new career and a new life.


Oh, so you want her to go back

being just "your wife"?

[exclaims]

I've been just your wife

and it ain't that great.

Forget about it.
Okay, I'm sorry.

But you come in here telling me

this cornball speech,

and you expect me to take it seriously.
Okay, maybe it was dumb.
And maybe it didn't sound real.

But I feel…

Look, I'm just trying to figure out how…

I miss my wife.
Mom, Dad, check it out.

Buddy, could you give us

a minute right now?


We're trying to have

an adult conversation.


Fine. Miss the fire

at Van and Cheyenne's house.

The… What?
Cheyenne, Van, let me in. It's me.
And me. It's us.
Hey you guys, how's everything?

-Was there a fire?

-A what?


Oh! A fire.

You know what, there was a fire.


A little tiny, teeny fire,

it was practically a spark.


-Thanks for stopping by. Bye.

-Van, wait.


-Oh my God, look at that.

-[gasps]

God, it stinks in here.

I kind of like it.

It reminds me of my grandpa.

He's a pyromaniac.
Where's Cheyenne and Elizabeth?

Elizabeth's over at Claire's,

and Cheyenne's upstairs.

Guys calm down. Everything's fine.
Buddy, what the heck happened?

What's with all these questions?

What am I, on trial?


Wait a minute, weren't you

working on something over here earlier?


-Working on something? [scoffing]

-Yeah.

I don't know.
Oh! No, Van.

-You caused the fire?

-Oh! Yeah.

Blame it on me. I caused the fire.
[crying] Yes.
I caused the fire. We're responsible.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
Not we, you, you were responsible.

He tried to fix the heater

with the butter Kn*fe and a book.

Well, it's your fault, too!
"Oh, I'm cold, I'm cold." Put on a jacket!
Oh, yeah, yeah, Van.

I said, "Oh, yeah, I'm chilly,

why don't you ignite the house!"


All right. Calm down.

It's not that big of a deal.


-See, your mom agrees with me.

-Oh, zip it, Sparky.


All right, everybody,

everybody just take it easy.


Now, look,

this is a very stressful situation.


You don't want to say something now

that you might regret later.


I should have never married you

or bought a house with you!

Like that.

Mom, I think

we're gonna need to stay at your house

for a couple of days, is that okay?

-Sure. That's okay.

-I hope you got fire insurance.

I'm gonna go grab a few things.
Well, make sure to grab my lighter.

-[laughs sarcastically]

-[Van] Hey…

I'm just trying to…

I'm just trying to make a little joke,

'cause it's just this…

I've been breathing smoke all day.
I'm not… [laughs maniacally]
I'm very emotional.
What happened? Where's the fire?

They put the fire out.

Everything's okay and everybody's safe.


-Don't worry.

-Oh, gosh. Thank goodness.


-Oh, my Lord.

-Psst!

[mouthing] Talk to her.

[clears throat] Uh, Barbra Jean,

there's something I'd like to say to you.


Yeah, there's something

I wanna say to you, too.

Well, both of you.
I got a new job offer today.

-What?

-I'm moving to Arkansas.


You're actually considering

moving to Arkansas?

For a little while.

And then the next goal

is a major market city.

And ultimately, how do the words,

"The CBS evening news

with Stormy Clearweather," sound?

Like the end of CBS.

You know what, I should start practicing

interviewing distraught victims.

I'm gonna go find Van.
You okay over there?
Oh, yeah, yeah, I'm fine.

It's really good for her, huh?

Things are really falling her way.


You don't have to pretend

you're happy for her.


Oh, I'm not pretending.

You know what, you were right before.


I always thought that the same things

made us happy,


but this really makes her happy,

so I want it for her.

Well then, go tell her that.

Tell her that you've changed.

You've got to fight for her.

No, I'm not gonna do that.
I think I've done enough damage already.

I want Barbra Jean to be happy,

even if it means that I won't be.

Now if you'll excuse me, Reba,

this smoke is really starting

to bother my eyes.


[B.J.] Because the people

want to know, Van, that's why.

[scoffs]

I can't get an interview,

and he acts like the victim.


I think we need to talk

about this Little Rock thing.

Oh, I know. Isn't it exciting?

To be honest with you,

I think it's a little selfish.

Selfish? Unbelievable.

For the first time,

I start thinking about myself


and what would make me happy,

and suddenly I'm selfish.

[scoffs]

I believe

that's the definition of selfish.


Well fine.

Then you know what, I'm selfish.


Barbra Jean, isn't that the very thing

that used to bug you so much about Brock?


But I think he's changed.

He really wants to make this work.

Reba, Brock has not changed.

He just wants the past,

where everything revolves around him.


-And you want the future?

-Yes.


-Where everything revolves around you?

-Yes.


Don't you see what's happening here?

You're becoming Brock.

Brock's becoming me. And I'm becoming you!

You know what,

I really appreciate you trying to help,

but this isn't your problem.

I believe that every marriage

that can be saved, should be saved.


Mine couldn't,

but yours still has a chance.

You know what, I got to go.
If I'm gonna go to Little Rock,
I got to tell the station here

so they can find somebody else

to do the weather.

I'm becoming Barbra Jean?
Why couldn't I just be Dolly Parton?

Hey, Mrs. H, thanks again

for letting us stay here.

Man, I got to do some laundry.
My shirt still smells like smoke.

The washer's broken.

Do you have your magic butter Kn*fe?

[laughing sarcastically]

Once again,

you've won an argument with your wit.

[laughing sarcastically]
[imitating laugh]

-I'm not laughing at you.

-Oh!


-Did you ask her?

-No, I didn't. You ask her.


-Ask me what?

-You know, no biggie.


We just need to stay here

for the rest of our lives.

What?

-Yep, we can't make it on our own.

-Nope.


I have failed

in providing a safe shelter for my family.


-I am a moron and a jerk. I am a merk.

-Mmm-hmm.


Guys, these things happen.

It was an accident.


Mom, we've lived in our new house

for three days.

And we've already set it on fire.

-So what do you say, Mrs. H?

-No.


-What?

-N-O.

What does that even mean?

It means that you can only stay here

until your house is fixed.

[scoffing]
I don't understand why I can't stay.

I mean, I've lived here my whole life,

and of a sudden I'm person non-grateful?

Listen to me, you kids messed up,
and you're gonna mess up again.

But the most important thing

is how you respond to your mistakes.

And you did great.

You got the fire out

and everybody was safe.


I guess Van did jump into action

after he stopped screaming.


Well, I stopped screaming

'cause you slapped me.

See, the two of you can get through

whatever mess you guys

get yourselves into,

as long as you stick together.
[chuckles]

-You're a loving couple.

-Yeah.

You're a louple.

All right, Mrs. H, we're all packed

and ready to go to the house.


You're going back?

I thought you said it was too smoky?


Yeah, well,

the fire damage wasn't that bad.


I think we were just

freaking out about being on our own.

But you fixed that. You fix everything.
You and your tough love.

-Well, this is it.

-Yeah.

So soon.

I know you guys were gonna move back,

but I'm still really not ready for this.


Mom,

technically we moved out two days ago.


I know, but deep down in my heart

I knew that you kids would come


running back when you hit

that first bump in the road.


Now it feels like

you're moving out for real.

We are.
No more words. Cheyenne, hug your mother.
Oh, heck, give me some of that.
Hey, what's with the love fest, huh?
She kicked us out.
We're all very sad and happy.
We're sappy.
Any news from Barbra Jean?

No, not a thing.

Her broadcast is about to start.

She said if she was gonna take that job

that there'd be a new girl

doing the weather,

so I guess that'll give me my answer.
[Reba] Yeah.

And now it's time for the weather.


But first, I'd like to congratulate

Stormy Clearweather on her new job.


She will be missed

behind the weather desk.


And now for our new weather girl,

Bill from accounting.

Well, I guess I got my answer.

-Sorry, Brock.

-Yeah.

Wow! Life without Barbra Jean.

What is this family gonna do without some

big goofball popping in all the time?

Hey, guys.
Well, we just watched the broadcast.

-I guess you made your decision.

-Yes, yes I have.

I can't believe I'm gonna say this,
but after all you guys have been through,
and how much you meant to each other,
I can't believe you're gonna leave.
Well, I'm just not gonna stand here

and let my best friend

just ruin the rest of her life!

Best friend?
[all] Best friend?
Yes, best friend.

I'm proud to say that Barbra Jean

is my best friend.


It's more of a comment on my sad life

more than anything.

Well, aren't you gonna scream or hug me,
or do something to make me regret this?
I don't know.

You know you, you wait so long

to hear something,


and then when you finally do

you realize it's just no big deal,

you know… [mumbling]
What?
I'm kidding! That's what best friends do.
They kid. Come here, you.

We're best friends,

best friends, best friends, best friends,

best friends, best friends…

Barbra Jean, there's something

I'd like to say to you.


If moving to Little Rock

would make you happy,

then that's what you should do.
I want you to be happy.
I also want you to know that

I love you more than anything else

in the world,

and I still wanna be your husband.
Oh, my goodness.

If you'll have me, I will follow you

to Little Rock, or Budapest,

or anyplace else you wanna go.

-Do you mean that?

-I've never been more serious in my life.

I still wanna be married to you,
because without you there's a hole
where my heart should be.

Oh, my gosh, Brock, that is the most

beautiful thing I have ever heard.


You know anyway,

I'm not going to Little Rock.


-What?

-I used my leverage with the station


and they offered me

the hard news job here.


I am gonna be their new woman

on the street,

and I already have a title for my segment,
"Babs Jansen, Streetwalker."

-So you're not going?

-Reba, I couldn't leave Brock.


You know every marriage

that can be saved, should be.


I can't believe I'm gonna say this either,

but I'm happy for you two.

And I'm happy for you two.

I'm just so happy

that all our lives worked out.

Except for you.

You're all alone.

Cheyenne, she's all alone.

No, I'm not.

No, I'm not. Six years ago

I thought I was cursed.

Turns out that I'm blessed.

Blessed to be in the middle

of the craziest, most dysfunctional,

wonderful life I could imagine.
And I love all of you.

-I love you.

-I love you, too.

[crying] Oh, God.
This is so beautiful. Life's rich pageant.

Let's take a picture of this

so we can have this moment forever.


[Reba] That's a great idea.

Now pull it together.

Pull it together. Come on.

Hey, kids, come on in here.

We're gonna take a picture.


-Everyone smile.

-Yeah.


Dibs. I get to stand

next to Reba, best friends.


[chuckles]

Hey, did you guys hear? Best friends.

[B.J. speaking indistinctly]
Can you believe it, Reba?

Six years ago,

this family was falling apart,


and then I came in

and I just put everything back together.


Barbra Jean, that's not exactly

the way I'd put it.

Hang on, Brock. Barbra Jean's right.

We got through it all

'cause we're survivors.


♪ My roots are planted in the past ♪


♪ Though my life is changing fast ♪


♪ Who I am is who I want to be ♪

[closing theme music playing]