01x07 - In Love With Someone Else

[bunniefuu]

.

- Previously
on vanderpump rules...

- It's been
the most sexually fulfilled

Last two weeks of my life,
let me tell you that.

- This is like
the subliminal messages,

And he's starting having sex
in bathrooms with her.

- Uh, she's not my girlfriend.

- You are so fake!
You're gonna sit here and talk

About how you're not
a ghetto bitch

Yet you're gonna send me
text messages harassing me.

- Oh, I totally did.

- I hate that
you would ever think

That I did not have your back.

- I love you.
- [moans]

- Oh.
- Thank you.

[sighs]

Like, I'm over this bull[bleep].
- All right, I'll handle it.

- Thank you.

I'm just so disgusted
with stassi's behavior.

I get upset.

It's not even, like,
something I can control.

It's just, like, this immediate,
emotional response.

I wanna cry
when I think about it.

- I have to write this
and figure this out.

Pandora is so freakin' mad
at me right now.

- I am so over you calling it
a blog, like, seriously.

- I can't believe
that I have to deal with you.

You should find someone else
to date.

[pop music]

- ♪ you know

♪ that it's our time

♪ these are the best days

♪ of our lives

♪ just raise
your glasses high ♪

♪ this one's
for you tonight ♪

- ♪ down the corner,
and I saw your smile ♪

♪ it takes me back

♪ takes me back
for a while ♪

♪ to a place

- I hope so.

- ♪ I feel like I belong

- Hey, guys.
- Hey! How are you?

- I'm good. How are you?
- Good.

- This is jax.
- How you doin', buddy?

Nice to meet you.
- Hi. Mena.

Welcome.
- First time here.

- This isn't really his thing.

- I saw a burger joint
right over there.

- Oh, yeah?
I'm glad we saved you first.

- [chuckles] she's like, "no,
we're going to do this first."

- He gets mad at me.

He's like, "why don't you
drink coffee?"

I'm like, "I don't know.
I don't need it."

- She doesn't need it,
'cause she's just so--

- She's so healthy and pure.
- [laughs]

- I don't do,
like, the health-type stuff.

I lift weights,
and I go running.

That's the--that's my extent
of working out.

- It is pretty phenomenal.
This type of heat can--

We find it can pull out toxins
a bit more

Than traditional heat
or sweat will.

- What I love about this
is when I get out,

I literally feel--
and I told him--

Like I've had the best orgasm
of my life.

- [laughs]
yeah.

- Like, I just feel like--
[sighs]

- You guys are going in
together, right?

- [laughing]
yeah.

- So, normally, people
come in here--

I mean, do they do
the couple thing?

- Some people are like,
"I'm with my partner."

I will stay in longer if I'm
with somebody just talking,

- Right, right, that's what
I need, 'cause I get so a.D.D.--

- He's so a.D.D.,
he can't even talk to you.

- You wanna try to do
a half hour.

- Half hour?
Both: Yeah.

- Half hour, 45 minutes.
- Oh, my god, okay.

I don't wanna be here.
This is not my thing.

- All right, thanks, guys.
- Thank you.

- If you need anything,
just holler.

- Okay.

Whoa.

How many minutes
have we been here?

- Ten.

- I feel like we've
been here an hour.

[groans]

I'm gonna step out
for a minute.

I'm gonna step out.

- I'm gonna come too.
- [bleep], there's that water.

- We need to go at least
another five minutes.

- We've been
in here two hours.

I could drink these things
all day.

These are great.

Cucumber water's
my new favorite thing.

Don't you wanna go in back in,
or do you wanna call it?

- You can go back in.

- Ten minutes?

[groans]

Um, is this what it's like
talking to your dad?

Is it?
Like, is this how it is?

What?

- I cannot believe
you asked me that, you ass!

My father's in prison!
No, I don't feel--

- Are you working tonight?

So you got the night off
to yourself?

- Can I stay at your place
and watch tv?

Yeah.
- Really?

- Yeah.

You got a huge audition Tuesday.
- Huge audition.

I just wanna lay in bed,
eat food, and read my script.

That's all I wanna do.

- That's perfect.
It sounds like a great Saturday.

- Laura-leigh
is an established actress.

She went to juilliard.
She's very intense.

I mean, she's an actress,

So I think all actors
are a little crazy.

Us hanging out--
she's taking it very seriously,

And it's moving very quickly.

- I need to book something.

- What if you go to new york

For, like, a month
and just get out?

I really think you should.

- I don't know.

- Of course,
I don't want you to go.

I'll miss you and everything,
of course.

- It's not about you.
It's about my career.

- Oh, I understand.

- I know you do.
- I do.

- My heart is still, like...

[hisses softly]

- Oh, my gosh.
There's five minutes left.

I'm just gonna get out early.

[rock music]

- ♪ don't talk to me

♪ like I'm a little girl

♪ like I don't understand
your big words ♪

♪ like I'm too cute
to be that smart ♪

♪

- I have a surprise for you.

- What is it?
Oh, my god!

- Look at my new little sweetie!
- Who is this?

Oh!
Who is this?

- I named her venice,

'cause I was sitting
on venice beach,

Like, having lunch,
and, like, a family

Comes up with a bunch
of puppies.

Oh, my god.
- It's just so cute.

- And I'm like,
"I want the blonde one."

She's just being
a little munchkin.

She's so cute.
Isn't she just--

She's the size of my boob.

- Seriously.

- So frank and I broke up,
so she's my new boyfriend.

Yeah.

- [groans]
- I'm really sad--

Two breakups
in two months.

Like, what the hell?

- Can you tell me
the whole story?

- Yeah.

Um, since frank
got fired at sur,

Like, we just
started fighting.

So it just wasn't working.

- That's crazy.

- He's like,
"I think it's just the idea

Of being with me that you like,
not actually being with me."

That was, like, my big concern,
that this would happen.

- I just didn't realize
I was doing it.

- Yeah.

- But I feel okay
about being on my own,

And, like, I'm excited
to be on my own

And get my [bleep] together,

But I--he was a blessing
at that time.

I needed to have that
right after jax.

It's just I can't be
in a relationship right now.

I never got a chance
to be on my own after jax,

And I jumped into this
relationship so quickly

That I feel content
and at peace

With just doing what I want
and what's gonna make me happy.

You know what, actually,
I am happy about?

I feel like jax
won't be so mean to me now.

Or I'm hoping...

So that we can all get along.

- I try not to push stassi
into doing anything.

I'm trying
to encourage her

To try to work it out with jax.

I think he's gonna
come around.

He's not gonna stay
like this forever.

- Oh, that was good.
What'd you get, by the way?

- You're not gonna like it--
coconut water.

- Coconut water?
- [laughs]

You wanna go to jack in the box?
[laughs]

- Just wanna throw this,
then go.

- Thank you
for coming with me,

And thank you
for putting up with me

And helping me to get clean.

- You're welcome.

So how many days
have you been sober now,

Since the last time?

- Six days.

- So you kind of went--
you went behind my back

And did it
without telling me.

I don't know why people
are saying that, like,

I'm a bad influence.

I mean, you're doing--every time
I've noticed you're drinking,

You're lying to me
about it, "a,"

Which I know--I understand.
That's--

- I told you I would do that.

- I get it.
So you're lying about it.

That's why I'm a little nervous
about you going to my house.

What if I come home and you're--
- but I'm sober!

- Okay.

- I told you--
I relapsed mentally

At, like, my five-month mark,

And I stopped going
to my meetings.

I stopped talking
to my sponsor.

[bleep] went down.

I have no desire
to drink alcohol at all.

I feel great.

Why would I want to lose
this feeling?

It's all me.

- Okay.
- And I'm good.

- All right.
- Let's go.

- ♪ let the music play

[up-tempo music]

♪ let the music play

♪

- Thank you.
Quick second?

- Yes, ma'am.

- Um, can you go get katie?

- Yes, of course.

- Hey.
Don't worry.

You're not in trouble.
- Oh, my god.

- I see that look
on your face.

Hi.
You're in trouble.

You know my friend mohamed?
- Yes.

- I want to have a dinner
for him.

I want beautiful flowers.

I'm gonna get francis
to do some kind of--

Like, a dinner
with many courses.

I want my best servers--you.

I know that--
this is a compliment.

- Yeah, I know.
I am the best.

- No, easy!

So who are we gonna have?
We could have christina.

We could have kelly, jen.

- Maybe scheana?
- Um, maybe scheana.

I need to see
if brandi's coming,

Because that's still
a sensitive situation.

So scheana
is a great waitress,

But to brandi, she will always
be her ex-husband's mistress.

- I was hurt too.

This guy
makes me fall for him,

And then I find out
he has a wife and kids.

- I don't care.

I mean, look at where you are
in your life,

And I'm in such a better place.

I win.
You know what I mean?

- My guests
always come first.

I want everything
to go nice and calmly,

We've had a bit too much
bull[bleep] lately.

- Yeah, the last few weekends.
- A bit too much.

- So I'm holding
yresponsible.

[laughs]

All right,
I'll see you later.

- Thanks.

- I don't want to be in the way
of anything in your life,

But I want to be a part
of your life.

- Let's just slow it down
a little bit.

[up-tempo music]

♪

- Hi!
- Hello.

- Brought a computer
to the pool?

- I have to do my work.

Pandora literally is like,

"you need to send me this stuff
right now."

- There's no wi-fi
on the roof.

- Are you [bleep] me?

Wait, are you serious?
Both: I don't know.

- That's not funny.

Like, this is, like,
fun girls' day while I work.

- Yeah. Well, at least you
can work and drink.

I am a fashion writer,
and I do a column

For lisa's daughter pandora.

I told scheana that I would go
to the pool with her,

And I had to turn in my column,

So I had to multitask.

- Cheers to a fun day.
- Yeah.

- So I take it kristen's
not coming.

- Ah!
Should I text her?

Like, I feel bad. I mean--
- she is already invited.

You don't need
to invite her again.

- No, just to see
if she's coming.

- If no one texted her,
she'll be like,

- Then she shouldn't
be playing stupid games.

Like, "let me not show up
and see if someone texts me."

Why don't you just be an adult,
be a woman,

And show up if you wanna come?

Don't wait for somebody
to re-invite you.

Like, if she's pissed about me
and katie being friends,

When we've been best friends
for, like, two years,

Like, imagine--she is probably
[bleep] her pants

That you and I are friends.

- 'cause we're very similar.

- I know.
You guys are both b*tches.

- I know.
- Nice to meet you.

- Nice to meet you.
- [giggles]

- Peter's gonna have a manager
talk with me

About pulling laura-leigh,
and I'm like--

- What?

- Do I cause problems at work?
No, I don't.

In fact, she comes up
to me at work,

So why don't you go have
a talk with her?

- You're dating your friend's ex
of a week and a half..

When we lived together
for two years.

Did you, like--
and you're ugly.

- [giggles]

- So nice of you
to show up.

- I slept in.
- I said 11:00 a.M.

- I don't know
what to tell you.

- How are you?
- Kind of got hammered.

- Oh, nice.

- I'm still friends
with katie and scheana.

I'm not gonna just rearrange
my schedule

Just to avoid stassi.

This guy was in front of us.

He's like,
"I'm getting you girls sh*ts."

And he's the bartender,
so it was, like, tequila,

Cinnamon whiskey, rum,
something else.

- [bleep] skank.

- You guys are boring!
I just got here.

What's going on?
I'm, like, doing sh*ts.

I thought you were gonna be,

Like, dancing on tables,
and [bleep].

- [laughs]

- I could go with you
to the bar,

If you wanna just go
grab a drink

If he's not going
to come back.

- Yeah.

- Just put your shoes on.
It's so freaking hot.

- I love walking around
in my wedges

With just a bikini on.

- I'm surprised you didn't wear
heels to the pool.

- Okay, we'll be right back.

- See, this is exactly
what I've been--

And she's like, "hey!"
and I'm like, "hey."

Like, totally has been
blowing me off for the last day.

- I don't wanna be rude
or classist.

Or make anyone feel
uncomfortable, so it's like--

I want us all to be able
to have small talk.

I don't need
to be up her ass,

But, like, include me,
do you know what I mean?

Like, I'm making an effort

To make you
feel comfortable, kristen,

So why don't you have
the same decency to me, right?

I'm never gonna say--

Pandora's calling me
right now.

I need wi-fi.
- [laughs]

- Oh, my god, I need wi-fi.

- You haven't opened up
your computer once.

[laughs]

- Ah, [bleep] me
in the butt!

Like, [bleep] me in the butt.
- Is that your new thing--

"[bleep] me in the butt"?
- I don't know.

There's no point in me answering
pandora's call right now.

And I'm doing everything I can
to turn in my things.

Can I have another one
of those tequila drinks?

Thank you.

- Okay, welcome, everybody.

The first step is admitting
to your innermost self

That we admit we are powerless
over whatever

And that our lives
have become unmanageable

Because of this fixation

On alcohol, dr*gs,
etcetera, etcetera.

Tyler, do you wanna share
about step one?

- Yeah. When I realized
that I was centering

My entire existence around--
"will I be able

To get what I need
and still function?"

I had to make a change.

I think that when
I don't have that power at all,

Then I'm much more free.

- And would you
like to share next?

- Yeah, I'll share.
- And your name is?

- Laura-leigh.

I started drinking
when I was 12

And then got into meth
really heavily.

And I mean, my life
was out of control.

I was robbing my family's house

And selling all of our stuff
to pawnshops.

Like, it was really, really bad.

- I really didn't know
what I was walking into.

- I do everything as hard
as I can do it,

As fast as I can do it,

And yet, I'm still...

Convinced that I can have
a glass of wine.

- I knew some of the things
she's done, but I was in shock.

I didn't realize
it was to that extent.

I didn't realize
it was that heavy.

Can I talk to you?
Can we talk for a second?

- Mm-hmm.
Can I have a kiss?

- Mm-hmm.
- What's up?

- I don't know
if it was the right time

To bring up my feelings,

But now is as good a time
as any, you know?

Usually, she told me
after a meeting, she felt good.

I feel like--

I like you a lot.
You know that, right?

I do.
I like you a lot.

But for--in order for us
to grow, I think--

You know, I just got
out of a two-year relationship.

Like, I'm--
like, the pain's still wet,

And I have nothing--
I don't have feelings--

That--like, I'm still--

Spending every single day
together,

I think, might be
a little bit much

In the beginning.

I just get working
on going here and going here.

I have you now,
and it's--

I'm just trying
to fit it all in, okay?

I just don't want
to jump into it.

- I'm so uncomfortable
right now.

I need to go for a walk.
I need to go for a walk.

- ♪ hoo ooh

♪ hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo

- ♪ here we go again

- It's a full-time job
to date somebody

That's an alcoholic
or to be in a relationship

With somebody
that's an alcoholic.

I don't wanna be
constantly wondering

If I'm gonna come home
to you passed out

Or my stuff missing
from my house.

Listen...

Listen, will you talk
to me for a second?

Will you talk to me
for a second?

I just wanna make sure
we don't rush into things.

Do you understand?

Sorry. I thought
it was a good time.

Maybe it wasn't.
- It wasn't a good time.

It was a stupid [bleep] time.

Well, do you want it
to go somewhere?

- You know what I want?

I want to be able to miss you,
you know what I'm saying?

Like, go a couple days,
and like, "god, I miss her.

"I wanna see her.
Like, I miss her.

I can't wait to see her.
It's been a couple days."

Like, I have never had that!
I feel like--

- I know what you're saying,

And I'm not disagreeing
with you.

I get up in the morning,
go get coffee, walk the dogs.

- I'm not disagreeing with you.
- We're doing stuff

That a married couple do
in, like, 20 years.

When I date, I rush things.

I, like, jump right
into girlfriend-boyfriend mode,

And I skip
the whole dating part.

We don't even get
to know each other.

Then you come to find out,
like,

"well, I didn't even know
that about you."

And then you start fighting,
and then you wanna know why,

Because you missed
the whole dating part,

And that happens
to me all the time.

- I don't want to be
a roadblock for you.

I don't want to be in the way
of anything in your life,

But I want to be a part
of your life.

I like you a lot.

- All I'm saying is...

Let's just slow it down
a little bit, not--

As far as, like, us--
our intimate times,

I don't wanna slow that down.
[laughs]

That's fine.
I love that.

All right, let's go.

- Giggy.

- Mother!

- Hello, darling.
- Hello!

- I'm in here.
I'm just making tea.

I know.
I'm not even dressed.

- Nice outfit.
- I know, right?

- Hi, baby cake.

- I feel, like, lazy
still being in my robe.

- Love this house.

- So fill me in.
Tell me what's going on.

- I think we might have a little
bit of a problem, but...

- What kind of problem
are we talking about?

- Stassi.

- She's not doing
what she's supposed to do.

- You know, she started writing
a few months ago

For the website.

She's supposed to be giving me
two columns a week--

Her fashion column.
When she's good, she's good.

It's a great column.
Everybody loves it.

It's got really good response.
- And she's excited about it?

- Yeah, I mean, that's what she
wants to do with her life,

Is be a fashion writer.

Suddenly, I haven't had
a column from her

In two months,
close to two months, yeah.

- But why are you bothering
with her?

- I mean, I know stassi
very well.

She's interned for me.

She writes for me.
She's one of my friends.

I've worked with her.

- I'm starting
to feel that--this--

The "pain in the ass" factor

Is far outweighing
her useful factor.

That's where I'm at.

- That's why I told her
to come here today.

I was like,
"this is your last chance."

If she doesn't start
writing for me,

I think she doesn't respect me,
and I'm not gonna defend her.

- Okay, well,
then you tell her that.

I'm so upset with her.
[door closes]

That's gonna be her now
coming in.

- Take the sex monster.
- Take the sex monster.

- I make allowances
for stassi at sur

Because she's working
with pandora,

But if she's not working
with pandora, what do we have?

- It's just over there.
- Pandy, pandy.

Thank you.

- [sighs] okay, so kind of
what I've heard

Is you've dropped the ball.

- It's been a rough two months.

- But at the same time,
it's also one

Of the most important times
for the website.

As of right now, I feel like
you're not taking

Your column seriously

And you're not taking me
seriously,

Because I have 25 to 35 people
working for me

Who take me seriously.

And right now you say you wanna
be a fashion writer,

And you say that this is
what you want for your career,

And I haven't seen it.

- Coming up...

Stassi, I mean it--
there is no more bull[bleep],

And if you can't deliver,
we will replace you.

- As of right now,
I feel like

You're not taking
your column seriously,

And you're not taking
me seriously,

Because I have 25 to 35 people

Working for me
who take me seriously,

And right now you say
you wanna be a fashion writer,

And you say that this is what
you want for your career,

And I haven't seen it.

To be a fashion writer,
you have to write.

To have a recurring
fashion column,

- I've made a lot of allowances
for you at work as well

Because you're pandy's friend,

But you're very close
to losing your job at sur.

Stassi, I mean it--
there is no more bull[bleep],

'cause we can't put up
with it anymore,

And if you can't deliver,
we will replace you.

- [sniffles]
I fell off track.

It's just been
a rough two months,

And I don't even
wanna say that,

'cause it just sounds
like me making excuses.

- Do you think
that you can go forward?

- Yes, I know I can.
I know I can.

I'm upset and disappointed
in myself right now

For letting
these past two months

Interfere
with what was what I wanted

And what I wanted
to accomplish and do.

Like, I'm disappointed
in myself.

- Well, I'm disappointed
in you as well

In the way you've handled
some situations, to be honest.

I'm not making this personal,
but I was upset.

The text that you sent
to laura-leigh--

That's not the girl I know,

Because that was being
way too bitchy.

It was almost to the point
of bullying, stassi, and--

- I know I was bullying.
- Right, but that's not good.

That's not good.

- I am furious
with this person.

I've never hated someone
so much in my life.

I've never felt so betrayed
by a friend

In my entire life, ever.

- Yeah, but you walked away
from jax.

- It doesn't matter.

She's my friend, and a week and
a half later she's dating him?

She just turns out to be
the most disloyal human being

I've ever met.
[sniffles]

- Look...

Look...

Can you pull it together now?
- Yes, I can pull it together.

- Are you sure?
- I promise you.

- Okay, I'm gonna give you
another chance, okay?

- Okay.
- This is it, stassi.

- I know.
- Don't let us down, stassi.

- I'm not gonna let you down.
I promise.

- 'cause those big baby blues
don't work on me.

- [laughs]
- well, they clearly do.

Otherwise--
- they work on my dad.

Go try him.
- Yeah, yeah.

- Here you go.
You can have a cuddle.

Both: Aw.
- Come on, sex monster.

- Come here.

- Okay, come on, then.
Let's do it.

- Okay.

[up-tempo music]

♪

- Nice ass.
- Thanks.

- Sagittarius?
- Libra.

- Oh, okay.
- [laughs]

- You guys wanna go right here?
- Wait, watch this.

- [laughs]

It's a good thing
that you guys are focused.

All right, should we attempt
to work out or what?

- Yeah, let's do this.

- This is a good workout, guys.
- I can't believe--aah!

I can't believe you hung out
with katie last night--

Just you and her alone?

That sounds not fun.
- It was great.

- You don't hang out with your
girlfriend by yourself, ever.

- It was a great night.
It was a success.

- Well, then there's no
fighting, so it's not fun.

- [laughs]

- If there's not fighting,
there's no point.

- Kristen used to tell me
all the time,

Like, "oh, my god,
jax is such a good boyfriend."

Did katie used to say that
to you?

- Yeah. You make us look bad.
- Yeah, dude.

You set the bar too high,
but then you lower--

- That's the problem.
I set it too high too quickly.

That's what I always do
in my relationships.

I set the bar real high.

I'm like [bleep] prince charming
in the beginning.

- At one point,
you had a sheet for a wall.

You were broke,
living month-to-month,

Yet you were still having sex

With some of the most beautiful
women I've ever seen.

Both:
And some of the trashiest.

- And I said,
"jax, what's your secret?"

And you know what he told me?
- What?

- He said, "tom, I just tell
them what they want to hear."

- He did not say it like that.

- [laughs]

It would backfire.
You're like, "listen, I gotta--"

Like, here's the thing.
I did it again with laura-leigh.

I pulled laura-leigh aside
the other day.

I go, "listen, let's slow
it down a little bit."

She did not like that.
- Ooh.

- Oh.

- I go, "I like you,
but obviously,

"my track record
is not good

With jumping
into relationships fast."

I really do like laura-leigh,
but I just think

I'm going about this
for the wrong reasons.

I'm leading somebody else on,

And it's not
what I wanna do.

- She's, like, the first girl

That you've hooked up
with since stassi.

It's, like, of course
there's gonna be a bit

Of, like, symptoms
of rebound.

- Man, I was in
a two-year relationship

That I still have
emotional feelings for,

And, like, anytime I see her,
it's, like, still kind of

As I don't wanna be there, as
much as I don't wanna be in it,

I still have an emotional
attachment to her, obviously.

- This is my take
with stassi, okay?

I mean, I will never,
ever, ever trust that girl.

Stassi comes across
as a very possessive person.

She must regard men that she's
had past relationships with

As almost like a possession
or something.

- Okay, but, yeah, but you
didn't date her for two years.

You didn't live with her.

So of course you're not going
to be invested emotionally.

I am,
you know what I'm saying?

I get where you're coming from,

And that's how I would be with,
like, say kristen or katie,

Obviously, I didn't show it
the right way, so I screwed up.

I'm not gonna--
- I felt like you showed it.

- I'm taking the blame.
- Take it day by day.

- Uh-oh.
- Dude.

Did you really just say that?

- There he is again
with his one-liners--

Day by day.
- That one slipped out.

- [laughs]
- I'm sorry.

- I'm having a good breakthrough
in my life,

And he's like,
"just take it day by day."

[mellow music]

- ♪ does anyone know
the reason ♪

♪ why people
act so strange ♪

♪ depending on the way
the wind blows ♪

- So you're gonna be
one through six.

Uh, danielle...

- Oh, you've gotta be kidding me
right now.

Why are you doing this
to me?

Come on, peter.

- Laura-leigh wants
to be inside.

- She wants to be with me?

- She wants to be
in the main room.

- She wants to ask out
all of my boyfriends,

Take my dog,
take my section,

And then hang out
with me after?

Come on, peter, it's gonna be
awkward for everyone.

- I have to give people sections
based on, you know,

What they deserve, not who's
sleeping with who's boyfriend.

- Please.

- No.

- Tonight's gonna suck.

[electronic music]

♪

- Look...

I could really care less
what you think about me.

- Then why are you sitting here
right next to me?

- Because I'm also not gonna not
stick up for myself.

I don't know why everyone's
afraid of you.

Like, I'm not.
I'm not afraid of you at all.

- You are.
You look very nervous right now.

- Yeah, we'll I'm not.
You aren't a princess, stassi.

You are a "spooled" little brat.
- A "spooled"?

- Yeah, you're a spoiled,
selfish--

- Oh, spoiled!
Oh, okay.

She's a crazy-ass,
single, white female stalker.

[in high-pitched voice]
and talks like this,

And, "um, I didn't really know,
like, uh--"

I really don't have anything
to say to you, so go away.

- If you don't have anything
to say to me,

Then stop [bleep] texting me
night after night after night.

You need to take your victim
tampon out of your ass

And take some responsibility.

You don't even have the balls
to come up to my face.

- You are pathetic, and the
reason why I don't confront you

To your face is because
I have zero respect for you.

And you do anything that I do.
- No.

- I'm sorry
that you're insecure

That jax and I have a history.

- I'm not insecure
about it at all.

- You are. Why are you even
wasting your time on me?

- We're dating.
- You're not exclusive.

It's pathetic.

You know, the other day,
he texted me

And said,
"you look so beautiful.

I think about you
all the time."

I even have it
on my phone.

He was literally telling me
how much he misses me.

- Okay, well,
he can tell you that,

Because I'm the one
he's [bleep] every night.

- I would feel really degraded

If I was having sex
with somebody

Who's telling somebody else
that they miss them.

That's sad
and embarrassing.

Okay, so I'm glad
we cleared that up.

Be off.

- So you can stop texting me.

You can stop texting the man
that I'm seeing.

- Not exclusively.

- I can't believe you guys
aren't working--you know that?

I'm still missing you.
Outside--go.

- I'll go home.
I don't care.

If you want me to go home
tonight, I'll go home tonight.

- Just go outside right now.

Okay, let's go back to table,
feed the table.

Let's go.

- That was just really intense,

And I don't want anything else
happening tonight.

If it's okay if I leave...

If that's okay with you?

- It is a Friday night.
You know how busy we are, no?

- No, I know.
It's just that was insane.

- How about you
take a little break?

I mean, I understand
the situation--it was bad.

- Laura-leigh came up to me--
- yes, I understand that.

It's a Friday night, baby.

- No, I know.
- Okay, all right, okay, okay.

You go, you go.
- Thank you very much.

I really appreciate it.
- You go home.

- Um, thank you.

- Coming up...

- Like, do you understand
what I'm saying?

- I don't want this type
of drama on the floor.

- Okay, no, I'm not gonna stay
here to work in the restaurant.

- Okay.

[rock music]

- Hey.
- Hey.

- Well, they found out
he was british.

- I'm serious.
- We are allies, remember that.

My son max has become
good friends with tom,

And they're both
very serious musicians.

So I'm happy to see them
kicking ass at the viper room.

Good luck.
- He'll do good.

- You're carding me?

Come on,
I'm older than 21.

- Make some noise!
[cheering]

- Watch max kick some ass.

- Yeah!
[cheers and applause]

[rock music]

♪

- Whoo!

♪

- It's incredible
to see the kids supporting max

And validating something
that he's passionate about.

It's my son
finding his dream.

It's amazing.

I love you.
- I love you too.

- All right.

[up-tempo jazz]

- What's going on? 'cause
I just looked at the schedule--

- Well, jennifer
canceled on us.

- Okay, and now I'm hearing
that I'm coming over here.

If you're over here,
who's covering me over there?

- Scheana's taking
your shift tonight.

- Yeah, well, but lisa doesn't
want her working this party,

'cause brandi's
gonna be here.

- 'cause I can't be the only,
like, server--

- No.

- Hey, scheana.
- So I need someone else.

- So are you
on your way right now?

And you're gonna
be covering kristen,

'cause I know
that you were told--

No, you're coming in
to cover kristen,

'cause I know you were told

That you were gonna be working
lisa's party.

However, brandi's
gonna be here.

Well, I'll tell you what--
come in,

And then we'll figure it out
from there.

Okay, awesome.

She seems aggravated.

- Did you grow these flowers
in your garden?

- I wish.
- [laughs]

- Downtown.


- These are really pretty.

- Okay, what was
that phone call about?

- Here's the problem.
Brandi's gonna be at the party,

And lisa doesn't want you
serving the party.

- I changed my entire schedule
to stay.

- All I know is
that she doesn't want you there,

- Yeah, well, then
I don't wanna be here.

I'm not covering kristen's shift
working in the restaurant

So she can work the party.

Like, do you understand
what I'm saying?

It's bull[bleep].

- I understand,
and I sympathize,

But you might as well just make
some money while you're here.

I mistakenly
scheduled scheana,

So I'll take the blame
for it.

It was my fault, but scheana's
totally overreacting.

I don't want this type of drama
on the floor.

- Okay, no, I'm not gonna stay
here to work in the restaurant.

- Okay.
- [sighs]

[door slams]

- [sniffles]
I'm over this [bleep].

I'm done.

[sniffles]

- Open up.
It's me.

What's going on here?

Scheana, this is ridiculous.

- I know, I just--
this is the whole point

Of why I sat down
with brandi,

So things like this
don't keep happening.

- It's too soon.
Come--come out here.

It's too soon.

- Like, I missed
a very important audition today

So I could be here
to work your dinner...

- I can't do that to brandi.
- 'cause it was so important.

- Then why did they
tell me it

Was so important
that I had to be here?

- Scheana, I cannot put you
on the table.

- I know.
I understand that.

- Kristen, can you cover
the restaurant?

- I can do whatever you like.
- She can do whatever.

- Thank you.
Thank you.

Come on, out of here.
That's enough of this.

For you to be crying,
this is ridiculous.

It is ridiculous.

- It's just--it's frustrating,
because I talked to her.

I apologized.
- I know.

I don't want this to happen

Every shift I work
when she's here.

Like, it sucks.
- I understand that.

I do understand that,
but it's only been

A couple of weeks, and she
hasn't been here since then.

Feelings are running too high.

It's too fresh.
It's too raw.

I'm not going to put brandi
in that situation

Where she feels uncomfortable
with scheana.

Scheana has to understand
that my guests come first.

- [sniffles]

[line trilling]

- Hello?

- Hey, I'm gonna need you
to come get me,

Like, right now, please.

I can't stay and work.
This is, like, ridiculous.

- All right,
I'm in the car already.

- Okay, thanks.
Bye.

- You've got enough?

- It's just me, peter, and tom.

- That's right.
That's fine for that.

- Okay.
- Trust me, it's fine.

Just get on with it
and make sure it works, okay?

[up-tempo music]

♪

- Are you being serious?
- No, I'm being serious.

[indistinct chatter]

- Can I talk to you
for a second?

- Wanna sit right here?

- Yeah, yeah, just--I'm not
gonna take a long time.

I know we have to work.
I just, um--

[clears throat] first off,
I just wanted to say

This is extremely,
extremely difficult for me.

[sighs] it's been hard.
I don't sleep well.

I'm not happy
the way things are--I'm not.

All I'm saying is just,
basically, hear me out,

And just keep me
in the back of your mind

And just know that...

I really, truly, wholeheartedly
wanna prove myself to you.

- Okay, I can't take you
seriously

When there's another girl
in the picture.

You have a girlfriend!
- I don't have a girlfriend.

- Yes, you do.

It is what it is with her.
She was a mere distraction.

I was just so upset,
and I'm--and I'm...

I'm still upset.

I hated the way things ended.
I hated it.

And I'm sure
you're not happy either,

And I was a terrible,
terrible boyfriend, terrible.

And I know that.
I know the things I've done.

I just--I just want you
to know

That--that I really--

I want to be
your friend again.

I wanna prove to you
and earn your trust back,

Which is so broken,
and it's so battered

To the ground right now,
I know that,

But I'm trying
to better myself.

I know I can be the person
that you want.

I know I can.

- Like, I'm so sick
of, like, hearing,

Like, words,
like, over the past two years--

Words, words, words, words.

- [sighs] it's just, you know,
the girl that I love,

That I--first girl
that I thought,

"I'm gonna marry this girl,

Seeing her with somebody else,
it just k*lled me.

Listen--k*lled me.

Like, I--

I mean, I even--
I said to my family,

"this is the girl
I'm gonna marry one day.

I'm gonna marry her."

- I just--I can't be
in a relationship with you.

I don't--

I'm not saying
there's not a chance ever again.

I don't know--
a year, two year--

I don't know
if you prove to me

Being my best friend
that you've changed.

- That's all I wanted.

Knowing that there's--
I could get you again

Is just enough for me
to keep going.

The first day I met you,
I moved in with you in two days

'cause I knew I loved you.

I wanted to spend every moment
with you.

- 'cause I'm the best thing
that ever happened to you--duh.

Like, I'm over men
treating me like [bleep].

Like, I'm now having
the mentality--[bleep].

I'm amazing,
and I'm gonna wait

To have somebody
appreciate that.

I'm sick of this.

I'm so sick
of being treated like [bleep].

I'm so sick of it.

[crying] so, yeah, like, I
appreciate you saying all this,

And it's so nice
to finally hear it,

But it's, like, I've been
waiting for this

For, like, two years.

I've been waiting
for this for two years.

I don't know
what to say now.

I don't know what to say.

- I don't want you
to say anything--I know.

I just want the chance
to fix it.

I just want the chance
to fix it,

Not all at once,
just little by little...

- That would take
a really long time.

- And I'm gonna be here
the whole time,

Or I would've checked out.

I'm sorry. I wouldn't move away.
I wouldn't do that.

If I got the job
of a lifetime tomorrow,

I wouldn't move away.

And make no money so that I can
at least be next to you.

I want to propose to you one day
how you should be proposed.

I even--

I've been thinking all kinds
of crazy things.

I want it all, and I want
to give it to you,

And I'm gonna give it to you,

And I'm not gonna ever be
with anybody again

Until I get you back.

I still love you
very, very much.

I miss you.

- We're about
to get fired, so...

- I know.

- Coming up...

- [bleep] you.

You're not gonna bully me
out of here

And neither
is that whore.

[up-tempo music]

♪

- You have been
with me every day,

From the time we woke up
to the time we went to bed,

And then all of a sudden,

You just stop texting me,
stop calling me,

And expect me not to want
an explanation?

- I can't talk
about stuff like this.

- You don't even have
the respect for me

To give me an explanation.

- Here's the thing--
I just wanna let it go.

- That's emotionally abusive.

I'm trying to find the other
ingredient for this drink.

I'm not doing this at work.

- You don't have a choice,

'cause you won't do it
any other time.

- Cool.
I nailed it.

That's good.
Yeah.

- Thank you.
- Sure.

- I'm not having this argument
right now.

- It's not an argument.
It's a conversation.

- [clears throat]
- you can't keep bowing out.

You can't keep cowarding out
of this conversation.

- Are you really gonna do this
with people here?

- How are you guys doing today?
- Doing good.

- Sorry, we were dating,
and he just, like, stopped

Talking to me,
but didn't give me a reason

Or an explanation.

- This is great.
This is great.

- He doesn't want you
to know

That he's
a horrible human being.

- Thanks, guys.

- So you have no excuse,
no reason, nothing?

- Okay, do you want me
to hang out with you still

While I'm in love
with someone else?

- You're a coward.
You are a coward.

- [clears throat]
I just--

- I deserve, out of respect,
a [bleep] conversation,

And you can't bully me
out of here.

You can both be [bleep] to me,
but guess what.

I'm not leaving.
You're stuck with me.

You're gonna have to deal
with me every [bleep] day

Until I book a job,
and I'm out of here.

And then when I'm walking
on the red carpet

And I've got my own tv show,
you're gonna look at me,

And you're gonna say,
"I should've been nice to her."

Because guess what.
I never gave up on you.

- Listen, I hope that for you.
I hope you do well.

That's what I hope you do.

- I hope you both do well,
but you're terrible people.

You don't have the balls
to just be like,

"look, I used you."
- I didn't use you.

It just--I liked
what was happening.

- Okay, can I just have
a tall glass really fast?

- I liked what was going on,
but at the end of the day,

Regardless of the situation,
I'm not getting back with--

I'm still in love
with somebody else.

- I don't care
if you marry her.

- I just don't understand

Why you'd wanna come at me
like that.

- Out of respect, I deserve you
to say to my face,

"I'm in love with her.

I can't talk or see you or
hang out with you ever again."

- I'm in love with her.

I can't talk or see
or hang out with you ever again.

- Why can't you do that?

- I was trying to do that,
but you kept cutting me off,

Or you kept saying--
whatever.

I'm not gonna make an excuse.
- Yeah, blame it on me.

- I didn't have a conversation
with you

Out of respect
of my ex-girlfriend, okay?

She asked me
to just step aside--

- Okay, hey!

"sorry I've been [bleep] you
every day without protection

"and been inside of you and told
you really intimate things

"every day,
but guess what.

"I don't have enough respect
for you

To tell you that I'm never
gonna talk to you again."

[bleep] you,

And thank you
for taking the time

Because your passive-aggressive
way of ending our relationship

Really took some balls.

You are an [bleep].
That is what you are.

That's what everyone
told me that you were,

And you're not gonna bully me
out of here

And neither
is that whore.

I'm gonna be here,
and you're [bleep] stuck with me

Until I book a job.

- Next time on the season finale
of vanderpump rules...

- Anybody got any socks for jax?

[laughter]

- Come on.
- Let's have a look.

- Now, girls,
I need a kiss.

- On the lips?

- I just--I wanted to resolve
everything with brandi.

- It's not necessarily resolve.

- This is gonna be really hard
for me to say.

- What did I ever do to you,
like, to deserve this?

What did I do?