03x02 - Ready, Set, Don't Drive

[bunniefuu]

You're doing good there, bud.

Driving like a real pro.

You may wanna show down here just a touch.

We're gonna die, we're gonna die, we're gonna die.

No problem Daddy, you're the boss.

I know what i'm doing old man.
Stick a sock in it.

You're gonna ace that driver's test.

Just focus on the road and stay calm.

I'm gonna throw up!

I will daddy, don't you worry.
That driver's licence is practically already in my hand.

And then I'll nerver have to drive with
your parental paranoid boy again.

Seatbell, check.

Side view mirror check.

Guy in side view mirror ...
check him out.

Is it too much to ask people to clean up after their dog?

Is that part of the test, 'cause
it was not in the manual.

I mean look at this.

Ew... Ew... I'll have to.

You know may be you could wipe
that off outside my brand new...

car, too late.

Let's get going.
We're overbooked and I'm all backed up.

Wish I could say the same for the dog!

Both hands on the wheel please.

Head inside the car please.

and close the window, I'm fighting a cold.

But the smell?

It doesn't bother me, thanks for asking.

Look at that, It's already yellow.

OK, that's it.

Get out of my car!

Take your snotty nose and
your stinky toes with you!

On the bright sight, I used my
blinker before I pulled over.

But it's not end in the world.
They'll let you take the test again in two weeks.

I know, but it's so not fair!

The only good thing is you're the only one
that I actually told I was doing the test.

Aha ...

What did you do?

well....

Here comes Miley Stewart
she passed her driver test.

She's kicking it behind the wheel
not walking like the rest.

- She can drive it home
- Say what, say what

- I said, she can drive it home
- Say what, say what

Word and respect. Your road.

I may have mentioned it to Oliver.

So, first kid in our class to hit the highway,
tell us all about it!

Well... I... you know....

Driving I personally think is overrated ...

And It hurts our planet ...

And not driving now that takes some courage!

I don't think I'm gonna drive today or tomorrow

That's how strongly I feel!

You know that is just about the
stupidest thing that I've ever heard.

Ok! Listen up, I'm only gonna say this once
-The truth about it is ...

Hey, Has anybody seen Amsber?

Oh wait! There she is driving her brand
new car with her brand new license.

Look! Look, It's canary yellow
with matching leather seat....

Which is tacky ... really really tacky.

Yes, Yes, I know what you are thinking.
Isn't she fabulous!

- Raise your hand if you wish you're me.

I do ... I do.

That's it? Only one hand.

You know what? You're all just jelous,
because I got my license before you guys

Yep, First in the class.

Oh no, You're not...

Oh boy! walk.

Don't you ... go ahead, Miley.
Why don't you tell her?

Ha... ha... funny story.

Help me!

I'm waiting!

she's not to answer you!

Yeah! I don't.
You're wanna know why?

Bring it on, baby!

Because this is American, that's why!

Yeah!

And in this country people have rights.

And another something called freedom of speech...

or not to speech!

Yeah, She failed, didn't she?

Back to you, baby.

No, I did not fail.

Oh... well, Then I guess that you'll be
driving to the big North Beach party tonight.

Ofcouse that ... that's tonight?

Is there a problem?

- No

- Yes

Oh boy!

I wonder if she like my rap?

Daddy! I have got to drive to that party tonight!

You have to convince them to let me retest the test.

You know, use that: "Well hello darling",
Oh chuck, southern thing of yours.

You know, like you do when you want the lady
at the grocery store use your expired coupons.

Hey Miles, Do you really think if I
could convince DMV at anything

I'd still have this for driver's license photo?

Yeah, I was in the middle of sneeze,
when they took the picture,

now everytime I show my ID, I gotta go ...

Well, at least ... can drive!

Honney, I know you're dispointed,
but you can retake the test in the couple weeks.

And until then your borhter can drive you around.

No, no, no, no, no ....

Why, why, why, why, ....

You, you, you, you ....

Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch ...

See, I told to you he wanna do.

Daddy, please.

Oh, come on baby, rules are rules.

You're just gonna have to wait.

You're right.

There is nothing else that I can do.
but you know... wait and, wait and, wait ...

until you can't hear me anymore..

Hey Lily, meet me at the bus stop.
This girl is getting her license.

Hey dad, there look at this.
I just find the picture of me when I was six months old.

Sweet, cuddly and so so happy...

and then you ruined it by having that little devil child..

You gotto learn to laugh at life's little difficulties.

And speaking of little difficulties,

We have a houseguest.

Hello, Robby.

No, no, no, no, no ....

Why, why, why, why, ....

You, you, you, you ....

Hey, His parents were out of town for the weeken.
So I said he could stay with us.

Look son, he's folks are nice people. beside ...

helping out a neighbor is what life's about

Ok, old man, what did they give you?

Laker tickets, court side.

feels so good on the open soars

May be I should head out for VIP parking.

You really think that they're gonna let
you retake the test on the same day?

They have to!

If I don't drive myself to that beach party tonight.
My life will be miserable.

What are you talking about?
You're ... Hannah Montana.

Nah, That doesn't count.

Ok, I'm just going to tell the lady what happened.
Look at that sweet face.

She would definitely make an exception.

No!

Rules are rules, Bargo!

I'm the governor of California.

And I'm the Qeen of this window.

Your appointment was scheduled for 12.20 is 12.22

Your appointment has been terminated.

That's right, I went there.

I'll be back.

Not for the next two weeks, you won't. Next!

I'm so dead!

Yeah, Honey, Please, the hannah concert is sold out.

If mommy could get you better
seats you know that she would.

And Hannah is very much alive!

Uhm ha? Next.

- Hello
- Oh my god, It's Hannah Montana!

Today I'm not an international pop sensation.

I'm just another citizen here to take my driver test.

How refreshing is that? Standing in the line,
waiting her turn, she's just a regular ....

Why are you talking?

I don't know

Oh, no

I must have left my paperwork at home and

grabbed these complimentary
backstage passes by mistake.

Whatever will I do now?

Oh, you don't worry.
You talented little Hannah about that.

- I'll be just a minute
- Sure

Wait a minute, Let's say you do get the license.

How are you going to drive to that party
without your dad noticing your car's missing?

Simple. Every Friday night Daddy goes to the gym,
runs on the treadmil for 10 minutes

and then spends the rest of the night
rewarding himself at Busko's House of Chicken Pie.

He should be leaving right about now.

hey, please, don't leave me alone with ... that.

I've got a big swim meet this weeken.

You wouldn't beleive the difference it makes in the butterfly.

- Sorry son, every man for himself
- No!

sometimes I lie to the goverment just

to get my license to drive a car.

And now I'm on the way to the party

to see Amsber and scrubs her face in ah na ... ah

Not good!

License, please.

Yes sir, is there problems, officer...

... Dairia?

It's Diaria

Ofcouse it is! my bad.

Your turn the signal's been on
for the last mile and a half. .

Oh, my face's red.
You're very good in your job.

They should make you captain.

I'll write a letter, thanks so much for your help.

It's been great work with you. bye bye.

No, not so fast miss!

First, explain to me why your
license says "Hannah Montana"?

Oh, that's just because ...
sweet niblets!

No! Please! I just changed my name to Hannah Monata,

'cause I'm a really big fan.

You know, it would happen to you too,
if you were famous. I mean

Los Angelus would be flooded with Diaria's.

It's Diaria.

I knew that! And I'm really sorry!

You just got to beleive me, that I...

or not.

Maybe sometime in here,
help you remember the truth.

I can't stay in here!

I... I... I... gotta potty.

Right there.

Not this lifetime!

Please, just call my daddy cell phone,
he'll clear all up for me.

I'll be grounded for like three years,

At least I'll have a bathroom with a door
and the cursy toilet seat that says
come on over and show this about

What's the number?

Look, I'm sorry, I didn't know when I invited
you over then I would get stuck ...

babysitting.

I think that's last week's lamb chop!

I'm sorry, You're just not worth it.

Wait, no! I made clam dip!

Heyo!

Hello, This is officer Diaria, down at Malibu PD.

Have a girl here, says she's your daughter
and claims to be Hannah Montana

What?

Is Hannah Montana your daughter?

Yes, ofcourse.
She lives with me and my wife Shikera!

Now, prank somebody else.
You're k*lling Rico's beauty buzz

Ok, You have jerked me around
for two years and I'm sick of it.

Whatever friendship we had is over.

What did he say?

He said I was k*lling Rico's beauty buzz.

Rico!

You are in a lot of troubles here, miss.

Until I can figure out exactly who you are.
You'll have to kiss your cushion toilet seat good bye.

You've got to beleive me! Come back!

Ok, the truth is...

My real name is Miley Stewart.

I'm just a regular girl, who's secretly pop star,
but hide it so she can live a normal life.

it's best of both world. Get it? Cute huh?

Where do you kids come up with these ridiculous ideas?

I blame television.

Please, you've gotta beleive me!
I'm Hannah Montana, ask me anything about her.

Alright, If you're gonna stick to this idiot story,

There's only one thing left for me to do.

She's in here.

You know what you have to do.

I'm gonna enjoy this!

Oh yeah!

Who is it?

My daughter. The ultimate Hannah fan.

If you can convince her you're Hannah Montana.
I'll let you go.

Ofcouse! That willl be easy.

What do you want to know, sweetie?

Don't "sweetie" me, punk!

December 19, 2007 Hannah performed where?

Hartbrough Civic Centre.

- What did she open with?
- Rock Star

- Close with?
- Best of both world



Don't go anywhere this ain't gonna take long

- Oh no, I'm just getting started
- Hannah not-Tana

In between Pump up the Party and I Got Nerve,

Hannah said "I love the you, Connecticut"
and then winked at the audience.

What eye did she use?

Which eye? Are you kidding me?

- Do I look like I'm kidding? Hu..h

Sweet kid you got there.
Who's her mother? Godzilla?

Mommy please, you have to come home early.

Jackson doesn't want me here anymore.

No, Mammy, It's my fault.

Why am I such a jerk to the people I care most about?

Bravo!

- Jackson, What are you doing?

You're right!
Like that's really mummy on the phone.

She can hear you.

Oh yeah, Well wait till she hear this.

Well hey there pretty mumma.

You wanna come over for a game of hide and seek?
I'll let you find me my sweet little cherio

Oh! Oh no! No, no, I didn't know!
But no ... I had no idea ...

Shame on you!

Just tell her I'm sorry,
and you can stay here as long as you want, ok?

In fact, I'll take the coatch.

I'll even clean my room for you.

Nice work, Mummy.

Together we're unbeatable.
woa ..ha ..a ..a

November 4, 2006 Hannah,
jumps on a paparazi's back outside of a Trendy club

What's the head line in Los Angelos Herald?

Ah... I known this... Hannah wild ride! Bam!

March 17, 2005 Sunset boulevar.
Billboard goes up of Hannah with a zit on her face

- Was it on her cheek or her chin?
- my cheek.

No... my chin.

It had to be my cheek, I always...

It was my cheek! bam bam!

It was her forehead.
Bang bang, Jerky and ham

We're done here.
- Listen!

Dont't do the crime,
if you can do the time. Oh yeah!

You get the limo out front, uh .. ah.. uh

hottest style, every shoe, every color

yeah, when you're famous, it can be kind of fun

It's really you but no one ever discovered

Oh, It really is you.

Alright, Alright.
I've had enough of that! get off me.

You cannot tell anyone about this, Ok?

Otherwise, I can't be Hannah anymore.

We can't let that happen.

No, we can't.
Now go tell your daddy to let me out of here.

so I can get home before my dad fights out.

Daddy's little convict say what?

Kids! we do the darnest things

But you gotta love us.
You gotta love me, right?

You know what! you wanna something so bad
that you bent the rules to get it.

And anytime you do that it's
gonna bite you on the butt.

You're right.
You're absolutely right.

Two hours and 23 minutes in the
slammer can really change a person.

I learn my lesson.

So any other, you know, punishment
would be completely pointless.

I wouldn't necessarily go that far with it.

Daddy, please we not go down this road

This is where the party and the last thing
I want is to be seen being driven by my dad.

Oh no

Oh yes

come on Daddy.

You may as well pull out the blow
horn and annouce my arrival.

You know me to well darling.

Oh, come on!

Hi everybody, It's Miley stewart's
Daddy dropping her off at the party

Because she didn't get a license!
ha ha ha

How's that for punishment?

It is so not fair

Who did the picture on two

Everyone know you do it on three,
one two three!

It's really not that bad.

Are you kidding?
It looks like a horse stepped on her face

Oliver, that's ridiculous.

It's more like she ran into a plain glass door!
ha..ha