[Jenny]
♪ 5:00, get a call
to go blading ♪
♪ at the skate park
down by the mall, ♪
♪ but my mom says ♪
♪ I gotta prevent
hostile aliens ♪
♪ from annihilating us all. ♪
Hyah!
♪ With the strength
of a million and 70 men, ♪
♪ I guess I really
shouldn't complain. ♪
♪ Still, I wish I could
go for a walk ♪
♪ without rusting
in the rain. ♪
♪ It's enough
to fry my brain. ♪
♪ So welcome to my life
as a teenage robot, ♪
♪ the story of my life
as a teenage robot. ♪
♪ My teenage robot life. ♪ ♪
[dramatic action music]
♪ ♪
[bubbling]
Ah, fresh healing lava.
These Earth volcanoes
just melt away the stress
of Mercury's
hustle and bustle.
I'm lucky
I b*at the seasonal rush.
After a nice, long soak,
I'll stroll down to the village
and sample some
of the local human brains
I've heard so much about.
[whistle blows]
What the glork?
[whistling continues]
All right, I--
All right,
everybody out of the pool.
It's time
to clean up the scum.
Ahghh!
No one ruins my vacation!
splurp!
Everybody
out of the pool, Brad?
I was just tryin' to help.
Here, you take
the net-o-matic
and bag the crater critter
on my signal.
Net duty again?
How lame.
ploop!
[rocket roaring]
Jenny, Jenny, Jenny, Jenny!
Huh?
thump!
Jenny,
what are you doing?
You can't b*at 'em
with brute strength.
Now, if it were me out there--
I know it's not--
but if it were--
Brad,
I know what I'm doing.
[Crater Critter]
Hi-ya!
[Brad]
Jenny!
What?
Watch out!
bong!
Good thing I always carry
a full-sized spare.
Spare this,
you little party pooper.
Oh, my gosh.
Jenny's done for
unless I do something.
I'll save you, Jenny.
Brad, I thought
I told you to stay put.
[sizzling]
[Brad yelling]
Hot, hot, hot,
hot, hot, hot.
[laughs]
You just had to get in the way,
didn't you, Brad?
Look, Jenny,
I've been by your side in, like,
a million battles
by now.
I want to do more
than sit on the sidelines
with some lame net.
Yeah, well, this "lame net"
has us trapped
and at the mercy
of a hungry monster.
And it's not my
juicy human brain
he's gonna feast on.
I don't know.
After seeing him
in action,
I'm not sure
he'll be much of a meal.
Good point.
All right,
all right!
My brain is as rich and juicy
as anyone else's.
Well, then,
let's cr*ck your skull open
and have a look-see.
[humming sound]
[Brad]
The Skyway Patrol.
Oh, swell.
Just when I thought things
couldn't get any worse.
That's a 7067 Skyhawk.
If you guzzle a soda,
that ship can circle the Earth
before you
have time to belch.
[together]
Hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup,
hup, hup, hup, hup, hup!
By authority of the warrant
issued by high command
on Skydeck Q4J-niner,
I hereby place you under arrest
for unauthorized
lava bathing
with intent to feast
on human brains.
Take him away,
boys.
[together]
Hup, hup, hup,
hup, hup.
And as for you, XJ-9,
Skyway Patrol is
the authorized authority
for dealing with
illegal alien activity.
We will not tolerate
the interference
of robotic rookies.
I coulda
handled the critter myself.
Hey, are you guys
taking new recruits?
What?
The patrol
is always looking
for energetic
young go-getters, my lad.
Just sign
this enlistment form,
and we'll jet you
right off to the academy.
Brad,
you can't be serious.
I'm entirely serious,
rookie.
I'm done
sitting on the sidelines.
It's time
I was part of a team
that appreciates
my enthusiasm.
[rockets f*ring]
thunk!
Hey, why's the hot springs
all frozen?
You.
Now, see here.
I don't want
to get rough with you,
so if you just leave.
Pile on!
[punching sounds]
[Brad]
Wow, the Skyway Patrol
sky station.
Talk about being
where the action is.
[plasma g*ns f*ring]
[crashing]
[jet engines roaring]
[vacuuming sound]
[buzzing]
plunk!
[humming]
[heart b*ating]
[clattering sounds]
slap!
[whirring, hissing,
and plunking]
Watch out, evildoers.
Action Brad is on patrol.
[dramatic music]
♪ ♪
Halt!
Just where do you think
you're goin', recruit?
Cadet, third class,
Bradley Carbuckle
reporting for duty,
sir!
Son, what basic equipment
is every cadet naked without?
A blaster?
Wrong!
His paperwork.
Now, don't come back
till you've got
your proper duty forms!
Hup, hup, hup!
Hup, hup, hup, hup, hup, hup,
hup, hup, hup, hup, hup.
Hup, hup, hup, hup,
hup, hup, hup, hup.
Hup, hup,
hup, hup, hup.
Cadet Carbuckle reporting
to receive
duty order forms, sir.
Certainly, Cadet.
Just fill
these out in triplicate
and distribute them
to the appropriate offices.
[thinking]
Mother's maiden name,
date of birth,
date of
potty training completion,
phone number,
passport number,
enlistment--
flu sh*t,
date of last oil change,
date for the prom,
doctor's mother's
maiden name.
State of birth,
state of despair.
Dental records,
number of fillings.
Dentist's mother's
maiden name.
Hup, hup, hup.
Egads!
You're missin'
your JR-345!
Get your tail back to dispatch,
double time.
Move it:
hup, hup, hup.
Hup, hup, hup, hup.
I'm missing my JR-345.
What do I do?
Calm down, son.
We have a perfect system
of flawless filing.
Ensign, come here.
[in a high-pitched voice]
Hup, hup, hup.
Sir, yes, sir.
Find this recruit's
JR-345.
Sir, yes, sir.
Hup!
Hup!
Hup! Hup!
Hup! Hup! Hup!
Not there, sir.
Sorry, sir.
Not there?
Not there?
Not there?
[alarm sounds]
[screaming and paper rustling]
Um, is this it, sir?
[together]
Pftew.
thump!
There you go,
my boy, ready for action...
after you fill out these
Red Alert Incident Forms
and deliver them
to the incident department
in quadruplicate.
[wheezing]
Huuuup, huup, uh.
Now, this is
a ready recruit.
Welcome to the patrol,
cadet.
Cadet Carbuckle
reporting for duty.
Why are you so late,
cadet?
Ah, lateness due to red alert
incident form.
Well done, cadet.
Report to your post.
[breathing heavily]
Uh!
Oh!
[alarm buzzing]
Multiple alien sightings
at Volcano Island, Captain.
All right, crew,
prepare for take-off.
Oh, boy,
this is perfect.
Jenny'll blow a gasket
when we swoop in
and b*at her
at her own game.
[jet engines f*ring]
All right,
you guys, I'll give you
just one more chance
to leave peacefully.
Why...won't you...
stay...down?
I guess you could say...
that when it comes to...
fighting earthlings...
we rock.
Aw, nuts.
Since you ruined
our favorite hot spot,
it only seems fair
that we get to eat your brain.
Uh, you wouldn't
like my brain.
It's all circuit-y
and metallic.
Oh, good,
we haven't been getting
our recommended
daily allowance of iron.
Huh?
It's Skyway Patrol.
Multiple targets sighted,
Captain.
Navigator,
maintain holding pattern.
What?
We're still awaiting
att*ck forms from high command.
But don't worry.
They're on their way.
[gasping]
Captain, it appears
that the crater critters
are about to eat
the rogue robot's brain.
Maintain holding pattern,
only more so.
Captain, please,
in desperate times,
immediate, rash action
is the only answer,
for if we fail to act,
we fail to uphold the ideals
of Skyway Patrol itself:
liberty, equality, and--
and--whatever
the third one is.
By thunder,
you're right.
[shattering]
Prepare paperwork
to request permission
to take rash
and immediate action.
Huh?
thunk! thunk!
Now, fill out
those rush forms in triplicate,
and attach them
to a homing pigeon.
They ain't
doin' nothing.
Well, then,
where were we?
The ever-reliable
Skyway Patrol.
Oh, my gosh,
Jenny's really in trouble.
Wait a minute.
The rogue robot's
in trouble.
Sir, while we await orders,
the rogue robot, XJ-9,
continues to step over
our bounds of authority.
Hmm, you're right.
That automaton has made
fools of us long enough.
Shall I beam her aboard
and take her into custody?
Yes!
beep!
[twinkling]
Right after you fill out
the beaming aboard requests
in quintuplicate.
[metal creaking]
Ah!
[screaming]
What's he
still doing here?
We only had orders
to arrest the beast.
We're still awaiting
deportation forms.
That does it.
[engines whining]
Please, no,
this is my last spare head.
[buzzing]
Yes,
better late than never.
[warbling]
Welcome aboard, Jen.
You remember
our little friend.
Oh, goodie,
a couple of nice young brains.
Brad, these creatures
can't be destroyed,
and I'm too damaged
to even come close.
Say, I think it's time
we put all this paperwork
to good use.
Do you know how to play
rock, paper, scissors?
[together]
One, two, three.
[humming]
Paper covers rock.
Cadet Carbuckle,
your quick thinking
defeated
the crater critter,
but it
was totally unauthorized.
And you, we've had
enough of your lone wolf,
loose cannon tactics.
I am not
a loose cannon.
Anyway,
I don't work alone.
I have
a team of my own.
Be that as it may,
we can't let this
unauthorized activity
continue.
You're both under arrest.
Hey, that's fine.
But you'll need
an arrest warrant.
But before
you can get a warrant,
you have to fill out
a warrant request form.
And before
you get a warrant request form,
you have to fill out
a request acquisition
requisite document
in triplicate.
thump!
[crashing]
If you follow proper procedure,
you should be finished
in 10 or 20 years.
[laughter]
You two hooligans
won't get away with this.
I'm going to put
three rush stamps on this.
Just wait till I've got
the proper paperwork!
[creepy music]
♪ ♪
[beeping]
Ugh,
fourth-dimensional calculus
is impossible
with this piece of junk.
[whining beeping]
Sounds like somebody's
calculator needs an upgrade.
[triumphant beeping]
[Brad]
Upgrade, schmupgrade.
beep! beep! beep! beep!
[blades whirring]
[clanging]
Brad, what are you doing?
You can't just throw away
a perfectly functioning machine.
What are you talking about?
Something gets old,
you throw it away
and get a new one.
It's called
"planned obsolesce."
Every electronic mind
has something to offer.
Oh, come on, Jenny,
not every machine
can be upgraded.
There are limits
to what some machines can do.
[makes gagging sound]
[thunder cracks]
[Wakeman over TV]
Weather alert,
XJ-9.
A strange storm cloud
has blanketed
the entire
Eastern seaboard.
But this is
no ordinary storm.
It comes from
outer space.
[thunder cracks]
Better news for those out West,
where sunny skies should
continue through the weekend.
[laughs]
[thunder cracks and rolls]
[warbling crackle]
[electric lines powering down]
Bright lights, big city,
my kind of town.
[electric crackling]
[sucking from straw sounds]
Ah!
This planet's abundant energy
will provide Gigawatt
with a feast fit
for a king.
[Jenny]
All right,
lightning bug,
it's time for you
to power down.
Ah, a small
native power source.
What can Gigawatt
do for you, my dear?
Cough up the energy
you've stolen,
or get ready for a
high-voltage Heimlich maneuver.
[buzzing and humming]
Oh!
Mmm, ionized plasma beams,
my favorite.
[energy crackling]
thump!
A delicious little voltage.
[laughs maniacally]
[Wakeman]
XJ-9, can you hear me?
What happened?
After I lost your signal,
I went to recover you,
only to find you completely
drained by Gigawatt,
an interstellar
energy vampire.
I have no doubt
he plans to devour
all of Earth's energy.
We're already on our
emergency backup system.
[sputtering and chugging]
Don't worry, Mom,
I'll pull the plug on Gigawa--
No, no, no,
XJ-9.
Your metallic structure
makes you vulnerable
to Gigawatt's
electrical att*cks.
There are limits
to what you can do.
Oh, no,
you don't.
You're not touching
my replace button.
What?
I know
I can defeat Gigawatt,
and if you won't help me,
I'll upgrade myself.
plunk!
I'll just download something
off the internet.
XJ-9, no,
you'll go blind.
Uhck, if you're
so determined to get an upgrade,
you'd better
let me do it correctly.
And quickly.
[calliope music]
Put the lollipop down,
monster.
Ah, my midnight snack
has arrived.
[electricity crackling]
What this?
I'm rubber,
and you're glue.
Can't shock me,
but I'm gonna stick to you.
[ricocheting
and bouncing sounds]
Ooh, you do look perky
in basic black.
[warbling hum]
clang!
But your
magnetic personality
is your
most attractive quality.
[laughs]
[Jenny]
This rubber shell upgrade
didn't go deep enough.
For my next upgrade,
I need to be less magnetic.
Another upgrade?
But, XJ-9,
we don't have enough energy
to power the lab.
Well, if we can't
make anything new,
we'll have to use
what we already have.
What we already--
you're not thinking.
Whoooa!
thunk!
XJ-9, you're
not thinking what I'm afraid
I'm thinking that
you're thinking about thinking.
That's right,
your new stealth
satellite dish.
With those plastic components,
I can't be magnetized.
But it gets
[rumbling]
sproing!
[screeching]
thump!
[metal screeching]
Ah, railroad linguini,
although I do prefer
a more al dente rail.
[slurping]
[airplane engine buzzing]
[lasers f*ring]
[energy crackling]
[rockets f*ring]
Ow!
[fly buzzing sound]
[clanging]
[magnetic warbling]
[Jenny]
We need to think
outside of the box
for this next upgrade.
Any bright ideas, Mom?
[panting]
Ooh!
Ideas are beside the point,
XJ-9.
There's no more power
for the lab, for upgrades,
for anything.
Gigawatt has left us nothing
but the roof over our heads.
Well, then, maybe it's time
to raise the roof.
[gasps]
thunk!
[owl hooting]
[screaming]
Mmm, s'mores.
[clanging footsteps]
[crashing]
What kind
of abomination is this?
[Jenny]
Don't you recognize me?
My latest makeover
is a bit radical,
but I'm still
the same girl on the inside.
Okay, so my body isn't
as magnetically attractive.
That doesn't mean
we can't still play together.
[rumbling and clanging]
[Jenny screams]
Ooh, ooh, ah, ooh.
Aaah.
Whoa!
[crashing]
[Gigawatt]
Listen closely,
material girl.
The future belongs
to life forms of pure energy.
No amount of costume changes
can change the fact
that evolution
has passed you by.
[electricity crackling]
My goodness, XJ-9.
What happened?
[in a distant voice]
Gigawatt happened again.
I used everything we had,
and I still couldn't b*at
Gigawatt.
Maybe I can't be upgraded.
I'm--I'm obsolete.
[crying]
Hi,
Dr. Wakeman.
Watering the lawn?
Where's Jenny?
Hi, Tuck.
Wha!
It's another Wakeman
monstrosity.
The garbage-eating brain!
Oh, hey, Jenny,
what are you doing in the trash?
This is where
obsolete robots belong.
Obsolete?
Yeah,
like an old calculator.
A calculator,
I don't use these anymore.
Relying on upgrades
is a crutch.
I like to flex
the old brain muscle.
That's why I use
an abacus.
You trust your brain
more than a computer?
Sure,
the brain is
the most powerful
computer there is.
Indeed,
XJ-9.
Nothing can replace
your creative brain.
Yeah, your brain
is way powerful,
powerfully grotesque.
Yeah,
fancy upgrades
and advanced weaponry
aren't important.
My mind is the w*apon
that matters most.
My brain power,
I'll never be obsolete.
I'll never--
Whop-see.
Whoops,
butter fingers.
I'm sorry.
You were
saying?
Forget it.
I've got an idea.
[barking]
ploink!
[crunching]
[crying]
Ah, the children,
so generous.
But now, the city is dark.
Fortunately,
I see a brighter future
on the horizon.
What's this?
Again you appear
as the rubber girl?
Have your past defeats
taught you nothing?
[electric warbling]
What sorcery is this?
[plasma beams f*ring]
[buzzing]
thunk!
Ghosts, ghosts of the past
haunt Gigawatt.
[Jenny]
Wrong, fuse face.
This ain't
no blast from the past
but a face
full of the future.
[electricity shorting]
Ahhh!
[coughing]
Well, well, looks like
this pure energy life form
isn't so pure.
What power
of the universe allows you
to control
four bodies at once?
The power
of a creative mind.
It's the brain
that makes the robot,
not the number of upgrades
or tightness of her bolts.
plunk!
clunk!
ploing!
[in tinny voice]
Although a good head bolt
does come in handy.
02x02 - Last Action Zero/Mind Over Matter
Watch/Buy Amazon Merchandise
Set in the fictional town of Tremorton and focuses on making lighthearted fun of typical teenage issues and conventions of works relating to teenagers and superheroes.
Set in the fictional town of Tremorton and focuses on making lighthearted fun of typical teenage issues and conventions of works relating to teenagers and superheroes.