01x15 - Say Cheese and Die

[bunniefuu]

[ Wind Whistling ]

[ Dog Barking ]

[ Man ]
Goosebumps.

Viewer beware.

You're in for a scare.

[ Chuckles ]

[ Horns Honking ]

- There he is.
- Spidey!

With those long legs,
he does look like a spider.

[ Chuckles ]

And just as creepy.

- [ Girl ] I hear he sleeps in there.
- [ Boy ♪2 ] I heard that too.

- [ Boy ♪1 ] I heard he eats rats.
- [ Girl ] It's cats.

I heard it was bats.

- Ew, tasty.
- [ All Chuckle ]

There he goes.

[ Boy ♪1 ]
Come on, you guys.

Let's check this place out
before they finally tear it down.

What if Spidey comes back?

- [ Gasps ] There he is!
- Very funny.

- You jumped.
- I did not.

- Yeah, you did.
- Bird, be quiet.

- Scaredy-cat.
- I'm not scared.

Ah, cool, TV.

Why would somebody live like this?

What is it?

- Uh, it looks like a toaster.
- [ Chuckles ]

- Hey, Bird!
- Yeah, what?

- I think this thing's a camera.
- Cool camera!

Nice!
Okay, take my picture.

- Okay, um--
- Say "Cheese."

- [ Camera Warbling ]
- Cheddar.

I hope you captured
my incredible juggling skills.

- Aah!
- Bird!

- Are you okay?
- I think so.

You guys,
let's just get out of here, okay?

Yeah.

[ Bird ]
For sure.

[ Gasps ]

[ Breathing Heavily ]

What are you doing here?

[ Shrieks ]

- Is he coming?
- I don't see him.

- That was close.
- That was too close.

I'm never ever doing anything
like that again.

- Me neither.
- Greg, you took the camera!

- I didn't even notice I had it.
- [ Girl ] We gotta put it back.

[ Bird ] Well, ain't no way
we're goin' back now.

I don't get it.

What?
It's a great action sh*t.

Yeah, but...
I took the picture before you fell.

No, well, maybe
you only thought you did.

No. I know I did.

Come on. Let's go.

I could've sworn--

Hey, you guys, wait up.

Hey, Troll.

- Don't call me that.
- Oh, okay.

What do you think of Dad's new ride?

- I think it's excellent.
- What's that?

Oh, just a camera.
Somethin' Shari gave me.

- Take my picture. Come on.
- Okay.

[ Camera Warbling ]

Let's see it.
Come on. Let me see it.

Oh, it's a--
It's a new process.

It doesn't develop right away.

Monsieur Troll,
last call for dinner.

Hey, is that picture ready yet?

It didn't turn out. Look,
don't you know how to knock?

Mmm, nuh-uh. I haven't taken
that class yet. [ Chuckles ]

I don't get it.

[ Clinking ]

- It's good chicken, Mom.
- It's not chicken, Terry. It's veal!

It's good veal.

Mmm, what's wrong with you?

Oh, not hungry.

So, what's everybody
think of the new car?

- Hmm?
- [ Chuckles ]

I think you should take it back.

Uh, just because, um,

think how bad you would feel
if you got a scratch on it.

And besides, it's too shiny.
It hurts my eyes.

He's been acting really weird
ever since he came home.

- Have you been acting weird?
- No weirder than usual. [ Scoffs ]

I thought you'd be
thrilled about the car.

He will be, after he takes a spin in it.
Come on, everybody. Let's go.

- We'll clean up later.
- Shotgun!

Whoa.
Listen to that baby hum.

I always wanted a car
with a little muscle.

Real smooth ride, Dad.

Dad, don't you think
you should slow down?

- We're only going 35, Greg.
- Yeah, put the pedal to the metal.

- But watch the speed limit.
- What speed limit?

[ Dad ]
Just kiddin'. [ Chuckles ]

[ Sighs ] I think there's something
I should show you.

What is it, honey?

- Dad, watch out!
- [ Mom Screams ]

- [ Truck Horn Honks ]
- [ Tires Screech ]

That jerk.
He could've k*lled us.

That was close.

Is everyone okay?

Greg? Greg?

Okay, everybody.

- Say "Cheese."
[ All ] Cheese!

[ Camera Warbles ]

[ Gasps ]

[ Breathing Heavily ]

[ Sighs ]

[ Greg ]
I'm not kidding, Bird.

Took a picture of our new car.

When I looked at the photograph,
it was all smashed up.

[ Scoffs ]
I'm not buying it.

I'm serious. I think this thing
predicts the future or something.

[ Scoffs ] If you're serious,
then I'll make a prediction.

Tomorrow, men in white coats
are gonna come and take you away.

- I swear.
- Well, let's see it.

The picture?
It flew out the car window.

How convenient. And how's the car?
Did it get wrecked?

[ Sighs ] No, but--
I mean, look at this thing.

I mean, there's nowhere to put
the film, or no way to even open it.

Well, give it to me.

- Smile.
- Man, cut it out.

Reality check.
This is a camera, not a w*apon.

Aw, man, look.
Joey Ferris and Mickey Knox.

[ Chuckles ]
Look!

- They found my camera.
- Thanks.

Come on, Joey. Give it back.
It's not mine.

That's 'cause it's mine.

I don't think so.
Finders keepers, pal.

- Well, take my picture then. Come on.
- I wouldn't. Seriously--

Okay. Smile.

- Don't do it!
- What?

Well, because your face
is gonna break the camera.

You want that stupid smile
to be permanent, Fish?

- It's Bird.
- Run!

Get them!

[ Grunts ]

[ Chuckles ] Come on.

Come on!

- You could've used the gate.
- Yeah, well, uh, this way was faster.

Well, I'm-- I'm glad
you brought the camera,

'cause now you can take my picture.

Oh, Shar,
I don't think that's a good idea.

Come on. How's this?

Listen, Shari. There's something
really freaky about this thing.

Will you just take the picture?

Okay. [ Sighs ]

[ Camera Warbling ]

Was that so hard?
Lemme see.

Greg, you totally missed me.

No, I didn't.
I aimed it right at you.

See? There's the tree
you were leaning against.

Then what am I?
Invisible?

- Or a vampire.
- Come on, Greg. Let's try again.

- Shari--
- Greg!

[ Sighs ]

Greg, it's Dad.
There's been an accident.

What do you mean,
"an accident"?

The car, man. It's totaled.

[ Sighs ]

Well, I guess I'm pretty lucky.

- You don't look so lucky to me.
- Oh.

I'll be up and around in no time.

You'll take it easy.
That's what you'll do.

The car's a complete wreck.

I'm just glad
you boys didn't see it.

[ Knocking ]

- Greg Banks?
- Yeah.

Do you know Shari Walker?

Shari? Uh, yeah,
she's one of my best friends.

- When was the last time you saw her?
- Uh, earlier today at her house.

- Do you know where she is now?
- At her house, I guess.

No, she's not.
She's missing. Disappeared.

- I knew it.
- What do you mean, you knew it?

Uh, well, I mean--
[ Chuckles ]

I mean that I knew something
must have happened to her.

- Oh, how'd you know that?
- Well, um, because you guys are here.

You telling us the truth?

Honestly, the last time
I saw her was at her house.

I took a picture of her.

Oh, I'd like to see that.
It might be helpful.

- Um, okay. Well, uh, actually--
- Is that the picture you took?

- Um, yeah, it is. But I--
- Can I see it, please?

- Okay, but first, you gotta know that--
- Just give her the picture.

[ Sighs ]

- What is this? Some kind of joke?
- No.

This is a picture of a tree.

I, uh, just must be
a real bad photographer.

Listen, kid.

You better not be lying to us.
'Cause if you are, we'll find out.

[ Sighs ]

[ Police Radio Chatter ]

[ Groans ]

The camera knew, Bird. It knew
that Shari was gonna disappear.

- Oh, man.
- No, no, look. Don't you get it?

I-it predicts the future,
and it makes it bad.

You gotta believe me.

- Why didn't you tell the police?
- They'd think I was nuts.

A-and now Shari's disappeared.

It's all my fault.

It's these stupid pictures.

This stupid camera.

This is too weird.
Look.

Not a scratch.

We gotta take it back.

Toss it. Throw it away.

Man, then what if someone finds it
and takes a picture with it?

Maybe it belongs to Spidey, and he
kidnapped Shari because we took it.

Well, that's more of a reason
to take it back.

See? Don't you see?
We have to.

We did not take the camera.
You did.

I'm not goin' back to that place.
No way.

You're gonna put all this on me.

Well, I got a lot of stuff
to do for my dad.

A whole bunch of stuff.

Take it easy, Greg.
I'm sorry. I'll see you later.

[ Sighs ]

- Greg!
- [ Gasps ]

Shari!

- Are you okay?
- Yeah. Well, I guess so.

- Where were you?
- I don't know.

You don't know?

- Didn't Spidey kidnap you?
- No.

It's so unreal. All of a sudden,
I was back in my backyard.

[ Scoffs ]
I don't even know where I was.

My parents are really upset.
They think I did it on purpose.

When? I mean,
when did you come back?

I don't know.
A few hours ago.

That's about when
I tore up your photograph.

It's the camera.
It made you disappear.

I'm gonna bring it back.

Yeah, I know. Bird told me.

I couldn't let you do it by yourself.

- Thanks. Come on.
- [ Cat Yowls ]

Let's get this over with.

[ Greg ] Okay.
I don't see Spidey. Come on.

- [ Clattering ]
- What was that?

I don't know. Come on.
Let's just do this and get out.

Okay.

[ Both Scream ]

Primitive tribes fear the camera.

They believe that if it takes their
picture, it will steal their soul.

This camera is far worse,
far worse, far worse.

We were just gonna bring it back.

I figured you might,

once you discovered
the kind of pictures it takes.

[ Gasps ]

Give it to me.

A camera that predicts the future.
[ Chuckles ]

It should have made me my fortune.

- You invented it?
- What?

Do you think I've always been a
wretched creature slinking about at night?

Yes! Yes.

Yes. [ Sighs ]

I soon discovered it not only predicted
the future, it made it happen.

And it was always disastrous.

It can't be destroyed. That's why
I've kept it hidden all these years.

Yeah, well, uh, it's back now, so--
Sorry we caused you so much trouble.

Afraid that won't be possible.

You got your camera back.
What else do you want?

You know too much.
I can't let you leave.

I've worked too long and hard
to keep this camera a secret.

You don't have to worry.
Your secret's safe with us.

- We won't tell anyone.
- I can't risk that.

You can't keep us here forever.

I'm sorry.
I have no choice.

- [ Grunting ]
- No!

[ Camera Warbling ]

No!

- Where'd he go?
- I-I don't know.

But let's get out of here.

[ Footsteps Departing ]

[ Spidey's Voice ]
Release me!

Release me!

Someone! Anyone!

Release me!

[ Dog Barking ]

[ Chuckles ]
Here it is.

[ Chuckles ] Those jerks actually
thought they could hide it from us.

- [ Chuckles ]
- Ah, here. Take my picture.

All right.

Say "Cheese."

[ Camera Warbles ]

Okay. Let's see.

[ Chuckles ]

[ Spidey Laughing ]