WOMAN: Are you ready?
♪ Ooh ♪
♪ I know you see me
standing here ♪
♪ Do I look good,
my dear? ♪
♪ Do I look good today? ♪
♪ Today, today ♪
♪ Ooh ooh ooh ♪
♪ I'm just another
kind of girl ♪
♪ And you want
to see my world ♪
♪ So come and run away ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
♪ If you wanna play ♪
♪ Come and play today ♪
♪ Let's just get away, yeah ♪
♪ I will make you see ♪
♪ All of the things ♪
♪ That you can be ♪
♪ Believe in yourself ♪
♪ Come follow me ♪
♪ Yeah, yeah ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ ♪
- Well, is it ready?
- Patience, Dean Rivers.
I just have to adjust
the auditory flux modulator.
- Of...course.
[Beeping]
- There.
Your automated voice activation
system is ready to rock.
- Great! What do I do?
- Say "lights."
- Lights.
- Now say it again.
- Lights!
[chuckling] Very cool.
- Yep. Hey, want some coffee?
- Sure.
- Then say it.
- Coffee.
[coffee maker beeps]
Okay, I love this.
- Who wouldn't?
Now close the door.
- All right.
- Nope.
Don't do it.
Just say it.
- Door.
Excellent.
- Oh, and if your office is
ever invaded by an intruder,
just yell "dogs."
- Dogs?
- Shh!
Only if you're in danger.
- [whispering] Right.
- Well, I'd better get
to class.
- Okay.
Well, thanks for getting me
all hooked up.
- I'll e-mail you my bill.
Ciao.
BEVERLY:
Dean Rivers?
Your wife is here
to see you.
- My wife?
Uh...
tell her I'm not here.
[beeping]
BEVERLY: Mrs. Rivers!
He's not in there!
MRS. RIVERS:
Don't give me that!
Carl!
Carl, what kind of grown man
spends $2,000 on video games!
Carl!
Carl!
- Dogs.
[dogs snarling and barking]
MRS. RIVERS: Huh?
Aah!
[barking]
- Thank you, Quinn.
- Ha ha!
All righty, boys.
Check it out.
Back to the basket,
eyes closed,
reverse hook off the backboard,
and in.
- Oh, come on.
- Relax.
That sh*t's impossible.
- Oh, is it?
Oh ho ho!
Ha ha ha!
Did someone say impossible?
- Yeah, keep showin' off
for Vanessa.
- Oh, is that Vanessa
over there?
- Dude, why don't you just ask
her out already?
- Ah, she's too cute.
I'll throw up.
- Aw, girls love that.
- Yeah, just puke on her,
and you're in like flynn.
- Can we just get back to
the game?
You're up, dog.
- Score?
- Uh, I got "H."
You have H-O,
and Chase has H-O-R.
- Yes, I'm losing.
We're all clear on that.
- Oh! And he gets the "S."
[laughs]
- No, I reject the "S."
- You missed.
You can't reject the "S."
- Yes, I can.
I hate "S."
I'm starting a petition to
remove "S" from the alphabet.
- Dude, you can't live
without "S"s.
- I could live
the rest of my life
without ever using a word
that has an "S" in it.
- Bet I could go longer
than you.
- Uh, shall we make
this a 3-way bet?
- Bring it.
- Okay, the first one of us
to say a word with the letter
"S" in it, has to...
run through campus wearing
nothing but a bikini top
and a hula skirt.
- And with a flashing light
on his head.
- It's a bet.
- All right.
- I'm in.
- Okay.
"S"s are off-limits
starting now.
- Okay.
Well, do you people
want to continue
playing...
the game we were
recently playing?
- Yeah.
Indeed, I would like to
continue playing that game.
- Well, I am hungry,
and I would like
to go get a tuna f--
food item.
Food item to eat.
- Hey.
Here...come...
the girl you like.
- Right.
Girl very pretty.
- Correct.
- Hi, Michael.
- Hey, Vane...
Ha ha ha!
Hey, you!
Ha ha!
- See? I told you.
One regular bagel,
- How many carbs?
- No one counts carbs anymore.
- Yeah. When did people stop
counting carbs?
- When they figured out
it was stupid?
- I know.
I'm gonna sign on right now.
Get off the computer.
I need it.
- Uh, why can't you use
the computer in your room?
- The wireless is down.
Now hush!
There's an illness in my family.
Otis!
Otis, can you hear me?
Look into the camera!
Otis?
[Otis bleats]
- Is that a llama?
- Otis is not a llama!
He's an alpaca.
[Otis bleating]
- Sorry.
- I got him for Christmas
when I was 9,
and he's my very best friend
in the world.
- So what's wrong with him?
- We're not sure.
He's been sick for 3 weeks.
The veterinarian's there right
now talking with my parents.
MRS. PENSKY: Hi, Quinny!
Can you see me
on the computer?
Look.
I got my eyebrows waxed!
- That's great, Mom.
Dad, is the vet there?
- Yes! She's right here!
Dr. Lang!
[bleating]
- Hello, Quinn.
I'm Dr. Lang.
- So what's wrong with Otis?
Why has he been crying
and not eating?
- Well, I can't be sure,
but my best guess is that
Otis is, well, depressed.
- A depressed llama?
- Alpaca! Now hush!
Why would Otis be depressed?
Mom, have you been reading him
your romance novels again?
- No, baby!
- I think he's depressed
because he misses you.
- Oh, I'm a terrible,
terrible person!
Oh, Otis, I never should
have left you to come to PCA.
- It's okay.
People get over depression.
My uncle Ronnie was
depressed for years.
- How'd he get better?
- He didn't.
He robbed a convenience store,
then got arrested.
- Why would you tell
that story?
- Quinn, is there any way you
could come home for a few days?
I think Otis would be fine
if he could
just spend a couple of
days with you.
[Otis bleats]
- You can't go home.
It's the middle of the semester.
- Don't worry, baby.
We'll cheer up your ostrich!
- Mom, he's an alpaca!
- Love you, too, sweetie!
- Aw, Quinn, now don't you go
get all depressed.
- I'm not depressed.
[playing mournful tune
on trombone]
- She is so depressed.
- Yeah. Listen to that.
ZOEY: I've never seen Quinn
like this.
We should do something for her.
Hey, let's throw her,
like, a really cool party.
- Her birthday
was 3 months ago.
- Not a birthday party.
- What? Do you mean like
an alpaca party?
- Yeah, with like a whole
alpaca theme.
- All right,
when should we do it?
[Quinn playing louder]
- As soon as possible.
BOTH: Mm-hmm!
- "The Boston Tea Party."
On the evening of
December the 16th, 1774,
thousands of Bostonians packed
into the Old South Meeting House
to hear Samuel Adams speak.
- You two people are gonna lo--
- Adams denounced
the governor...
- Not win the bet.
- No, you will...
not win,
for I can go longer without...
invoking the letter...
after "R."
- Wrong.
I will win the bet,
for one of you will...
talk the bad letter
before me do.
Before me.
No need for the "do."
MR. FLEMMING:
Hey, Chase, Michael, Logan,
you guys have been whispering
this whole class.
- I, uh...I-I apologize.
- Ha!
- "Z."
- Oh.
- Guys, check out
the alpaca cake.
- [gasps]
- Whoa! It's perfect.
- Yeah!
- Not till Quinn sees it.
- Hey, where's
the alpaca costume?
- Oh, yeah, where is it?
Nicole: [laughs]
Um...Mark, come over here.
- Um, that's an aardvark.
- Well, you try finding
an alpaca costume!
They don't exist.
- [breathing heavily]
- Ew!
Why are you all sweaty?
- It's a million degrees
inside this thing.
Do I have to wear the head?
ALL: Yes!
- Hey, guys!
Quinn's coming!
- Oh, hurry! Put it on!
- Don't talk.
Hit the music.
WOMAN: ♪ Yeah, you think
that I don't mind... ♪
ALL: Surprise!
Whoo!
- What's all this?
- It's an alpaca party.
[blowing noisemaker]
MARK: Moo!
- An alpaca party? Why?
- To cheer you up.
- 'Cause we know how much
you miss Otis.
- Oh, you guys are so sweet.
- Well, it gets better.
Turn it on.
- Otis!
Hi, Otis.
- Look, Quinn!
We're on the interweb again!
- Happy alpaca party, baby!
- Thanks, Dad.
Oh, Otis, you look so cute
with your party hat.
[Otis bleating]
He still sounds depressed.
- Come on, Quinn.
Let's cut the cake!
- Yeah, cake!
Yeah!
- Well, ok, but first
I gotta go get my camera
to take pictures of all this.
- Okay, but hurry
'cause, you know...cake.
- I'll hurry.
I promise.
- Think we made her happy?
- I think so.
MARK: Can I take
my head off now?
ALL: No!
- Oh!
- Whoo...
WOMAN: ♪ Confession... ♪
[song changes]
MAN: ♪ Near the sun,
shinin' down ♪
♪ I have learned the... ♪
- [yawning]
Where is she?
- How long can it take to get
a camera?
- I better go check on her.
[Mark panting]
- Ok, it's like 120 degrees
in this thing.
I can't keep this head on!
Okay.
- Where's Quinn?
- She ran away.
- Huh?
- Okay, how do we know Quinn
really ran away?
- Yeah, what does her note say
exactly?
- "I'm running away,"
which to me sounds like
she's running away.
- Did she say why?
- Yeah.
She says she has to go home
and be with Otis
"in his time of need."
- Aw!
A girl and her beast.
MARK: So hot.
Feeling dizzy.
- I guess our alpaca party just
made her miss Otis even more.
- Hey, if she leaves the PCA
campus without permission,
can't she get suspended?
- Or worse.
- We gotta stop her.
- And fast, 'cause it's gonna
be dark soon.
- Okay, but we need to split up
so we can cover
more of the campus faster.
- Right.
- [gasp]
- Quinn?
Quinn!
Quinn?
Quinn!
Uh, you go this way;
we'll go that way!
Come on. Let's go!
Quinn!
- Quinn!
Quinn!
Quinn!
- Don't try to stop me!
- You can't leave PCA!
- Otis needs me!
[dramatic music]
♪ ♪
Leave me alone!
- No!
- What do you want?
- I'm not letting you leave
PCA!
You'll get suspended!
- But there's a 4-foot-tall
furry bundle of sadness
who needs me!
- So what are you gonna do,
Quinn?
How are you gonna get home, huh?
- I don't know.
Monorail!
- There's no monorail from
California to Seattle.
- Well, there should be!
- Quinn!
- I have to see Otis.
- Ok, look, just...just give me
time to think.
Let me try to fix this.
- How?
- I don't know yet,
but you gotta promise me
you won't leave PCA.
- All right.
- All right?
- All right.
- All right.
- All right.
- Quinn actually tried
to leave PCA?
- To go be with her alpaca?
- Okay, how long
is this gonna go on?
- Yeah, would one of you use
a word with the "S"
in it already so we can have
a normal conversation?
- No.
I am determined
to go longer
than Michael and Logan
without uttering that letter.
- Could this be more annoying?
- No!
- Hey, Michael, there be
the girl you like.
- Michael likes her?
- A lot.
- What's her name?
- Tell her, Michael.
Tell her the name of the girl
you enjoy.
- Nice try,
but I will not do that.
- Her name must have an "S"
in it.
- Give me your cell phone.
- What you gonna do?
- I'm gonna trick Logan into
losing,
so I don't have to listen
to these guys
talk like idiots anymore.
- Hey!
Lola called we
the plural of "idiot."
- I am offended.
- Logan's last name is "Reese,"
with an "S," right?
- Yeah.
- Good.
[dialing]
[cell phone ringing]
- Go for Logan.
LOLA: Hi! This is Jammin' Jamie
from KCool 107,
and you've just won a trip
for 2 to Honolulu!
- No way! For real?
- For real. Now, all you gotta
do is tell us your name.
- Logan.
- And your last name?
- Ree--
- "Ree" what?
Come on, for the love of God,
"Ree" what?
- Re...jected!
Buh-bye.
[exasperated sighs]
- Oh!
- Lights! Lights!
Lights!
[electricity buzzing]
[dogs barking]
Lights!
[dogs barking]
I didn't say "dogs!"
Hey!
Beverly, did you reach Quinn?
[knock on door]
- Dean Rivers, you got a sec?
- No!
Yes, come in.
Keep tryin' to get Quinn here!
Lights!
[dogs barking]
Life is hard.
- Dean Rivers, can I get you
to sign this, please?
- I suppose.
- What's up with the lights?
- Aw, Quinn set up this
voice control system,
and I spilled coffee
on this thing here,
and now it's all kerblooey.
[dogs barking]
Watch.
Coffee.
- Whoa!
My nose.
- Yeah, you should put
some ice on that.
- Thank you, sir.
- I called Quinn five times
and she refuses to come
and fix it.
Says she's too depressed.
- Well, that's actually what
I came to talk to you about.
I think I know how we could
cheer her up.
- How?
- Have you ever heard
of an alpaca?
- Al...paca?
[dogs barking]
- Can you two believe...
half a week without the letter?
- I can go much longer than
that
without...the letter.
- But I will go even longer
without it,
for I will not be
the one
to wear that bikini top
and hula bottom.
- Don't forget the light
on your head.
- Your head.
- No.
For I will not be defeated.
- Nor will I.
- Well, I think that you--
- Okay, Michael,
I've been waiting six weeks
for you to ask me out.
What's up?
- Huh?
- Do you want to go out
with me?
- [stuttering]
- Yes, I do!
- Ha! Yeah!
- Yes!
- Yes ends in "S."
- You lost, dude.
- I don't care.
See, I will be escorting
Miss Vanessa
to Sushi Rox, okay?
Yeah.
And afterwards perhaps we shall
grab some sorbet or soda.
So see ya.
Vanessa.
Ha!
- Sassy.
That's three "S"s.
- Nice.
- Zoey, where are you
taking me?
- Come on. Talk less.
Walk more.
- I don't want to do
anything fun.
I told you I'm too depressed
about Otis to...
[Alpaca bleats]
- No, you did not.
Otis!
Otis!
Oh, how did you guys get him
to PCA?
- Zoey called your mom.
- Who's a little insane, so she
asked to speak to your dad.
- And then we just set it up.
- Oh, my God, this is so great.
Oh, but we have to hide him.
PCA has a strict rule against
pets on campus.
- It's cool.
You're covered.
- Dean Rivers said it's okay
just for one weekend.
- As long as you fix his
voice control system thingy.
- No problem.
Otis, did you hear that?
We get to spend
an entire weekend together.
[bleating]
[Quinn bleats]
- Quinn speaks alpaca?
- Are you surprised?
- Come on, Otis.
We're going to have
the best weekend ever!
[Otis bleating]
- Oh, so cute.
MAN: ♪ Well, hello, let's go ♪
♪ Everybody must know ♪
♪ Love in my heart
like a b*mb ♪
♪ It's blowin' a song ♪
♪ Inside I'm singin' ♪
♪ Sunshine that
you're bringin' now ♪
♪ And it makes me happy ♪
♪ Everything I need ♪
♪ Handed from above ♪
♪ I can't get enough
of your love ♪
♪ 'Cause it makes me happy ♪
♪ You meet me in the middle ♪
♪ The game just got
so simple now ♪
♪ And it makes me happy ♪
♪ Yeah, you make me happy ♪
♪ Save those rainy days
for another time ♪
♪ I'm just here to say ♪
♪ Read between the lines ♪
[Otis bleating]
♪ I'm so glad
that you're mine ♪
♪ 'Cause you make me happy ♪
♪ You make me want to sing ♪
♪ Do do do-do-do do ♪
♪ Do do-do-do-do ♪
♪ Do do do-do-do do ♪
♪ Do do-do ♪
♪ Do do do-do-do do ♪
♪ Do do-do do do ♪
- And I got this scar
when I was about 7.
See, I was riding my bike
on this insane hill,
and there's a canteen swinging
on the handlebars,
and it got caught
on my spokes.
- Hey, guys!
- Hey.
- Hi, Quinn.
- What's up, Otis?
[Otis bleating]
Aw.
- Um, did Quinn just walk
by here with an alpaca?
- Uh-huh.
- Yep, sure did.
- Weird.
[siren blaring]
- Okay, did Michael
just run by here
wearing a bikini top?
- And a hula skirt?
- Uh-huh.
- He did.
- Weirder.
ALL: Yeah.
- Definitely.
MAN: ♪ Well, hello, let's go ♪
♪ Everybody must know ♪
♪ Love in my heart
like a b*mb ♪
♪ It's blowin' a song ♪
♪ Inside I'm singin' ♪
♪ Sunshine that
you're bringin' now ♪
♪ And it makes me happy ♪
♪ Everything I need ♪
♪ Handed from above ♪
♪ I can't get enough
of your love ♪
♪ 'Cause it makes me happy ♪
[ding]
MAN: Mmm.
DEAN RIVERS: Life is hard.
02x12 - Quinn's Alpaca
Watch/Buy Amazon Merchandise
Series centers around Zoey Brooks as she enrolls in Pacific Coast Academy, a prestigious Southern California boarding school that previously only allowed boys to attend.
Series centers around Zoey Brooks as she enrolls in Pacific Coast Academy, a prestigious Southern California boarding school that previously only allowed boys to attend.