Ghostbusters: Afterlife (2021)

[bunniefuu]

[ominous music playing]

[thunder crashing]

[growling]

[energy humming]

[heavy thudding]

[growling]

[banging]

[growling]

[beastly howling]

[buzzing]

Ugh. Mom, I'm trying to eat breakfast.

Almost done.

-Aw, your moustache is really coming in.
-Mom!

[light buzzing]

-Phoebe!
-Ow!

I'm bleeding!

You made me bleed!

You'll live. Phoebe!

Uh-- What are you doing?

Neighbour's electricity is running out
of phase. I tied in, bumped us up to 220.

Now I can run my lathe.

And you didn't think to ask me?

I mean, you just demonstrate
zero aptitude for science.

-Uh-huh. Got it.
-You're better at other things.

-Like quesadillas.
-My hair dryer.

-Your quesadillas are excellent.
-Thank you.

[knock on door]

-Now what?
-[Trevor] Mom!

-[Callie] Really? You don't have legs?
-[Trevor] I'm not an adult.

I'm literally driving
to pick up a cheque right now.

You win lottery?

Kind of. My father died.

Relax. I didn't even know him.
I'm surprised he left me anything.

-Sounds like my father.
-Yeah?

Did your dad abandon your family
and move to the middle of nowhere?

No.

Look, I... I know I have not been
a reliable or consistent tenant.

But if you give me a week
to settle loose ends,

I'll be back with everything I owe.

[thud]

I can fix that!

Listen,

I wait for you to leave,

then I change locks.

♪ Three six nine
The goose drank wine ♪

♪ The monkey chew tobacco
On the street car line ♪

♪ The line broke
The monkey got choked ♪

♪ And they all went to heaven
In a little rowboat ♪

♪ Clap pat, clap pat ♪

♪ Clap pat, clap slap ♪

♪ Clap pat, clap your hand
Pat it on your partner's hand ♪

♪ Right hand ♪

♪ Clap slap, clap your hand
Slap your thigh and sing a little song ♪

♪ My mother told me
If I was goody... ♪

There it is.

This is Summerville.

-This is where your grandfather lived.
-And died.

Come on. Not a single bar?

There'd better be a bar.

That's funny.

[Trevor] "Behold,

there was a great earthquake.

The sun became as black as cloth,

the seas boiled,

the moon became as blood,

the skies fell.

Revelation 6:12."

That was normal.

Hey, maybe it's a good thing
you never met your dad.

Great. You didn't tell us
we inherited a m*rder house.

And just think.

Now all of this is ours.

Pheebs, be a dear
and break into your grandfather's house.

[lock clicks]

Nice.

Oh, boy.

Not a single photo.

Rats.

You gotta see the gold mine of junk
I found out back.

Great.

Oh, my God, this is so much worse
than I thought it was gonna be.

[rumbling]

Under the dining table now!

Phoebe.

Remember that summer
we died under a table?

Of course this place is built
on a fault line.

Probably just fracking.

It's fracking annoying, is what it is.

It's okay, we're only here for a week.

Um... Give or take.

What does that mean?

It means we're staying.

[Trevor] You said we'd only be here
for a week!

Yeah, well,
that was before we got evicted.

You said you had money saved up.

[Callie] That was before I had children.

To be fair,
you've never been good with money.

Thanks, Pheebs.

What's that?

How am I supposed to know?

Can I help you?

Uh-- Hi. We're the, um-- The--

This was my father's place.

Hi.

-Hi.
-Hi.

I'm Janine Melnitz. We spoke on the phone.

I was your father's--

You know, we were friends.

-Very sorry for your loss.
-It's okay.

You knew him better than me.
I should be sorry for your loss.

I just tried to keep the bills paid
on time, that kind of thing.

-Like a money manager?
-There was no money to manage.

He could barely keep the power on.

So he left us nothing?

Well, I wouldn't say that.

There is quite a bit of debt.

[Callie] Ms Melnitz,

I'm here to sign forms,

pack the silverware
and leave with a rent cheque.

Are you telling me
this place is worthless?

You mean,
aside from the sentimental value?

Are you going to that thing later?

-Yeah, probably.
-Where's my order?

I can't believe
a place like this still exists.

Can't believe we have to spend summer
in this heap. We have lives.

-You don't think I have a life?
-No. You're a mom. You live for us.

♪ Many nights roll by ♪

♪ I sit alone at home and cry over you ♪

♪ What can I do? ♪

I'll be right back.

Oh.

♪ When baby, it's you ♪

Hey. Maybe you will make
a friend out here.

Make them out of what?

I'm serious.

A new home could be
an opportunity to start fresh.

Keep an open mind.

[blues music playing]

Two taters, three Spinners,
grilled onions, one no cheese.

Lucky, there's--

-There's something wrong with the meat.
-I don't feel so good, Lucky.

There's something wrong.
He's throwing up the meat!

Cool place.

Yeah, I'll use that.

I don't own it.

I know you don't own it.

You look pretty young to own a business.

I saw the sign out front.

"Help wanted"?

I can be helpful.

Under experience,
you put "friendly" with a smiley face?

I didn't really know what to put.

[Lucky] I don't think "friendly" qualifies
as an experience.

It's a quality, I guess.

How old are you?

Seventeen.

Think you can put in a good word for me?

[Lucky] I can tell them you have a pulse.

My name's Trevor.

-My name's Trevor.
-My name's Trevor.

-Dude, that was great.
-Dude, that was really cute.

You have a chance with her. You really do.

So where you heading?

We're staying, actually.

You know that farmhouse
off the highway with the barn?

Dirt? It was my father's.

Dirt Farmer had a family?

You knew my father?

No one knew your father.

Well, I'm sure he'll be missed.

Nope.

What's up, Casanova?

Ow.

Damn it.

What?

[Callie] Come on! Bus leaves in 15!

Hey, Pheebs,

at school today, don't be afraid
to just start a conversation.

Are you kidding me?
That's horrible advice.

You're setting her up for failure.

Hey, how are the jokes coming along?

Why should you never trust atoms?

Because they make up everything.

-That's funny.
-No, it's not.

-You can drop me off here.
-Are you embarrassed?

Yeah. Bye.

[Callie] Love you!

That almost k*lled you.

Yeah, with your face.

What's wrong? You love school.

I love learning.

This is a state-sponsored work camp
for delinquents.

Fine. You can help me
scrape asbestos out of the attic.

I'll take my chances
with public education.

Hey, don't be yourself.

You okay?

Uh, yeah. First day. Can you imagine
who they've got teaching summer school?

I can. I teach here.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

No, it's okay. It's--

Most of the kids that go here,
they're not very bright.

Hey, Colin.

He's...

I can kind of do whatever I want.

Score.

Right?

-Dream job.
-Mm-hm.

Good morning, class.
How's everybody doing today?

My name's Mr Grooberson.

Um...

I know.

You don't wanna be here.
I don't wanna be here either.

Now, apparently,
your school is still operating on VHS,

but I found this gem
in the teachers' lounge.

It's great. It's called Cujo.

It's about a rabid Saint Bernard that--

You know what?
I don't wanna give too much away.

But imagine Beethoven
if he contracted rabies

and just started mauling children.

You'll get an idea.

Enjoy.

Speeding. Three, two, one.

She sits alone.

An outcast, rejected by her peers.

But what is her secret?

Perhaps she's on the run.

On the run...

from herself.

And go.

Actually, my grandfather died.

My mom says we're here
to pick through the rubble of his life.

So you're here to uncover
the mystery of his death?

No.

It was natural causes.

Are you sure it wasn't unnatural causes?

Yes.

Pretty sure it was just a heart attack.

Ah. The silent k*ller.

I'm Phoebe.

Cool. I'm Podcast.

Why do people call you Podcast?

I call myself Podcast.
Because of my podcast.

Doing some painting?

Yeah.

Whereabouts you staying?

Um, that old apocalyptic ranch off of 99.

It was my father's place.

Dirt Farmer had a family?

You all called him the Dirt Farmer?

Meant nothing by it.

Man spends every week
working a piece of land...

but never seeding, never watering,
never growing a ding-dang thing.

It's curious behaviour.

Great customer though.

He-- He bought some bizarre shit.

Yeah, that sounds like him.

[dog snarling and woman screaming on TV]

[rumbling]

What is this?

Hello.

Um...

There's a highly entertaining movie
about a k*ller dog

happening right over there.

Is this a seismic map?

-Yes. How did you know that?
-Because it's a map of seismic activity.

-Right. But--
-You're a seismologist?

Does that seem so hard to believe?

Figured you for a football coach.

Oh.

Um...

Thank you.

These don't look tectonic or volcanic.

Okay, smarty.

Here, check this out.

This is a volcano, all right?

It builds and crests.

But this is a tectonic earthquake.

Notice a little P-wave
followed by a large S wave.

Yeah, I'm not an idiot.

Clearly.

Well, this is the pattern in Summerville.

Large P-wave, small S wave.
Like an expl*si*n.

-Where is it coming from?
-I don't know. I don't know.

I set up geophones,
but I can't triangulate.

Are you using three?

Yeah. I know how many sides
there are in a triangle.

I just thought you were being obtuse.

Was that a geometry joke?

-Yes, that's why I winked.
-Ah.

Ah. That's terrible.

No, I loved it.

I mean, somehow, a town
that isn't anywhere near a tectonic plate,

that has no underground volcanic activity,
no fault lines,

no fracking, no loud music even,

is shaking on a daily basis.

Maybe it's the apocalypse.

[soul music playing]

Twenty-three, 24, 25.

Hey, no-skills. How's inventory?

How's it going?
No, it's not good. It's not good at all.

-Does everyone do this?
-Yeah, it's important.

You okay?

Your lips are literally blue.

Yeah, I'm fine.

-You should borrow my hoodie.
-No, it's fine. Seriously.

It's really masculine.

It's got a wolf on it. Trust me.

Okay.

I'm surprised it fits me.

-Yeah, it's my boyfriend's, actually.
-Oh.

Back to inventory.

[guys laughing]

Okay, we're speeding. Three, two, one.

Yeah, just introduce yourself
and tell me what you ate for breakfast.

Um. Phoebe.

Toast.

Okay, um, maybe a little more.
Tell me a joke or something.

-A joke?
-Mm-hm.

What do you call a dead polar bear?

Anything you want.

It can't hear you now.

Wow. That was funny.

You're funny.

Pretty hilarious joke.

Fun fact: Did you know Summerville
has more dead residents than living ones?

Yeah, that's how cemeteries work.

Wertheimers Hardware,
run by the llluminati.

-Lizard people.
-Lizard people?

Jefferson, Einstein, Beyoncé?
How do you think we got the pyramids?

-Slaves?
-Movie theatre.

That one's haunted.

I don't believe in ghosts.

What?

How can you--?

I mean, all the evidence.
You don't believe in spirits?

No.

I think we're all just
kind of meat puppets.

There's something you need to see.
I'll grab my wheels.

-Are we even allowed to be here?
-Oh, yeah.

Totally.

The mine's been closed since the '40s.

They just put all these signs up
'cause of hazardous chemical leaks

and on account of dynamite.

I do this.

The whole town was basically
a mining operation.

They bore out this mountain
like a grapefruit

and smelted everything
into cold-riveted selenium girders.

Why would you make a steel beam
out of an electro conductor like selenium?

Right?

Weird.

Until one day,

they were forced
to close down the whole enchilada.

Why?

One by one,
miners who had worked for years

began leaping down the mine shaft
to their death.

They called it the Shandorian curse.

[Phoebe] Who built these?

[Podcast] Depends who you believe.

One day, they just showed up
without explanation.

Cool.

What a shitbox.

So, what's your podcast about?

Oh, um, mostly mysteries and the unknown,
uh, conspiracy theories,

the occasional restaurant review.

Maybe I could check it out sometime.

-Really?
-Yeah.

The show really finds its voice
on Episode 46.

Okay.

Uh, hey.

Look, this is totally cool
if this is a "no." Zero presh.

Uh, but, um...

do you wanna be my lab partner?

Well, I don't think
we're gonna be doing any labs, but yeah.

Yeah, sure, I'd love to.

Cool, cool. All right.

Yeah.

Well, this is me.

The Dirt Farmer's house?

-Yeah, he was my grandfather.
-No way, dude!

So you're just gonna walk in?

Are you recording me?

Yeah, just in case
your body's pulled apart into tiny pieces

by an unseen dark force.

All right. Bye.

Okay, so this is happening.

Hello?

[girl screaming on TV]

No!

Hi, I'm Chucky. Wanna play?

I need to know what's lurking inside.

No way.

-k*ller replica.
-Totally.

A replica of what?

A trap.

A ghost trap.

Seriously? How do you of all people
not know about this?

-I'm ashamed.
-Ah.

I was obsessed. New York in the '80s,
it was like The Walking Dead.

-Then it just stopped?
-Mm-hm.

There hasn't been
a ghost sighting in 30 years.

Wait a minute.

This thing is real?

-Absolutely.
-Maybe.

I found it in my living room.

She lives on the Dirt Farm.

Oh, the really spooky one?

Yeah, the one that says "dirt" on it.

What happened in New York?

[Grooberson] The whole city
was freaking out.

Then these physicists showed up
with these portable proton accelerators

and blew the roof
off a Manhattan high-rise.

None of this rings a bell?

It happened 20 years before we were born.

I believe it.

[crowd] Ghostbusters!
Ghostbusters! Ghostbusters!

[Grooberson] I mean,

your, uh, dad never mentioned this?

It's just my mom.

Just your mom. Oh. Um...

Cool.

"Cool"?

I wonder if this still works.

Should we open it?

[bell ringing]

Glasses.

Two millimetres of plastic eye protection?

Are you sure this is safe?

Safe?

No.

No.

History is safe.

Geometry, that's safe.

Science is all particle accelerators
and hydrogen bombs.

Science is giving yourself the plague
and gambling on the cure.

Science is reckless.

Totally! Yes! It's punk rock.

It's a safety pin
through the nipple of academia.

-Ouch.
-Fire it up.

[engine starts]

I've always wanted to do this.

[snarls]

[screams]

Yes!

Uh...

We should probably get out of here.

You're an adult.

Yeah.

And liable.

You know what this means?

Your grandfather was a Ghostbuster.

Yes, I'm aware.

It has a door and windows,
like any ordinary house.

But the distinct smell of evil...

is prominent.

What are you doing?

Oh, um, giving a little colour.
Setting the mood.

It's creepy. I dig it.

Wow.

Cool.

Whoa. Aztec death whistle.

It's designed to ward off evil spirits.

It's got a really horrifying sound--

[whistle screeching]

What--?

What the hell is that?

-Aztec death whistle. Can I keep it?
-Yes. Just don't do that again.

Hi.

Hello again.

You brought them home.

It's a service I provide.

-Well, I'm also an escort.
-Mm?

-That came out wrong.
-Yep.

The truth is, I've always wondered
what lurked inside this haunt box.

Right. Well, the only thing lurking
inside here is my slowly dying soul.

Is that what that smell is?

Well, it's not dinner, so...

All right.

-Um. Would you...
-Sure.

-...like...?
-Yeah.

I don't have any food.

-It's fine.
-Tour.

-Great.
-Great.

[Callie] Here's the dining room.

I think Grooberson's
trying to bone your mom.

Oh.

That doesn't bother you?

No, of course it bothers me.

I just don't exhibit emotions
the same way everyone else does.

Inside, I'm vomiting.

Wait.

Isn't this what we saw earlier?

"The Sumerians believed
in a land of the dead,

a dark and shadowy realm
within the bowels of the earth.

The souls of the dead are ruled
by a mighty god, Gozer,

and protected by a powerful Gatekeeper

and Keymaster,

in order that Gozer might rise up
and walk the human plane again.

The Gatekeeper and Keymaster
must assume the form of beasts."

What did we let out?

Yum.

-Has this ever been cleaned before?
-Not by me.

We're heading up the mountain.

You coming?

♪ I once had a life
Or rather, life had me ♪

♪ I was one among many
Or at least, I seemed to be ♪

♪ Well, I read an old quotation
In a book just yesterday ♪

[ominous music playing]

Rivers are like the moms of canyons.

When you think about it.

[Lucky chuckles]

[Trevor] Why'd you bring me up here?

Entertainment value.

Can you juggle?

[g*nsh*t]

[laughing]

[boy] It's not funny.

What are you doing here
in Summerville anyway?

Honestly, my mom won't say it,
but we're broke.

We got evicted,
and the only thing that's left in our name

is this creepy, old farmhouse
our grandfather left us

in the middle of nowhere.

No offence.

I'm not offended.

This place is a dump.

Why do you live here?

I'm fourth-generation dump, so...

Think you'll ever leave?

I mean, if I don't,
what does that say about me?

You don't have a car.

[loud thud]

What the hell? Get out.

[growling nearby]

What is that?

I don't know.

[demonic voice] Gozer.

What was that?

[all laughing]

It's not funny.

[Grooberson] What is this?

That's a map.

Yeah, I know it's a map.

But this thing's ancient.
It's written in some kind of cuneiform.

Oh, yeah?

This is Summerville.

-That doesn't make sense.
-No, not at all.

Summerville's not even 100 years old,

but this thing's written in a language
from thousands of years ago.

For all I know,
that's the language he spoke.

That's it?

You don't think this is incredible
and bizarre and fascinating?

Can I have this?

Yeah, sure. Weirdo.

That's how it starts. First there's a map.
Then you move into a haunted house.

Then everyone's calling you
the Dirt Farmer.

What about Phoebe?
Think she'd want any of this?

Oh, I'm sure Phoebe will find something.

[Callie laughing]

Hello?

[clicking nearby]

Two of the CRT emitters are missing.

Thanks.

How on earth did you build
such a small cyclotron?

Got it. You're a genius.

Needle-nose pliers?

Are you troubled by strange noises
in the middle of the night?

Do you experience feelings of dread
in your basement or attic?

[Peter] Have you or any of your family
ever seen a spook, spectre, or ghost?

[Ray] If the answer is yes,
then don't wait another minute.

Pick up your phone
and call the professionals.

Ghostbusters.

Our courteous and efficient staff
is on call 24 hours a day

to serve
all your supernatural elimination needs.

We're ready to believe you.

Hey, you're awake.

What are you up to?

Experiments.

Ugh. Lame.

Oh, you found popcorn.

What kind of scientist was Grandpa?

The kind that repels loved ones.

Maybe a physicist?

Sure.

So tomorrow I was thinking
of grabbing dinner with Gary.

Who's Gary?

Mr Grooberson.

His name is Gary Grooberson?

-You have a date with Gary Grooberson.
-It's just dinner.

Good night, Phoebe.

Don't be yourself.

Welcome to Rust City.

This is where they processed
all the raw selenium?

Yeah, I guess.

Cool.

How'd you know how to fix it?
I mean, no offence, but you are 12.

I kind of met my grandfather last night.

He showed me what to do.

No way. Was he, like,
howling and clanking chains?

No. That would've been weird.

Switch me on.

[humming loudly]

[whirring]

Safety's off.

Her feet are planted.
Her face is poised.

Will this be the moment of her death?

Nobody knows.

Yeah!

[laughing and whooping]

Oh, my gosh.

That is the best thing I've ever seen.

Did I hit it?

You didn't hit it. You destroyed it!

It doesn't even exist anymore!

My turn.

[faint howling in distance]

What was that?

Probably a pigeon or something.
Give me the g*n.

[ghostly warbling]

What is that?

Come on.

Hold on.

You coming?

I'm coming.

Oh!

I gotta come back here
for my Halloween episode.

[screeching and grunting nearby]

[squealing]

It's a ghost.

Aren't you just a little bit freaked out?

Overstimulation calms me.

[loud clang]

-Okay, okay, okay.
-What's that for?

I have a plan.

Wait!

[whistle screeching]

[roaring]

-Get the trap!
-Okay.

I got him!

Quick!

-Nuggets! [yells]
-Catch him!

Okay.

[engine struggling]

Come on!

Come on, you can do this.

Come on, darling.

[engine starts]

Yes!

[punk rock music playing]

Yes!

Shit!

Hey.

Hey.

This is Podcast.

He's my friend.

You have a friend?

You have a car?

Yeah, it's a Cadillac.

Hey, dude. We need a ride.
Do you know how to drive?

He doesn't.
He failed his driver's test three times.

Get in the back.

Thank you.

It sounds crazy, but Oklahoma never
had earthquakes. For centuries.

But then, between 2010 and 2016,
they had like a thousand.

Oh, jeez, what happened?

Oil and gas, that's what happened.

Yeah, they started pumping
millions of gallons of salinated water

deep into the Arbuckle Formation.

And then the porous limestone...

Are you drunk?
Or are you just really bored?

Because I think
I can see you falling asleep.

Uh, I just have an allergy to science.

Ah. Have you tried Benadryl?

I've tried whisky.

It's better than Benadryl.

But science is amazing. Science is pure.

It's an absolute.

I mean, it's an answer to all the madness.

Why don't you like science?
Was Phoebe's dad a scientist, or...?

-Oh, gross. No.
-No?

I'm making an assumption.

What's his deal?

Honestly, it doesn't matter.

He was fine with Trevor,
but with Phoebe, he just really--

He couldn't connect with her, so...

Right. Well, he sounds
like a royal dirtbag.

Oh, no, he was actually
just a very ordinary dirtbag.

Well, hey, at least
Phoebe turned out okay, right?

I hope so.

I don't know.

She really keeps me on the outside.

She's just an awkward, nerdy kid,
but she's awesome.

I think she's great.

I think you're great. You're a great mom.

Yeah. You showed up. You win.

I just wish she'd relax, you know?
Just get into some trouble.

There's plenty of time for that.

Maybe she'll take up pole dancing.

-She's not very coordinated.
-Oh, I don't think that matters.

So, what the hell is going on?

In the 1980s, New York City was att*cked.

-I know the Manhattan ghost stories.
-The stories are real.

And so were the guys who climbed
a building and saved the world

and fought back
an invading army of the undead.

Not to mention
a 100-foot marshmallow man.

Our grandfather was Egon Spengler.

He was a Ghostbuster.

[officer on radio] All units,
we're getting reports of, well,

some kind of animal taking
a bite out of Steve Fletcher's truck.

Apparently, he almost took
the whole tailgate off?

-Muncher.
-Muncher.

-So, what should I be looking for?
-Evidence.

Can you stop breathing in my ear?

No.

You guys, this is kind of stupid.

Are you sure
you didn't see, like, a raccoon

or, like, a possum?

There!

Is that a--?

[Podcast] Free-floating metal muncher.
Definitely Class Five.

Okay, uh, what do we do?

Let's get him.

What?

Let me get a photo first.

Guys?

It has a gunner seat?

[squeals]

Go, go, go!

Whoa!

[screaming]

What the--?

-Yes!
-Trap him!

Okay. Okay. Here we go.

[horns honking]

Come on, keep it straight.

You try driving this thing.

Left, left, left!

Ready!

Trap him already!

-Three, two--
-Three, two--

One.

[screams]

♪ On the road again ♪

Oh, my God, what just happened?

He's heading for the mountain.

-Closer.
-Okay.

I'm in range.

She got him!

Whatever we're doing,
we have to do it now.

Come on!

[shrieking]

[shrieking]

Whoo!

-Yes!
-Yeah!

Bridge!

[screaming]

[continues screaming]

-What was that?
-I think we just caught a ghost.

[Phoebe chuckling]

-Oh.
-Uh-- Sorry.

I was here last night.

[Trevor] Does any of this bother you?

-What do you mean?
-Dude, your grandfather was a legend.

You can literally be anything you want.

Like a influencer or a DJ.

It was easier when I thought he went nuts.

-He didn't go nuts.
-Exactly. So why did he leave Mom?

[siren wails]

Oh, no, no, no.

-We're screwed. We're so screwed.
-[Phoebe] What do we do?

-I say we fight.
-What? No. Just check the glove box.

[knocks]

[Sheriff] Licence and registration.

[Trevor] We were on that big mountain,

and then I went to go hang out
with this girl in this mining cage.

All of a sudden, it started shaking,
like an earthquake.

And there were lights,
and then I looked down in this giant hole.

Inside of it, right in the middle of it,
was either a person or a reptile--

Are you even paying attention?

Yeah. I'm just excited we're in jail.

I thought I heard something say, "Gozer."

[Lucky] He speaks the truth.

I was there.

Hey. Hi. How--? What brings you here?

Actually, you could help me
with hiding something.

Do you have priors?
'Cause they'll charge you as a minor.

You'll get two years, max.

-Two?
-I'll visit you, okay?

Lucky. Quit messing with my inmates.

Sorry, Dad.

"Dad." So you're just...

Waiting for my ride. Yeah.

But you look good behind bars.

Hey. Don't we get a phone call?

Sure you do.

[dramatic music playing]

Who you gonna call?

Make it quick.

Do you experience feelings of dread
in your basement or attic?

Have you or any of your family ever seen
a spook, spectre, or ghost?

If the answer is yes,
then don't wait another minute.

Pick up your phone
and call the professionals.

[ringing]

[grumbles]

-Ray's Occult, and we're closed.
-[Phoebe] Wait! I only get one phone call.

I'm...

-in prison.
-Huh.

The slammer, huh? I've been there myself.

I'm not a lawyer, but I'm listening.

Are you Ray Stantz, the Ghostbuster?

-And now I'm hanging up.
-Hang on. Please.

I'm calling about Egon Spengler.

Egon Spengler can rot in hell.

He died last week.

Oh, man.

No kidding.

-Weren't you two friends?
-That was a long time ago.

What happened to you guys?

Oh, well, look, when we started,
busting ghosts was a gas.

The economy was good. Reagan years.

People believed in us.
Then things got slow, hauntings got thin.

Venkman thought we did our job too well.

We could barely keep up our mortgage.

Some actor bought up most of Tribeca,
and we lost the firehouse.

It's a Starbucks now.

-So then you all just walked away?
-Peter went back to academia.

He's at SUNY Cortland now.
He's a professor emeritus.

He teaches advertising and promotion.

Winston went into finance.
He worked hard, coined a fortune and--

And I'm here.

-Well, what about Egon?
-Well, he wasn't helping.

We went from ten calls a week
to one if we were lucky.

Egon started to tell people
that their ghost problems didn't matter

because the world was coming to an end.

He got spooky. Freaked me out.

One morning, I go to work
and Ecto-1 , our old Cadillac, is gone,

his neutrona thrower,
collider pack, all the traps,



He cleaned us out.

Now we were the dead ones.

-Don't you think he had a reason?
-He phoned me about ten years later,

some small town in Oklahoma.

He kept rambling about "the rising storm"
and "the huge psychic tornado"

that was gonna "consume humanity
in darkness forever."

And, kid, I wanted to believe.

You don't understand.

There is this mountain
and it has these ancient carvings--

Kid, there are a lot of mountains
with ancient carvings.

Take a little advice.

Don't go chasing ghosts.

Egon Spengler was my grandfather.

[Sheriff] Time's up.

-Hey, hello?
-[clicking]

-Where are my kids?
-They're in the lockup.

My children are not criminals.

-Sure they're not.
-Driving without a licence.

Expired registration.

Speeding.

-They can't be the first to go joyriding.
-[Sheriff] No, they are not.

But they are the first
to destroy half of Main Street

with whatever that thing is.

Whoa.

[handcuffs clinking]

-Sorry.
-What were you thinking?

You know,
you two could have really hurt yourselves.

[sighs] Hey. I'm Gary.

[Sheriff] You process them out yet?

-Did you catch anything?
-[whispers] It's inside the trap.

-[whispers] Right now?
-Yes.

Let's go. You were supposed
to look after her this summer.

-I was?
-Not you. Him.

-This was her idea.
-But what about our stuff? The Ecto-1 ?

Everything will remain nice and safe
in our impound locker.

-No! We need it.
-Phoebe, let's go.

We caught a ghost tonight.

-Dirt Farmer's family.
-[Phoebe] It's true.

And there will be more.

You're starting to sound
like your lunatic grandfather.

-[gasps]
-Phoebe! She didn't mean it.

You wanna spend the night in my jail?

You can keep it.

Go. Now.

-Trevor.
-I'll see you at work.

Yeah. See you.

Hey.

All right, you guys.

-Remember that--
-[Callie sighs]

Yeah, you got it.

I'm sorry the night went sideways.

No. I had a blast.

Why don't we just pick it up
tomorrow night, same time.

-You really want more of this?
-Are you kidding me?

We had kung pao shrimp. We went to jail.

I don't know how we're gonna top this.
This is a home run.

My life is a dumpster fire.

I love dumpster fires.
You should see my apartment.

I don't mean now. Or anytime soon.

You don't want to-- I'd need to clean--

This is moving way too fast.
You gotta just relax.

The kids hungry? They want
some of this unrefrigerated shrimp?

-We're barely hanging on here.
-You don't understand.

I understand you drove around town
destroying expensive property.

Don't you think
your father came out here for a reason?

No.

I think he was a sad old man who turned
his back on his family, his partners.

And for what? For a stupid farm
in a town nobody cares about.

Where, by the way,
everybody thought he was nuts.

Yeah, great decision, Dad.

He was special. He loved science, like me.

Why didn't you tell me
my grandfather was Egon Spengler?

Hey, I'm glad
you found yourself here. I really am.

But all I see are reminders
that I didn't mean a thing to him.

He never cared about me.

He's not nuts.

Well, then he's an assh*le.

Welcome to the family.

[thunder crashing]

[eerie music playing]

[growling]

Yeah.

-[woman screams]
-[objects clattering]

Jamoca.

There we go.

Strawberry, red velvet...

Blue velvet? [chuckles]

[rustling]

[yawns]

[cooing]

[squeals]

[chuckles]

[babbling]

[grumbles]

[groans]

[all shouting and babbling]

Oh, God.

[shouting and babbling]

[glass shattering]

[grunting]

[growling]

[babbling]

[snarling]

-Hey--
-[growls]

[yelling]

-[growling]
-[whimpering]

[air hissing]

[roars]

[Trevor] Okay, so, what exactly
is happening with the map?

See the concentric circles
around the mountain?

No.

-Do you see the circles?
-Yes.

Something's happening
inside that old mine.

Yeah. I know that. It's pretty obvious.

So I did some digging on the word
you heard in the mountain. "Gozer."

You did some digging?

Gozer was a Sumerian god
who once walked amongst the living.

A soul-eating,
flame-dripping deity of evil.

And I think it wants back.

Here?

I know. I would've picked Orlando.

What does
the name Ivo Shandor mean to you guys?

Ivo Shandor? He built this whole town.

He built the mine, foundry,
the school, library.

-His name is on everything.
-That's tacky.

In New York, he created an apartment
building made out of selenium girders,

mined from right here.

On that same rooftop is
where our grandfather fought

to keep a horde of ghosts
from entering our dimension.

Phoebe, what exactly is happening here?

I can only think of one way
for us to find out.

[clanging and creaking]

So, what do a cigarette
and hamster have in common?

What?

They're both harmless until you stick one
in your mouth and light it on fire.

[Trevor] The worst time.

[mysterious music playing]

Hey, guys, look.

[Trevor] Is that her?

Is that Gozer?

[Phoebe] Gozer isn't he or she.

Pretty woke for 3000 BC.

[Trevor] Everyone watch their steps.

[Phoebe] Another hole?

[Trevor] I wonder where this one leads to.

A sacrificial death pit.

-What were they sacrificing?
-Virgins, probably.

Tough luck for you, dude. Sorry.

Well, statistically,

-most 15-year-olds are virgins.
-Shh. Uh...

Fifteen? You're 15?

I'll be 16 in February.

It's June.

What are those holes in the wall?

They're vacancies.

If this is a tomb,
where are all the bodies?

[Podcast] Found one.

Oh.

-What?
-[Trevor] Oh, my God.

Is he sleeping?

Dude, he's in a coffin.

[Podcast] It's Ivo Shandor.
He's been in here for 75 years?

He looks fantastic.

You know when you die,
your fingernails keep growing.

Not true. Your skin just shrinks.

[Phoebe] Something was coming
and he knew it.

I think these are years.



The Krakatoa eruption.

The most violent volcanic activity
in human history.

[Trevor] What happened in 1908?

[Podcast] Probably the Tunguska blast
over Siberia.



[Phoebe] 1984.

Ghosts attack New York City.

The Manhattan Crossrip.

-It's a countdown.
-Like a prophecy?

-[ghostly moaning in distance]
-Do you guys hear that?

Yeah, I do.

I think it's coming from the death pit.

[Podcast whimpers]

[eerie moaning and rumbling]

Phoebe.

[proton packs whining]

Phoebe!

The earthquakes.

-[gasps]
-[Podcast gasps]

-[screams] Oh, my gosh!
-Phoebe!

[ghostly voice] Phoebe.

Phoebe.

I think he's alive.

-Are you okay?
-Yeah. Yeah.

-Are you?
-Yeah.

[Trevor] Pheebs, what's wrong?

[Phoebe] He was right all along.

-[Podcast] What do you mean?
-Our grandfather.

He was right here. He built this.

He was standing guard,
even when no one believed him.

He sacrificed everything.

His life.

His friends.

Us.

Bummer.

Dude.

We need to tell Mom.

[Callie] Phoebe?

Pheebs?

[sighs]

[humming]

[mysterious music playing]

[creaking]

[low growling]

[roars]

[ominous music playing]

Mom?

Mom?

[whispering] There is no Mom.
There is only Zuul.

Mom, are you okay?

[in demonic voice] There is no Mom.
There is only Zuul.

-What's happening?
-[panting]

[Phoebe] Mom?

Is she okay?

-Mom?
-[device humming]

[roars]

Are you the Keymaster?

-Um, I don't know.
-Mom!

-Mom, stop.
-What do I do?

-[growling]
-Whoa!

[rumbling]

[growling]

Mom!

What the hell is going on?

[Podcast] What is all this?

This isn't a farm.

It's a trap.

[dramatic music playing]

What?

Nothing.

This is what he's been working on
all those years.

-[Trevor] Building this model?
-[Lucky] The detail is amazing.

No, he came here to finish
what the original Ghostbusters started.

-To trap Gozer...
-Out in that dirt field.

Exactly. These big silos
act as a capacitor.

-What's a capacitor?
-Would it k*ll you to read?

Would it k*ll you to just tell me?

Once activated, these towers
can hold a charge for one moment.

But in that one moment,
they can power hundreds of traps.

So how do we get Gozer into the field?

-Gozer's protected by two evil spirits.
-The Keymaster and the Gatekeeper.

She needs both of them.
No Gatekeeper, no Gozer.

First these spirits must possess
two human souls.

-Like Mom.
-So they can unite...

formally.

-What are we talking about?
-We're thinking at least third base.

Go, Mom.

[eerie music playing]

[in demonic voice] I like your eyes.

[growling in demonic language]

Thanks.

[people screaming]

[static and whining over radio]

[growling and screaming over radio]

They were just here.

[Lucky] There she is.

-[Podcast] Got anything?
-No, just more stupid g*ns.

A jail inside a jail.

What are you talking about?

No, no, no!

It's an ANSI Class One
electromagnetic deadbolt.

I believe in you.

It's unpickable.

[suspenseful music playing]

-What are you doing?
-I have a plan.

-Wait!
-[shrieking]

[Podcast] Come on. Let's go.

Okay.

-Ready?
-I'll be waiting.

[engines start]

[siren wailing]

[intense music playing]

That's my mom.

What?

[roaring]

[Shandor] Your Eminence. Goddess of Gods.

I have built this temple for you,

so that you might return to Earth...

and together...

we...

We can rule the world.

[growling]

[screaming]

[growling]

-[growling]
-[Phoebe] Excuse me.

Uh, pardon me.

Yeah, hi.

Uh...

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

A "fsh."

[Phoebe chuckles]

Uh...

A whale--

There's two whales in a bar.
One of them goes:

-[growls]
-[Phoebe mimics whale song]

And then the other one goes:

"Go home. You're drunk."

Uh...

Okay. Um...

So a grasshopper walks into a bar...

and the bartender's like,
"We have a drink named after you."

Then the grasshopper's like:

"You have a drink named Steve?"

Have you come
to offer yourself in sacrifice?

What?

Are you prepared to die?

No, I'm 12.

Are you?

[button clicks]

[roaring]

Mom!

[powering up]

-Wait, wait. What's going on?
-Hey!

-What's happening? Where am I?
-It's okay.

-You were possessed.
-Possessed?

-Then you turned into a dog.
-Then you got humpy.

-Humpy?
-[Trevor] Hold on!

Oh, Phoebe. Phoebe.
There's this secret basement...

-We know.
-...with computers and equipment.

-Isn't that place insane?
-Yes!

-And it seemed like he had a plan.
-We're aware.

Oh, oh.
And there were all these photos of me.

Like he was tracking my entire life.

-How rewarding.
-Super news. We wanna hear about it.

Yeah, but we're trying
to save the world right now.

Cool. I'm in.

-How can I help?
-[growling]

-No!
-What the hell was that?

-That was your boyfriend, Gary.
-Boyfriend?

-Inside that trap is the Gatekeeper.
-Gatekeeper?

If the Gatekeeper
and the Keymaster reunite--

-Keymaster?
-One second.

Phoebe.

You're... You're...

I'm a scientist.

-We got her!
-Yes!

This was Grandpa's plan.

Uh, coming in hot!

[siren wailing]

[screaming]

[Phoebe] Mom, come on!

Oh, my God.

[eerie music playing]

-Get back. Get back.
-Mom.

-What's up?
-Hey.

No, no, no.

[growling]

Pull the lever.

Pull--?

[energy whirring]

[shrieks]

Hey!

-[powering up]
-[growling]

Come on, what are you waiting for?

I'm waiting for this thing to work!
It's not working!

-[babbling]
-[Trevor gasps]

[screaming]

-Mom, hit the pedal!
-Pedal?

Lucky!

Podcast, what are you doing?

I've got my own problems!

[growling]

[shrieking]

[screaming]

[growling]

Oh, no.

No.

[man] Hey, flattop.

Have you missed us?

-[Ray] Gozer the Gozerian,
-[babbling]

In the name of the county of Summerville,
state of Oklahoma,

the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service,
all the members of Ducks Unlimited,

the Association
for the Advancement of Retired Persons,

I command you
under the National Invasive Species Act

to depart this world immediately.

Bravo.

[growling]

I think she remembers us.

Are you...

a god?

-Ray?
-Oh, come on, Ray.

Yes.

Yeah, we're all gods.

Yeah, I mean,
we're all pretty dang special down here.

On a personal note:

I thought that we had busted up for good.

It wasn't working for me.

My friends didn't think so.
I know yours didn't.

Okay, playtime's over.
Let's toast this muffin.

Light them up.

[powering up]

Man, I love that sound.

-[growling]
-[Peter] On the count of three.

Go on "two." One. Two.

Yeah, nothing stings
like a billion electron volts!

-[growling]
-Yes!

-Do you feel that?
-Yeah. Uh-oh.

She's uncrossing the streams!

-[Phoebe] No!
-[shrieks]

Are they dead?

[groaning]

I don't remember
this job being so painful.

-I do.
-You got a lot of nerve.

[roaring]

Coming back here, crawling back to me.

We could've been
the most spectacular power couple.

You know, my sense of fun
and your personality.

But, no, you always
had to vanquish and conquer.

Always had to maim somebody.

And that's probably
the number one reason why--

Good try, anyway.

Now we're finished, babe.

We're finished.

No.

[dramatic music playing]

Come on, Phoebe.

Holy shit.

[babbling]

[screaming]

We're on!

[triumphant music playing]

[screaming]

[growls]

[weapons powering down]

[dramatic music playing]

I thought you might turn up.

I'm sorry...

I didn't believe you.

I should've called.

I miss you, my friend.

Are you okay?

-You scared the shit out of me.
-Mom.

[muffled] I can't breathe.

Okay.

Hi there.

Pete Venkman from the home office.

-Thanks for pitching in.
-You're welcome.

I like your style.

Who's that one?

Callie.

Uh...

Callie Spengler.

-Spengler?
-Mm.

-Weird name. Try to make the best of that.
-[chuckles]

All right. We're gonna have cocoa inside.

And some of us will have rum with it.

[Trevor] Lucky!

[muffled shouting]

-Oh.
-God. Hey. Hey, man.

-Are you okay?
-Yeah, I-- Yeah.

My hands hurt from galloping.

Oh, my God.

I totally thought I lost you.

Sorry about that.

-That was weird.
-Mm-hm. Yeah.

-I'm bleeding. Why am I bleeding?
-You headbutted a park bench.

-Oh, right. Yeah.
-Yeah.

-Hi.
-Hi.

-Back there, yeah.
-Yeah.

I mean, before we became dogs

and opened the gates of hell,
I think that maybe we--

Yeah. Yeah, I think so too.

-But then we saved the world, so...
-That's true.

[Ray] Are you all right, son?

You just singlehandedly defeated
a manifestation of Gozer.

You gotta be on my podcast.

Sure. What's it called?

Mystical Tales of the Unknown Universe.

M.T.U.U., that's you?

Wait.

You're my subscriber?

Really found its voice
in the 46th episode.

[Winston] What did they do to you?

Don't worry.

I'll take you home,
get you all cleaned up.

Go.

Hey.

[dramatic music playing]

[sirens wailing]

["Ghostbusters" theme playing]

♪ Ghostbusters! ♪

♪ If there's something strange
In your neighbourhood ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters! ♪

♪ If there's something weird
And it don't look good ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters! ♪

♪ I ain't 'fraid of no ghost ♪

♪ I ain't 'fraid of no ghost ♪

♪ If you're seeing things ♪

♪ Running through your head ♪

♪ Who can you call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters! ♪

♪ An invisible man ♪

♪ Sleepin' in your bed ♪

♪ Ow, who you gonna call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters! ♪

♪ I ain't 'fraid of no ghost ♪

♪ I ain't 'fraid of no ghost ♪

♪ Who you gonna call? ♪

♪ Ghostbusters! ♪

♪ If you're all alone
Pick up the phone ♪

♪ And call
Ghostbusters! ♪

[woman] Tell me what this is.

Lines.

Two--

No, three...

wavy lines.

[cheerful music playing]

-It's amazing.
-You're amazing.

With your ability to...

flood my psychic powers.

I can't believe
you used to shock your students.

Between us, I only zapped the guys.

-[electricity zaps]
-[screams]

It was flawed science.
I know that now. I admit that.

Ready?

Try this one.

[breathing deeply]

Take a moment.

Uh...

It's a five-pointed star.

-Yes?
-How are you doing that?

Some believe that true love
imbues a subject with the ability--

-[zapping]
-[grunting]

-Did you mark the cards?
-No.

You did, didn't you?

Yeah.

-[zapping]
-[yells]

It works well.

♪ You walked out the door ♪

♪ Then you want back in
The second it's cold outside ♪

♪ And you see I've got something to give ♪

♪ And I'd give it to you ♪

♪ A hundred times over
Till you screwed me over ♪

♪ Just like the last time
Saying it was the last time ♪

♪ I paid the price ♪

♪ Staying alone in my room
After what happened in June ♪

♪ Thinking I loved you
And maybe I still do ♪

♪ But I think you're honestly
Something I needed to lose ♪

♪ I know it's not healthy
It doesn't help me ♪

♪ But I do it anyways ♪

♪ Looking at photos
Reading the letters that you gave me ♪

♪ I could never throw them out ♪

♪ 'Cause a ghost never leaves
A haunted house ♪

♪ A ghost never leaves a haunted house ♪

♪ I get reminiscent ♪

♪ When somebody says your name ♪

♪ Almost glad I miss it ♪

♪ 'Cause it's better than
Not feelin' a single thing ♪

♪ Even after all the white lies
Empty goodbyes ♪

♪ All the tears and all the times ♪

♪ You weren't there
When I needed you to be ♪

♪ Hoping you're right you wanna be ♪

♪ Even if it's not with me ♪

♪ I know it's not healthy
It doesn't help me ♪

♪ But I do it anyways ♪

♪ Looking at photos
Reading the letters that you gave me ♪

♪ I could never throw them out ♪

♪ 'Cause a ghost never leaves
A haunted house ♪

♪ A ghost never leaves a haunted house ♪

♪ A ghost never leaves a haunted house ♪

♪ I think we're on our final scene ♪

♪ Keep us good in all our memories ♪

♪ So why do I have to throw them out? ♪

♪ A ghost never leaves a haunted house ♪

[orchestral theme playing]

[siren wailing]

-I want you to take this.
-What is it?

It's a souvenir from the World's Fair
at Flushing Meadow in 1964.

It's my lucky coin.

I shouldn't take it.
We might not be coming back.

Take it anyway. I got another one at home.

[dramatic music playing]

[Winston] Egon was the brains.

Ray was the heart.

Peter just kept it cool.

Mm-hm. Who were you?

The sex appeal.

You've done very well for yourself.

A lot of shelf space.

See, that's the thing.

I don't do it for me.

I do it for my kids,

and I wanna be an example
of what's possible.

You still covering the rent
at Ray's bookshop?

Ray's gonna turn a profit
one of these days.

[Janine] Ha. I remember
the day you came in.

[Winston] I came in looking
for a steady paycheque.

But busting ghosts with the guys...

taught me not to be afraid.

That I had the tools and I had the talent.

I started this business with one employee.

And I've grown it
into a thriving global enterprise.

I may be a businessman,

but I will always be a Ghostbuster.

[mysterious music playing]

[whirring and rumbling]