01x01 - Sole of a Hero/Night of the Living Guacamole

[bunniefuu]

[Animal roaring]

Announcer:miracle city,

A spicy cesspool of crime

And villainy.

This is the story of

Manny rivera,

Better known as...

Manny: [roars]

El tigre!

Son of the legendary hero...

White pantera!

Grandson of the evil

Super villain...

Puma loco.

[♪...]

Crowd: el tigre!

[Sirens wailing]

[Cheering]

El tigre!

[♪...]

[Roaring]

[Roars]

Crowd: el tigre!

Crowd: el tigre! [♪...]

[♪...]

Manny, I'm home.

How are you kids doing?

Bored.

There's nothing fun to do.

Fun is what you make of it.

For instance, today I battled

Giant squid creatures

Trying to steal the jeweled mule

Of maya.

Fun.

The leader escaped with

The mule, but I will find him.

This I swear!

[Laughing]

I thought you quit

Super hero-ing.

Technically, I'm retired.

But as long as there is evil,

And I am young and vital enough

To oppose it, I will.

You're super macho.

The macho-est!

Well, now time to have some

Cocoa with tiny marshmallows,

Then go sleepy-time, no?

[Snoring]

[Whistling "mexican hat dance"]

[Snoring]

[Whistling "mexican hat dance"]

You were right.

Watching your dad sleepis

Less boring than tv.

Hey, he forgot to take

His boots off.

[Sputtering]

He never takes off

The bronze boots of truth.

He gets all his white pantera

Abilities from them.

Oh, yeah?

And those abilities would be...

He can run, jump and fight

With super macho speed

And strength.

And anyone the boot soles touch

Is forced to tell the truth.

Once after eating ribs,

I wiped my hands on a dog.

Cool!

Dude, we gotta take these babies

Out for a spin.

We can't steal

My dad's boots.

Uh, not steal, "borrow."

We'll put them back before

He wakes up.

Hmm, iwillinherit them

Someday, so ishouldknow

How to use them, but...

You are a good son.

[Snoring]

[Snoring] [♪...]

[♪...]

[Electricity crackling]

[♪...]

[Electricity crackling]

[Sirens wailing]

Both: yee-haw!

Both: yee-haw! Woman: [screaming]

Woman: [screaming]

[Laughing]

[Electricity crackling]

[Rooster crowing]

What an awesome night!

Ha, ha!

You know it.

[Electricity crackling]

Manuel: oof!

Dude, we broke the boots.

Dad and grandpapi: [yawning]

Good morning, father.

Buenos diías, mijo.

Wait!

Something about you is...

Different.

You have...

A new hat?

No.

Oh.

We should talk like this

More often.

Well, I'm off to work.

Distract them.

[Gasps]

♪ La, da-da, da-da,

Da, dee, dee, dee ♪

♪ There's nothing going on

♪ Scootily-scottily,

Spootily-squee ♪

♪ A cat pooped on my lawn

♪ A cat pooped on my lawn

Ow!

Thank you, frida.

That was... Uncomfortable.

Eeh!

I am late.

Be good.

Not likely.

♪ A cat pooped on my lawn

♪ A cat pooped on my lawn thatiscatchy.

Thatiscatchy.

[Gasps]

El oso.

This is a job for...

[Electricity crackling]

White pantera!

Ooh...

El white pantera.

If I b*at him, my street cred

Will go through the roof, man.

[♪...]

[Oinking]

El oso.

Prepare yourself for my famous

Pantera power punch-kick.

[Boot sputters out]

[Grunts]

Dad: [screams]

You should stay retired,

Old man.

Crowd: [gasps]

[♪...]

Suddenly, i...

I lost my powers.

I was too weak to...

Fight evil.

Ah, that's how it is

With you heroes.

You get a little older

And you lose your powers

And you're all washed-up.

[Gasps]

[Sputtering]

When I say "washed-up,"

I mean clean.

[Laughing nervously]

Yes, "clean."

[Laughing nervously]

My, look at the time.

He is right.

It's over.

I'm just too old.

Dad, the truth is we...

Ah, at least I raised

A trustworthy son who places

Honesty and integrity

Above all else.

For without that,

I would surely wither away,

A bitter, heartbroken old man.

I'm sorry, you were saying?

Nothing.

Not a thing.

My mind's a blank.

What's there to say?

[Sighs]

[Flies buzzing]

Bah.

So how's your dad?

Well, he hasn't moved from

That spot for weeks.

All he does is eat caramels

And watch canadian soap operas

All day.

Don't talk to me aboot love,

Cammie.

You don't know anything

Aboot it.

[Crying]: boots.

≫ I can't stand it, frida.

I have to tell him the truth.

Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa.

You can't fight lies with truth.

You have to usebiggerlies.

It's simple mathematics.

Well, if it's mathematics...

Grandpapi, do you have any

Plutonium I could borrow?

Plutonium I could borrow? Sock drawer!

Sock drawer!

[Flies buzzing]

Looking good, dad!

Right you are, mr. Rivera,

Sir.

Say, father, would you show

Me how to do your famous

Pantera power punch-kick?

Of course, you'll have to put...

Theseon.

The boots!

No, they glow with

My unworthiness.

Oh, dad...

You promised.

Very well,mijo.

How do they feel?

Well, I don't remember

The searing pain in my feet,

But santa cachucha, I feel like

White pantera!

And slightly taller!

What are you doing?

Running fast.

Very, very fast.

Feel good.

Very, very good.

[Laughing nervously]

Uh, yeah, I bet you could

Take on villains at once.

A hundred villains.

[Speaking quickly]:

You're right, but where can I

Find villains?

I know, calavera,

And that fiendish el oso

Lives there.

He will pay for my

Ignominious defeat.

What?

[Gasps]: no!

You can't....

That evil town calavera

Is an evil pit of evil.

Yes, I will clean up

Evil calavera, evil town,

Defeat all evil villains,

Have revenge on evil el oso,

Now here I go.

Dad can't fight all those

Banditosandel oso by himself,

Not with his powers messed up.

Grandpapi.

Aye, what?

Jeweled mule?

Eh, this isn't mine.

I won it in a card game,

Found it in a cereal box,

I'm my evil twin.

Frida and I stole dad's

Boots and wrecked 'em,

And now they're out of control,

And he's gonna get slaughtered

In calavera!

Manny!

I have done great evil

In my life, but putting

Your own father in danger?

That's worse than evil!

You're right, grandpapi.

I guess there's only one thing

We can do to make this right.

Forget it ever happened?

Forget it ever happened? We must go to calavera.

We must go to calavera.

Evil doers, surrender now

And I will go easy on you!

[Growling]

White pantera: eep!

[Grunts]

I b*at you again, pantera.

You're too old.

You...

You're right, el oso.

Manuel: no, he's not.

There's nothing wrong with you,

Dad.

It's the boots.

I wrecked them.

And didn't tell you.

Thank you for trying

To raise my spirits,

But the truth is...

[Gasps]

Itwasthe boots.

What a relief!

I'm not too old.

I had merely been betrayed

By my only son.

And am powerless to stop

These bloodthirsty villains

From crushing me.

Hooray!

[Grunting and screaming]

[Roars]

♪ Spoodily-squadily,

Spoodily-squee ♪

Spoodily-squee ♪ [grunts]

[Grunts]

[Grunting]

[Grunting]

Eeh!

[Grunts]

Your papi cannot help you

Now, el tigre.

I beg to differ.

El oso: best two out of

Three...

Dad!

You b*at him without your boots.

Boots or no boots,

I always have the strength

To protect you,mijo.

They're perfect.

How did you get them fixed

So fast?

Is better you don't know.

Let's see if they work.

Papi.

I stole the jeweled mule

Of maya.

I'll go take it back.

I learned my lesson, dad.

I'll never stealyour boots

Again.

Ah, he's such a good boy.

Rodolfo, something's wrong

With my golden sombrero

Of chaos.

Manuel and frida: ♪ a cat

Pooped on my lawn... ♪

Pooped on my lawn... ♪ Yeah!

Yeah!

Yeah! [♪...]

[♪...]

[♪...] Grandpapi: [sings in spanish]

Grandpapi: [sings in spanish]

Hey!

There's my chorizo shampoo.

[Laughs]

Manny, what are you up to?

Oh, nothing.

Helping the poor.

Ah, the poor.

Very good.

Oh, man, this is so good.

Manny!

[Screams]

I just spoke to the poor,

And you havenotbeen

Helping them.

[Gasps] a magazine...

Forsuper villains?

Uh, I only read it

For the ads, see?

A do-it-yourself laser

Tattoo maker.

Just think what I could

Do with it.

[♪...]

[Animal roaring]

Please can I have it?

Please...

Please?

[Sighs]

Manny, tattoos are evil.

Tattoos, piercings, hair dye,

Loose pants, refined sugar,

All evil.

Hmm.

Then I'm gonna hold my breath

Until you change your mind.

[Inhales loudly]

Very well.

If that is your decision.

Of course, if you asphyxiate,

You'll miss today's

Big soccer game.

Super heroes versus

Super villains.

Only once a year.

Family tradition.

And this year, we're having

A special treat...

[Exhales loudly]

[Breathing heavily]

O.k., What's the special treat?

Ah, the treat.

It is the most delicious food

Known to man: guacamole

De los angeles.

Made only from the finest

Avocadoes hand-picked by

Blind monkeys and crushed by

The delicate feet

Of virtuous ladies high in

The andes mountains.

It is very expensive,

But I have been saving money

All year, and at last,

We will taste the glory.

So where is it?

Hmm?

The, the guacamole.

I gave you the money to buy it

This morning.

≫what?

You gave me no money.

You can prove nothing.

Get that guacamole.

The game is about to start.

So you must hurry.

But I'll miss it.

Such is the price of

Treachery.

Grandpapi: you get it.

Dad: you get it.

Grandpapi: you get it.

Dad: you get it.

Grandpapi: you get it.

Dad: you get it.

I'llget it.

Please, father.

Allow me to please make up for

My earlier bad behavior

Earlier, please.

Dad: ah, what a good boy.

Grandpapi: no, he is evil.

Evil...

Manny: [roars]

Hi, mrs. Chichita.

Hola,manito.

[Laughing]

What you doing?

Watching the puppies.

[Screaming]

Frida, you gotta help me

Figure out what to do.

That's horrible, manny.

You can't steal your dad's

Money.

For something lame like

A slingshot.

No, next to the slingshot.

Frida: the tattoo maker?

Dude, you gotta buy it.

But you...

Don't listen to me, I don't

Know what I'm talking about.

Listen to me!

You have to buy it!

Just think how cool it'll be!

My son...

How could you betray me

Like this?

Buy it.

Tattoos are evil.

Buy it!

This will haunt you forever.

Buy it.

Echo.

Echo.

Buy it!

Ooh...

Buy it!

No, yes, no, yes, no!

Yes!

Manny and frida: whoa...

[Whispers]: tattoo maker.

Frida, I can't go home

Without guacamole.

The giant floating tattoo

Dad head won't let me.

Woman: perhapsican be

Of assistance.

I just happen to have

Something that might help you.

Guacamole de los anglos!

I don't know.

Mysterious old lady...

Emerging from the shadows...

Frida: seems kind of sketchy.

It's free.

Sold.

Sold. [Laughing]

[Laughing]

I knew the riveras had to

Buy that guacamole today.

Now they have fallen for

The totally brilliant trap of...

Dr. Chipotle, junior.

The filthy swine!

I remember when el tigre

And white pantera captured

My father.

He was minding his own business,

Using his jalapeño monster

To rob the miracle city bank.

And they took him!

For no reason!

That very night, I swore an oath

Of vengeance.

I... Don't... Like... You!

Now, at last, they will pay!

Weren't you just dressed up

Like an old lady?

[Fly buzzing]

This doesn't taste

How I expected.

He did it.

It was her idea.

He made me.

She hypnotized me.

It tastes...

Even better.

Whew.

[Loud chewing]

[Burping]

[Farting]

I guess we'll just be going.

Don't you want to watch

The game?

Manuel: no, thanks.

We're gonna gonotgive

Each other tattoos.

Yes, yes, yes, very nice.

[Burping and farting]

[Stomach growling]

Oh...

Aye, aye...

[Grunting and groaning]

[Screaming]

[Screaming]

Helping the poor!

Monsters.

Face the wrath of...

[Roars]

El tigre.

[Gasps]

Wait!

Those monsters...

They're dad and grandpapi.

[Roaring]

Acid guacamole.

So, el tigre, we meet again.

And you are... Who?

Dr. Chipotle, junior.

Son of dr. Chipotle, senior.

Uh, doesn't ring a bell.

The mad scientist?

Has a metal arm like mine?

On the cover of "villains

Quarterly" this month?

I just read the ads.

Wait, you're stinky ramirez's

Little brother.

Forget it!

My evil zombie guacamole

Has taken over your dad

And grandpa.

And I now command them both...

Destroy you!

Ha!

They would never hurt me!

Right, dad?

Whoa, almost never!

[Roaring]

Manny and frida: [screaming]

Hola,manito.

Manny: [grunting]

Grandpapi: [roaring]

We gotta get them

Back to normal.

How?

[Laughing]

Those pinheads will never

Discover my zombie guacamole's

One weakness: guacamole

De los angeles.

Really?

Thanks, dude.

Swine!

There's only one way to get

The guacamole de los angeles.

I've got to return

The tattoo maker.

Keep 'em busy.

Oh, they'll be busy.

Busy eating me!

[Clucking]

[Clucking] [grunting]

[Grunting]

[Grunting] sold out?

Sold out?

[Grunting]

Dude, you are fast.

[Breathing heavily]

Evil guacamole, eat this!

[Screaming]

[Screaming] [sputtering]

[Sputtering]

[Growling]

[Roaring]

[Laughing]

The power of the guacamole

De los angeles cannot penetrate

My creature's thick skin.

Ooh, burn on you!

[Screaming]

Gotta be...

Another way.

[Breathing heavily]

Frida: manny, no.

[Gulps]

[Gasps]

[Laughs]

[Laughs] [farting noise]

[Farting noise]

[Car alarm wailing]

[Screaming and crying]

You broke my monster.

This tv isn't even plugged in.

Hey, you're just a little kid.

Look, a thing.

Where?

Aw, man.

[Sputtering]

Wha...?

What's going on?

[Groaning]

Manny!

I'm o.k., Except for

My internal organs, bones

And skin.

[Groans]

He saved us all

From the evil guacamole.

Thank you, man-

Wait, what evil guacamole?

Duh.

The free stuff we got

From that creepy old lady

So manny could use your money

To buy the tattoo maker.

Dang.

Manuel pablo gutierrez

Sobrana equihua rivera,

What is going on here?

We can explain everything.

See, there were these aliens,

And, and then they grabbed

My face...

[Sighs]

No, frida, it's time to tell

The truth.

And worst of all,

I made you guys miss

The big game.

So you stole money from me

And you lied.

But you also risked your life

To save us and then told

The truth.

Let's see, what would be

An appropriate punishment?

[Breathing heavily]

How much... Longer?

Just about...

A year.

Manny: d'oh!

[Muttering]

Woman: [giggling]

Woman: [giggling] [♪...]

[♪...]

[♪...] [Cheering] f

[Cheering] f