Hey, Mrs. Tudjman,
is that a Tommy Hilfiger hairnet?
'cause that is tight.
What you got for us today, Mrs. Tudjman?
A little cajun chicken, candied yams,
homemade biscuits with honey butter?
Fish portion, steamed cauliflower,
lima bean.
That's okay. 'Cause I know
at the end of the line
you got a little homemade peach
cobbler for a brother.
Bread pudding.
Come on! That's the same
bread pudding from Monday.
Prove it.
I poked my finger in that one, Monday.
See, that's my poke mark.
My finger fits right in there!
You touched, is yours.
It's four days old!
Fresh.
Do you understand the words
that are coming out of my mouth?
Look, Mrs. Tudjman, fresh bread
pudding is moist. It sticks to the wall.
Old bread pudding does this.
It stuck.
It did not! Look.
-She did it.
-She did it.
Yes, but she's in a union!
Three days suspension.
Come on, Mr. Militich.
My pops is gonna k*ll me.
He'll be so mad, he'll k*ll me, too.
I'll be collateral damage.
Mr. Militich...
Isn't there something else
you could do to us?
I suppose I could come up with
something more... creative.
Hello, ladies.
-♪ I know you're doing your thing
-Yeah ♪
♪ Go 'head, smart guy ♪
-♪ Diggin' it baby, yeah
-Yeah go 'head, smart guy ♪
-♪ Uh, uh, uh, uh
-Yeah. Come on ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
Man, I smell like liver.
I hate to break it to you,
but you always smell like liver.
You know, liver's good for you.
Hey, Marcus!
Your night to set the table.
Oh, come on, pop. I've worked enough.
They got us prepping at a.m., serving
lunch, and cleaning pots after school.
Well, you nailed the vice principal
in a drive-by pudding incident.
What'd you expect?
I'm gonna lay down and
not get up for a week.
Man, I don't have
enough energy to lay down.
Then I guess you don't have enough energy
to go to Ryan's party tonight.
Shame. There was gonna be
a lot of good-looking girls there.
-I'm rested.
-Hey, got my second wind!
Hey, where's everybody going?
Ryan's party.
-That's tonight?
-Mm-hmm.
I better go change.
You better change into someone older.
This party is for mature adults only.
I can go if I want to. I'm in high school.
Yeah, in brain only.
But your body can't go to no parties.
You're not going even if they wanted you.
Why?
Because you're going
to Josh's birthday party tonight.
Oh, that's right.
But I won't know anybody there.
I haven't been to school
with those guys in three years.
But you already R.S.V.P'd to Josh's party.
Don't make me go to a kid party.
They're the same age as you,
and they want their party
to be just as cool as you do.
Come on. It won't be that bad.
Great. Bet I'll come home
with a Winnie the Pooh party bag.
It was going on all day yesterday.
Kelly wanted to hold hands with Hector,
so he hid in the bathroom
for like a half an hour.
What a pukehead.
You know, that's to be expected.
Developmentally speaking,
girls generally mature earlier than boys.
That's what I said. He's a pukehead.
I'm gonna go get some punch.
Everyone took a vote and decided
Jenny had to do it.
Jenny's the perfect one to do it.
-Well, Jenny finally got up enough nerve--
-Who's Jenny?
This girl in my class.
Ah. Go ahead.
-So, she finally goes to see Mr. Parsons--
-Who's Mr. Parsons?
Come on. You know Mr. Parsons.
Actually, I don't.
See, I don't go to your school.
Then why are you listening to this story?
I...
I don't know.
[sighs]
-Hi.
-Hi.
See Titanic?
Yeah.
Pretty great movie, huh?
Yeah.
You know the part
when he's at the bow of the ship--
the "King of the world" part?
Oh, yeah. That was pretty amazing.
It looked like so much fun.
The amazing part was,
they weren't on a ship.
They weren't?
No. See, they stood
in front of a blue screen
and projected a preproduced
re-imaged backdrop,
creating the illusion
they were on the doomed ocean liner.
It's called a "composite sh*t."
So, they weren't on the ship?
No, fascinating, huh?
Not really. It kinda ruins it.
So...
You hear about Hector?
He was dodging this dumb girl
named Kelly in the can.
I'm Kelly.
Aiee.
Hey, who's that?
T.J. Henderson.
Smart T.J.?
Hey, remember me? Kevin.
Kevin. From the slow-reading group?
Kevin! Hey, what's happening?
Hey, you're rich, right?
How you doing?
Man, you really disappeared.
He was too smart for our school.
So, I heard the army's got you making
poison bombs or something.
No. I heard they hooked his brain
up to a big computer or something.
Nah. I'm just in high school.
So, what's your favorite part
of high school?
Gym.
We got gym.
With high school girls?
Mmm.
Stretching... doing jumping jacks...
It's a beautiful thing.
[laughter]
Yeah, but we toe up things
in the fourth grade.
Remember when you took
Zander's peanut butter sandwich
and put that orange chemical in it,
and his mouth almost exploded?
It was tabasco sauce.
Yeah! Where'd you get that?
You know, I've missed you guys.
It's been great seeing you again, man.
Want something to drink?
Sure.
That's beer.
See? I told you he was smart.
We figured a high school guy like you
would want a beer on a Friday night.
Well... you know, I'm trying to cut down.
Don't want a six-pack
to ruin this six-pack,
you know what I'm sayin'?
Thanks, anyway.
Well, listen, we're gonna hang out
here and drink these, so I don't know.
Maybe you'd have more fun at the party.
I hear they got a piñata.
I bet they got juice boxes out there, too.
Nah. I don't think so.
Not much out there for me.
Party ain't happening, man.
There's only one way to get through it.
So, here's to... uh... uh...
-Beer.
-Yeah, beer.
Yeah... beer.
[rhythm & blues playing]
Oh, that's it right there! That's my jam!
Hey, Kel! Kelly-Kel!
Come on, don't leave me out
here lonely, baby.
Oh. Oh, I got it. You just don't want me
to embarrass you on the dance floor.
Don't sweat it. Just do
whatever you can do, baby.
Come on, yeah!
Watch out now.
You idiot!
I'm sorry.
Here, let me help you.
No. Just get away from me!
Hey, sleepyhead, you hungry?
[clangs spatula]
No. No breakfast for me.
Oh, that's good 'cause I'm making lunch.
What time Marcus pick you up
from the party last night?
I don't know. It was late.
Uh, do we have any alka-seltzer
or anything?
Hey, little man, you don't look so good.
What'd you do at that party last night?
Uh... uh... nothing.
-What--what do you mean?
-I mean, did you eat too much cake again?
Oh, yeah, with a lot
of red frosting on it,
and I washed it down with
a hot dog and nachos.
That's not the best combination
of food groups, son.
Why don't you go on back to bed?
I'll get you some ginger ale.
Yeah, and maybe some aspirin.
My head hurts, too.
Well, sounds like somebody
partied hearty, huh?
You see any franks?
No, I don't see any franks.
So this would be beans and no franks.
Mix.
What the heck is that?
"Taste o' idaho.
"reconstituted potato-flavored flakes.
Now with % real potato"?
Is this what we been eating?
Mix.
See, there's your problem right there.
The reason why kids don't like the food
is 'cause... it's not food!
Now, I'm just gonna throw
something out here.
Now, what if for the mashed potatoes--
call me crazy--
we were to use, um, real potatoes?
We have a chance to do something better.
We could turn things around,
get kids excited about having lunch again.
What do you say?
Peel.
Hey, sweetie.
Oh, you're here.
Um, dad, listen.
Jennifer Carter's mom just called.
She said she heard there
had been some drinking
at the party T.J. was at the other night.
She wants you to call her
if you've heard anything.
Drinking... drinking? At a kid party?
That's what she said.
Yvette, these kids are years old.
It's not unheard of, dad.
Hey, T.J.,
could you come in here a minute?
You want me to go upstairs?
No. No, I'm sure it's just a mix-up.
Yeah, dad?
The mom of one of your friends
just called.
She said there might have been some
drinking at that party the other night.
Really?
Did she say who?
No.
So, I want you to tell me--
did you see anybody drinking?
Um, b-beats me.
I had my hands full
with the piñata and the cake.
So, you didn't see anybody drinking?
No.
Okay. Thank you.
Probably just some kids talking,
trying to sound grown-up.
Maybe.
What?
-Well, it's just--
-Just what?
Well, T.J. slept later than
he usually sleeps,
and he woke up and said he felt terrible.
He had a stomachache.
He also had a headache.
-So?
-So. Like a hangover to me.
You heard me ask him, Yvette,
and he said he wasn't drinking.
That wasn't what you asked him.
Okay, I asked him if there was drinking.
He said no, which means
he wasn't drinking.
Okay.
Listen, T.J. has always
been honest with me,
and he's too smart to get
involved with that stuff.
Okay, I'm sorry. You're probably right.
No. I am definitely right.
And when I need your help,
I'll ask for it.
seconds to lunch, man.
Oh. Let me kick it up a notch.
Paprika, it's the wonder spice.
Look what I drew here.
Ah! It's the symbol for the artist
formerly known as Prince.
I'm making food fun.
[school bell rings]
Lunch bell. Start food.
Come on in, come on in.
Afternoon, Mackey.
Anything I can get for you,
like some delicious mashed potatoes?
That wallpaper paste?
Save it for arts and crafts.
No, no. See, these here
are different, okay?
Here, taste.
It's different.
Of course they're different.
They're real potatoes. With garlic!
I'm allergic to garlic.
Yeah, yeah. So, how's it taste?
Not bad, except now I have to get a sh*t.
Thanks.
It's not tomato soup.
It's marinara meatballs.
They was holding together
a lot better when we opened.
Let me pack one together for you.
It's the symbol for Prince.
It looks like you spit on it.
It just lost its consistency.
A lot of hard work and sweat went
into this food, man!
Maybe it's the sweat that's making it run.
Run! [chuckles] You better run.
What is wrong with these kids?
They don't appreciate nothing!
Bunch of ingrates!
[laughing]
Hi, T.J.
Oh. Hey, guys.
What are ya doing?
Just, uh... working on my race car.
Listen,
did you guys know some parents heard
that there was drinking at the party?
Yeah. My dad asked me, and I told him
T.J. the high school kid was doing it.
What?
I'm just messing with you.
I wouldn't tell.
Well, it's not funny, okay?
Not as funny as you were at the party.
"Hey, Kelly-Kel!"
Ha! You were great! [chuckles]
Look, I don't wanna get caught,
so don't even joke about it.
Man, you need to relax.
Peppermint schnapps.
Uh... no, thanks. I quit.
Come on. It tastes like candy.
No. I'm busy.
Take a break. Come on, one sh*t.
Hey, what's going on here?
[door opens]
I thought you were dad.
No.
He's just sending Rich home with his dad.
What do you think he's gonna do?
Man, I don't know.
I can't believe you was drinking,
man. That's...
That's bad.
Thank you. I didn't know that.
Okay, okay.
But anyway, man,
I just wanted to let you know that
whatever happens, man, I'm here for you.
Bye.
So, you got anything to say?
Dad, I was never gonna
drink that. I swear.
You mean, the way you swore to me
there was no drinking at Josh's party.
Let alone that you were
the one doing the drinking.
Or maybe you wanna swear
you weren't drinking at that party, too,
which I don't recommend
because your friends downstairs
already ratted you out on that one.
No.
I was drinking at the party.
But I wasn't gonna do it in the garage.
You lied to me, T.J.!
How do I know you're not lying now?
-I'm not lying!
-Your word don't mean nothing right now.
-But--
-No. I don't wanna hear it!
From now on, there's no friends,
there's no parties,
there's no phones, there's no nothing!
You are grounded forever.
So, what's good today?
Food.
What am I supposed to do with this?
Eat.
Um... these are yesterday's potatoes.
Prove it.
What are you looking for?
Nothing.
I'm not looking for anything.
Yeah, I can tell.
Do you remember where I put that pamphlet
on how to talk to your kids?
-The one about alcohol?
-Yeah.
You threw it out,
along with the old phone books.
You said you didn't need it,
that you had good kids,
and it wouldn't come up.
Well, it did.
You were right...
and I got mad at you for it,
and I'm sorry.
Apology accepted.
And, dad, don't worry about the pamphlet.
I know everything that's in there.
They hammer it into us at school.
I even know what the parents
are supposed to do.
And what is that?
The first thing they say
is don't overreact.
Okay, I'm for .
The punishment should be well thought out
and proportionate to the crime.
for .
And the best thing you can do is
talk it over with your kids,
be aware that the risks are there,
and don't think it can't happen
to your kid.
That's good morning, good afternoon,
and good night.
Boy, how blind could I be?
He was sick, he was hung over,
he was sitting right here, right in front
of my face, and I didn't wanna see it.
How'd I miss it?
Because you still think
he's your little boy
and he's always gonna tell you the truth.
What, so now that he's a teenager,
he's gonna start lying to me?
No. Now that he's a teenager,
he probably won't talk to you at all.
I blew it.
I really blew it.
Dad...
he's not selling his blood
for liquor money.
I think there's still time.
-Hey, T.J.
-Hi.
Can we talk?
Okay.
Now first off, I think
I overreacted a little last night.
You're not grounded forever.
Thanks.
I'm sorry I drank.
That makes two of us.
Now, what you did was wrong, T.J.
Why do you think you did it?
I don't know.
Did you feel like you had to to fit in?
Maybe. Kinda.
Why don't you tell me what happened?
And let's see if you can use
more than two words.
I was having a pretty lousy time
at the party.
Nobody wanted to talk to me.
Then I ran into Rich and Kevin,
who I at least knew.
We started having a good time...
but... then they were drinking,
and I figured if I was gonna
hang out with them...
I should drink, too.
Okay.
I hear you, and I understand
there can be a lot of pressure out there,
but drinking and especially at your age,
is not the way to deal with it.
I know that.
Do we have to keep talking about this?
Yes...
we do have to keep talking about this
'cause the problem is I haven't been
talking to you about this before.
Look, I'm not gonna do it again, okay?
Good,
but now we got a trust issue
to deal with, son.
Now, you're gonna make mistakes in life,
I know it and you know it,
but the worst thing you can do
is lie to me about it.
But when you asked me if I was drinking,
lying really seemed like the way to go.
Okay, I get that. But now let's do this,
the next time you're
in a situation like that,
ask yourself one question,
"is this something I'm gonna have to lie
to my father about?"
'cause if the answer is yes,
it's probably something you
shouldn't be doing, isn't it?
Now, does this sound like
a workable situation?
I guess I can try that.
Thank you.
Bye.
Now that the whiners
have been fed, we eat.
No, thanks. I'll pass.
I know what's in this stuff.
I helped make it.
We don't eat this slop.
We eat roast duck with plum sauce
potatoes, scalloped,
green beans almondine,
and jell-o.
Mrs. Tudjman, you been holding out on us.
I'm a bad girl.
This stuff looks so good,
I could kiss you.
That can be arranged. You are ?
No... but he is.
Hey.
[clapper]
I'm never workin' for this guy again.
03x22 - Never Too Young
Watch/Buy Amazon
T.J. Henderson, who moves from being an elementary school student in the fourth grade to a high school student in the tenth grade, attending the same school as his two elder siblings.
T.J. Henderson, who moves from being an elementary school student in the fourth grade to a high school student in the tenth grade, attending the same school as his two elder siblings.